Vol 6 No. 5, Jul 28 - Aug 3 2005

TIMBER FANS GONE WILDER The Timber Army Meet the Geordies by Phil Busse Cries of "Oy mate" and "h’way the lads" rang out on Saturday at PGE Park as the Sunderland Black Cats came to play Portland's very own pro-am team the Timbers. Sunderland, whose black and white stripe clad fans were out in force, are a new franchise in the English Premier League and visited as part of a 3 game preseason tour. Part exhibition, part fact finding tour (Sunderland are one of a number of EFL clubs considering installing Astroturf in their stadium back home as the plastic "grass" gives a truer, fairer bounce) the visiting team and fans must have been impressed at the 15,000+ fans packed into PGE Park, Portland's very own Stadium of Lights. The Timber Army, the Timbers very own rag-tag group of preppies, punks and old-timey roustabouts, were out in full voice again getting up to their usual shenanigans, booing through national anthems, cussing out their bitter rivals Chicago and bringing out their famous "You suck armpits” chant one more time. The game was a tight one with each team playing multiple substitutions. Timbers coach Bobby Howe (once one of the EFL’s soccer greats) even played his new signings Barrett Marcum and Jared White to great excitement from the stands. The game ended zero-zero but the Timbers’ Byron Alvarez could have won the game with a first-half penalty strike. Sportsmanship prevailed as the plucky offence-man lifted the ball high over the Sunderland goal and into the crowds above as if to say…”It’s a friendly, you’re our guests, were all equal in the great world of soccer, let’s cross the finishing line together” Truly a magical moment. I bumped into many famous faces and they all asked me (after congratulating me on my well run campaign for mayor last year) Phil, What is it you like about the great game of soccer. I told them that it's the running, the jumping, the falling over, but most of all it's the camaraderie between myself (a humble media/political mover and shaker) and my mates in the Timber Army. Rose City Till I’m Deaf! or RCTID as we say. Happy Offsides! Go Clive! Phil. The Timbers play at PGE Park against USL rivals the San Jose Earthquake on Wedesday, Aug 3 at 7 pm. Drinking begins at least an hour before the game at The Bullpen, 1730 SW Taylor (and, win or lose, continues there after the game).

THE MERCS GUIDE TO PORTLAND'S GAY WEATHERMEN Hot Front by Dr. J. W. Sanders, M.D WHITE NOISE ON FILM DeLillo Gets the Men in Black Treatment by Katie Shimer ASIAGO HIPSTERS Hipsters Review Portland's Best Grilled Cheese by Kathleen Wilson