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As Dr. Frank’n’Swine Cooks It  

If you’ve never heard of Dr. Frank’n’Swine, today’s your day for a splendid discovery. Frank Ferzoco is the man I refer you to, a Certified BBQ Judge, master cooker supreme, who wears a cap with two stars and a perfect score pin.  He stands before an array of trophies that even Tiger Woods would admire. He and his wife Tammy, or Bride of Dr. Frank’n’Swine as he refers to her, are available to come with their team to your home, and provide you and your guests with the best barbecue you’ve ever tasted. He likes to do parties for fifty or more people and charges $25.00 per person. It’s worth every penny and more because this is Southern style barbecue as barbecue should be enjoyed.                   

They bring their own serving tables, a 12’x20’ tent to cover all of the food and serving tables, plus cutlery and plates. What you will need to provide are tables and chairs for your guests, trash barrels, beverages for your guests and a power and water supply for the Doctor.

Here’s how it goes. At nine or ten in the morning, Dr. Frank’n’Swine and his staff will roll into your garden his giant eight-foot portable smoker. It looks like a small Airstream trailer set on end. He had it fabricated especially for his business. By four p.m. you’ll be ready to party. He’s been in this business a long time. and has been competing in barbecue events with medals to prove it, for the last fifteen years. Recently at Peter’s Pond in Sandwich, he took three first prizes, ending with a perfect score. So, you have only to put yourself in his hands and decide whom to invite to share this grand experience.

During the day, you will wallow in the aromas of award-winning ribs, pork butt and chicken being smoked in apple wood as you set your tables. This is a special occasion, one on which you might want to go all out: string Japanese lanterns in the trees, hire a country Western band and put down a dance-floor if you have the room and the inclination. For your tables, and round ones are best because they draw people together, let your imagination go wild. You might consider renting a mix of brightly colored cloths and buying a batch of inexpensive square-dance bandanas to use as napkins at someplace like Ocean State Job Lot or the Christmas Tree Shop. Light your tables with candles in hurricane globes.   

His menu begins with appetizers: homemade spinach dip in hollowed-out loaves of dark bread, smoked steak fingers, his special barbecue wings ranging from mild to hot, veggie platters and classic pulled pork sandwiches topped with slaw (see recipe) in the true southern tradition.

Next comes the cornbread made by Frank’n’Swine’s bride, a favorite made with love and some special ingredients. With this, the fabulous ribs, the chicken, the southern style baked beans and the red cabbage slaw with homemade vinaigrette. And you can keep going back as often as you like. That’s why a little music and a little dancing might just spur you on to another plateful. This is the kind of meal for which a selection of beers and ales nestled in an icy tub would be appropriate. And for those who’d prefer wine to beer, any robust red wine, such as Zinfandel, would be just right.

For dessert there are platters of seasonal fruits, which is all you need, unless the occasion is a birthday or an anniversary, in which case it’s on you to provide a cake or whatever else you might want. But I’ll bet it won’t be much. I know, because I’ve been there, done that, and can’t wait to do it again.

Dr. Frank’n’Swine’s number is (508) 255-3401 and remember to book him well ahead of your event because his calendar fills up quickly.           

           

Dr. Frank’n’Swine’s Famous Pulled Pork

Directions for cooking are for a charcoal grill, but can be done on a

gas grill keeping heat as low as possible.

 

1 pork roast, either Boston Butt or Picnic Ham, 6-8 pounds

 

Dry rub enough for about 1 cup

 5 tablespoons of paprika

2 tablespoons dark brown sugar

2 tablespoons chili powder

1 tablespoon ground cumin

2 tablespoons salt

1 tablespoon cayenne pepper

1 tablespoon ground black pepper

2 tablespoons granulated garlic

1 tablespoon ground celery seed

 

Massage dry rub thoroughly into the meat and wrap in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for at least 6 hours. Longer is okay.

Load charcoal briquettes into a covered outdoor grill and ignite. When the briquettes are covered with gray ash, they are ready. Rake them to one side of the grill. Place the grill cover vents on the opposite side as the coals. Let heat up for five minutes or so; then scrape the grill and place the butt on the side away from coals. Put the cover on the grill.

Every hour or so, add around ten briquettes to maintain a temperature of about 250-275 F; 225-250 F. is even better, but it takes longer for the meat to cook. After about four hours, remove the butt and wrap tightly in foil. Return it to the grill and continue to cook for another hour. Remove from the grill and let stand in foil another hour.

Unwrap and when cool enough to handle, shred or pull the pork with a pair of forks.

Add about a cup of your favorite BBQ sauce.

Serve in a hamburger bun topped with coleslaw.

© Jebba M. Handley. All Rights Reserved.
Olive tree illustration by Jebba M. Handley.