Misha's American
Journal

This page is an online journal intended to capture some of our observations of Misha since we arrived from Russia with him.

Misha gotcha date was November 9, 2005 in Kudymkar, Russia. We arrived back with him on November 15.

For a journal of our adoption trip to Russia, click here.

Jan 15 -School

At the time of this writing, Misha has been in America for about 60 days.

He has been in half-day kindergarten for about a month. His teachers say he is doing great. Misha shares a locker with another Russian student, Mark. Part of Misha's day is working with an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher. Misha also works with a speech therapist. The staff also includes a native Russian speaker if any situations arise.

Misha really enjoys going to school. In fact, when I asked him why he liked being here in America, the first thing he mentioned was the opporturnity to go to school.

We had some concerns about leaving him there at first. Tora thought she would slowly ween him. But by day two, Tora was just leaving him there.

The teacher loves Misha. She said he can be a little mischievous. Well, now we know is behaviour is consistent no matter who he is with.

Jan 15 -Family in transition

Misha has been adjusting very well. In fact, I think the family transition has been the easiest on him and probably the most difficult on Zildjian. We, as parents, have come to under the true meaning of "equality". Equilty is a concept that has no meaning until you have more than one child. If things are not equal, you have to answer to the why question.

Equality comes in different packages: attention, toys, food portions, interactions for Mom or Dad, etc. If we adhere to the golden equality rules, things run pretty smooth. An example: we have a stuffed toy seal in the bedroom loved by all. The boys alternate nights of possession. Their are 30 stuff animals to pick from but they share custody. (They do a good job of sharing.)

Our new last name is Solomon.

Without going into detail here, we've seen a lot of change in Z that requires management. At this stage, I'd say things are getting better overall. One positive: the common activities are increasing. Zildjian's need a outside friends (100% before) has dropped substantially. Even Misha's presence has had a positive impact in that regard.

The boys are playing together more often.

Misha has seemed to come to a hight acceptance of his new name. I'm sure we are there yet. He ackknowleges our family unit and seems to enjoy talking about it if you get him going on it.

1/15/06 - Language

Amazing. As I write this, Misha has pretty much dropped the Russian language. The only Russian he uses now is Russian words he has heard us use. Every single day he surprises with another half-dozen English words I didn't know he knew. He uses phases 5-8 words long. I sure his English vocabulary numbers in the several hundreds.

Even Russian parents with bi-lingual kids have difficulty in getting their kids to speak Russian. I don't like our odds here.

Misha knows the English alphabet and sample words that use the letters. He can probably count up to seventy or eighty in English.

We have arrived at a point where we understand him almost every time.

Tora and I took a little stroll around town. There was a town park with several statues including this one of Lenin.

I would have liked to see this city in the summer. I wonder if some of the drab dreariness wasn't the fact that it was November. Locals said they always had snow by this time of year (Nov 9).

Another monument in Kudymkar central park.

I'm not sure what it is, but it is date stamped 1579. A lot of history here.

Celebratory dinner for Sasha and Luda (far right end of table) at the Kudymkar Cafe after a successful court.

Vasily's (green shirt) court date was coming up after lunch.

We were just getting into town. Our court date was two days later.

Vasily, Sasha, and Luda (l to r) celebrating their new families that evening. They would leave for Perm that evening while we stayed behind to begin our process the next day.

Vas had just come from his orphanage for the last time. Because he had to leave an older sister behind, the event was bittersweet for him and his adopting parents (but that is their story)..

Speaking of difficulties, they seem to be laying in wait for most families that adopt. For us, it was not a sibling situation, but rather Misha's story of survival that had me down and out for a while. You discover the cold hard truth when you're least prepared to absorb it and process it.

After our first Kudymkar Cafe outing, we asked our driver Sasha to give us a tour of the town so we could snap some pictures.

He had the insight to take us to this impressive looking building. Sasha, in limited English and pantomime, told us this was a baby house (orphanage for kids from 0 -3 years old). We figured that this may have been Misha's home for two years.

We pulled up and met a man outside. He just so happened to be the chief medical doctor of the baby house. He also just so happened to be Misha's doctor while Misha resided here.

Dr. Alexander (left) proceeded to give us a full tour of the facility.

An irony was that days before meeting or knowing about this man, we had decided to change Misha's middle name to Alexander.

Next to the front of the building was a garden. Medicinal herbs were grown and used at the orphanage.

Hallway on the way to the doctor's office where we hung our coats and proceeded with our tour.

The baby house was very well kept, colorful, clean, and (while we were there) very quiet.

Kids are kept in small groups of 10-15 kids (just like Misha's orphanage).

I saw kids napping in the sleeping room (through a door just to the right in this picture). One little girl was awake. She looked up and stared at me but didn't move. I felt one of "those" tugs you get in situations like this, but could do nothing about it.

Baby house play area with lots of toys. The orphanage was well stocked with toys.

Tora poses in the Kudymkar courtroom.

Both Tora and I had to prepare speeches to give in front of the judge and the prosecutor. Both were women. Both witnesses that testified were also women.

Our impression was that everyone was very professional and had a bias toward the welfare of the children first.

The prosecutor asked a lot of good questions.

One tough question. Because a couple of Russian adopted child murders have occurred in the US recently, Tora was asked how she could guarantee this wouldn't happen in our family.

Anna acted as our interpreter throughout the session. Her abilities were amazing. We were most impressed.

In front of court building after successful court appearance.

Yes, that is the main entrance behind us.

Misha's orphanage.

He moved here at about 3 1/2 years old.

We picked him up a few days after his 6th birthday.

Misha was anxious to show us his bedroom and bed (#11).

He usually shared a sleeping area with about 8-12 other kids.

Bed was thin mattress set atop plywood similar to a toddler bed in the US. Each bed had a mat on the floor next to it.

This is my favorite shot at the orphanage. It reminds me why we were there. Although the orphans had relatively good care at this orphanage, there is little reason for a kid here to have any real hopes and dreams. To me, it was depressing for that reason. Their world is so limited and the caretakers can only do so much.

Another shot from the sleeping area.

The caretaker could work at the desk while the children slept or napped.

In the background, Tora is talking to Misha's favorite caretaker through our interpreter Anna.

Main living area for Misha's group adjacent to the sleeping area.

This room had an eating table (I believe kids are having a evening snack in photo), and what I call an activity area (foreground). Well kept, lots of activities/toys, bright, and well lit.

This group living arrangement was duplicated 4 or 5 times in the orphanage. I was told kids could visit other groups. There were roughly 60 - 70 kids total in the orphanage.

Bathroom area just off main activity area.

Each child was assigned a rack for their towel.

We had about 10 minutes to visit Misha's area and take pictures. When we arrived, we were told it was snack time for Misha's group.

I'm not sure what they were eating. It looked like some kind of pasta but I wasn't sure.

All the kids were curious about us during our presence but basically calm. Another family in our travel were mobbed at the front gate when they visited their adoptive son's orphanage. It was so crazy for them, they were never able to take pictures. (Kids at that orphanage were older than these kids.)

Misha's group shot.

One child was sick so was not present. Another in the photo had broken out from something. Of course, he was the one in my face all the time.

Misha's best friend is the girl on the left.

Groups are co-ed.

There were three other children from this orphanage who participated in the same summer program Misha did. They are waiting for their court date. We were able to say hello and take pictures of two of the three children. Misha was the first of the four to be adopted via our agency's program.

Stairway by Misha's group area.

Leopold the cat is one of Misha's favorite Russian cartoon characters (located upper right on the landing montage).

Hallway by orphanage entrance.

This is the area where the food was prepared. It was a very strong smell like a cabbage smell. I didn't favor it.

Every place we saw was very well kept.

Misha hoping for room service at the Kudymkar hotel. We left for Perm about an hour later.

Six of us drove in a car to Perm for the next 4 hours. Our driver's car kept bottoming out. Misha slept the entire trip by laying across the three adults in the backseat.

We were deposited at Galina's and Mikhail's flat in Perm at 2:30 in the morning. Misha saw the cats and then the real fun began. We all got back to sleep about 4:30 am.

Did I mention the cat?

Oy!

Galina's kitchen in Perm.

We stayed here for three nights and had no access to the outside world unless someone picked us up. Bummer. It was our agency's way of getting things done and keeping us out of trouble, I figure.

After hearing horror stories from other adopting parents at the US Embassy in Moscow, being holed up didn't seem so bad after all.

This family sacrificed for us by sleeping in their office and giving us their bedroom.

Mikhail hangs out with Misha while we went shopping. I guess that makes Mikhail our first babysitter. He used an old American standard method ~ the TV.

Mikhail's favorite TV show was an American show "Charmed" with Russian overdub. He watched it each night he came home from his engineering job. (Galina taught Russian literature.)

The American music and TV influence in Russia is huge. More than half the time when we heard music (restaurants, car stereos, shopping, etc.) the music was American.

Galina and Mikhail's flat on the seventh floor.

Not much to look at outside, but very nice inside. Very efficient use of space (if you like that kind of thing).

Agency's Russian team in Perm with four new adoptees in the front row.

At the Moscow airport after arriving from Perm. Misha liked to ride the luggage.

It was good to be one step closer to home.

Red Square.

We visited Red Square about a half dozen times. Our hotel was the Hotel Rossiya (white building, left in far background) and was about a 5 minute walk from Red Square.

We toured St. Basil's Cathedral (behind us), the Kremlin, the armory at the Kremlin, the GUM next to Red Square, the subways, and more.

While entering the Kremlin, a Russian guard asked our tour guide if I was a Ruski. (The Kremlin tour rate is much lower for the locals.) While there, my Russian heritage (I'm 25% Russian) was pointed out a number of times. Our agency head said Misha and I share several of the same physical features.

Russian make-a-wish circle near Red Square.

The idea is to make a wish and toss a coin(s) over your shoulder. (Locals are available at no charge to clean up your mess.)

Misha enjoyed trying to lodge coins in bystanders' eyeballs. His tosses were not subtle.

This was an amazing river structure commemorating Peter the Great a little ways from the Kremlin. We passed it on the way to the US Embassy.

Here is better shot of it on someone else's web site.

The infamous barrier.

I was walking with Misha in arm like in the picture. Misha pointed straight up and asked me to look at a bird. I did so.

The next thing I know my lower body stopped and my upper body kept moving. I did a head-over-heels with Misha in my arms never letting go of him. I was too top heavy to stop the acrobatics.

The Russians that were once crowding to get through the archway instantly cleared a large circular area around the downed American. Everyone was talking. I understood nothing but didn't need to. There were dozens of expressions of concern. Misha was laughing., however. He thought it was hilarious.

Howard, one of the Americans in our party who was walking behind me, said my feet were above his head at one point.

No one was seriously hurt and the event caused comic relief to the group for two days. We all needed comic relief badly.

Luda often took Misha under her wing. This shot was taken on the way to the US Embassy the day before we left Moscow for New York.

As you might expect, the kids took comfort in each other's company. Misha always seemed more at ease after hanging with the other kids.

In my opinion in the early stages of the adoption and family process, the language barrier is by far the largest obstacle in parenting these kids.

On the way home, Misha and Vas (Jake) share a movie.

The trip from Hotel Rossiya in Moscow to the Humphey Terminal took 24 hours. The flight from Moscow to New York took 10.5 hours.

Hanging with Mom and listening to a CD story in Russian.

When we landed in New York, Misha and the other three immigrant children became U.S citizens.

After a short layover, we were on our way to Minneapolis for the final leg. Jet backup kept us on the ground for nearly two hours waiting to takeoff. This would have never happened at the Perm airport, but at least JFK has flushing toilets.

Ashley (a friend from this past summer) welcomes Misha at the airport.

While still in the air, Misha was so tired that he cried when we tried to wake him. But he was ready to go again when we finally landed. After we made it home, Misha fell asleep right away.

In the 10 days we have been home, Misha has shown zero outer effects from jet lag. His body instantly adjusted to the new time zone. I'm still adjusting from my short visit to Russia.

Since being home (10 days as of this writing), Misha has adjusted remarkably well. Unlike the crazy days we had at first during his summer visit, Misha has settled right in this time around. It's like his little mind has been preparing for this moment for the past five months.

We seldom use timeouts this time around. Rather, when he is upset, he puts himself into a timeout (and sulks). It's now his way of handling frustrating moments.

Most nights, HE ASKS US if he can go to bed (unheard of this summer). We have already established a bedtime routine.

He won't go to sleep until we pray with him. Funny, since he has no idea what we are doing when we pray (yet).

During the day, the antics never stop around home. Here (left) he found joy in trying to walk in Papa's size 10 hiking boots.

On a visit to our friend's house, Misha found the dress up box in the playroom and proceeded to model each of the costumes (left).

He seems to enjoy every destination he rides to in the car whether it be a friend, a relative, a store, or a park.

He is eating us out of house and home. His food interests seem to come and go in phases. Something he makes a face at one day gets heavily consumed the next (i.e. bread, milk). He just as quickly abandons foods he loved just days before (i.e. pot stickers, Russian bologna).

Tora made a comment that he looked really American here in this photo. (Some of his prominent Asian features are hidden by the costume.)

11/26/05

At home Misha is quickly picking up English words and phrases. We notice him speaking new words every day. We have practiced writing his new American name in English. He looks for books so he can copy the English letters he sees on the covers. He knows most of his numbers in English.

We hope to start him in kindergarten this week. He was surprised to find out from a Russian speaking friend of ours that kids start school when they are only 5 in America. In Russia, they wait until 7 years of age. Until this was explained to him, he couldn't understand why we planned to send him to school so soon.

He is learning to use the computer and run the mouse. (His little hand can barely reach the buttons.) At left, he is running some pre-school software that is teaching him letters, numbers, colors, and shapes.

Some of the others things he has already enjoyed since being here:

• sledding at the park
• going to the library and picking out books
• taking a bath each night
• story time each night
• lots of stuffed animals to share space with each night
• blowing up and popping balloons with a scissors while standing behind Mom or Dad and laughing (hope this desire wears off soon)
• bowling
• drumming
• hide-and-seek
• asking for Yogurt 300 times a day
• joining brother Zildjian in fighting against Papa
• swinging at the park
• ball tag at the park