Thanks, Chris, for the great resources for Holy Humor Sunday
Q. What was the worst vacation ever?
A. Noah’s boating trip. It rained forty days and forty nights. (Genesis 7:17)
Q. Who was Noah’s wife?
A. Joan of Arc.
Q. What did Noah’s wife say to Noah?
A. “I’d feel much better if those two termites were locked in a metal box.”
Q. Which is the only state mentioned in the Bible?
A. Arkansas. “Noah looked out of the Ark an’ saw the dove.”
Q. Why didn’t Noah do any fishing on the Ark?
A. He only had two worms.
Q. Why didn’t they play cards on the Ark?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck.
Q. Why did Noah not recognize the elephant?
A. The elephant was wearing sunglasses.
Q. What steps did Noah take when he first met the two lions?
A. Long ones.
Q. Why did Noah like the dogs so much?
A. They wagged their tails but not their mouths.
Q. Was there money on the ark?
A. Yes, the frog had a green back, the duck had a bill and the skunk had a scent. (Genesis 7:2)
Q. What was Noah’s big mistake?
A. Not killing the two mosquitoes.
Q. How do we know that Noah was a good listener?
A. When the last animal got on board the Ark, Noah, in halting English, said: “Now I herd everything.” (Genesis 7:2)
Q. Why is the story of Noah’s Ark an encouragement to modern drivers?
A. It took Noah over 40 days to find a parking place. (Actually it took much longer see Genesis 7:17, 24, 8:5)
Q. What keeps the ocean from running dry?
(from God Is Still Laughing III: The Young Person's Catechism Joke Book)