Valentine's Day

I hate Valentine's Day. It's the one day of the year that makes single people feel lonely and everyone else feel broke.

I've actually been dumped on Valentine's Day. A girl I was seeing waxed her bikini area (her "Queefer Southerland", as I called it) for me as a Valentine's Day present. When she showed it to me, she said, "Surprise!"

"Oh! Wow! It's what I've always wanted," I said. "What is it?"

"It's called the Brazilian," she said.

"Are you sure it's not called the German? It kinda looks like Hitler eating a Bologna sandwich."

It sounded funny at the time.

The point is, she could have just gotten me a funny card and I wouldn't have spent the day alone watching QVC and Full House re-runs. People go overboard doing things they wouldn't normally do to impress their Valentine.

A friend of mine spent $300 on candy and flowers for a girl he barely liked. $300! If you're going to spend that much money on food and a dead plant, you should buy some Cheetos and a sack of weed. Then, if you end up alone for any reason, Full House will still be funny.

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Bad Haircut

I told the girl to take about an inch off the top - she took two inches. At first I thought, "I can't believe this girl doesn't know how long two inches really is." Then I thought, "I should ask her out."

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Lee's Summit Journal Article

Two articles in one day! This one on the front page!!!

Lee's Summit comedian to headline local show
by Pete Gutschenritter


Brad Meehan of Lee's Summit is a computer software engineer by day, but by night he's a comedian.

On Thursday evening Meehan will be performing at Third Street Pub. The show begins at 8:30 PM and also will feature Kansas City comedians Will C and Mike Baldwin. Comedian Chris Johnson will be the emcee for the event.

Meehan comes into Third Street Pub fresh off a 2005 year in which he was named All Comedy Radio's "Funniest Person in Kansas City." Baldwin is a two-time winner of the award.

But for as high an accolade as that award is, Meehan has only been doing comedy for two years. Over that span of two years, Meehan has performed throughout the Kansas City area, including Stanford and Son's in Overland Park, Topeka, and Parkville, MO.

He has been the featured performer or opening act for nationally known comedians Greg Giraldo, Lisa Lampanelli and Michael Winslow in the past as well.

Unlike Giraldo, Lampanelli and Winslow, Meehan doesn't spend much time touring outside the metro area.

"I work full-time, so this is mainly a after-hours hobby for me," said Meehan, a computer sofware engineer at Commerce Bank in Lee's Summit.

Thursday's show will be Meehan's first performance at Third Street Pub. It's the sixth comedy show for Third Street Pub over the past five years.

"We'd like to increase (the number of comedy shows)," said Shirley Tarantino, owner of the Third Street Pub. "We try to work them in whenever we need a good laugh."

With his $700 public address system he won from the 2005 award, Meehan has ventured to various bars not known for comedy shows in the past.

"I've been looking for alternative places to perform and going to local places, so the timing (for Third Street Pub) is perfect," Meehan said.

Meehan said the rating of the show is "somewhere between PG-13 and mild R."

"I've experienced shows when people do edgier stuff, and not everyone is into that," he said.

Meehan said the goal for the show is to find a new niche in Lee's Summit.

"We're real excited about it," Meehan said.



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Potty Mouth

There was a GREAT article written about me in The Pitch this week. Check this out!

Potty Mouth
-Alan Scherstuhl

Any comic will tell you : Being funny isn't enough.

That is, if you can find a comic. What you'll likely wind up with are office cutups and IT folks who dream of the brick-wall-and-a-microphone spotlight.

"You have to make things happen," says Brad Meehan, a youngish Lee's Summit native who, after winning a competition sponsored by comedy radio station KDTD 1340, not only can bullet-point comic on his resume, but also add "Kansas City's Funniest Person." Meehan continues, "I used to be the guy that would wait for good things to happen. Now I know that she ain't going to dance until you ask."

Because months can pass between performance slots at the big clubs, Meehan gets the funny out any way he can. His show tonight (with Will C, Chris Johnson and Mike Baldwin) at the 3rd Street Pub is self-booked and self-promoted. He tests new jokes on his blog, http://www.shakyvoice.com/. (A sample: "Last night we got drunk and went clubbing. Everyone had a great time. Except, of course, the baby seals.")

He has published a bathroom reader of some of his favorite bits, attracting the praise of stand-up queen Wendy Liebman. And he's that guy who calls 610 Sports as Christopher Walken. Radio, publishing and he even owns a PA system - it's a multimedia empire. Looks like Kansas City has been asked to dance.

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Vigalantee

Please help support my friend Vigalantee and pick up his new album, "No Jaangle Movement." He is a very talented rapper with a positive message.

Give him a listen: http://cdbaby.com/cd/vigalantee




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