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God's
voice mail !
Most
of us have now learned to live with voice mail
as a necessary part of
our lives.
Have you ever wondered what it would be like if
God decided to install voice mail? Imagine
praying and hearing the
following:
Thank you
for calling
heaven.
For English
press
1
For Spanish
press
2
For
all other languages, press
3
Please
select one of the following
options:
Press 1 for
request
Press 2 for
thanksgiving
Press 3 for
complaints
Press 4 for
all
others
I am sorry,
all our Angels and Saints are busy helping other
sinners right now. However, your prayer is
important to us and we will answer it in the
order it was
received. Please stay on the
line.
If
you would like to speak
to:
God, press
1
Jesus, press
2
Holy Spirit,
press
3
To find a
loved one that has been assigned to heaven press
5, then enter
his social
security # followed by the pound
sign.
(If you
receive a negative response, please hang up and
dial area
code
666)
For
reservations to heaven, please enter JOHN
followed by the numbers,
3
16.
For
answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs,
life and other planets,
please wait until you
arrive in heaven for the
specifics.
Our
computers show that you have already been prayed
for today, please
hang up and call again
tomorrow.
The
office is now closed for the weekend to observe
a religious holiday.
If
you are calling after hours and need emergency
assistance, please
contact your local
pastor.
Thank you and have a heavenly
day.
Pass this
on if you wish to brighten some one's
day
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