When Chinese need to vote, do they have erections?
So it's over. It is November 3, 2004 and George W. Bush has just won re-election. Firstly I want to confess that I was wrong. I thought that this would go to Kerry 279-259. It should end up 286-252 Bush. It may have been my natural pessimism or too much belief in some of the state polls, but I saw Ohio and Iowa going into the Democrat column. I wasn't all wrong. I never thought Bush would lose Florida (which he didn't) and I never fell for the popular idea that the so-called new swing states such as Pennsylvania or Minnesota would really swing (which they didn't). And a while back I suggested what the electoral map would look like with the three isolated blue islands of Democrat states floating on a sea of Republican red. (That is using the now popular Democrat Blue and Republican Red color scheme, which I think should be reversed. How can the party that is closest to socialism not be colored red?) Take a look at the map and see what I mean. You cannot drive from any of the blue areas without crossing a red one.
So this afternoon John Kerry gave his concession speech. Right off the bat he has more class than Al Gore. Not that Kerry's speech was any better that Gore's four years ago, but at least Kerry didn't unleash his hordes of lawyers on the good people of Ohio, Florida, Iowa and any other state unlucky enough to have been close. I managed to go to sleep only slightly earlier than in 2000, turning off the television at around 3:00 a.m. I managed to keep from watching the television coverage until almost 10:00 p.m. I did sneak a peak at the proceedings on the web most of the night. CNN's website was good. I was a little frustrated in how the networks were calling Kerry states pretty early and leaving the Bush states to twist in the wind. It's almost twenty-four hours later and almost all of the votes have been counted in Iowa and New Mexico and the networks still haven't called either of them for Bush. Ironically, the margin of victory for Kerry in Wisconsin is even more narrow, yet that was called before the night was over. I'm not surprised. Most still have Ohio too close to call. All the votes have been counted, the odds of Kerry gaining enough of the provisional votes to win is miniscule, John Kerry has conceded the race, yet it remained uncounted for Bush until well into this afternoon. It seems the polls were pretty accurate in figuring the percentages of the popular vote. The truly disturbing thing was regarding the exit polls. They were so wrong it isn't funny. And this is the third election cycle that this has been the case. From what I understand, the Kerry supporters were virtually orgasmic about what the exit polls suggested, the campaign workers dreaming of White House posts. CRASH! Oops. What a shame.
I would like to offer some STHU's. (That stands for "Shut the hell up!) There are many individuals and groups who have earned this directive:
Michael Moore: Shut the hell up! Your propaganda campaign was a failure. Although you did make a pretty penny off of it and the undying devotion of thousands of simple-minded fools, you also galvanized the opposition into defeating your candidate. Kinda backfired, huh?
The entire elitist artist class: Shut the hell up! This means you, actors, musicians and others who make pretty pictures and songs and think that is the most important thing in the world. The cool kids lost.
George Soros: Shut the hell up! There was an incredible waste of money! You are like so many extremists who fly off the handle and claim you are going to do this or that if Republicans will elections. You said you were going to join a monastery. Good luck with that. Maybe a vow of silence would be appropriate.
MoveOn.org: Shut the hell up! You sniveling little weenies were one of the key groups that lead the whole ABBA movement. The irony that you couldn't move on from the 2000 election is hilarious. Your vitriol was palpable. I know you won't STHU, but I can dream.
The "world community": Shut the hell up! You thought that your opinion mattered in our election. Poll after poll showed that Kerry would win a world vote overwhelmingly. Guess what. That means squat. While the nations of Europe might be happily ceding their sovereignty, Americans are fiercely independent. It's led us to the successes and prosperity for two hundred years that they could only dream of. Deal with it.
That's all for now. I'm sure I've left a lot of people off, but I'll add to this list as I think of them.
And another thing...
I want to make a suggestion for the people at World Almanac. Since some of the wacko left are so disappointed after Kerry's loss that they want to secede, I'll expand on my previous idea of three new North American countries that could be created. They should add the following new nations to their list of countries based upon the map above:
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Empire of Superiorica People: Population (2000): 60,246,523 Ethnic Groups: 75.8% white; 15.9% black; 3.9% Asian; 0.3% native American; 4.1% other; 9.2% Hispanic (all races) Principal Languages: English, French Chief Religion: various, but none actually practiced Geography: Area: 196,288 sq. mi. Neighbors: Canada on N, United States of America on S Capital: Manhattan Government: Type: Parliamentary democracy under a constitutional monarch Flag: Based upon the flag of the United Nations, features a silhouette of the country flanked by olive branches. |
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United Socialist
States of Rustopia People: Population (2000): 32,640,891 Ethnic Groups: 80.5% white; 11.5% black; 2.6% Asian; 0.6% native American; 4.9% other; 6.7% Hispanic (all races) Principal Languages: English Chief Religion: Atheism Geography: Area: 307,067 sq. mi. Neighbors: Canada on N, United States of America on S Capital: Chicago Government: Type: Communist Party-led state Flag: Yellow fist (symbol of labor) and yellow stars representing the four states of Rustopia in the upper left of a flag of red. |
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People's Republic
of Hippitoria People: Population (2000): 44,398,705 Ethnic Groups: 63.6% white; 5.7% black; 10.4% Asian; 1.1% native American; 19.2% other; 26.5% Hispanic (all races) Principal Languages: Spanish, English Chief Religion: Environmentalism Geography: Area: 344,308 sq. mi. Neighbors: Canada on N, United States of America on W Capital: San Francisco Government: Type: Communal collective Flag: A black peace symbol on field of white and thirteen multicolored stripes representing people of all races, ethnicities and sexual persuasions. |
And another thing...