Mario Lopez + Mark Consuelos = Muy Caliente

Ok, why didn't anyone tell me that Mario Lopez and Mark Consuelos made a movie together? I love them both. Below is a clip of the made-for-tv movie Husband for Hire, which aired on Oxygen a few days ago. I know what you're thinking; Marius, why in the world would you waste your time watching this crap? Oh, dear friends, when it comes to Mario and Mark, I'd endure anything--even a bad lifetime movie.




Ah, I love Mario Lopez so much, but this little clip left me wondering. Why is the choreography so bad? Why didn't Mario take off his shirt (and pants)? Why did they cast Mario Lopez, a Mexican American, to play a Puerto Rican? Is there a shortage of Puerto Rican actors? Anyway, I haven't seen this movie. But if I happen to stumble across it while channel surfing, I'm so going to watch it.

I Heart Tarkan (And My Blog . . . Oh, And My Readers Too)

Dear friends, I'm still alive. I've just been terribly busy. Anyway, my poor, little blog needs some love and nourishment (i.e., words and images). Therefore, I've decided to give it lots of love and a high dose of Tarkan, an amazing performer known as the Turkish Prince. I heart this man so much. Who cares if he claims to be a heterosexual! He and Ricky Martin aren't fooling anyone. But that's an issue to be discussed later. For now, let's enjoy Tarkan's new single, Vay Anam Vay.

Chris Hardwick Is Back

So, I'm excited. Yes! I found out a few days ago that Chris Hardwick will be hosting a new PBS program called Wired Science. According to their website, it premieres this Wednesday, October 3 at 8 PM. I assume most local PBS stations will air this program, and if they don't, you should call and give them a piece of your mind (and some money, of course). I can't wait.

Chris Hardwick used to host a show called Singled Out on MTV back in the 90s. At that time, MTV was just starting to morph into the strange thing it is today. Sorry, I just can't watch MTV anymore. In the 90s, MTV had a good mix of music videos, reality television, game shows, and lifestyle programs. My, MTV sure has changed. Anyway, Chris was great and he worked really well with Jenny McCarthy. Those were the days.

Well, Chris is back and better than ever. I've always been attracted to Chris. He's cute, funny, and, most importantly, intelligent. Here are a few clips of my beloved Chris promoting his new show. Enjoy!

I Heart Ryan

I have a lot to say about Flipping Out, a new Bravo reality show that's quite entertaining. I'll write about that later. For now, please enjoy these pictures of Ryan, Jeff's business partner and ex-boyfriend. God, I love gay men. Enjoy!

El Mundo De Top Chef (Top Chef 3, Episode 5)

Don’t worry; I’m not going to bitch and complain about this episode of Top Chef: Miami. I did that last week, but the Gods of reality television didn't hear my prayers. Yep, another woman was eliminated. Surprise, surprise. Anyway, in this episode, the cheftestants had to create something tasty using frozen pie crusts for the quickfire challenge. Dale’s reaction to the news was priceless.

Fuck you!

Oh, Dale, please behave. Actually, Dale considered this a great opportunity to redeem himself after a disappointing showing last week. He was quite confident with his final dish for the quickfire challenge—a spinach and salmon dish accompanied by a strawberry tart. He even stated that those two dishes were some of the best dishes he had made in the entire competition thus far. Well, Maria Frumkin, the guest judge, wasn’t impressed. She also didn’t seem to like Hung’s and Lia’s dishes. Oh, well, you can’t win them all. She was very pleased with Joey, Sara M., and Tre. However, she was most impressed by Joey’s trio of tarts. She even suggested that he had future in tarts. I loved how Joey looked into the camera and confessed that he had some experience making pastries, which he failed to mention to Maria. I’m sure Dale was pissed.



For the elimination challenge, the cheftestants were instructed to prepare Latin dishes for the cast and crew of Dame Chocolate, a telenovela that airs on Telemundo. Joey was all smiles; he described his reaction to this particular challenge,

I get excited . . . All hot Latina women . . . I get all happy.

Yes, Joey, I know exactly what you mean. We’ll get to that later. Anyway, the cheftestants were given $125 and 30 minutes to shop for ingredients and all that other good stuff. Some of them complained, of course, but everyone managed to buy all the necessary things. They were also told that they would have 3 hours to cook. However, Padma included an important caveat—the show’s schedule is constantly being adjusted. No one seemed to listen or they heard and just didn’t care.

In the kitchen, things were going smoothly until Tom walked in and announced that the lunch had been pushed up. The chefs’ time had been cut in half to 1 ½ hours.

Oh. My. God.

Oh, calm down, Brian. You always end up making some seafood dish anyway; I’m sure you can rely on one of your many recipes. Just put some salsa on it and I’m sure they’ll love it. I just have to say, Brian is the hottest chef in the kitchen. Hm, I think I should dedicate an entire post to him. Yeah, he deserves that. Ok, sorry, let’s move on.

As usual, Howie never works well under pressure. His sweat glands were on overdrive, and Ted had something to say about that in his blog. Seriously, I’d prefer a Howie dish without sweat as the key ingredient, thank you very much. Hung giggled uncontrollably as he talked about his Dish with Tom. Then he ran around the kitchen like a mad man with a knife in hand. He almost cut poor Casey who was busy making some kind of mole sauce that no one seemed to like.

Fortunately, the cheftestants finished their dishes, packed their things, and headed to the set of Dame Chocolate. As soon as they arrived, Joey and I were on the same page, so to speak. He was looking forward to seeing hot Latin women; while I was hoping to catch a glimpse of as many hot Latin men as possible, especially one of the biggest male soap stars in Latin America and the male protagonist in Dame Chocolate. Can you say Carlos Ponce? Yes, Joey and I were like bird watchers, waiting patiently for a glimpse of the ever elusive Latin hottie.

After the chefs set up their tables, some guy announced that it was lunch time, and the cast and crew made their way to the food. First, let me just say that I suspect that most of the people there were crew members. I didn’t see many ridiculously hot Latin women or men. Thanks a lot, Bravo. Then, just when I had given up hope, a mysterious woman approached Sara N’s table. Finally! A sexy Latin vixen! This histrionic woman had to be the show’s promiscuous she-devil. You know the one I’m talking about—the whore who sleeps with every rich man in town and tries to murder anyone who gets in her way.



Oh, wait, it was just Gail.



But, then, I spotted another lovely lady. Surely, she must play the part of the indigenous girl from a rural town in Mexico who moves to Miami in search of a better life (and love), I thought to myself. Then, I spotted a man with more rico suave than Ricky Martin. Hm, that must be Carlos Ponce or his chubby older brother, I wondered.



No, I was wrong again. The lovely indigenous girl was none other than Padma, and the rico suave guy was our very own Tom Colicchio.



Eventually, after what seemed like an eternity, Joey’s dream came true. He saw former Venezuelan beauty queen Natalia Streignard. Yep, this hot Latin woman is the real deal. Of course, there were other lovely ladies. And I’m sure Joey was very happy. I waited faithfully for Carlos Ponce, but he never showed up. Yeah, I was a little disappointed, but I was pleased to see some random hot Latin guy (probably a crew member); he was sitting next Gail. Muy caliente!



So, after Tom and Gail asked the cast a few questions like "who plays the bitch" and "have any of the women had sex with Carlos Ponce," everyone starts to talk about the food. They loved Sara M’s Chiles Rellenos, Howie’s Pork with Yuca Sour Orange Mojo, and Joey’s Bean Stew with Lobster. Most weren’t impressed with Hung’s Arroz con Pollo. Nope, not even Hung’s surprisingly good Spanish speaking skills could save him. Most agreed that Sara N’s Avocado Ceviche didn’t really qualify as Ceviche. Lia’s dish was also one of the least favorites, and Casey’s dish was a total miss.



Howie ended up winning the elimination challenge, and he graciously gave his prize, a bottle of Argentine wine, to his new bff Joey. That was really sweet. Of course, one of the chefs had to be eliminated. That’s the nature of the game. And the judges asked Lia to pack her knives and go.



You know, I really like Lia. It took a while, but she won me over with her professionalism and down-to-earth personality. She was never manipulative; she always spoke directly and honestly. She has earned my respect and admiration. It’s sad to see her go, but the show must go on. She offered the following words before she left,

I’m definitely going to keep on cooking. It’s what I love to do. I love being in a kitchen. I love food. I love feeding people; it’s fun!

Good luck, chef. We enjoyed watching you on the show.

The Barefoot Contessa (1954)

***This post contains spoilers***



I haven’t seen the film The Barefoot Contessa (1954) in years. The film stars the wonderful Ava Gardner and the legendary Humphrey Bogart. I was discussing this particular movie with a friend the other day because of Bogart. We actually started talking about the film Sabrina (1954) and how Bogart was perfect for the role of Linus Larrabee. Yes, 1954 was a great year for this very talented man.



Joseph Leo Mankiewicz, the writer and director of The Barefoot Contessa, created a film that was by no means original; it was essentially a Cinderella story with a tragic ending. However, I loved that he created a character like Maria Vargas (Ava Gardner), a dancer from Madrid who becomes an international star almost overnight.



I had issues with various elements of the film, including Ava’s performance. However, there is no question that she was perfect as Maria Vargas. She was sensational! The film is unconventional in a lot of ways. For example, it deals with sexual dysfunction and female sexuality, topics that, I’m sure, were rarely addressed on film in the 50s. Maria uses her beauty and star power to full advantage. Sure, the film sexually objectifies Ava’s Maria Vargas. But Maria is always in control of her sexuality, and it’s that freedom that leads to her death at the hands of a jealous husband.



Another great thing about the film was the participation of the Italian actor Rossano Brazzi. He played Maria’s husband, Count Vincenzo Torlato-Favriniin, in the film. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again; I love Mediterranean men. I found Brazzi’s performance quite effective.



Ah, Rossano, if only I had a time machine.

I'm Really Looking Forward To . . .

Oh, the suits at Bravo sure know how to please. I'm sure I speak on behalf of many gay men when I say, thank you, Bravo! Yes, there's a new reality show in the works called Flipping Out. Click here to meet the show's star, Jeff Lewis. You have my attention, Jeff.

Entertaining Deviants (D-List 3, Episode 5)

This episode of My Life on the D-List has to be one of Kathy’s best. Actually, this episode kind of felt like two; in the first half, she hosted the Gay Adult Video Awards, while, in the second half, she performed for two groups of prison inmates.



The show started with Kathy getting ready for a blind date. Ok, it wasn’t really a blind date; she knew who she was going out with. She had just never met the guy before. Who was the lucky fella, you must be wondering? It was Mike “The Mouth” Matusow.

I know what you must be thinking. Mike has to be a gay porn star. Nope! He’s actually a professional poker player. They call him the “The Mouth” because he talks a lot of trash at the poker table. Also, this guy has no game. When asked if he was familiar with Kathy’s work, he clumsily admitted that he had no idea who Kathy was. Kathy was upstairs and heard the whole thing. Then what did the idiot do? He went upstairs and told Kathy he was a big fan. Kathy immediately responded, “I just heard you say that you knew nothing about me!”

Yeah, Mike has no clue how to treat a lady. He actually said the following to Kathy’s mom,

Mom, I’m gonna take care of her. If she gets on my nerves . . . [almost kicks Kathy’s mom] right where it goes. I ain’t gonna take nothing from her

Maggie, Kathy’s mom, looked concerned. This guy needs a serious makeover and an attitude adjustment. Where are the fab 5 when you really need them? Oh, and I suspect he has adult ADD. Seriously, the guy couldn't sit still for one second.

Of course, Kathy loves putting herself in awkward situations. Fortunately, that little clip of Kathy and Mike lasted only a few minutes. Next, Kathy prepared for the Gay Adult Video Awards. She enlisted the help of her (straight) friend Eric who also happens to be a comedy writer. Perfect!



Ok, what is Kathy doing dating guys like Mike (and Ron Jeremy) when a guy like Eric is just a phone call away? Now, I’m not going to lie; I think Eric is a cutie. Of course, he’s probably married. Or, he may be in denial. Let’s face it; Kathy is like a gay magnet. Even her ex-boyfriend turned out to be gay. Anyway, she and Eric discussed material for her Gay Porn Award’s gig. Also, Eric asked her if all gay porn guys were gay. Well, Eric, there is such a thing as gay for pay. Are you interested? I’m just kidding. I don’t pay for sex. I do, however, tip strippers. Hey, they’re performers. Don’t judge me!

Moving on. Kathy was like a kid in a candy store during the Award’s ceremony. She was running a little late for the red carpet, but she made it and everything went as scheduled. The crowd just loved her and she rocked. I was quite impressed by Chi Chi LaRue. It’s no wonder she’s one of the top gay porn director’s in the states and maybe even the world. She’s a no nonsense kind of drag queen.

Yes, there were hot men all over the place, and Kathy had them all worshiping her every move. It was an interesting night.



There were, of course, some big names present. Michael Brandon “Mr. Monster Dick” was there and presented a few awards. Now, I can’t help but wonder—who comes up with these names? I acknowledge that his porn name is completely appropriate, but is that the best they could come upt with? Whoever came up with that name has to be the laziest person in the adult entertainment industry. What’s next? Mr. Big Balls? Sadly, Michael has no stage presence. He was such a bore.

You know, I figured that porn stars and pornographers were shallow individuals who only cared about making money and having lots of sex. But, this episode was all about breaking down stereotypes. Actually, it reinforced some stereotypes, while challenging others. For example, one guy said the following,

As far as I am concerned, everyone one of you in the gay porn industry is doing God’s work

Amen! Ok, wait, who is this guy and what the hell was he talking about? I have no idea. However, he seemed really serious. Maybe he was talking about the importance of promoting gay male sexuality; or perhaps he was just praising his fellow pornographers for providing a service to the gay community. Of course, he could also be crazy. That’s a possibility if you consider that the words (gay) porn and God don’t belong in the same sentence.

And just when we thought things couldn’t get any stranger, some guy offered the following,

I need to thank the countries of Lebanon and Israel for being strong neighbors, and hopefully one day there will be peace there

I’m with Kathy; who knew? Seriously, people in the gay porn industry are just as concerned about important issues as the rest of us. Bless their hearts.



Savanna Sampson won the award for best non-sex performance. Apparently, this is really an “acting” award. Now, I don’t know who Savanna is, but I think I like her. She got on the stage, accepted her award, and didn’t look the least bit overcome with emotion. She was just there to have a good time. I’m sure Savanna knows her real place in the universe. And Tom’s reaction was priceless.

Finally . . . a female porn star

Yes, the event was a huge success for Kathy and she was given the very first Naked Swordsman Award. Nice! I wonder if she’ll be adding that to her resume.



The second half of the show had plenty of humor and fun, but it also offered a very serious topic—the reality of life behind bars. Kathy was touched by a group of female inmates who shared their life experiences with her. She held back the tears while talking to them, but the minute she stepped outside with her assistants, she couldn’t hold them back any longer. The best part was seeing the prisoners respond so positively to her performance. I was kind of expecting her to bomb, but she was a hit with both male and female inmates. Good for her.

For more information about My Life on the D-List and other Bravo shows, visit my friends over at the Bravissimo Blog and Reality on Bravo.

Fun With The OC

Hello, everyone. I'm back. I have so much to share with y'all. I'll get to that later. But first, I've posted a few clips inspired by the now famous episode of the OC that was parodied by the folks at SNL. I know, these are kind of old, but I still get a kick out of 'em. The first clip is the original episode. Enjoy!

By the way, I think I'm falling in love with Shia Labeouf. More about that later.

All About Ted Allen

My heart rate increases every time I hear the name Ted Allen. Ted, as most of you should know, is a member of the Fab 5. He was the food and wine connoisseur. Before joining the institution that is Bravo Reality Television, he was a contributing editor to Esquire magazine. He’s also a successful writer and food critic. This man can do it all.



I’m not going to lie; Ted is hands down my favorite of the 5 Fab. I actually like four of them and . . . tolerate the other one. Let me explain. Kyan Douglas is the hottie of the group, and you all know how I feel about attractive men. Come on. He’s the health and beauty expert. And that raises a few interesting questions. Why wasn’t he invited to participate in Shear Genius? Why did they have to import a queer from Denmark (i.e., Rene)? Seriously, Rene struggled to deliver his lines and some have suggested that he has a speech impediment. Now, I’m not complaining. Rene was fun to look at. However, I’m sure Kyan would have saved the production team a lot of time and money. Also, to be honest, Kyan is more my type than Rene, which is totally irrelevant because Bravo doesn’t create shows specifically for me. I was just sayin’. I also find it interesting that they never invited Jonathan Antin to be a guest anything on Shear Genius. That would have made me very happy.

Do I even need to tell you all that Carson Kressley was the best thing about Queer Eye? I think that’s a given. This man is comedic gold. The show would have been so boring without him. Thom Filicia was the interior design specialist. He seems like a nice guy, but he never really wowed me in any way. He was just there doing his thing, which is cool. I like him, just not as much as I like the other three. So, now we’re down to the last man—Jai Rodriguez. Apparently, he was the “culture vulture,” a cultural expert of sorts. Whatever. I’m sure he’s a very talented actor. However, I would have preferred a more cultured individual. Seriously, they couldn’t find someone a little more qualified? Is there a shortage of cultured gay men in New York City or other major U.S. cities? How about Copenhagen? Maybe they should have just asked Ted to wear two hats on the show—culinary expert and cultural know-it-all. I’m convinced that Ted can do anything. Now, to be fair, I’m sure some people love Jai, and the producers probably saw something special in him. Why else did they even consider him in the first place? I was just never crazy about him, and I've explained why. Sorry, I’m just being honest here.

Now, let’s get back to the task at hand: praising Ted Allen. Yes, this blog is officially in love with Ted. He’s just a great representative of the modern gay man in this country—cultured, sophisticated, intelligent, and so on. That’s not to say that he’s the best (and only) representative. The gay community is very diverse, and everyone has a purpose and contributes something, but I just adore Ted Allen.




Fortunately, Ted is one of the judges on Bravo’s hit reality show Top Chef Season 3. Ted will join Tom, Padma, and Gail. And that just makes me so happy. We’ll get to see Ted every Wednesday. Thank goodness for Bravo. Also, if you’re a fan of Top Chef and/or Ted Allen, I encourage you to visit three very cool blogs: Dishin’ Dat, Blogging Top Chef, and Top Chef 2: They Cook, We Dish. These blogs will provide you with recaps, commentary, and lots of bitchery. It’s wonderful.

I guess you could consider this my first Top Chef 3 post. Yes, I’ll be blogging about this great show at least once a week. I won’t be doing full recaps, just commentary on various aspects of the show. I may dedicate a few posts to the magnificent Ted Allen. Hey, someone had to replace Tabs and Sally. And Ted is that someone!

Crazy About Raúl

I'm sure most of you are watching the Tony Awards as I post this. Of course you are. How silly of me to suggest otherwise. It's about to end soon, actually. Anyway, the performances have been great so far. It kind of makes one envy those who live in the big apple--those lucky bastards. Well, I've always had my eye on one particular performer, Raúl Esparza. He lost the Tony Award for best performance by a leading actor in a musical to David Hyde Pierce. Now, even though I was kind of rooting for Raúl, I'm actually glad David won. He's such a good performer. However, this post is all about Raúl. I always enjoy seeing him perform on television; I haven't had the opportunity to see him perform live, which is a shame. Yes, this Cuban-American hunk is such a great talent. Below are a few pictures of Mr. Esparza and a little clip from the Broadway musical Company. I think I'm in love. Enjoy!

A Story of Two Disillusioned Characters

I had a (heated) discussion with a friend the other day about The Office, an American remake of the original BBC comedy of the same name. I acknowledged that the American version is entertaining, thanks in large part to Steve Carell and a great cast. However, it is no match for the British version. My friend disagreed with me whole-heartedly. He just loves the American version and didn't quite enjoy the British one. Yes, the American version looks better and moves at a much faster pace, and, of course, it’s written with an American audience in mind. So, I guess I can understand why my friend and others prefer the American version. I, on the other hand, believe that nothing can top the BBC original.

Anyway, the one thing I love about both versions is the intelligent, rebellious, and unmotivated character that terrorizes one of his coworkers and fantasizes about the receptionist. Yep, I’m talking about Jim Halpert and Tim Canterbury.

Martin Freeman plays Tim Canterbury in the original series. Freeman is perfect as Tim. I sometimes question whether he’s even acting, but his performance is spot on. The show feels like a documentary, and Freeman works so well in that type of scenario. He’s cute, charming, and rebellious. I just love his scenes with Mackenzie Crook.



John Krasinski plays Jim Halpert in the American version. First, let me just say that I love John in this role. Krasinski is a bit more aggressive in his portrayal of Jim, but it’s still an effective performance. Interestingly, he retains some of the important traits of Tim Canterbury, but there are some big differences as well. Krasinski is taller, more attractive (I think), and younger than Martin Freeman, which make it a lot easier to love Jim Halpert.



Yes, I think John Krasinski is one hot disillusioned employee. I find him more attractive than Martin Freeman, who I think is cute in his own right. However, my all-time favorite man in this type of role is Ron Livingston in the movie Office Space. So, I hope you enjoyed these pictures. I’ll leave you with a video of both characters—Jim and Tim. God, I love these men!

Workout Reunion Special: Cause for Pause

First, I have to acknowledge that I’ve been neglecting to write about the Workout reunion special. Charlus over at Amuse Biatch would liken this type of behavior to child neglect. However, this child—the world of Jackie’s Sky Sport and Spa—is far from vulnerable and defenseless. Jackie Warner and her trainers have chiseled bodies and (very) healthy egos. Let’s just say these kiddies don’t need, nor do they want, any type of parental figure watching over them. Anyway, at the beginning of the reunion special, Andy Cohen asked Jackie an interesting question,

“When you watched your relationship with Mimi on the show last season, did it give you cause for pause?”

"Jackie responded, “Yes . . . the camera is a mirror."

So much happened on the show this season; seriously, we paused more times than I can remember. This season had it all—the good and the bad.



Reunions are usually supposed to be . . . warm and fuzzy. Of course, you’ll always have some obnoxious person who tries his or her best to spoil a lovely evening, but, for the most part, people are just happy to see old friends and acquaintances. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen here. As others have pointed out, Jackie appeared very distant and a bit stand-offish. She seemed somewhat indifferent to the fact that her trainers (friends?) were in the studio. Very interesting!



The one thing that really caught my attention was Jackie’s response to the “Jackie Gone Wild” clip. Andy mentioned that some straight women seem to be attracted to Jackie, and he asked her how she felt about that. Jesse offered the word powerful. And, without hesitation, Jackie agreed and added, “extremely powerful.” Is the addition of that adverb really necessary? We get the picture—making out and having sex with women left and right makes you feel POWERFUL (and adding the adverb extremely is just asking for trouble)! What exactly did she mean? Are women prizes to be won? A type of currency? Another notch on the proverbial belt? Who knows! To be honest, I shouldn’t really judge; I’m guilty of posting pictures of hot men and gorgeous women. Let’s face it; attractive people are fun to look at. I just find it interesting that Jackie would use that phrase to describe her feelings about women. Maybe that explains her odd behavior during the reunion special? Her brain must be masculinized to the point where forming strong relationships with others is close to impossible. I feel bad for Rebecca.





Clearly, I’m a huge fan of this show for various reasons. Although I don’t always agree with Jackie, I admire her strong work ethic and success. She is a smart business woman who knows what she wants and works hard to get it. She’s a great role model for gay men and women everywhere. Doug was also one of my favorites. Yeah, at first, I was seduced by his looks, but it became clear that he was more than just a pretty face with big muscles—he was a kind, gentle soul who reached out to others. While Jackie was busy adding more notches to her belt, Doug was offering hugs and advice to friends and clients in need. Allison over at Reality at Bravo thinks that focusing on Doug’s death was not respectful. I understand where she’s coming from. Using a tragedy like this for ratings is deplorable. However, I think the producers handled the whole situation very well. In fact, I was very pleased they shared glimpses of his life with us. He was a great human being. I’m not going to lie; Jesse ruffled my feathers from time to time. But, there’s a little place in my heart for Jesse Brune. He’s such a cutie. Sure, he’s often judgmental, at times immature and impulsive; but I think he’s a good person. Remember, no one’s perfect. At least Jesse is cognizant of his behavior, and that earns him extra points in my book.



Brian Peeler had me at hello. This southern hunk may suffer from occasional delusions of grandeur, but he has a beautiful heart. His love for Doug was truly touching. I guess there’s hope for straight men after all.

Spider-man 3, Symbiotic Organisms, and Kelp Shakes

Beware of Spoilers!

A lot has been said about Sam Raimi’s Spider-man 3—too many villains and subplots, as well as other problems. Yes, I think most would agree that Spider-man 2 is far superior to Raimi’s third Spidey film. And, as some have suggested, that isn’t surprising; how do you top Spider-man 2? Personally, I don’t think the film was a total disaster. I wasn’t blown away, but I was entertained. Anyway, I’m not going to repeat what others have said about the film. Instead, I’d like to talk about . . . hair! No, I’m not kidding.

In Spidey 3, Peter Parker comes into contact with some black substance from outer space. What is it? I have no idea. As MarryAnn Johanson would say, it’s just comic book science. I guess we don’t question this sort of thing. Anyway, this symbiote wraps itself around an unsuspecting host and turns it black (of course). It also seems to influence the host’s personality (and not in a good way). Yep, Peter wears his new black suit and loses himself in the process. He flirts with the dark side and does some pretty nasty things to his friends. So, I guess this symbiote increases aggression, decreases inhibitions, and makes the host act like an asshole. The dark side is one scary place.



Now, let’s talk about hair. Yes, the first thing Peter changed was his hair style. It was kind of silly, but it makes total sense. As Peter Parker, the good boy, he would usually go with a pretty traditional style—looks a lot like the Princeton, a very clean-cut look that screams White Boy. Ah, but the Princeton is not appropriate for the dark side. No! Peter needed a drastic change that would coincide with his new (evil) persona. So, he went with . . . bangs?!? Hm, I guess that’ll work. Maybe it’s comic book science. Who knows?

Tobey McGuire’s character isn’t the first person to venture into the dark side. In 1963, Jerry Lewis starred in the delightfully entertaining film The Nutty Professor. This movie was great. Lewis delivered a great comedic performance, and Stella Stevens was perfect as Miss Purdy.



In the movie, the clueless chemist, professor Kelp, created a potion that completely changed him from a nerdy scientist to an attractive playboy (Buddy Love). Interestingly, his little potion also made him a good dancer and musician. So, the symbiotic organism from outer space makes you an asshole, but Kelp’s wacky potion does that and more! I’d like to order a Kelp shake please, but go easy on the asshole. As in Spidey 3, Kelp’s transformation wasn’t complete without a new hair hairstyle. Kelp’s hair was clean-cut and natural; it was the kind of style preferred by conservative business men in the 60s (or so I've read). Buddy Love, on the other hand, loves hair products. His hair style was a classic taper that was messier, more modern. Honestly, it wasn’t much different, but it was effective. We got the point: Buddy Love is a bad ass.

Musicians are just as vulnerable as actors. Garth Brooks also flirted with the dark side (check out his pic).



In the late 90s, this Country Music Superstar decided to release an album as his alter-ego Chris Gaines. Yep, before Peter Parker experimented with bangs, Garth had been there and done that. I’m not sure what possessed him to attempt such a bold career move. Was it some black substance from outer space? Or one of those awesome Kelp shakes, perhaps? I have no idea. I’m sure his fans were just as puzzled as I am to this very day.

So, I guess the take home message is never underestimate the power of (superficial) change. When we’re getting ready to go out to a club, bar, social event, or whatever, we usually dress to impress. Some people spend hours in front of the mirror trying to achieve the perfect “look.” In our minds, that “look” conveys a message. Some people want a style that says, “hi, I’m single and looking for action.” Other styles convey a different message, “hi, I’m responsible and intelligent; please give me a raise.” Of course, these changes are superficial, and, most of the time, our behavior stays pretty much the same. To an outside observer, a hairstyle change doesn’t seem to do much. However, to the person who styles his or her hair before some important event, a change can energize and sometimes change our disposition. By the way, I’ve experimented with bangs and still do from time to time! But don’t worry; I usually go with a Ceasar or my version of the Princeton. I rarely go the dark side.

The Idea of Touch and Group Dynamics

I attended a friend’s art exhibition last night and was pleased to see many familiar faces. My friend, a young artist, greeted me at the door of the art gallery; he was visibly excited and anxious. Who wouldn’t be? After engaging in a little small talk for 20 minutes or so, I walked into the gallery to enjoy the fruits of his labor.

Large Jar
Korean Yi Dynasty (17th Century)

For most people, deciding what is beautiful or artistic happens in a matter of milliseconds after seeing some object; seriously, it’s almost an automatic response. We often find if difficult to articulate why we like or loathe something. Experiencing art is, of course, a very subjective thing. Our perception of objects (or ideas) is influenced by past experience and present motivational state.

My friend was exploring the idea of art that could stimulate (the senses and mind), without actually coming into contact with the body’s sensory structures. For example, some pieces seemed to resemble chewing gum and similar objects; I guess the observer was supposed to imagine how the object would feel in his or her mouth. Other objects were created to stimulate our touch receptors—or, the idea of touch, as we couldn’t actually physically touch the objects. His use of rich textures and familiar fabrics was very effective.

After the exhibition, a group of us wined and dined at a nice little restaurant that wasn’t too far from the gallery. It was an interesting mix of people. After dinner, we headed to an “upscale” bar. Most of us were academics, artists, musicians, and writers. Actually, there was only one writer, a young woman from California. Gay men were very well represented. As I enjoyed the company of my friends, acquaintances, and a few new people, I noticed a few things.

First, my friends and I have been through this whole routine many times before. Most of us are in our late twenties and early thirties, but there are a few people who are in their late thirties. We attend these types of events on a regular basis—various art shows, music recitals and concerts, and so on. In fact, I’m a member of a choral group. We perform about three times a year (yes, I have to wear a tux), and my friends are always there to support me and the chorus. It’s interesting that my friends and I have become very accustomed to this sort of thing. We seem to follow a similar script every time. We’ve become somewhat predictable, and the conversations are usually the same.

Thank goodness for young blood, those new individuals eager to become a part of our group. To be honest, we aren’t a perfect cohesive group. We’re more like a collection of like-minded people. Friendships seem to develop almost over night, and they die just as quickly. And there are times when I only hang out with a select few. I'm a reserved person. Some of the new people are younger. The exciting part is learning more about them and trying to establish some common ground. But there is no question that they are entering our world and must adapt to our particular rules and idiosyncrasies. Their ass kissing skills are quite impressive. It’s fun to watch them perform.

One of the newbies, a 24-year-old Latin guy, approached me at the bar. He told me about his life is Miami and a recent trip to Europe. He made a few silly comments, and I laughed when appropriate. I’m a good listener. As he talked, one thing came to mind: I wondered what it would be like to touch his body—his neck, a bicep, lips. Yes, the idea of touch can be very stimulating. The fun eventually came to an end; we hugged, exchanged numbers, and went our separate ways. God, I love Latin men.

Workout #7: Boys Will Be Boys

My goodness, there’s so much to blog about. A lot of stuff happened. I guess I’ll start by writing about the boys. Yes, in this episode of Workout, the producers did everything in their power to appeal to their gay male viewers. I love Bravo!

I’ll start by discussing Brian Peeler. I’m not going to lie; I like Southern men, and this hottie from North Carolina gets me all worked up. Of course, no one’s perfect. Peeler’s arrogance seems to rub people the wrong way.



In this episode, Jackie decided to take a few days off to visit her mom (more on that later!) and she left Brian in charge of the gym. I know what you’re thinking. Is this woman crazy? Maybe she is. Anyway, Brian appeared happier than Anderson Cooper at a Scissor Sister’s concert. It was cute and annoying, all at the same time.



Brian immediately changed his behavior—as do most men who are given some degree of power; he spent most of his time walking around the gym trying to look important (or sleeping in Jackie’s office). The women were a little taken aback by Jackie’s decision to leave him in charge. I loved Erika’s reaction to Peeler’s sudden change in behavior:

“Are you bored? And why are you lurking all over the gym?”

Good one, Erika! Good one! Surprisingly, Rebecca also delivered a few great lines. She said,

“if I had a bad child, I’d put them in charge a lot because something about being in charge makes you rise to the occasion. And you’re not as acting out . . . it’s like reverse psychology.”

Rebecca gets extra points for using her noggin, which is always a good thing.



Now, on to Jesse. He’s becoming one of my favorite trainers, and he never disappoints. In this episode, he was introduced to a client who happened to be a male “model.” Jesse was more than happy to take on this client, and he added a new title to his growing list of titles and accolades. In addition to being the Lesbian Whisperer, he is now the Cardio King. This guy kills me!



So, his client eventually showed up wearing a tight black muscle shirt with the word COLT printed across the chest area. I couldn’t stop laughing when Jesse asked him what that meant. Oh, Jesse, you’re not fooling anyone. You know good and well what that stands for.



His new client explained that COLT was a studio that specializes in erotic entertainment (for gay men). And a few minutes after explaining this, he decided to take off his shirt. Jesse looked a little flustered, and his client noticed. That whole segment looked like something straight out of a COLT “film.” I loved when Jesse asked him for some photos.

After their hot workout, the guys had coffee at a nearby coffee shop. The “model” switched from porn stud mode to serious (gay man on a mission) mode. He talked about the difficulties gay men and lesbians face in the military. Jesse admitted that he had no clue what it was like to be in that kind of situation. And I think it’s great that this guy used his 15 minutes to talk about an issue that’s affecting many people in our community. I think it’s safe to assume he’s not a Republican, and thank goodness because I was starting to worry that all gay porn stars support the Republican Party. Thanks a lot Matt Sanchez.



The last few minutes of the show were really emotional. The group reacted to the sad news that one of their own, Doug, was not recovering from his illness; he was actually getting worse. All hope seemed lost; and we all know that there's no happy ending. I was really touched by Brian’s reaction. You could tell that he cherished his relationship with Doug. And I think it shows great character when a (straight) man let’s his guard down like that. He cried. Some may say that crying is a sign of weakness. My grandfather used to say that men don’t cry. Well, I think he and others who believe that are wrong. Sometimes we need to cry. It’s an often misunderstood part of our emotional repertoire. Extreme sadness and helplessness can be detrimental to our well being, but crying serves an important function. It’s a normal reaction to sad news. It’s part of our coping strategy. And it’s a beautiful thing. As I watched the trainers react to the sad news, their tears made one thing very clear: Doug Blasdell was a great human being, and he we will be missed.

Rene Fris is One Hot Scandinavian Man

I present to you the gorgeous Rene Fris. According to tvbuddy.com, Rene moved from Denmark to New York City in 1999. He's worked for some of the best salons in the country. And the rest, as they say, is history. He's currently the salon director (and judge) on Bravo's new reality show Shear Genius. As you can probably tell, I heart Rene. A lot! Oh, and how cute does he look in that Karate uniform? So butch! Hot!

Fashion Icons, Past and Present

About a month ago, TLC aired a program called The Greatest Fashion Icons in Film. Apparently, they got a team of experts to rank the most fashionable icons in cinema, and they also listed contemporary actors that resemble these iconic stars. I found some of these comparisons quite accurate. Or, at least, they felt right for some reason or another. For example, they compared Madonna to Marlene Dietrich. Good call!



To give another example, Leonardo DiCaprio was anointed the new James Dean by these folks. Ok, that makes sense.


Here’s Cary Grant and George Clooney. I can see it.


Of course, I didn’t agree with some of their comparisons. I cannot believe they likened Gwyneth Paltrow to Grace Kelly. I can see a few similarities, but these women are on different levels. Grace, of course, is a Hollywood legend, and Gwyneth is, um, a successful American actor. Yeah, she’s an Academy Award winning actor, but that doesn’t make her Grace Kelly.


I also don’t think Catherine Zeta-Jones is the new Elizabeth Taylor. Don’t get me wrong; Catherine is a beautiful woman, but she’s no Elizabeth Taylor.


I was ambivalent about most of their other comparisons. They declared Scarlett Johanssen the new Marilyn Monroe. Well, ScarJo does have some things in common with Norma Jeane (curves and breasts!), but she’s also quite different in a lot of ways.






Here are a few more pictures of other stars—Brigitte Bardot-Halle Barry and Greta Garbo-Hilary Swank.




For a more complete list visit the Cinefille Blog.

Timeless Beauty: Elizabeth Taylor

Thank goodness for TMC and AMC, two cable channels that show commercial-free classic movies. A few days ago, while channel surfing, I stumbled upon the 1951 Oscar-winning film "A Place in the Sun.” I hadn’t seen it in ages. I must say, Elizabeth Taylor is without question a Hollywood icon. What a stunning beauty. And Montgomery Clift is a great leading man.









Montgomery looks a little like Julian McMahon in this picture. Actually, I think it’s the other way around; Julian looks like Montgomery. Hot!

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are

“Out” magazine has ranked the top 50 most powerful gay men and women in America. And guess who’s on the list? Yep, it’s Anderson Cooper. As far as I know, Cooper hasn’t officially declared (or acknowledged) that he’s gay. I can just imagine the look on his face when he sees this magazine cover. He’ll probably turn to his partner, lover, trick, or whatever, and say, “why won’t the gay media just leave me alone? I hate those bitches!” Anderson, I’m sure it must be hard being hounded by the likes of Michael Musto. But you’re attractive, wealthy, and famous. Deal with it!

Here’s “Out” Magazine’s Top 10:

1. David Geffen
2. Anderson Cooper
3. Ellen DeGeneres
4. Tim Gill
5. Barney Frank
6. Rosie O’Donnell
7. The New York Times Gay Mafia: Richard Berke, Ben Brantley, Frank Bruni, Stuart Elliott, Adam Nagourney, Stefano Tonchi, and Eric Wilson
8. Marc Jacobs
9. Andrew Tobias
10. Brian Graden
(17) Perez Hilton
(23) Tom Ford

By the way, I’m a little shocked that Perez Hilton was ranked higher than my beloved Tom Ford. Who exactly created this list?

Mr. World 2007 (Update)

It appears that Juan Garcia, Mr. Spain, is no longer a favorite among bloggers and pageant aficionados. He was a favorite at one time, but many are losing interest in this hot Spaniard. I, on the other hand, think he’s great and wish him the best of luck.


Mr. Spain

Judging by comments on message boards and pageant blogs, Lucas Gil, Mr. Brazil, is still a strong contender. His biggest advantage is that he’s Brazilian. Seriously, I’m starting to think that contestants get extra points just for being Brazilian. However, most of his supporters are Latin women. It’ll be interesting to see if he can win over the judges. I have faith that he will.


Mr. Brazil

Some have suggested that Warren Harvey, Mr. England, has a shot at the title. He doesn’t really do it for me, but some people really like him.


Mr. England



Ok, I can see why people like him. Seeing him without a shirt does change one’s perspective. Yes, he has a very nice body, but, then again, so do many others. We’ll see if Warren has what it takes.

Harley Von Moger, Mr. Australia, is another young man who’s been getting a lot of attention lately.


Mr. Australia



Can Harley repeat what Jennifer Hawkins did at the Miss Universe pageant? I have my doubts, but I’m sure he’ll try his very best to win another international title for Australia. Good luck, mate.

Several bloggers and pageant aficionados have been talking about David Camenzuli, Mr Malta. At the outset, this beautiful man (from a small country) didn’t get as much media attention as some of his peers. In fact, I only mentioned him briefly in a previous post.


Mr. Malta



Now, the tables have turned. Mr. Malta won the fitness challenge, and everyone seems to think he has a shot at the title. I think they may be right. He has the looks of a male supermodel and a great (natural) body. He's also very photogenic. Let’s hope he does well on the big night.

I conclude this post with a few pictures of the contestants competing in one of the fitness challenges. These boys sure look like they’re having fun. Ah, to be an attractive man in the fascinating world of pageants.

Visit http://www.jurorno12.blogspot.com/ for more pics and updates.

300: Hypermacho and Homoerotic (I Love It)

Much has been said about Steven Snyder’s new film, 300. It was released a few weeks ago, but people are still talking about it. Most agree that it’s visually stunning.



Nathan Lee of the Village Voice described the film as both “homophobic and homoerotic.” And although many gay bloggers have complained about the homophobic remarks made by a few of the characters, one must not forget that this film is based on a graphic novel by Frank Miller. Honestly, what did you expect?



I enjoyed the film very much. Come on, who wouldn’t enjoy watching three hundred hot men on the big screen. The one thing I most enjoyed was that the director didn’t shy away from sex.



Ah, the love scene between the actors Lena Headey (Queen Gorgo) and Gerard Butler (King Leonidas) was great. The sexual intensity between those two was phenomenal.



The film also has its share of problems. First, it is not historically accurate. However, as stated before, it’s based on a graphic novel by Frank Miller and it’s made with a certain target audience in mind. I’m sure that audience couldn’t care less about historical accuracy. I also didn’t like the way the Persians were portrayed in the film. The Persians at that time had some great qualities. They allowed various subject nations to govern themselves. So, they did grant some freedom to defeated territories, which was rare during that time in history. This issue is considered more in depth by the folks at flimsktaler.co.uk.

Below is one more picture of the lovely Lena Headey. She’s my new favorite person for the next weeks. I should also mention that Gerard Butler will always have a special place in my heart.

Running with Coconuts

Mr. World 2007 is well underway in Sanya, China. It’s similar to Miss World. The men must first compete in various preliminary competitions to win a spot in the final. The first competition is the Sports Challenge. This task will test the men’s strength, stamina and determination. According to the Mr. World website, this challenge is designed to separate the boys from the men. I like the sound of that. Congratulations to David Camenzuli, Mr. Malta, for winning this very difficult challenge.



According to the website, David is a professional footballer. So it comes as no surprise that he is in excellent shape. In addition to being a great individual athlete, he managed to play well with others. The men had to participate in various team events like tug of war. And David was a great team player.



There were other individual and team events, but my favorite one is the Coconut run. Yes, the contestants had to dash from one side of the beach to the other with coconuts. Below is a picture of Mr. Dominican Republic showing us all how it’s done. By the look on his face, running with coconuts is no easy task.

Workout 2 Premiere: 100% Drama

The Season 2 premiere of Workout did not disappoint. As expected, there was a lot of drama. Within the first few minutes, Jackie Warner mentions that she has a new house in the Hollywood Hills. She also talks about Sky Lab, a new branch of Sky Sport and Spa. Her mission is to create a program that will help people lose weight. Jackie loves helping people, and that’s why the world loves her. Then, she mentions her (sick) relationship with Mimi. Oh, I can’t believe my ears. What is she still doing with that crazy woman? I think Laz may be right; Bravo is probably paying Jackie to keep Mimi around. This woman needs to just disappear!



Then it’s off to the beach. Jackie forces her trainers to participate in a “mini” boot camp. “Shirts off,” she yells at her less than enthusiastic staff. Jesse looks at her with contempt and slowly takes off his shirt. Why the hesitation? Well, his body reminds me of the Pillsbury Doe Boy. I can see why he would feel uncomfortable running around the beach alongside Brian and Doug, who are both HOT. Fortunately, Jesse claims to be “gay chubby.” It’s no big deal. Right? Earth to Jesse, you work for Jackie Warner; we expect you to have the body of a Greek God. Rebecca adds more negativity by bitching the whole time. Jackie was disappointed. I love when she snapped at Rebecca, “you’re bored the moment you get out of bed and the moment you go to sleep.” “I need constant stimulation,” Rebecca complains. Jackie responds with “life isn’t about constant stimulation.” You go, Jackie!

Gregg makes it clear that he is still interested in Zenn, but she’s not feeling the love. She’s 12 years his senior. Zenn knows better; younger men are fickle and horny—that’s a dangerous combination. Ellen K., Jesse’s new best friend, tells Jackie that Jesse loves to eat cookies and junk food. No one is surprised. Again, Earth to Jesse, you’re going to get fired if you don’t get with the program. Actually, Jackie is too sweet; she would never do that. I suggest she demote him to receptionist, or, better yet, have him clean toilets. Maybe that will teach him a lesson.



We see a touching scene between Doug and his ex-boyfriend, Cheo Useche, who suffers from Kidney failure. The goal is to get Cheo into tip top shape; hopefully, the kidney transplant will go well. It was quite moving watching Doug and Cheo sparring for a few minutes. They end the scene with a hug and a few tears.



There’s friction between Doug and Jesse. Apparently, it all sta