Chez Watt

(Many thanks go to John "catshark" Pieret for providing most of the content for this page!)

What Is Chez Watt?

Chez Watt is an informal monthly "award" by the denizens of the news group. It differs from the Post of the Month Award (or "POTM"), which is reserved for "an article posted to the Usenet newsgroup that comes closest to capturing what the newsgroup is all about," in that the "Chez Watt" is more whimsical in intent. It is dedicated to highlighting the humorous things posted to t.o. (intentionally or not). The idea for the award was originally suggested in April 2002 by "Ferrous Patella," a t.o. regular, who now administers it by gathering and posting, at the beginning of each month, all the items nominated (see below) during the previous month, and asking for a vote on which is the "best." The name is a play on the phrase "Say What?" (originally suggested by another regular, John Wilkins) and became "Chez Watt" partly as the result of a pun by Ferrous ("We could house the winners at Chez What") and partly to make it an unusual phrase, easier to find in a Google search.

What is a fit subject for a Chez Watt nomination? As Ferrous put it, "Chez Watt is where 'we' house all of those posts and quotes on TO that make you ask "Say what?". They can be bad puns, boneheadism, vivid verbal visionisms, pithy quotes, in short, items we wish to preserve but not as a "Post of the Month". The identities of the posters of the nominees are not revealed "to protect the (not so) innocent."

How to Make a Chez Watt Nomination

Anyone, newcomer or grizzled t.o. veteran, creationist or evotee, may make a Chez Watt nomination of anything that tickles his or her fancy. It is a simple 2 step process as follows: First, change the "Subject" line in your nominating post to add the words "Chez Watt." Next, making sure you quote the post being nominated, either snip away all but the particular part that is being nominated or otherwise highlight it. Adding a notation such as "Chez Watt nomination" to the body of your post is not necessary but may be helpful to others reading it, who may not always see the change in the Subject line. There is no need, as there in the case of the Post of the Month, for someone to second the nomination in order for it to be valid, though you are free to express your approval of the nomination in that or any other way you wish.

When making nominations, consider how well they will stand up out of context and anonymously. Many ironies in T.O. only hold up if one knows who said it.

The Birth of Chez Watt

For those wishing to see for themselves the history behind the Chez Watt, the following posts, and the thread they are a part of, is where it all began.

Ferrous Patella suggests we have a new category to recognize things that don't quite fit POTM

Wilkins suggests "Say What?" for the name of the new award

Ferrous agrees with the name and suggests that the winners be housed at "Chez What"

Chez Watt Winners

> > More fossils that are not dinosaurs, despite (?) their names:
> > chasmosaurs, pelycosaurs, mosasaurs, ichthyosaurs, pterosaurs,
> > ictidosaurs, microsaurs, mesosaurs, rhynchosaurs, anthracosaurs, and
> > Sauron. Say, maybe "saur" just means "reptile" in a scientific name. Ya
> > think?
> One clade to rule them all
> One genome to code them.
> One rock to fossilize them all
> and one wind to erode them
> In the land of Antarctica, where the best birds lie.

>>> It's about 40 percent Creationist, 40 percent evolutionist, and 30
>>> percent theistic evolutionist (Intelligent Design).
>> And how do you know your statistics are correct?
> Because the numbers add up?

> Not only is [the OP] divorced from reality, but reality got the
> mobile home, the pick-up truck, and the hound dog.

>>ROFL. That photo for 'Patriot University" is priceless. ROFL
>"Students in the graduate programs have the opportunity to write
>dissertations and, unlike in conventional universities, those
>dissertations will be copyrighted by the university to help
>protect the students from public discourse and scrutiny."

> > I will now retreat to my fortress and prepare to ward off
> >attacks from all quarters.
> So we'll nickel and dime you to death.

>>> It is Gods will that all men be saved.
>> That is not a universal Christian sentiment.
>> /Is/ there a universal Christian sentiment?
> 'Die, heretic!'

> > One odd thing that troubles me about Evolution is the amount of time
> > it's taken to get to humans from sponges.
> Perhaps you're not squeezing hard enough.

> I don't understand why I need a reference. I am the one making the claim.

>> Reminds me--I've got a book around here somewhere by another NASA
>> engineer, entitled "89 Reasons Why The Rapture of the Church Will
>> Happen in 1989."
>> Ok, it's a bit out of date.
> ITYM "88 Reasons Why the Rapture Could Be in 1988".
> Of course, you may have the second edition. .

Monkey Evolution March (sung to the tune of "Battle Hymn of the
Mine eyes have seen the coming of the monkey from his tree.
He is standing at the forest edge a tad unsteadily.
Now he is walking on the plain a-bending of his knee.
He keeps evolving on.
Monkey, monkey eat banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.
As he goes walking on the plain he utters not a screech.
His tiny brain is struggling for the sounds beyond its reach.
Until at last he has the rudiments of basic speech.
He keeps evolving on.
Monkey, monkey say banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.
And while he stands upon his feet his hands are free to use.
His tiny brain imagining the futures it could choose.
As he keeps making all the tools which will the world abuse.
He keeps evolving on.
Monkey, monkey cut banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.
See now the world is full of monkeys spreading by the score.
Such crowding leads to conflict and the conflict leads to war.
And watch those tiny monkeys building bombs on ev'ry shore.
He keeps evolving on.
Monkey, monkey bomb banana (x3).
He keeps evolving on.
And now the war is over smoke is rising to the sky.
There stands a lonely monkey now and he is wondr'ng why.
Away he walks into the woods and heaves a mighty sigh.
He won't evolve no more.
Monkey, monkey no banana (x3).
He won't evolve no more.

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