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March 31, 2002
Easter Easter Easter Easter Easter Easter!!!
Happy Pagan Holiday!
Some interesting things that you don't know about easter...
the name is from the festival of Oestre (sometimes spelled "Estre"), pronounced "Eestruh", the Anglo-Saxon Goddess of Spring, Fertility and New Life. Since ancient times, pagans have worshipped rabbits as sex and fertility gods, and have looked upon them as symbols of lust, sexual vigor and reproduction. In the traditions of Egypt and Persia there are such rabbit gods, and they were particularly honored in the Springtime. In a broad range of pagan societies, from Egypt and Mesopotamia to the British Isles, brightly-decorated eggs were (and still are) presented as gifts and charms to bring (supernaturally) fertility and sexual success each Spring.
This all comes together in our Easter customs in the pagan tradition of Oestre. There was a great bird who intensely desired to be a rabbit. The Goddess Oestre graciously turned the bird into a rabbit, and in gratitude the rabbit (who could still remember how to lay bird eggs) came each Spring, during the Festival of Oestre, and laid beautiful eggs for the benevolent goddess. This is exactly how we got a supernaural, egg-laying rabbit god in our Easter tradition.
I bet you didn't know that, ehhhhhh...
So. I spent Easter at my parents house today and it was egg-cellent. You see what I did there? Anyway. I had a great time...and again, I am the girl who is the favorite #1 kid in the family.
I rule.
I hope you had a good easter day.
posted at 11:17 AM
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March 30, 2002
My outline for my "sacred book project" is done. It's called The Top Five Titles For This Book .
That should give you a hint as to what the book is about.
I also picked up a hardbound notebook so that I can write down ideas for my books as I come upon them. I generally get ideas and then say "oh I'll remember them as soon as I get home" and as cliche would have it, I forget them. I have a long drive to school and back, so it gives me plenty of time to think.
I've never been this interested in any project I've done. It's nice and comforting.
There's also a story idea I've been working on for about a year and 6 months now. I don't quite know how to get it out onto paper.
You see, I'm not one of those conventional writers. I'm not an author. I just write stuff that hopefully people will get a kick out of. I don't take myself seriously. I just write about shit that happens and mostly make people laugh or want to know more. It's mostly personal, journalistic type editorial creative nonfiction type stuff. It's not tell a story that gets you wrapped up like Stephen King stuff.
So, with that said, this story that I've been working on. Because it's true to life stuff, it's real stuff...I'm trying to get it out so that I can remember it but also so that people don't get hurt in the process. There's a lot of stories I have to tell. Especially from last year. Every month last year was incredibly horrible. (except for October).
They're interesting. I can make them interesting. These stories deserve to be told, I think, because they're stranger than fiction. Things that have happened to me in the past two years don't happen in real life. Or at least they shouldn't. I don't think I've ever talked about them here.
I find it hilarious though, that I write completely different here than I do when I'm writing for class or something. I mean the structure is the same but...I don't know. Maybe that's because what I write here isn't mostly to entertain. I have to stop overanalyzing things.
But anyway.I think I'm going to make a papermache cat. I've already made all 4 of my cats out of clay. Hm. What else. I think right now I'm just typing to be typing so that should be my clue to stop.
posted at 12:56 AM
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March 28, 2002
I sit down to write for my books...and I can't.
I am in such a bad mood that my eyes are burning from the anger.
I called my insurance company to ask about taking care of my jaw...and they won't cover it. So I guess that means I'm stuck with this fucked up jaw for the rest of my life, or until I get a really high paying job so I can afford to pay insanely high doctor bills. Unless someone wants to break my jaw for me, then it's an emergency case...and then insurance will cover it. I'm sure I'll have quite a few takers.....
Maybe I'm overtired.
Maybe I'm just ...i don't know.
My allergies are getting worse, my fucking heart potential problem...what does that mean potential problem ? I mean, yeah i know what it literally means, but when your doctor tells you "you have a potential problem", is it something I need to worry about or is it something that I should just keep an eye on. I asked ...and he said "yes".
Okay, fucker.
I'm fucking checking my blood pressure every thirty minutes. My allergy medicine might be hurting my heart. What a great thing. If I stop taking my allergy medicine, I'll be a sneezing, weepy puffy eyed bag of ouch. If I don't, I could be causing permanent damage.
Anyway, that's just an aside...no big deal, right?
Times like this, when I'm in such a bad mood...I get really pissy and sad about everything. I get mad about my fucking job (or lack thereof), I get mad about things that happened in the past, I dwell on mistakes I've made, I talk shit to myself about myself, I get really irritated when I have to talk to people, I fucking HATE star trek right now.
I just want to spend the whole day watching court tv.
That's all I want
I want to spend a day alone, with food around me, watching FBI Files, Justice Files, COPS, The System, Mugshots, Forensic Investigators, The New Detectives....
(that's a mix of court tv, discovery and tlc...)
I want those shows on right now
Fuck. I just need to go to bed.
posted at 11:35 PM
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March 26, 2002
What makes a serial killer a serial killer and not a spree killer?
Can you name one spree killer?
Do you know what the difference between a serial killer and a mass murderer is?
I don't think it's a morbid question. I think it's wondering how informed the general public is about the murders that go on in our nation.
Some say Andrew Cunanan was a spree killer....Do you know enough to form an opinion.
Some say that Richard Ramirez could be considered a spree killer. I disagree...
Kc...what do you think?
Anyway. I have a job interview tomorrow. Clerical. Yeah. Bleh. It's work though. I really want that job at Oakland County Schools. I just want to write all day for class. Can I get paid for that?
Please?
posted at 12:37 AM
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March 24, 2002
Fucking Momento was RIPPED OFF for the best editing award.
Sons of Bitches.
It makes me want to slap the faces of the academy. First Royal Tenenbaums only is nominated for one award and now this.
Yeah. I'm glad I don't want to be part of Hollywood anymore. I can't be around that. Fucking fake ass hollywood.
I honestly believe that old time Hollywood was never this bad.
I could be fooling myself, though.
But the one thing about hollywood ...I would KILL to play in an orchestra conducted by John Williams. Man he's awesome.
posted at 10:29 PM
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I'm not going to tell you what store I work in. It is not one of the ones listed. But I think I reveal enough of myself that I don't need to get into the gory details.
Be happy I tell you details at all.
Thanks. Have a nice day.
posted at 1:29 AM
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March 19, 2002
All I have been posting lately is boring unreadable bullshit. I'm not going to apologize for it because I mostly just post things here so that I can remember them, or because If I don't write about it, the feelings will fester inside of my head and I could potentially burst into flames.
Mostly, I've been posting this crap because I've been doing so much writing for class. The last thing I can do is write an inviting entry. This sounds like an apology doesn't it? Hm. Well, enough of that. Anyway, that's the heads up.
Like I mentioned earlier, I'm back doing stock at Amy's store. It's fine. At least I'm active, yeah. It gives me plenty of time to do my homework. And I still get to see a lot of the mall drama that goes on behind the scenes most normal non-mall workers would never experience. Drama over the dumpster.....oh the drama over the dumpster. And the sick part I find myself getting involved in this drama! It's insane! It takes you buy the arm and just pulls you in kicking and screaming.
"la la la, I'm going to throw out the garbage..wee! What's this? BOXES?! IN THE DUMPSTER?!? Who the fu..? What in the .... Those rat bastard son of a bitches." She throws the trash bags on the ground and puts her hands on her hips. She looks around and reaches into the dumpster. (It's not that gross. It's a compactor dumpster. You never really come in contact with garbage) She pulls out the boxes and throws them over her shoulder. "Fucking stupid *mumble grumble* can't even break down a fucking cardboard box *mumble grumble*" She throws in her trash and shuts the compactor door. She grabs the boxes and scoots them over to the dumpster ...looking at the name. "OF course!! Fucking Bananna Republic. Bastards think that they can get away with this fucking bitches. Ha. Wait 'till security comes by, they'll get in SO much trouble" She walks back into her store, locks the door and stops. "Wait a minute. Just wait a goddamned minute. Did I just complain about fucking BOXES IN A DUMPSTER? I did. Oh man, that's sad."
Yes. This is a scene that happens nearly every day that I work. Some lazy schlub puts boxes inside of the dumpster/compactor instead of breaking them down and putting them into the recycling bin. The problem with putting boxes in the dumpster/compactor is twofold. One: if you put a lot of unbrokendown boxes in the dumpster/compactor it jams the thing to all holy hell and no one can use it. Two: It fills the dumpster/compactor twice as fast and then you are forced to go to the other side of the mall, carrying your trash through the labrynthian back hallways....and you meet people from the other side of the mall who are very, very protective of their own dumpster/compactor. It's a complex system we have there at the mall. You have to abide by the rules and people just are too lazy. Especially those Bananna Republic fucks who think they're the best.
Did you know that there's an entire soap opera happening before your eyes at your local mall? When you work at a mall, and you're uninvolved with making drama waves, you step back, look at these people and watch the circus unfold before your eyes. You learn amazing and wonderful things. It's astonishing. The Claires girls are known as the mall whores. They do not like it when you step in on a man that they have their sights on. For fun, casually mention to several of these men that they are only 16 and 17, which explains why they only get to work after 3pm. Watch the hilarity ensue. The Hudsons, excuse me, the Marshall Fields workers are the leathery old women and flaming old men who come behind the building to smoke their 5 cigarettes on break. They are horrible to look at and they smell of extremely expensive perfume that also doubles as a paint stripper....but they're among the nicest people in the mall. If you can get close enough to talk to them. The Cinnebun workers are the stupidest in the mall and also double as backup relief for the Claires girls.
I've heard, should the story be believed, that one of the Cinnebun girls used to take men into the hallways behind the stores and flash them her thonged ass ...oooh. She also tried to get them to hump her right then and there, but again, should the story be believed, many a men went fleeing. Lenscrafters is where the liars work. The Pottery Barn stock people think that they are the kings of the hallways. Often they fill up the entire hallway behind my store with boxes and stock, making it imposible to get by...and they don't even listen when you say "um excuse me!" They also often run into you with their little stock pushing carts. Jerks. And ...Bananna Republic. OOoh...I hate them. They are the biggest bunch of queens you've ever seen. Everyone in that store is gay...(not that there's anything wrong with that...) and they are the meanest of the gays that you can ever possibly encounter. You know, the ones that sneer behind their limp wrists, exclaiming "Oh no girl, I did not just see a lady walk in wearing THAT!" They've high-fived eachother after comments like this too. The women, all very bony and stylish are fall vying for the attention of their little queen bee's so that they can be the girl with the most gay friends. They refuse to pay attention to the customers and on occasion have turned up the music in the store to ear shattering decibles because "ooh girl that's my song!" Their stock boys stare at other stock workers like we're alien races coming down to their own little disco ball planet ...and HEAVEN HELP YOU if you ask to borrow any boxes or tape for your own stock transfer. They will show you to the smallest most pathetic little stack of boxes and will hand you some scotch tape. Yeah, thanks a lot. And don't bother to ask them for larger boxes because they apparently don't understand that you're also speaking English.
Ah, and this all goes on behind the backs of the unassuming customers. Unless you work retail, you will never ever know what goes on. You will be blind to the antics that take place.
I just wrote an entire entry on the mall.
There goes my street cred all to hell.
posted at 10:34 PM
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March 17, 2002
So I've decided that I'm going to go and get my Ph.D in creative writing.
I want to teach classes about writing. I want to be one of those cool teachers that teach you how to think outside of the box, that inspire you to do something fun and interesting with your writing. I think that is the best thing for me.
And, after talking with a couple of professors at my school, I've discovered if I also have some emphasis in film somewhere in my background I may also be able to teach about films and things. What a perfect day!
Now, I just have to get it together with Eastern to figure out what I need to graduate and then maybe apply to the grad school there. It's so easy to get into Eastern...and it's got a program designed for commuter students. Hm. I don't know, that's a few months off...and have to take my GRE.
I feel excited about planning for my future.
Now I just need a really well paid job that lets me pick my own hours.
posted at 12:50 PM
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March 16, 2002
I have just witnessed two of the coolest things in my entire life. I will never see anything else as cool.
One is a guy from Mexico who dresses up in a Colorful transformer costume and drives around in his bright colorful transformer car. I mean it's a giant monstrosity of lights and colors and Sharp edges and pointy little faces. It's huge and insane. The guy was apparently called "crazy driver" throughout his neighborhood...though i can't say for sure because I was watching it on the Spanish channel and I don't speak spanish. Yeah.
So.
The second is ...parapalegic hockey. OH Mother of heaven, this is the coolest thing. They skate around on their bums on these little ice skate sleds...and use two mini sticks to help propel them, and to push the puck around. I love it.
Norway vs. Usa right now. USA is winning and the norwegian goalie is very upset. He banged his fist on the ice.
I feel like hugging my tv.
posted at 6:15 PM
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March 15, 2002
It's so weird that the "I Wanna Dip My Balls In It" guy from The State is on a new sitcom.
I can't look at him without screaming "I WANNA DIP MY BALLS IN IT!!" maybe not outloud...but in my head, sure.
So I got another audit in the mail today. Hm. It appears NOW that instead of the 15 classes, I need 3 classes. Two I knew of and one elective.
This school is going to be the death of me, I swear. It just doesn't make any sense what so ever.
I was too afraid to ask my teacher today about the award today. I think I jinxed myself. I'm afraid. I want this award but I'm afraid that by being happy about it, I"m not going to get it now.
Damn my low self esteem.
Damn you all to hell.
posted at 12:18 AM
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March 14, 2002
The main page has changed. This is what I'm sticking with for a while I think. I don't have anything else up yet so you'll have to deal. I mean, technically, it's all there...but it's all the old stuff. Oh well.
I'm tired.
I have a long long day tomorrow. I'm upset about a few things but I can't share them with anyone.
I'm starting to get concerned about this award I'm supposedly recieving. I feel like something bad is coming along with it. I don't just get offered awards like this. There has to be a catch.
I'm so sad.
posted at 12:16 AM
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March 12, 2002
I found out last night that I will be receiving departmental honors in English. The only way to "win" this award is to be nominated by a department head. Apparently, my professor has been talking with other professors about my work and they unanimously agree that I should be graduating with Honors. How awesome. I almost cried when she told me.
She also said that having me in her classes this semester was the highlight of her day and that I'm one of the most talented students she's come across....
Normally I wouldn't post something like that in here because its all "ooh look at me, i'm so cool blahblah" but damnit, I needed to have something to be proud about.
I'm late for work now but i'll discuss more of this later.
posted at 10:08 AM
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March 07, 2002
So great. Here i am up at school. I had a meeting with a audit advisor today. She left early. Something about one of her students was here and she had her coat on...I have no idea what this means. But it just goes to show exactly how cryptic this fucking school is. So yes, this means I have to wait until MONDAY to meet with my audit advisor and...be here before 4pm, when my class starts at 7.
Yeah, sounds like a lot of fun to me.
Damnit.
I'm in the computer lab at school right now. I haven't been in this lab in years. It's still the same but they have these goddamned iMac's that I feel like kicking through the wall. I fucking hate mac's for anything but working with Photoshop or Avid. I mean, seriously, what's with the iMac mouse anyway? It's a complete round circle. Who ever thought this would be a good idea? Fuckers.
Man, I'm in such a foul mood. I just want to find out what's going on with my audit and no one can seem to help me. I asked the lady at the audit desk if there was someone else who could help me. I explained my situation and the discrepency between the academic advisor and the audit report. She said "which was in your favor?" I told her the audit. She replied, "well, I'd go with that then." Thanks a lot, that's a lot of official help there. "Go with whatever you think is best".
Sure.
That's how I got into this mess in the first place, you assholes.
I just don't know what to do. If I have to take the 10 more classes or whatever that my advisor told me, I know I'm not going to go back. I'm going to get indignant again and just say "fuck it" and quit. There's no reason I should have to RETAKE classes that I took about 8 years ago.
Holy crap. That's a long time when you see it written out. It doesn't seem that long when I say it outloud "Yeah, when I took classes in 94"...but when I write "when i was here 8 years ago" ....jeeeee-sus. I should be graduated and done with this fucking school.
I can't stand it.
I hope I don't have to take these.
In other news, I worked at Amy's today. It was great fun. I had a good time and sang really loud while doing stock. It was like I never left. How strange it was, though, to be walking through the back hallway, standing outside by the recycler and not smoking. I hate the fact that I quit, but I know I won't ever start back up again.Maybe I will when I have kids. I'll have to have something to say "you kids drove me to smoke" instead of picking up a habit like drinking or spanking. I'll need something.
I kept expecting to run into people, but I knew that wasn't going to happen.
I applied for a job with Oakland County Schools, as a secretary for like 30-40 grand a year. Requirements are : answering a multi-line phone system, filing and some data entry. GED or High School Diploma and 1 year experience are required.
Um,. Hello. Talk about awesome. I called the girl in HR who placed the ad and chatted with her a bit, just basically so that she'd remember my name when I sent the resume over. I asked her some questions about which would be the best format to send my resume, how should I send it, would she prefer if I dropped it off, blah blah blah ....man. never in a million years would I have expected that I would be excited to become a secretary. But shit, the work situation around here sucks balls. And I'm really jaded with the "film" industry. In fact, I don't even really like it anymore. I hate the fakeness that surrounds it all. I need to be around something where people are excited for you to succeed, not secretly hoping that you fail so they can get your position. Or, talking about you behind your back and lying to your face. It goes on *SO* much in the "film" industry that I can't even stand it. I 'm sure it's prevelant in any area you work in , but man, does it suck when it's with supposed "creative" and "individualistic" type people.
I think "creative" and "individualistic" are synonyms for "stuck up" and "arrogant".
I have an hour before class starts and this computer lab is killing me. It's like 85 degrees and playing havoc with my allergies. Anything over 75 degrees puts me in an intensely foul mood.
I wonder how a lot of people I went to school with are doing. I wonder what they are doing with their so called film degrees. I know Sloth will tell me that a film degree is worthless and I should be out there making the films, not going to school for it. I agree. It's bullshit. I just wanted to get a film degree so I could go and possibly teach one day. I wanted to use the school for its resources. Where else could I get to use all sorts of film, cameras and editing equiptment for free? Unless I got a good job, but then who has the time when you're working all the time on WORK stuff...instead of fun stuff.
I don't know. i know that I don't want to go back for a film degree. It just doesn't make my heart sing like it used to. I'm not interested in interpreting the colors used in the film..."In the film Great Expectations, directed by Alfonso Cuaron, what does the color green represent?" "Why is the film, Sleepy hollow, directed by Tim Burton, so much more effective with the washed out tinge rather than straight on color?"
I don't know. I don't know. I just know that I like what I like. i'm tired of overanalyzing why I like it. I just want to do cool stuff like make books and cut out pictures and past them in a book and tell a story about them. I enjoy being silly and fun, and creating. I feel like I should be a kindergarten teacher, but the problem is I don't get on with children.
So where am I going to go from here? I don't know. maybe I'll just get my degree and then what? I don't know. Get a Ph.D in what? It just confuses me to all hell.
My whole life I've wanted to work in films in one form or another. i wanted to be a special effects creator, I wanted to be Rick Baker. I wanted to write horror films. I wanted to direct films. I wanted to edit films.
Now I don't want to be involved with it at all.
It's sort of a shock, really. I don't know what to think of myself.
I mean, picture it, if you were in my place. Something that you've known as an integeral part of yourself, something that has made you who you were ....is now gone. That something ...doesn't exsist. What do you do? How do you work around it?
I don't know.
It doesn't really upset me. I don't even think about it, to be honest. But, I'm bored...I've got 45 minutes before class starts and I get to thinking about these things.
Oh well. Maybe I should go see if I can buy a book to read or something.
posted at 6:06 PM
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March 06, 2002
I'm sorry ms. jackson...OOOOH!!! I am for real!! I sure love me some outkast. I have a mix of two songs running through my head. I'm never going to get to sleep tonight.
So, I met with my academic advisor today. What a waste of an hour. I am so upset. My advisor spent 90% of my time there talking to me about how pissed he is at people who play sports becuase they don't deserve to graduate and even attend our sacred university because "everyone knows that athletes are idiots". Holy shit! I mean what do I say to this?? I just nodded and said "mm hmm. I didn't think stuff like that really happened. yeah yeah". He droned on and on about athletes and their bad grades while I tried to stear the conversation towards my studies. FInally, after 5 minutes of him reviewing my transcript, he makes some marks on a piece of paper and then gets up and puts his coat on. I guess that's my clue to get out of his office because he's going home! What the fuck?! He tells me as he's ushering me out of his office that it appears that I'll have to take approximately 10 (!?!?) more classes to fufill my basic studies.
um. no.
I ask him what about the several classes he's missing, (i point to my transcript) that I took honors, my first year at Eastern. "I don't think those count' He says and waves goodbye.
SO I head over to the records department to go over my audit with someone who might be able to help me. I'm nearly in tears at this point because there's no way in hell I'm going to go back and finish ten classes that I already took and passed with A's. The audit lady says 'no, it says you only need 3 more classes here."
Thank you. Validation from someone who knows what they're talking about.
I ask her about my honors classes and she looks at me like I'm an idiot.."of course those count" she says.
Well, duh.
I want to smack that advisor in the mouth. No wonder people fuck up their studies so much at school, with advisors like that.
Sheesh.
I may have another appointment tomorrow with a different auditor, so we'll see. But it looks like my classes left to take are: Math, Physical Science and 1 elective.
Fun.
"Cause the whole, world, loves it when you don't get down (bah bah da bah bah bahdah!)"
posted at 11:52 PM
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March 05, 2002
holy shit .
The Osbornes is the funniest show on fucking tv right now.
Greatest show on earth.
Seriously.
It's on mtv ..
go look it up cos the link I found doesn't work.
Go. RUn. Look it up.
Damnit.
posted at 11:07 PM
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Cease to exsist, giving my goodbye
So I have some hours lined up at my old job with Amy. Perks: being with Amy, moving around, singing as loud as I want doing stock...UnPerks: memories of things I'd rather not remember.
I think the perks outweigh the unperks, definately for sure. I just have the feelings of remembering. I wrote like 8 pages yesterday in class about remembering
Drive my car into the ocean
So on my way home from class I drove by spots I remembered. It's funny how much I can remember and how much I can feel from those memories...when I can't even remember what I'm supposed to do today.
I think these unwanted memories are taking up space in my brain. Either that or I have to train my mind to use up more than it's stupid little 10%.
You think I'm dead, but I sail away....
Sometimes, I think it would be easier to just pretend people are dead than wonder about them. I should hold a little funeral for people I don't want to remember any more. People who don't need remembering. I don't know why I keep this baggage. I hate the feeling that I have to censor what I say here. This pisses me off.
No one understands. No one ever will. No one will ever know the feeling that goes on inside my heart every day, every last minute. Constantly. It's part of my soul and I'll never get rid of this feeling. I have to just accept it.
On a wave of mutilation
I think by fighting it, trying to destroy it, I make it stronger. I feed this feeling of lust and anger and memories. I have to just give in to it, but I'm afraid that if I give in...it will make things harder than they already are. I'll become consumed with trying to live out a memory. I'll become nothing but a playback on someone 's vcr.
I've kisses mermaids, rode the el nino
I want to get the feelings out. I know that if I had an outlet, a way to show the world what I feel, what I see inside, the things that I had that were more unique more interesting...more everything than anyone's ever had......I think i'll be free. There were so many things that happened, so many things that I can't express in words. Magic. And I'll never ever experience something like that again. It's so terrible, the loss I feel.
Walked the sand with the crustaceans
I don't cry about it. I don't mourn every day. I am happy where I am and I wouldn't change things now. It's this crazy duality that exsists ...churning and burning inside of me. It hurts a lot.
Could find my way to mariana
I know that if I were given the chance to ask questions, to find out what exactly happened...it would be gone. I'm not given that chance though, so I fear that I'm doomed to live a life of questions and overdramatic gesturing. I know the things I say sound terribly cliche and trite. I know that you don't know what I'm talking about. I know that you're getting sick of hearing it.
I am too.
On a wave of mutiliation
I think my peace that I'll have to make with this memory is that I'll allow it to take residence in my body and soul like a goddamned parasite but it has to stop trying to take over my writing.
That's all I ask.
Wave.......
posted at 12:46 PM
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March 02, 2002
While getting ready this morning, I put mp3's on random and turned up the sound.
I'm standing in the bathroom and I find a picture in my makeup case that I swear to god was NOT there yesterday.
Then in order, following "random" songs play:
"Trouble Loves Me" - Morrissey
"Fighting Fit" - Gene
"Hope" - Descendents
"Ordinary Boys" - Morrissey
"Paranoid Android" - Radiohead
"Goldfinger" - Ash
"Saturday Night" - Misfits
"Blackbird" - Beatles
This is not random. This is freaky.
What are you trying to tell me?!
for fucks sake.
(I'm sorry this is cryptic. Every song has meaning. They're related to the picture I found.)
Addendum:
Something I have saved from the past, a piece of paper that I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I put "away" was found in my coat pocket just as I was getting ready to leave.
I think I want to go back to bed.
posted at 12:20 PM
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March 01, 2002
There's something so something about Michale Graves. For those not in the know, he replaced Glenn Danzig in the Misfits, left the Misfits and is now the singer for the band Graves. Never before have I been so into a singers voice. It's almost borderline freakish. It's not that I'm listening to the music so much as just trying to listen to his voice. I am so into it that it's consuming. It's like I want to grab it from my speakers and eat it just so I can have it with me all the time. I want to have something tangible of his voice so that when I listen to the music I can squeeze his little voice effigy and squeal like a little girl. I want to make it dance around to the music and sing for me. I'll tuck it into bed at night and make it pancakes for breakfast with homemade syrup. I'll take it to the zoo and give it money to feed the ducks those little pellets.
Yeah. I've completely lost it.
posted at 1:36 PM
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