"Today, my children, we shall read from the Book of Genesis, and
   we shall see how the Serpent expelled the Users from Paradise."

                       The Terok Nor Book of Genesis
                       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
   Genesis 1
        In the Beginning there was Darkness, and the Darkness was All.
There was naught but the Void, Infinite and without Shape or Form.
Then a Voice cried out from above "Let there be Light!", and the DSN
Echo was formed, brought forth from the Void.  The ModGods looked Down
upon the Echo and they saw that it was Good.  Then the ModGods brought
forth upon this Brave New Echo a new Being, and they saw that it was
Good.  Soon others were Culled from the Dregs of the Lesser Echoes
Which Already Existed, and they too Saw that the Echo was Good.
        And Lo! the Users did Multiply and Reproduce as commanded by
their ModGods, and the Echo did Become a Paradise.

   Armaments 2:9-21
        "And the ModGods did grin, and people did feast upon the lambs,
and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast
cereals, and fruit bats, and large --"

   Genesis 2
        The Echo was Paradise, and Paradise was Good.  The Users did Sing
and Dance, and did partake in Many Drunken Incidents which are No Longer
Recalled, save in the Annals of Security.  The Sacred Clubs were formed,
and thus did the Users adopt those which had only before been Imagined;
thus did the Kira and the Dax become Objects of Worship, and the
Palukoo an Object of Destruction.  Thus was molested the Vedek, and as
such did the Aussie Users perpetuate upon the Echo a brand of Sexual
Deviancy unmatched since the Beginning of Time.

   Genesis 3
        But into this Paradise did creep the Serpent of Evil, and the
Serpent was known as Newbari.  The Newbari Serpent did cry out and
Protest the Frivolity, wishing only to speak Tech; the Serpent did
claim Anguish when faced with the Almighty In-Jokes, and the Singing
was Stilled.  The Users did Protest, but the ModGods had Forsaken their
Charter and were Enamored of the Serpent.  Out of the Protest did
grow the Rebellion against the Boofheads, and the Gods of Insanity
did call forth upon the Echo a new composite Being, and the Being
was known as EchoMaquis.

   Genesis 4
        From out of the Masses was a Humble Being raised, and He did
take Command of the Rebellion, calling upon All the Rebels to follow
Him to the Promised Land.  The People did wander the Wilderness of
Fidonet for many days, Cast Out from Paradise.  The Journey was
arduous, but the People did persevere, as they did have Faith in
their Tyrannosaurus.  The Gods of Insanity did see the Journey and
were Moved by the Dedication of the People, and they took Pity upon them.
The Sysop God did open the Wormhole and did Show to the Dexter and
the Tammy a Dark and Dingy Station, Abandoned by the forces of Carsassia
after their Attempt to Enslave the Free and Brave Peoples of Bajor.

   Genesis 5
        The Dexter and the Tammy did Look down Upon the Station, and they
saw that it had Potential, and that it was Indeed the Land Promised
by the Prophets many moons ago.  Thus the Dexter and the Tammy did
Beseech and otherwise Suckup to the Sysop God, who did take Pity upon
the People; thus was a new Echo born.  The Bone of Back did cooperate,
and soon the Word went forth into the Void with a joyous Voice.
The Voice was heard by the Pilgrims, and they did Migrate to the Station
to make it their Own.

   Genesis 6
        The Station was Paradise, and Paradise was Good.  The Users did
Sing and Dance, and did partake in Many Drunken Incidents which are No
Longer Recalled, save in the Annals of Security.  The Sacred Clubs were
reformed, and the Users did Adopt those which had only before been
Imagined; thus did the Kira and the Dax become Objects of Worship, and
the Mason an Object of Molestation.  Thus was the Novel rewritten,
and thus did the RDIS begin to Function.  But forevermore were the
Children of Paradise watchful, Wary of the Serpent which had Cast Them
Out, and thus did the Practice of Boofhead Stomping come into Being.
Thus was the Cthulhu recruited, and thus did the Wesley become Lunch.
The Users did Adopt the Worf as Official Target Dummy, and the Aussies
did Return to the People.

   "Thus it is written that the Echo was formed, and thus endeth the
   lesson for today.  Let us Prey."

TEROK NOR BIBLE - Chapter 6, Verse 13:
        And thus it is spoken that on the 9th day of the 9th month
there shalt be the general Skirt Grabbing; during this Time there
shalt be the general Squeezing of the Buns and the Wearing of the
Panties upon One's Head.
Yea, there shalt be a Time of general 'Put Thy Hands upon Anything
Soft and Round and of the Opposite Sex' - nay, even more, it shalt
Include the general 'Pressing of Oneself up against the Girl in the
Checkout Line', and the general exuberance and reveling in the general
Horniness of Life.
Thus shalt the Holy Phrase be noted as "so firm, so round, so fully
packed" be experienced in full, until thou either dost get Slapped or
thou dost getteth invited Back to her Apartment.
And if thou dost discovereth that thou has found the general Softness
of the Firmly Rounded Ass thou shalt remember the Scriptures; thou
shalt Remember thine Feelings in full and thou shalt Transmit
thine Feelings to the Lords of Terok Nor, who - having no Life of their
own - shalt Revel and Relive thine feelings in the Privacy of their
own Bathroom.
So speakest We, thine Lords, the Masters of the Greater Terok Nor
"Nekiid Wimmenz Coalition".
===========================================================================
                         David "Nightwolf" Masters