Go Away: An Introduction

Hi, I’m Scott Tobias, and welcome to my self-indulgent webpage. If you don’t know me personally or haven’t conferred with me electronically, then you’ve somehow stumbled way the hell off course. Here, let me send you on your way.

Still here? Okay, friends, I don’t really want you to go away, but I can’t promise any compelling reasons to stick around, either. Since I’m already well-paid to write reviews professionally for the Zeppo section of The Onion, I have no intention of doing the same thing here for free. [And since 2002, I haven't written a word!]

Other notes on the site:

The section on fantasy baseball, "The Dusty Middle Innings," will cover various transactions, stratagems, and progress reports over the course of the season. I’ll try to explain the rationale behind my decisions and welcome any input you might have with regard to trade proposals, player acquisitions, et al. I’ve played the Yahoo! and ESPN leagues for three years now and I’ve won my league two out of three years in both, so perhaps you’ll find my obsessiveness useful or inspiring in some way. Or, perhaps not.
[And yet another thing I haven't don't since 2002!]

I know my links page will seem a little redundant to some, but I wanted to provide a clear exit strategy from my site to others that are more worthy of your time. I’ve always found it unfortunate that high-concept, low-yield websites like The Teen Movie Critic or Mr. Cranky get all the attention from the press while the really interesting writers and cineastes labor in relative obscurity. If nothing else, I’d like to do my part to remedy this injustice.

The section on the Toronto Film Festival, "Uptown Again," is a continuation of a project started by Toronto-based screenwriter and cineaste Skander Halim, who graciously allowed me to take over after he shut down his website. The participants are all friends of mine, many of them professional and/or net critics, who descend upon the great movie smorgasbord in Toronto every September. The polls would seem to have limited appeal on this website until you consider that the participants comprise a sizable portion of my readership. As a wise man once said, "See You In Toronto!"

What The Grades Mean

A= Hoo mama!
A-= Oh baby!
B+= Oh boy!
B= Pretty good
B-= Pretty good
C+= Eh
C= Feh
C-= Geh
D+= Pffft
D= Oh boy!
D-= Oh baby!
F= Hoo mama!