Check this page for 'parenting' commentary that exhibits the same thoughtful, earnest approach you've come to expect from our reportage on commuting by mass transit and reading TV Guide.
Captured on Film
Presented in forgiving thumbnail format. Click on the small image to link to a larger version of the same image (duh).
A Boy and His Sink-Hole But we had a little different take on it. Up until this week, we had an enormous walnut tree in our front yard, one that threatened to overtake our sidewalk, uproot the home's foundation, and warehouse dozens of filthy squirrels (have you ever seen one up close?). So this week, only a short time before N's birth, we had the tree cut down and the stump ground down. Now there's a big hole and huge expanse of blank, bare sky where there had been a 40 foot tall tree.
We think this is a lovely and forward-looking gesture. As N grows, so too will the circumference and depth of the sink-hole, and the pictures of the tree that once stood there will start to yellow. By the time he's an old man, this property will have been condemned, the house long since abandoned where it sits, at the bottom of the enormous sink-hole.
Of course, not everyone is happy about this. The neighborhood's starlings and squirrels haven't been this disappointed in us since we replaced the fine seed n' nut mix we usually serve with leftover pudding tins and Folger's Instant grounds. The yard looks a little desolate to us now, but we take comfort in the realization that we killed a very large, very old organism.
We passed our beautiful idea on to K's sister, B, who, no doubt inspired by a similar made-for-basic-cable miniseries, added that N may garner worldwide pity fame and lucrative media deals by getting himself trapped in the sink-hole -- pity fame being one of the best kinds of fame. That Jessica from Texas realized like few toddlers before or since that every sink-hole is actually a gold mine, and if we hope to raise N right, we will need to transmit this to him, and provide the means to bring the ideals to fruition. It's what parents do -- good ones, anyway.
Baby's First Embarrassing Nudes!
best viewed with a web browser (duh), 24-bit color, 800x600
It's a boy! The photos proving this were not posted, but have been tucked safely away and will be used to embarrass him later in life.
E-mail D and K with your thoughtful advice. You know you're itching to.
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