WEAKLY COLLUMS 2006
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DR SIMMONS WEAKLY COLLUM IS A WEB COLUMN OF AN ADULT NATURE. IT IS NOT INTENDED TO BE READ BY ANYONE UNDER THE AGE OF 18. DR SIMMONS WEAKLY COLLUM IS THE PROPERTY OF DR SIMMONS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ANY UNAUTHORIZED USE OF HIS WEAKLY COLLUM IS PROHIBITED. HERE ARE THE WEAKLY COLLUMS FOR 2006.
WEAKLY COLLUMS FOR 2006
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0319 01/02/2006 : THE START OF ANOTHER FUCKIN NEW YEAR; DICK CLARK AINT HEALTHY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0320 01/09/2006 : NUDIE PICTURES ON EBAY; DUNKIN DONUTS COMMERCIAL ACTOR MICHAEL VALE BITES IT.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0321 01/16/2006 : CHILDISH MASSACHUSETTS SENATOR TED KENNEDY IS WRITING A CHILDRENS BOOK WITH HIS DOG SPLASH.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0322 01/23/2006 : WE ARE GONNA HAVE TO FUCK UP IRAN.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0323 01/30/2006 : STORY LEAKS OUT ABOUT PARIS HILTON PISSING IN A TAXI CAB.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0324 02/06/2006 : DUMBFUCKS RIOTING OVER IMAGE OF MOHAMMAD AS A BOMB HEAD. SEATTLE SEAHAWKS AND PITTSBURGH STEELERS BATTLE IN THE SUPERBOWL.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0325 02/13/2006 : TALK SHOW HOST JOHN STEWART FATHERS A BABY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0326 02/20/2006 : VICE PRESIDENT DICK CHENEY GOES LAWYER HUNTING.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0327 02/27/2006 : GOSPEL SINGER CALLED TO HEAVEN DURING PERFORMANCE; SLIT SPLITTING MOVES ARE HURTING AMERICAN WOMEN IN THE WINTER OLYMPICS.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0328 03/06/2006 : PORT INSECURITY IN AMERICA; MAN ROCKS HIMSELF TO DEATH IN SINGAPORE.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0329 03/13/2006 : SERBIAN FUCKUP SLOBBY MILOSONOVABITCH CROAKS IN PRISON; DUDES ARRESTED FOR THEIR ALABAMA CHURCH FIRE JOKE; DR DRUNK STEPS UP TO THE OPERATING TABLE.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0330 03/20/2006 : WAR ZONE AT DENNYS; WOMEN DRIVERS LOVE THEIR MAKEUP.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0331 03/27/2006 : DON'T GET DRUNK IN TEXAS.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0332 04/03/2006 : IRAQI WAR REPORTER JILL CARROLL KEEPS HER HEAD.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0333 04/10/2006 : THE FRENCH DON'T WORK; PRAYER DON'T WORK.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0334 04/17/2006 : MEDICATION FOR THE FORGETFUL ALCOHOLIC; JERRY GARCIA'S OLE TOILET IS SOLD AND THEN STOLEN.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0335 04/24/2006 : DOOR TO DOOR FAKE DOCTOR FEELING UP WOMEN'S BREASTS; BEN AND JERRYS ICE CREAM PISSING OFF THE IRISH.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0336 05/01/2006 : OIL IS KICKING YOUR SORRY LITTLE ASSES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0337 05/08/2006 : THE ILLEGALS ARE GETTING RESTLESS; LOUIS RUKEYSER DIES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0338 05/15/2006 : WEIRD MARRIAGE IN MALAYSIA; THE MIDDLE EAST NEEDS SOME REAL HEROES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0339 05/22/2006 : NAKED TWISTER; INFLATION.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0340 05/29/2006 : ENRON BOZOS GET BUSTED; NEVER TOO SMALL FOR JAIL.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0341 06/05/2006 : BEAUTIFUL JENNIFER ANISTON GETS NAKED IN A MOVIE.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0342 06/12/2006 : TOO MUCH ATTENTION OVER A FUCKIN BABY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0343 06/19/2006 : THIS KID IS TOO INTERESTED IN PI. DRUGS FOUND AT MASSACHUSETTS HOME DEPOT STORES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0344 06/26/2006 : SOME ASSHOLE GROUP WON'T LEAVE KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN ALONE.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0345 07/03/2006 : WARREN BUFFETT GIVES BILL GATES SOME FINANCIAL HELP.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0346 07/10/2006 : WHATEVER HAPPENED TO SARS; YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU WILL FIND UP A PRISONER'S ASS.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0347 07/17/2006 : PUTIN KISSIN LITTLE BOY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0348 07/24/2006 : CELEBRITY BABY BULLSHIT AGAIN. WORLD WAR THREE.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0349 07/31/2006 : WOMAN BEATS UP ELDERLY MOTHER WITH A LAVA LAMP.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0350 08/07/2006 : IT'S FUCKIN HOT; MEL GIBSON IS HOT AT JEWS; ISRAEL IS HOT AT HEZBOLLAH.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0351 08/14/2006 : TERRORISTS ATTEMPT TO DELIVER LIQUID DEATH TO AIRLINE PASSENGERS GOING TO AMERICA.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0352 08/21/2006 : RELIGIOUS SCAM VICTIMS ON THE RISE; GERMAN FAMILY BEING EVICTED FOR PRAYING TOO LOUDLY; ANGRY MONKS FOR PEACE IN SRI LANKA.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0353 08/28/2006 : THERE'S GOT TO BE A MORNING AFTER - PILL; HELLO KITTY GLITTER LAVA LAMP.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0354 09/04/2006 : PLUTO AINT NO STINKING PLANET; KATHERINE HARRIS IS A STINKING BITCH.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0355 09/11/2006 : SAUDI ARABIA IS A FUCKED UP PLACE TO LIVE; BEAUTIFUL CNBC FINANCIAL HOST ERIN BURNETT SCRATCHES HER ASS ON TV.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0356 09/18/2006 : I PAY TRIBUTE TO THE CROCODILE HUNTER STEVE IRWIN AFTER HE DIES FROM A STINGRAY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0357 09/25/2006 : THE POPE DOESN'T LIKE VIOLENT MUSLIMS; NEW ZEALAND SAYS THAT SMUGGLING DRUGS INSIDE OF LAVA LAMPS IS WONG.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0358 10/02/2006 : WEST VIRGINIA MINERS DYING TO KILL THEMSELVES; FEMALE ASTRONAUT COLLAPSES ON EARTH; PARIS HILTON GETS DRUNK AND DRIVES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0359 10/09/2006 : I GO TO THE DOCTORS; MIAMI CATHOLIC PRIESTS STEAL A BUNCH OF MONEY FROM THE CHURCH.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0360 10/16/2006 : NORTH KOREA TESTING A NUCLEAR BOMB; CONGRESSMAN MARK FOLEY SENDING INSTANT MESSAGES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0361 10/23/2006 : GETTING HIGH ON MARIJUANA TO PROTECT YOUR MEMORY.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0362 10/30/2006 : IT'S ELECTION TIME AGAIN.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0363 11/06/2006 : LAURA BUSH WANTS ME TO VOTE REPUBLICAN.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0364 11/13/2006 : THE DEMOCRATS ARE INVADING OUR GOVERNMENT; SADDAM HUSSEIN IS GONNA CROAK FOR HIS CRIMES.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0365 11/20/2006 : ISRAEL HATES GAYS; LEGENDARY ECONOMIST MILTON FRIEDMAN CROAKS.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0366 11/27/2006 : O.J. SIMPSON WRITES A BLOOD TAINTED BOOK; COMEDIAN MICHAEL RICHARDS DOESN'T LIKE BLACK HECKLERS; ISRAELI HOTTIE IN THE ARMY GETS BRUISED UP.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0367 12/04/2006 : IT'S HARD FOR DIRTY OLD BASTARDS TO SEE STRIPPERS; STAY AWAY FROM ALLIGATORS IF YOU ARE HIGH ON CRACK.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0368 12/11/2006 : NAUGHTY NURSES TO GIVE YOU A HEART ATTACK; NEW YORK CITY FUCKING WITH RESTAURANTS OVER TRANS FATS; GAY PENGUINS.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0369 12/18/2006 : IT'S IMPOLITE FOR WOMEN TO FART ON A PASSENGER AIRPLANE; COMEDY ACTOR PETER BOYLE BITES IT.
WEAKLY COLLUM # 0370 12/25/2006 : I HATE THE CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS.
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