Subtraction of the Week:Submarine Voyage
Music for Diving:
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Subtraction of the Week:Submarine Voyage
Music for Diving:
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Iago: You know what I like about living at Disney, Zazu? They got this ENORMOUS bird bath!
Zazu: You mean the swimming pool at the resort?
Iago: Naw, those are always full of noisy tourists and there's no privacy. I'm talking about those really big pools right inside the Magic Kingdom and Disneyland between Tomorrowland and Fantasyland. They're big, empty, and both have these nice waterfalls for times I feel like a shower instead of a bath.
Zazu: Iago, it sounds like you're describing the Submarine Lagoons! At 7.1 and 11 million gallons, they would be hard to mistake for birdbaths.
Iago: Submarines? I never saw any submarines. I never saw any kind of marines in them at all ... except for that one time during the Night of Joy last year....
Zazu: The submarines may not be there now, but those are very famous lagoons! They once housed the world's seventh largest fleet of submarines, and the largest fleet of non-combat submersibles.
Iago: You gotta be kidding! Since when did Disney have a navy?
Zazu: Well, since 6 June 1959, deep in the heart of the cold war, and less than a year since the US Navy's Commander Anderson sailed the real Nautilus beneath the ice to the North Pole. Along with the Matterhorn and Monorail, the Submarine Voyage was one of the original four "E-Ticket" rides at Disneyland.
Iago: "E-Ticket"? "E-Yuck", I say! Who would want to be stuffed in a can and dunked underwater? You wouldn't be able to see a thing.
Zazu: Well, it seems that 38 passengers at a time for almost 40 years were quite willing. You see, unlike every other submarine afloat -- or submerged -- Disney submarines have portholes.
Iago: That doesn't sound like standard equipment.
Zazu: Of course not, this is Disney! They had the submarines built their own specifications by Todd Shipyards in San Pedro. And a fine fleet it was, too. The design was based on the first nuclear submarine, the Nautilus. Others carrying the authentic gray livery were the Triton, Seawolf, Skate, Skipjack, George Washington, Patrick Henry, and Ethan Allen.
Iago: How very patriotic.
Zazu: That was the fifties for you. Thirty years later, times had changed, and Disney changed with them. The submarines were reassigned to undersea research, and five were renamed. The fleet now boasted the Nautilus, Triton, Seawolf, Neptune, Sea Star, Explorer, Seeker, and Argonaut -- all painted a bright safety yellow.
Iago: You mean as in, "We All Live In A?"
Zazu: I'm afraid so.
Iago: Sheesh! And I thought Donald's rubber ducky was tacky! At least the subs at the Magic Kingdom never had to put up with that indignity.
Zazu: No, they were a completely different model. Instead of being based on real submarines, they were based on the Nautilus from the movie "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea," and were named for that film.
Iago: Wasn't that also the name of an old Disneyland attraction?
Zazu: You have a good memory for being such a parrot. Yes, the set pieces from that film were on display at Disneyland from opening until August 1966. They even had the giant squid on display there.
Iago: I remember that. Looked like a cross between calimari and Godzilla! Can you imagine how much marinara sauce that would have needed?
Zazu: As I was saying, the Magic Kingdom submarines opened in October 1971 with a fleet of nine, later expanding to an even dozen. Like their west coast counterparts, these too were powered by diesel engines.
Iago: Are you saying the nuclear subs were liquid fueled?
Zazu: What more appropriate way to visit the wonders of "Liquid Space" as it was billed.
Iago: "Liquid Space?" What's that?
Zazu: Like most Disney spaces, it's mostly fiberglass, only wet. The submarines began their voyages by diving to periscope depth. As soon as you cleared the docks, you could see the colorful life of a tropical reef. There were fish, sharks, starfish, kelp, whales, octopus, lobsters....
Iago: Any mermaids? I especially like mermaids!
Zazu: As a matter of fact, there were mermaids in the Disneyland lagoon during the inagural summer and again during the summers of 1965 through 1967.
Iago: Why did they leave? Did the animatronics get wet?
Zazu: No, no, no. These weren't animatronic, they were real live mermaids (at least, from the waist up). Lovely lasses, they smiled, waved, and blew kisses to passersby.
Iago: Hubba, hubba! That would explain the marines in the birdbath then.
Zazu: Er, yes. Unvited guests were one of the problems with the mermaid program. That and the scuba divers swimming out to check on the girls all the time.
Iago: For scenery like that I could put up with some fish scales in my bathwater.
Zazu: Iago, it's not your ... oh nevermind. The rest of the finned creatures weren't quite so convincing as the mermaids, and some sharp-eyed birds could even see the monofilament line used to hold the swimmers in position.
Iago: That's a nice touch! For once fishing line is used to keep fish in the water.
Zazu: Exactly. Other features of the attraction were a cruise under the ice cap at the North Pole, views of shipwrecks (not Disney piloted ships, of course), and sunken ruins believed to be the lost city of Atlantis. Not to mention the thrill of sailing into the cave under those big waterfalls.
Iago: Those caves led directly to the ocean, right?
Zazu: Er ... no, they went to the submarine vault.
Iago: Is that anything like Vault Disney on the TV?
Zazu: No, it's the huge show building the size of several football fields where most of the attraction took place. It was located underneath the Autopia at Disneyland, and just north of the lagoon at the Magic Kingdom.
Iago: Autopia? Isn't that all surrounded by trees and bushes? How could there be a building under all that?
Zazu: Just think of it as a roof garden. Nicely hidden, isn't it?
Iago: I'll say, for a moment there I thought you were starting to hallucinate.
Zazu: Hallucination is not all that uncommon on this attraction. Many visitors return with claims of having sighted sea serpents, though I suspect they were just hyperventilating from the excitement.
Iago: Speaking of ventilating, how did people breathe under all that water?
Zazu: Oh there was never any danger of not breathing. There were air vents on the deck of the submarine and a tiny blower jet under each porthole.
Iago: Hello? Excuse me Zazu, but submarines go underwater!!! How much good is an "air vent" going to do them?
Zazu: Actually, the submarines never got any further under the water than they were at the loading dock. They stayed at the same depth the whole way.
Iago: You mean all that stuff the captain said about, "Dive! Dive! Dive!" and "Periscope Depth" and all that was just....
Zazu: A recording, yes. All part of the magic of Disney Imagineering.
Iago: You're breaking my heart here. So you're saying they just floated along like the boats in the Jungle Cruise?
Zazu: Um, no, I wouldn't exactly call it floating....
Iago: So what would you call it then?
Zazu: Er ... Rolling.
Iago: Rolling? As in wheels?
Zazu: You have to remember Iago, the subs weighed 58 tons. They also didn't want them bobbing around at the dock, so it was much simpler to just make them heavier than water and let them roll along a track in the bottom of the lagoon.
Iago: I am so disappointed! I'm crushed! Look at me, I'm so mortified I'm molting!
Zazu: Perhaps, but it is safer this way. Better molting than drowning.
Iago: Good point. Everybody does stay dry this way.
Zazu: Yes, unfortunately even the submarines have been dry for the past few years.
Iago: How'd they do that? Roll up on the beach like sick whales?
Zazu: No, those "sick wails" are coming from our readers' reaction to these puns. The submarines were hauled out for some much needed maintenance, but were found to be in such poor condition as to be more suited to different roles.
Iago: Different rolls? They're turning them into giant croissants?
Zazu: <glares> I don't know whether I'm more amazed by the stuipidity of that question or the fact that you can actually spell "croissant."
Iago: Well, I figured a bagel would leak. The hole, you know.
Zazu: You mean like the one in your head? Actually, the new role for a couple of the submarines involved putting more holes in them and sinking them quite deliberately.
Iago: Yikes! And I thought it was bad news when the ride just stopped!
Zazu: True, but the subs are much happier now -- they're on permanent vacation at Disney's Castaway Cay in the Bahamas. They are providing an artificial reef on the bottom of the lagoon there.
Iago: Reminds me of something that happened to my uncle once at a family party. He never took good care of his dentures, and they fell into the soupbowl.
Zazu: And the connection is?
Iago: Artificial reef in the harbor -- artificial teeth in the chowder!
Zazu: Can we go back to discussing submarines? Please?
Iago: Sure. What say we make a trip to California and ride the Disneyland submarines?
Zazu: Alas, you're too late (as usual). The entire California fleet was decomissioned recently. The day after Mr. Toad closed in Florida, in fact.
Iago: So what's going to happen to my birdbath?
Zazu: Rumor has it that the Disneyland lagoon is going to be completely rehabbed, beginning in late 2000, and possibly rethemed to "Atlantis."
Iago: "Atlantis?" Isn't that a ride at Sea World?
Zazu: Yes, but that's not what I mean. "Atlantis" is also an animated feature that's under development at Disney Animation. If all goes as presently scheduled, in the summer of 2001 we may actually see an attraction opened at the same time as the film.
Iago: That would be novel.
Zazu: No, actually Iago, that would be naval.
The music selected to accompany this page is "Under the Sea" by Howard Ashman from the film "The Little Mermaid."