D-List 2 & 3: Lesbians, Strap-Ons, and Sad News

Last week, Kathy Griffin went on a faux date with Nick Carter, the Backstreet Boy and Wigger. I apologize if my use of this word offends anyone; I'm merely repeating what came out of Kathy's mouth. Yeah, so I still don't understand why she would even consider hanging out with Nick Carter. Damselfly over at the Bravissimo Blog noted that a lot of the scenes this season are too contrived. Of course, this is reality television, and that’s to be expected. However, some of the situations she gets herself into are just awkward (and boring). I’m sure Nick’s a nice guy, but he’s old news. I’d much rather see her hanging out with Rosie or some random gay person. How about her BFF Lance Bass?



I did, however, enjoy seeing her hang out with Rachel True. I haven’t seen Rachel in ages. She played Mary Jane in the hilarious movie Half Baked, and she also played a teen witch in the surprisingly effective film The Craft. Rachel was Kathy’s dating coach, and she shared some words of wisdom with our beloved comedienne.

Have fun and be comfortable. And push those tits up!

Rachel’s right; straight men love that! I find it funny that Rachel didn’t mention the important stuff—like, I don’t know . . . personality? Ok, that doesn’t make for good TV. It’s all about tits. Got it.

So, nothing of interest happened last week. Actually, I have to admit that Tom is growing on me. The guy really seems to be doing his job. I have to give credit to Ms. Place for believing in his potential. She was right. However, I still have no clue what Jessica and Tiffany are doing there. I’ve seen them write stuff down on note pads, and they help Kathy write emails. That’s it! Are they really necessary?



This week (episode 3), Kathy Griffin didn’t pull any punches. She aimed to please her gay viewers, and she succeeded. Yep, they finally showed Kathy working out with none other than Jackie Warner at SkySport and Spa. We knew it was coming, of course. But it was nice seeing Jackie again; I kind of miss her, actually.

We knew from a previous episode that Kathy was scheduled to perform on one of Rosie O’Donnell’s famous cruises. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking: LESBIANS! A lot of lesbians (and their children). And Kathy was determined to be a hit on that cruise. So, the main reason Kathy stopped by SkySport and Spa was to ask her new lesbian friend, Jackie, for some advice. Here’s what Jackie said about cracking a Lesbian audience,

Lesbians don’t like sexual references, but they love to talk about sex toys. I recommend you talk about every type of strap-on and vibrator.

Ok, so . . . if you want to be a hit with a Lesbian audience, then you should not make any sexual references. However, it’s ok to talk about sex toys. Hm, that makes no sense to me. Both topics have to do with sex. Whatever. We’ll just have to take Jackie’s word for it. Then, just when we thought things couldn’t get any gayer, Jackie introduced Kathy to Gage, a gay porn star. He should look familiar; he’s the guy who made Jesse sweat on the 7th episode of Workout. Yeah, Gage is a hunk, and Kathy was all over him.

One thing I love about Life on the D-List is that they show the business side of comedy. Kathy is such a hard worker. She rarely turns down a gig. We’ve seen her give flawless performances, but we’ve also seen her flop from time to time. That’s just the nature of the business. I have more to say about Kathy as a comedian, but I’ll save that for another post.



Ok, now let’s get to the sad stuff. I’m sure most of you noticed that my previous (Top Chef) post was a tad on the negative side. Well, I’m convinced that Bravo is just messing with my head. The last few episodes of Workout Season 2 were heartbreaking. Clay, the charming Southern boy on Top Chef 3, was eliminated last week. Well, this is the D-List episode we’ve all been dreading; yeah, Kathy was forced to deal with her father’s death. It just broke my heart that she wasn’t with him when he passed away. You know, the one thing I really enjoy about the D-List is watching Kathy discuss various things with her parents (Sean Hannity?). Hilarious! And it was great to see how supportive they were of her career choices. Well, it’s sad that Mr. Griffin is no longer with us. But, as they say, the show must go on.