WEAKLY COLLUM # 0293

FOR MONDAY 07/04/2005

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IN THE FUCKIN NEWS, SUPREME COURT JUSTICE SANDRA DAY O'CONNER ANNNOUNCED THAT SHE IS RETIRING. REHNQUEST AND THE OTHER JUSTICES WILL HAVE TO LOOK FOR SOME OTHER ASS TO SQUEEZE.

I REMEMBER THINKING THAT SHE WAS A NICE PIECE OF ASS FOR A JUDGE. IT KINDA FREAKED ME OUT LAST YEAR WHEN I SAW A PICTURE OF HER BECAUSE SHE LOOKED SO OLD. I REMEMBER WHEN SHE FIRST GOT APPOINTED BACK IN THE EIGHTIES BY PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN. FOR SOME REASON, I PICTURED HER AS LOOKING THAT SAME WAY, OBLIVIOUS TO THE FACT THAT THIS WAS MORE THAN TWENTY YEARS AGO. IT SHOOK UP MY WORLD. I DIDN'T KNOW SHE WAS THAT OLD. I HADN'T SEEN A PICTURE OF HER IN TWENTY YEARS AND MY MIND NEVER DID ANY OF THAT AGE PROGRESSION SHIT THAT IT SHOULD DO TO KEEP ME UPDATED WITH REALITY. I GUESS I AM STUCK IN A TIME WARP.

THEY ALSO SHOWED A PICTURE OF JUSTICE CLARENCE THOMAS TOO. I WASN'T EXPECTING HIM TO HAVE AGED THAT MUCH EITHER. (NOT THAT I EVER THOUGHT THAT HE WAS A NICE PIECE OF ASS.) FOR SOME REASON, I THOUGHT THAT HE WOULD HAVE LOOKED THE SAME WAY AS HE DID BACK IN THE MID EIGHTIES. I THINK I NEED PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT SANDRA DAY O'CONNER RETIRING MEANS POLITICALLY OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT. I COULD IF I READ UP ON THIS SHIT, BUT I AINT GONNA. I GOT OTHER THINGS TO DO. BASICALLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY IS THAT HER OLD ASS IS RETIRING AND THAT'S ABOUT IT.

ACTUALLY THIS IS FUNNY. AFTER I WROTE THIS, I WENT TO THE INTERNET TO LOOK UP PICTURES OF SANDRA DAY O'CONNER WHEN SHE WAS FIRST APPOINTED AS SUPREME COURT JUSTICE. SHE LOOKED OLD THEN TOO. I DON'T KNOW WHO I WAS THINKING ABOUT THAT I THOUGHT LOOKED GOOD THEN - MILF GOOD. MAYBE IT WAS THAT SALLY RIDE LADY ASTRONAUT WOMAN. NOT THE ONE THAT BLEW UP IN THE SPACE SHUTTLE CHALLENGER EXPLOSION, BUT THE OTHER ONE.

ACTUALLY, SINCE SANDRA DAY O'CONNER IS THAT OLD LOOKING, SHE SHOULD RETIRE. I WANNA SEE A YOUNGER BABE ON THE BENCH. RUTH BADER GINSBURG AINT CUTTING IT. RUTH BADER GINSBURG LOOKS LIKE SHE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK GOOD WHEN SHE WAS YOUNGER. WE NEED SOME FRESH ASS IN THE SUPREME COURT.

MAYBE THAT TV JUDGE MARILYN MILIAN FROM PEOPLE'S COURT COULD SEEK THE NOMINATION FROM PRESIDENT BUSH. SHE'S HOT. THAT'S A MILF I CAN FUCK. I'D DIVE HEAD FIRST INTO THAT PUSSY GLADLY. I DIDN'T LIKE WHEN PEOPLE'S COURT BOOTED OFF ED KOCH, BUT I'M GLAD THEY BROUGHT HER IN. SHE'S TOUGH AND MEAN LIKE JUDGE JUDY, BUT SHE'S HOT. SHE'S VERY FUCKABLE. VIVA JUSTICE!

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