Halloween Costume Ideas: Fun In Space

Who doesn't remember Mel Brook's 1987 comedy Spaceballs? Even if you didn't enjoy the film, there's no denying that it's full of colorful characters. And how hot was Bill Pullman in that movie? Anyway, if you're looking for some Halloween costume ideas, this is the post for you. Here are two characters that caught my eye.



John Candy as Barfolemew (aka Barf)



Rick Moranis as Dark Helmet

What's On Dumbledore's Mind?

Click on the image below to find out. Wait! If you're at work, you may want to wait until you get home.



I'm sorry. I saw this image of Daniel Radcliffe on another blog and just had to use it. Also, there's no harm in looking. He's legal now.

Youtube + Brain Fart + Beauty Queen = Comedic Gold

I’ve made it very clear that I love almost everything about pageants—the beautiful women, the nature of the competition, and the joy of finding that one delegate who can flawlessly recite a few lines from a pageant pattie handbook. Essentially, the crown is reserved for the gorgeous woman who can deliver a few lines without stuttering or sounding like a total ass. However, on rare occasions, you’ll have a woman like Chelsi Smith, a former Miss Universe from Texas, who is beyond amazing. Chelsi is best remembered as a beauty queen with brains.

Well, a few weeks ago, a young South Carolina beauty queen by the name of Lauren Caitlin Upton made headlines when she delivered an unintelligible answer to one of the final questions. Not surprisingly, she didn’t win the Miss Teen USA crown. I feel bad for her. It’s very stressful to be on stage and deliver a performance of a lifetime. She didn't deliver; the poor girl failed miserably.



Again, I am a huge supporter of beauty pageants. I’ve loved them for years. I can understand all the arguments against them—that they are sexist and disgusting to some people. However, from a very objective perspective, these pageants only serve to entertain.

My, how times have changed. Beauty queens have been delivering trite and sometimes incoherent final answers for decades; but now, thanks to the internet, people who don’t normally watch pageants have access to some of these displays of cognitive dysfunction. The following clips were all inspired by Lauren’s . . . what’s the phrase . . . brain fart? Yes, brain fart!

Flipping Out Montage

I put together a fun little clip for fans of Bravo's new reality show Flipping Out. The name of the song is My House by Tom Novy. Enjoy!

Who's That (Bravo) Girl?

Ok, I came across a clip of Julie Brown and I just had to post it. Remember her? She had her own show on MTV in the 80s; it was called Just Say Julie. The woman was hilarious; she's a great comedic talent. Sadly, Julie never achieved the type of success she truly deserved. Anyway, below is a clip of Julie's parody of the infamous film/documentary Truth or Dare. Julie played Medusa, a Madonna-like singer who describes herself as being a slut with fame and lots of money. I saw this on MTV ages ago. So, as I watched it again a few minutes ago, I was surprised to see a very familiar face. Well, a younger version of a familiar face. Check out the clip.





Yep, it's our favorite comedienne.

Meme: Five Questions

I was tagged by one of my favorite bloggers. He’s prolific, generous, kind, intelligent, and the list goes on. Yep, I’m talking about everyone’s favorite amphibian, Sumurai Frog. The challenge was to answer 5 random questions, and here are my answers.

1. What is one place in your home country you'd like to visit but never have?
I’d love to visit Hawaii and learn more about the local culture.

2. What are your favorite smells?
I love the smell of pancakes, eggs, bacon, and other foods in the morning. There’s no better way to start the morning than by flooding one’s olfactory system with these wonderful odors. I also think the smell of a moderate amount of male sweat is attractive. Oh, some men just smell so good! I’m actually going write about this topic in the future.

3. What is a book that affected you deeply as a child?
I used to love the Hardy Boys. However, I’ve always enjoyed reading nonfiction books. I was particularly fascinated by European history and culture. I was a strange little boy.

4. Why will America never embrace soccer?
You know, I honestly have no idea. It’s just an American thing, I guess. We have a very distinct sports culture in this country that is undeniably American.

5. Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf?
Ok, let me just say that I love Elizabeth Taylor. She delivered an amazing performance as Martha in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf. I really have to see this film again. I regret not seeing the Broadway production in 2004. I believe Kathleen Turner played Martha. She must have been sensational.

Anyway, thanks for thinking of me, Samurai Frog. :)

Meme Fun

So . . . my dearest readers, would you like to know a little bit more about me? Shall I tell you about my love/hate relationship with the Spice Girls? Or maybe I should describe the day I became fascinated with JLo. It's a wonderful story. Wait, did you just say, "Marius, we don't give a crap about your personal life. Please just post pictures of various Bravo reality stars. That's all you're really good for"?

Well, tough luck! You're going to learn more about me whether you like it or not. Yes, I was tagged by the fabulous Ms. Place. And here are my responses to the following questions.

Four jobs I have had or currently have in my life:
1. Office Clerk (I worked for a very nice attorney as an undergrad)
2. Grocery Store Cashier (My boss was such a jerk)
3. Restaurant Assistant Manager (I was mostly in charge of the wait staff)
4. Graduate Research Assistant/laboratory manager (I’m currently a graduate student, and I run a Neuroscience research lab for a senior Scientist at a major University)

Four countries I have been to:
1. Canada
2. Mexico
3. United Kingdom (Next year!)
4. Netherlands (Next year!)
Note: I’m just as bad as George W. Bush. I know; very sad.

Four places I’d rather be right now:
1. New York City
2. San Francisco
3. Paris
4. London

Four foods I like to eat:
1. Beef Stew (My grandmother makes the best beef stew)
2. Chicken Mole with Spanish Rice (there are different types of sauces; I prefer black mole)
3, Italian Food (A good friend of mine from Sicily makes a Bucatini pasta in broth dish that’s just so delicious. She refuses to share the recipe, it’s been in her family for generations)
4. New England Clam chowder

Four people that I would like to tag:
1. Adam
2. Allison
3. Jinxy
4. Frogboots

The Simpsons Go To Paris. Finally!

I finally got around to creating my Simpsons avatar. I shall call him mini Marius. You can create your own avatar at the The Simpsons Movie website.



I haven't seen the movie yet, but the reviews so far have been generally positive. For example, veteran critic Roger Ebert gave the film three stars. Not bad. Anyway, Twentieth Century Fox is doing everything in its power to promote its new film. They even enlisted the help of the fashion community to help sell their film. Great idea! Here are a few images of Marge Simpson and family mingling with the fashion elite in a clever little piece for Harper's Bazaar. Of course, Marge needed a fabulous guide to help her navigate the complex world of high fashion in Paris. I'm pleased to announce that my favorite Canadian model Linda Evangelista graciously offered to assist them. Now, let's follow Linda, Marge, and the kids as they travel to Paris.

First stop, the streets of Paris.


Then, it's off to visit Donatella.


Next stop, the house of Chanel.


After chatting a bit with Karl Lagerfeld, they rush to meet with the one and only Jean Paul Gaultier.


Click here to view more pictures of Marge and Linda as they meet other fashion designers. Very cute!

Never Judge A Book By Its Cover (Top Chef 3, Reunion Special)

Bravo’s Watch What Happens special aired a few hours ago. It was nothing spectacular; Andy Cohen interviewed past and present Top Chef contestants. But I enjoyed seeing some past cheftestants talk about their experiences.

Ok, now let’s get down to business. I’m sure other bloggers are going recap the entire thing; so I’m just going to focus on two aspects of the show: tolerance and the importance of not judging a book by its cover! Please let me explain.

In most societies, it’s not easy being a fabulous harlot. Women of ill repute are often shunned by others. In some cultures, even a straight-laced gal who falls from grace one time can end up wearing a scarlet letter for life. It’s not easy being a whore.

I feel for these women. I really do. Out there somewhere is a prostitute with a heart of gold. Or a stripper who dutifully performs for disabled veterans. Or a desperate housewife who pays for her young gardener’s college education. I refuse to judge these women.

Anyway, at one point during the show, Andy read a comment submitted by a Bravo viewer.

How the hell can you cook anything with that Padma parading around. Christ, I’d eat anything off of her; I’d drink her bath water.

First, I was shocked to learn that heterosexual men actually watch Bravo. Interesting. The suits at Bravo sure knew what they were doing when they hired her. Yeah, sex sells. Anyway, at first, I was concerned for our Padma. For a brief moment, it appeared that Padma’s sexuality was on trial. Here’s the evidence.











It’s undeniable; our beloved Padma is asking for trouble. However, just when I had given up hope, an angel appeared on the screen. No, he wasn’t an angel, he was more like a deity—a gay deity with impeccable taste. It was my personal hero Tim Gunn. He said of Padma,

I love Padma’s style! Padma is who she is, and if risqué is the way she wants to be, risqué is how she should be. Padma, keep it up.

Then, fellow judge Tom Colicchio added,

In Padma’s defense, she’s not cooking in that kitchen.

While all this was going on, former cheftestant Sandee was jumping up and down like a teenage boy at a Jessica Simpson concert. She must have heard the news that Padma was leaving her husband. Oh, one can only imagine the types of thoughts that were in her head at that very moment.



Sandee immediately offered the object of her affection the following words,

She’s a pleasure when she comes in the kitchen . . . she comes in and it brightens our day.

How touching. Of course, Padma was allowed to speak in her own defense. She said,

It doesn’t matter; all I have to do on the show is think, speak, and eat; and I’m dressed perfectly for those three tasks . . . people don’t know this, but Gail’s actually much more, uh . . .

I’m the real slut is what she’s trying to say.

Finally, the truth was revealed. So, it turns out that Padma may look like a slut, but she’s really just a misunderstood beauty. Seriously, if she wanted, she could dress that way in Bollywood and still play an innocent virgin who saves herself for the right man. But, instead, she’s a reality star here in the States. And I think she’s doing us a favor. You know, I’d pay to see her dancing in one of those Bollywood dance numbers. Yes, I’d love that. Anyway, now we all know who the real whore is; don’t we, Gail?

This reunion special taught me many valuable lessons. The most obvious lesson is to never judge a book by its cover. But, the most important lesson of all is that we should be tolerant of everyone. Even harlots need a little love.

Kathy Griffin: Red-Headed Oprah

Fun With Doctor Who

Fun With The Jetsons

Fun With The OC

Hello, everyone. I'm back. I have so much to share with y'all. I'll get to that later. But first, I've posted a few clips inspired by the now famous episode of the OC that was parodied by the folks at SNL. I know, these are kind of old, but I still get a kick out of 'em. The first clip is the original episode. Enjoy!

By the way, I think I'm falling in love with Shia Labeouf. More about that later.

Eels, Fried Toes, and A False Testicle

Ah, Miami, so full of color, beautiful people, Latin rhythms, and all sorts of great stuff.



Yeah, I was all smiles as I sat on my sofa watching Top Chef on Wednesday. Well, the fine folks at Bravo somehow managed to change all of that. In fact, the show had a weird, negative vibe to it. Seriously, I started off with a smile on my face, but as soon as the show ended, I felt like I needed a hug (and some serious emotional support). Here are a few of things that made the show a tad weird/depressing:





The show started off with the cheftestants mingling in a room at Casa Casuarina, Gianni Versace’s former mansion. As soon as I found that out, my heart sank to the floor. Now, there’s nothing wrong with the place; it’s quite lovely. I’m talking about being reminded of Gianni’s untimely death. Yeah, what a sad story. Gianni was a great designer, and his life was cut short by some deranged killer. But, ok, we got to see clips of the mansion; so, that was nice. The Gianni thing made me a little less cheerful, but it was nothing major.


Then, we meet CJ, one of the cheftestants, and we learn a little more about him. Apparently, he’s a private chef and went that route because he was diagnosed with . . . cancer. And he has a false testicle. Fortunately, he’s in remission and seems to be doing just fine. However, things seemed to be getting more depressing by the minute. A few minutes earlier, I was reminded of Gianni Versace, and then I was reminded of a terrible disease like cancer; all of this within the first 10 minutes of the show. But I was fine, a lot less cheerful than before, but still fine.


After a less than impressive performance in the quickfire challenge, Clay, the Southern boy, talked about his father who was, according to Clay himself, a great chef. He wanted to make his father proud by winning the title of Top Chef. To be honest, I’m a sucker for that sort of thing. Then, Clay dropped the bomb—his father committed suicide. Talk about depressing, and if I had to guess, I'd say his father suffered from depression. It didn’t help that the camera kept following Clay around; I just knew this kid wasn’t going to last much longer. Ok, so the bad stuff just keeps getting worse: sad memories (Gianni’s death), cancer, suicide, and a Southern boy with an impossible dream. Could it get any worse?

Well, it didn’t get worse, but it certainly got . . . more interesting? The elimination challenge was something out of an Indiana Jones movie. Remember that one scene where a group of people are at a dinner table that’s embellished with snakes and even a monkey’s head at the center of the table. Ok, it wasn’t that bad; there wasn’t a monkey’s head in this episode of Top Chef, but I’m sure the producers thought about it. Anyway, for the elimination challenge, the cheftestants were asked to create a surf and turf entrée using proteins that most Americans would never even think of eating—snake, alligator, eel, and so on. I’ll stick with lobster and steak, thank you very much. I thought it was an interesting challenge, but that table looked like something straight out of Fear Factor. Seriously, I was expecting Joe Rogan to appear out of the blue. So, now, in addition to depressing memories, cancer, suicide, a Southern boy with an impossible dream, we add a whole table full of unappetizing raw proteins.

Ok, so maybe I was being a little too sensitive. The show wasn't that depressing. However, things in Bravo TV land have been quite depressing lately. Doug (Workout Season 2) passed away a few months ago, and that was sad. Kathy Griffin ended a bad marriage a few months ago, and we all know that her father died recently. I’m sorry, Bravo, but this is just too much. I’m not going to stop watching Bravo reality television; that was never an option, really. But I can only handle so much sadness and misery.

Fortunately, this episode of Top Chef wasn’t all sad memories and bad stuff. A lot of great and interesting stuff happened, too. And, there wasn't too much drama, which is usually a good thing. Right? It was all about the food.


Tom Colicchio never disappoints. As soon as he walked into that room at the Casa Casuarina, he summoned the cheftestants to gather around him like little school children eagerly awaiting instruction from a teacher. He reminded them that he is the head judge, which all of us know by now. Thanks for the reminder, Tom. You know, I’ve often wondered how many calories he consumes every season. Now, I love Tom; I really do. The guy is all man and he knows it. In fact, he adds some much needed masculinity to Bravo reality television. But Tom really needs to go to Los Angeles and get involved in Jackie Warner’s SkyLab project. We like our reality TV stars to be fit and trim. And standing next to Padma doesn’t make him look any better. Yeah, we’re shallow when it comes to that sort of thing.


Holy stereotypes! That’s all I can say. Clay, the Southern Boy with an impossible dream, brought his Southern charm, or whatever it is you want to call it, to the show. The best part was hearing him say, “I’m from Mississippi; pick it up and eat that son of a bitch. That’s the way I see it!” I’m sure his Southern drawl drove many Bravo viewers crazy. Some have probably never met a real, honest-to-goodness Southern boy. And, of course, what show would be complete without the stereotypical Italian-American. I must say, Joey wore his Italia shirt with pride. I suspect he doesn’t speak a word of Italian, but, hey, that’s none of my business. My favorite Joey moment was hearing him say, “I’m the biggest baddest mother fucker here, and I’m from New York. I came to kick ass.” Well said, Joey. Let’s hope you can live up to the hype.


And how lovely are the ladies this season? Ok, I left Sandee out. I’m sure she’s lovely in her own way, but she’s no match for Camille. I also like Sarah N. and Casey. Anyway, let’s hope these girls can really cook. Oh, I just noticed that I left out Lia; she’s also lovely. Sorry! However, the woman who really stood out this week was Micah. She’s one to watch. Of course, it’s too early to tell who the favorites are. But, honestly, I hope this year’s winner has two X chromosomes.


Hung! First, please get those dirty thoughts out of your head. Anyway, Hung is one confident (and obnoxious) man, almost as confident as his buddy Marcel. I can’t tell you how excited I am to have someone like Hung on the show. What would reality television be with the drama queen/instigator? Also, it appears that Hung is a pretty good chef. He certainly impressed guest judge Anthony Bourdain. It’s been suggested that Hung is this season’s gay villain. Please note that, according to Charlus, you don’t actually have to be gay to be the gay villain. And that actually makes a lot of sense.


So, the show ended with no real surprises. Tre won the elimination challenge and redeemed himself in the eyes of the judges. Hung came in a very close second. According to the judges, Tre’s dish (shown below) was very well executed, while Hung’s dish was excellent but lacked a little color.


There were some unforgettable moments. I loved Padma’s comment about how you could fry anything—even her toe—and it would taste good. Tom got a kick out of that comment. Anthony brought some fun to the table. He insulted the people of Cambodia and made a few snarky comments.

And, sadly, the Southern boy with an impossible dream was asked to pack his knives and go home. By then, I had already hit rock bottom; this just broke my heart even more. Thanks, Bravo! :( You know, clinical research has shown that depression in parents increases the risk of depression in their children. Suddenly, it seems like a bad idea to send Clay back home with a bunch of knives. We’ll miss you, Clay. Hang in there, partner!



For more Top Chef fun, please visit Blogging Top Chef.

Happy International Weblogger’s Day

So, one of my coworkers is driving me nuts. She’s a nice person and I can tolerate her most of the time, but she’s one of the laziest individuals I’ve ever met. Seriously, this girl doesn’t know the meaning of the word motivation. It’s a miracle she shows up to work fully clothed. Yeah, I had a terrible day at work. As Jinxy would say, I need a drink!

Anyway, enough of that. It’s time to celebrate International Weblogger’s Day! Yay! Yes, I was tagged by a lovely gal named Allison who maintains an awesome blog called Reality on Bravo. Stop by her site and show some love. She deserves it. Seriously, you can always count on Allison to do the dirty work for you. She posts all kinds of stuff about Bravo (e.g., recaps, pictures, and news). She knows it all.

So, I’m supposed to list five reasons I love to blog, and they are as follows:

1. I’m addicted to Bravo reality television. Yes, it’s true. It’s both a blessing and a curse. I watch Bravo TV whenever possible. My all-time favorite Bravo reality TV episode is the Project Runway Season 1 finale. Seriously, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen that sucker. Crazy! I just love sharing my thoughts about my favorite Bravo reality shows. And blogging lets me do just that.

2. I blog to keep in touch with family and friends. Actually, my mother, brothers, and some members of my extended family used to read my blog. Then, at some point, they just stopped. Ouch, that really hurts. Whatever. Apparently, they’ve got better things to do. Fortunately, I still have friends who read my blog. And, of course, I have to give credit to the person who inspired me to start blogging in the first place, and his name is Killervirgo. He’s a very good friend of mine—we met in Buffalo, NY and were college buddies back in the day (like 5 years ago?). Good times! Thanks for supporting my blog, Killervirgo. You rock! To my family, thanks for nothing. You’re so lucky I believe in unconditional love.

3. I blog because I’m a gay guy with something to say. Yeah, as a member of an often misunderstood minority group, I sometimes feel the need to share my thoughts and experiences with the world. And this blog has given me the opportunity to do that. I’ve also had the pleasure of reading other blogs that are maintained/written by gay men and women. It’s great to be in such good company.

4. I blog because it’s a great way to learn from others. Yeah, I love receiving feedback from other people. Everyone has their own unique perspective, and I try my very best to understand where people are coming from, so to speak. You’d be surprised; sometimes, one person’s comment can actually change my opinion about a topic. So, when people talk, I do listen. Well, that’s not entirely true; I usually ignore my annoying coworker, but I promise to listen to my readers and fellow bloggers.

5. I blog because it’s FUN! Yep, blogging about reality television and various aspects of pop culture is just plain fun! And that’s why I do this.

I apologize for posting this really late. Seriously, it’ll cease to be International Weblogger’s Day in less than an hour. Anyway, I’d like to thank Allison for thinking of me. So, now I have to tag five other bloggers. I know it’s too late to do this, but I’m going to do it anyway. I wish I could tag everyone one on my “It” list, but I can’t. So, I’d like to recognize the following blogs: And, You Are?, Dishin’ Dat, Damsel in Progress, Center of Gravitas, and Electronic Cerebrectomy. . . wait, I’d also like to recognize Jinxy, My New Plaid Pants, and Lazarus West (he was already tagged by Allison, but I have to recognize the great Laz). Anyway, I encourage all of my readers—all 5 or 6 of you—to visit these blogs. You can thank me later.

A Message From Sam Talbot . . .

. . . for the season 3 chefs.

Whatever you do; do NOT read the blogs. I repeat; do NOT read the blogs!

Sam, your words will probably fall on deaf ears. The first thing these young, eager chefs will do is run to their computers and google Top Chef Season 3. And those kids are in for a real treat. Let the bitchery begin.

Team Biatch 1: http://bloggingtopchef.blogspot.com/index.html
Team Biatch 2: http://www.amuse-biatch.blogspot.com/

Jane Fonda Rules

I have no idea why I subjected my eyes and brain to a film like Georgia Rule. It's possible that I just can't get enough of Jane Fonda. She's the main reason I decided to watch the film, really. I also had high hopes for Lindsay Lohan. I'm not a die-hard Lindsay fan--far from it, actually, but I acknowledge that the girl has talent. Also, the director, Garry Marshall, has directed some good movies in the past. So, I was optimistic that his newest offering would be entertaining. I had high hopes.

Well, so much for hope. I'm sure some people found this film entertaining. I was entertained at times. I particularly enjoyed seeing Dermot Mulroney on the big screen. Fonda and Huffman delivered good performances, and Lindsay was just . . . well, playing herself. Seriously, I'd appreciate a little effort next time, Lindsay. Anyway, for the most part, this film felt like a complete waste of time. It deals with a controversial topic that requires special handling. In fact, if handled just the right way, the results could have been very different. Marshall was clearly in way over his head with this project.

Fortunately, there is some good news. Jane Fonda appeared on different talk shows to promote her new movie. Yes, thanks to Georgie Rule, we get to see more of Fonda for a few weeks. Below is a clip of Fonda on the Colbert Report. Priceless!

Miss Universe 2007: You Decide

The Miss Universe 2007 pageant is days away. And I predict Rachel Smith, Miss USA, will win the crown. Click here to find out why I think Rachel will go home victorious. So, who do you think deserves to win the coveted Miss Universe crown?

Do you have a favorite Miss Universe 2007 delegate? Vote for your favorite delegate here!
	Micaela Reis, Miss Angola
	Natalia Guimaraes, Miss Brazil
	Ning Ning Zhang, Miss China
	Eileen Roca Torralvo, Miss Colombia
	Massiel Taveras, Miss Dominican Republic
	Viktoria Azovskaja, Miss Estonia
	Doukissa Nomikou, Miss Greece
	Puja Gupta, Miss India
	Valentina Massi, Miss Italy
	Riyo Mori, Miss Japan
	Honey Lee, Miss Korea
	Rosa Maria Ojeda, Miss Mexico
	Anna Theresa Licaros, Miss Philippines
	Uma Blasini, Miss Puerto Rico
	Tatiana Kotova, Miss Russia
	Megan Coleman, Miss South Africa
	Natalia Zabala Arroyo, Miss Spain
	Rachel Smith, Miss USA
	Ly Jonaitis, Miss Venezuela
	Other
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Thanks for your participation.

CLICK HERE TO MEET THE DELEGATES (VIDEO)!

Spider-man 3, Symbiotic Organisms, and Kelp Shakes

Beware of Spoilers!

A lot has been said about Sam Raimi’s Spider-man 3—too many villains and subplots, as well as other problems. Yes, I think most would agree that Spider-man 2 is far superior to Raimi’s third Spidey film. And, as some have suggested, that isn’t surprising; how do you top Spider-man 2? Personally, I don’t think the film was a total disaster. I wasn’t blown away, but I was entertained. Anyway, I’m not going to repeat what others have said about the film. Instead, I’d like to talk about . . . hair! No, I’m not kidding.

In Spidey 3, Peter Parker comes into contact with some black substance from outer space. What is it? I have no idea. As MarryAnn Johanson would say, it’s just comic book science. I guess we don’t question this sort of thing. Anyway, this symbiote wraps itself around an unsuspecting host and turns it black (of course). It also seems to influence the host’s personality (and not in a good way). Yep, Peter wears his new black suit and loses himself in the process. He flirts with the dark side and does some pretty nasty things to his friends. So, I guess this symbiote increases aggression, decreases inhibitions, and makes the host act like an asshole. The dark side is one scary place.



Now, let’s talk about hair. Yes, the first thing Peter changed was his hair style. It was kind of silly, but it makes total sense. As Peter Parker, the good boy, he would usually go with a pretty traditional style—looks a lot like the Princeton, a very clean-cut look that screams White Boy. Ah, but the Princeton is not appropriate for the dark side. No! Peter needed a drastic change that would coincide with his new (evil) persona. So, he went with . . . bangs?!? Hm, I guess that’ll work. Maybe it’s comic book science. Who knows?

Tobey McGuire’s character isn’t the first person to venture into the dark side. In 1963, Jerry Lewis starred in the delightfully entertaining film The Nutty Professor. This movie was great. Lewis delivered a great comedic performance, and Stella Stevens was perfect as Miss Purdy.



In the movie, the clueless chemist, professor Kelp, created a potion that completely changed him from a nerdy scientist to an attractive playboy (Buddy Love). Interestingly, his little potion also made him a good dancer and musician. So, the symbiotic organism from outer space makes you an asshole, but Kelp’s wacky potion does that and more! I’d like to order a Kelp shake please, but go easy on the asshole. As in Spidey 3, Kelp’s transformation wasn’t complete without a new hair hairstyle. Kelp’s hair was clean-cut and natural; it was the kind of style preferred by conservative business men in the 60s (or so I've read). Buddy Love, on the other hand, loves hair products. His hair style was a classic taper that was messier, more modern. Honestly, it wasn’t much different, but it was effective. We got the point: Buddy Love is a bad ass.

Musicians are just as vulnerable as actors. Garth Brooks also flirted with the dark side (check out his pic).



In the late 90s, this Country Music Superstar decided to release an album as his alter-ego Chris Gaines. Yep, before Peter Parker experimented with bangs, Garth had been there and done that. I’m not sure what possessed him to attempt such a bold career move. Was it some black substance from outer space? Or one of those awesome Kelp shakes, perhaps? I have no idea. I’m sure his fans were just as puzzled as I am to this very day.

So, I guess the take home message is never underestimate the power of (superficial) change. When we’re getting ready to go out to a club, bar, social event, or whatever, we usually dress to impress. Some people spend hours in front of the mirror trying to achieve the perfect “look.” In our minds, that “look” conveys a message. Some people want a style that says, “hi, I’m single and looking for action.” Other styles convey a different message, “hi, I’m responsible and intelligent; please give me a raise.” Of course, these changes are superficial, and, most of the time, our behavior stays pretty much the same. To an outside observer, a hairstyle change doesn’t seem to do much. However, to the person who styles his or her hair before some important event, a change can energize and sometimes change our disposition. By the way, I’ve experimented with bangs and still do from time to time! But don’t worry; I usually go with a Ceasar or my version of the Princeton. I rarely go the dark side.

A Gold Star for Tabatha

One can only imagine what it was like the day Tabatha, one of the stylists on Shear Genius, was born in the city of Surfers Paradise, Australia. She probably developed at an unusually fast pace and hated other children her age. Poor Tabatha probably grew up hearing her mother say the same phrase day after day: “stop making the other school children cry.” It must have been hard growing up with an ego the size of neighboring New Zealand.

Tabatha eventually left Australia and ended up in . . . New Jersey? Hm, yes, that appears to be the case (according to tvbuddy.com). Anyway, Tabatha currently owns a salon and travels all over the world as a stylist for Joico International. She had it all, but Tabatha wanted more. As mentioned before, she is a stylist on Bravo’s new reality show Shear Genius.

Now, I don’t have to preach to the choir. Tabatha is a force to be reckoned with. Tyson, that silly, silly man, tried to bring her down, but he did not succeed. Tabatha laughs in the face of danger. She doesn’t seem to experience basic emotions like compassion and fear. No. She is a diva! Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to announce that Tabatha has earned a gold star and the title of “coolest Australian on American reality television.” Here at Blog by Cosmo Marius, a gold star is reserved for all that is great in this world. Congratulations, Tabatha. You deserve this recognition and more.



Before moving on, please note that Tabatha is not deformed. I repeat, she is not deformed. I inadvertently erased one of her ears. Sorry, I'm still learning how to use photoshop. Anyway, my dearest Tabatha, there’s more. Please accept the adulation from your compatriots.


Olivia Newton-John, you must bow down to the great diva. And, yes, “she’s the one that you want.”


Hugh Jackman, you, too, must bow down . . . and feel free to take off your shirt at any time. That type of behavior is encouraged here at Blog by Cosmo Marius.


Nicole Kidman, you know the routine; please bow down . . . and maybe you can learn a thing or two from Tabatha.


Paul Hogan, please take off your hat and bow down . . . Hm, I wonder what Paul Hogan is up to these days.


I want to make it clear that no creature is exempt. Even the notorious dingo must bow down . . .


All the kangaroos that roam the great Australian continent must also bow down . . .


The adorable koala must also bow down . . . Seriously, how cute are these little guys?

Ok, I think you get the picture: I want Tabatha to win! I’ll conclude this ass kissing session with a picture of Tabatha. She’s one tough cookie, and that’s why I like her.



Give ‘em hell, Tabatha.

Fun with TV: Ugly Betty and the Cuchi, Cuchi

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it appears that Salma and America had a terrible fight on the set of Ugly Betty. Salma went crazy and started firing people left and right. Bad move, but Salma is one smart cookie. She managed to find replacements. Betty White will play Ugly Betty; Erik Estrada will play Betty’s father; and Charo will play Betty’s sassy sister.



Ok, that’s not really true. I just needed some fictitious story to go along with this picture. The real story isn’t quite as scandalous. In reality, Charo, Erik, and Betty were invited to participate in a small skit for the 2007 TV Land Awards. Oh, but I would love to see Charo on Ugly Betty. You can’t go wrong with the cuchi, cuchi.