June 2004.
Fell asleep on the couch. So this updates like an hour late. Doubt I'm gonna add anything in this snippet that's either funny or informative. So in the spirit of non information that isn't funny I give you great words from not very great men. "F*@k You" Dick Cheney.
"No one would have doubted his ability to reign had he never been emperor." "Publius Cornelius Tacitus"
Battle for the Sudan Outside Link
Free the Pharoah Outside Link
A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.
The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You''ll feel so much better!"
The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.
So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you''ll see, you''ll feel so good!"
The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.
"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you''ll feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.
The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."
The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a fucking idiot every time he's on ecstasy!"
Disappearing Bush
Trolling for Fun
Made it half way through my blogroll tonight. Stocked up on pictures, links, and things to amuse. Dug into my brain for some twisted fiction. Big news today is the token handover of power to the Iraqis. Other big news is Michael Moore. The right bashes the movie, calls it crap filled with lies. I'm willing to believe them if they'd put up or shut up. If it's filled with lies take Moore to court for slander. If they can't because he isn't guilty maybe they should shutup and go drink koolaid. The left is bashing the handover of power. Hey give em a chance to kick our troops out all on their own. Which brings me to the point of the day. When are our troops coming home? Why are we building so many bases in Iraq? How exactly is this helping the war on terrorism. Why don't I feel any safer? Why is it I no longer trust my government? Don't get lost in the rhetoric, the lies, the refusals to accept facts. Zealots and fanatics don't deal in logic. Stop trying. Your only pissing yourself off and aggravating them during mass.
"I think it was a relief for Americans to look at pictures of something besides men on leashes. If you are going to call yourself a Christian, and I don't, then you have to ask yourself a fundamental question, and that is, Whom would Jesus torture? Whom would Jesus drag around on a dog's leash? How can Christians tolerate it? It is unconscionable. It has put our young men and women who are over there, fighting a war that they should not have been asked to fight, it has put them in greater danger." "Ron Reagan"
Hexxagon Outside Link
Camper Strike Outside Link
There's a woman that has a big problem when it came to farting. She farts all the time, yet is never be able to smell or hear them. So one day she decides to go to the doctor about the problem. She tells him how she is always leaving these long, hard farts that she can never smell or hear. The doctor thinks about it and sends her home with some pills, telling her to come back a week later.
When she comes back to his office, she tells him how she still is having these horrible farts, but now they smell like rotting eggs. The doctor's only reaction to this was... "It's good to know we cleared up your sinuses. Now to work on your hearing...."
The Bastards
Conservation
I'm trashed. Hurrah! My weekend blended into a very nice buzz that continued for just a few unpleasant moments of sobriety before the excess alchohal I had drank the night before had a chance to break past my livers last feebles defenses. I'm diving into my blogroll smashed above and beyond the call of duty. I wish you a good week coming, and wishes for a good Indepence Day. Shit you really wanna see indepence? Everyone don't go to work this Friday. many of us already have Monday off because of the Fourth. But the amount of money lost to the global corporations if we all just didn't work Friday really sends a message. It's one of the reasons Kennedy stepped in during the truckers strike. Read my blogroll and follow me decline into a drunken stupor. I'm starting from the top.
"It ain't no use putting up your umbrella till it rains."
"Alice Caldwell Rice"
Plumber Outside Link
Spec Ops Outside Link
Did Ya Miss Me
Death
This is my Truth Laid Bear commentary. I'm feeling lazy tonight. Not wanting to work that hard. And well it's about time I throw a shout to all those who link to me through Truth Laid Bear. I know I do have some regular readers now, and would consider it a favor if you were to stop by and check out all these peoples stuff. So without further ado. D C Thronton, Patterico's, Eccentricity, Coffee House Studio, Approximately Perfect, Whoviating, In Search of Utopia, and Byte Back. But not to be forgotten is a blogger who I think is starting to come into his scream. His primal urges to point out whats wrong are starting to come together and grow teeth. So go give some love to Radically Inept. And I promise this weekend I'll check out my blog roll and try and comment to something everywhere I go. Hmm maybe a form letter sort of spam promoting my web page. Hmmmmm. Naw. I'll just visit and try and make sense. See ya there.
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy -- but that could change.""
"Dan Quayle"
Guy Porn Outside Link
Girl Porn Outside Link
Yeti Sports 5 Outside Link
Squirrel Hunt Outside Link
Any Wonder
Stupor
None of that link stuff tonight. I'm bone tired and going to get to bed before midnight for a change. Added another five more links to my link list. Yes Harry it is getting rather large. See if you can find the new ones. Melting hot here in Florida right now. We working poor often have to put silly things like food, bills, our kids before air conditioning, but trust me, one of these days I'm going to get AC and die a happy man. It'll keep my corpse fresher longer. But with all the preservatives in the food I eat my organs should still be good for visual display for a few thousand years.
"Until the philosophy which holds one race superior and another inferior is finally and permanently discredited and abandoned, everywhere is war and until there are no longer first-class and second-class citizens of any nation, until the color of a man's skin is of no more significance than the color of his eyes. And until the basic human rights are equally guaranteed to all without regard to race, there is war. And until that day, the dream of lasting peace, world citizenship, rule of international morality, will remain but a fleeting illusion to be pursued, but never attained... now everywhere is war.""
"Bob Marley"
3D Pong Outside Link
Bunny Game Outside Link
Blogging Blind
World
Another day gone and past. Half way to the weekend. I'm gonna be broke but I'm willing to bet I'll drag some friends off canoeing this weekend. We usually spend cheap. A loaf of bread, some meat, condiments, some beer, soda for the boys. We're good to go. Then a hurried bustle to wake everyone, load the canoes, get on the road. My dogs go berserk right about the time I load the canoes. They know most weekends I go I'll take them with me. It's illegal to take them where we go, but dammit I was born here before all the yankees moved south and started pushing for laws, and buying up the beach. Most weekends they don't piss anyone off. Occasionally they run up to some sunbathing beauty queen who takes offense and that kind of ruins it until they leave. Usually they leave when two boat loads of people start giving them the "you're a bitch" look. But eventually I'll have to answer to the authorities. I found through expreience the best way to answer is "what?". Then ask them to explain what laws your breaking and what citation numbers. They get soo tickled to be able to show off their knowledge they'll usually let you go. Hey even cops need love and appreciation. Any wonder the bastards are usally as kinky as they are. But that's another story now isn't it. Go on. Read my page. Play the games. Find some porn. But know that I'm watching. Yes you. And stop touching that.
"Status quo, you know, that is Latin for "the mess we're in.""
"Ronald Reagan"
Bow Man Outside Link
Juggler Outside Link
Auto Repair
Prohibitionist
Wiped out. I am practicing the Drunken part of Monkey Style Blogging. I'm also about as tired as they come. My lifestyle and blogging leaves me catching about three hours sleep a night. So if on occasion I mispell things, punctuate inappropriately, or fudge up in a noticeable way, well forgive me. I always enjoyed sleep and now as I grow older it sems the one thing I cannot do. Also I've not made it to the beach in over two weeks. Maybe three. This Saturday I plan on canoeing through the canoe trails of South Lido Beach, then get trashed at the drum circle Sunday night. I'm due. If you can't make it check around your area for one. Drag along a twelve pack, or whatever. Kick back and stay late. Your mind will thank you for it later.
"If the federal government had been around when the Creator was putting His hand to this state, Indiana wouldn't be here. It'd still be waiting for an environmental impact statement."
"Ronald Reagan"
3D Tunnel Game Outside Link
Spank the Monkey Outside Link
Dammit
Need Advice
I read on some blog that not only should I try writing every day, but I should write about myself. Now I am a fairly boring fellow really. My life is mundane. This could be seen as a good thing. Chinese curse stating "may you live in interesting times." A curse hidden within someone elses blessing. But my mundane is many others extreme. Those things I take for granted others about piddle themselves over. I mean in some peoples eyes I am as good as an E ticket at Disneyland. In this I can gain some sort of sick pride. The pirate within me going Arrr! in great satisfaction. The citizens are duly impressed. I have no need to share my feelings or become human. I play the part I placed myself in over time. Now I must choose if I would rather have character, or be a character. Then grabbing my floppy old straw hat from the back of the couch I head off into the night. Yo Ho, Yo Ho, A bottle of rum for me. Yo Ho, Yo Ho, I'll come home stumbling you shall see. And how much easier this path than dealing with the mundane of daily slights and insults left unquestioned. How much easier than telling it like it is to the world filled with clueless dolts. When you realize that commen sense isn't that commen you can either fight the idiocy, or you can fight yourself. Right now I'm fighting an eighteen pack and doing a damn good job of not only winning but supporting beer makers and their children nationwide. I fight for nothing because nothing has fought for me. The crys from the right of respecting the dead who fought for my freedom ignore my years of lost freedom for something I should have been free to do. Ignore the fact I wasn't free to do these things. Ignore the fact our government has infringed on my freedom. I was a prisoner of war and fought accourdingly. Now I am old and see nothing changes quickly. In this I hold no hope of America digging itself out of the mess Bush has placed us in because like I just said things take time. We no longer have any. Now go out get drunk, ignore the worlds problems and kiss someones sweet ass goodbye while theres time enough for that. Oh, and that guy who said write someting, anything. Well he's full of shit. This looks like crap and makes no sense but I'm publishing it anyways. So there.
"The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away."
"Ronald Reagan"
Asteroids Game Outside Link
Mummy Maze Outside Link
I Scare Myself
Floating Farms
Well today has been a Lest We Forget day. Seems the old page makes it's rounds again. I've updated it since it's conception. Dragged all the pictures to my server so I'm not thieving someone elses bandwidth. It's just that when I first did the page I didn't know it would become this popular, and wanted to give credit to the web sites I found the files on. While I enjoy people coming to see my page, I am kind of sad that again it is at some other Americans loss. Again I wish to reiterate that the people responsible are nothing more than murderers. They hide behind mask because they fear repercussions. They claim they are doing God's work, But last I checked God has no need of mask. To glamorize what they do as anything other than cold blodded murder does a disservice to not only other Americans but to Muslims world wide. But the shame of the Muslims is that many support these actions as something political, or religious, and do not recognize it for what it is. Murder plain and simple. While I am willing to speak against my country for wrongs committed, I am unwilling to defend murderers. Any sympathy the Muslims, Al Queida, and the Plaestinians has been squandered with these acts as clearly as Bush squandered world sympathy by attacking Iraq instead of Saudi Arabia which churned out 15 of 19 highjackers, along with the lions share of the financing to Al Queida. But I'm off to get drunk and try enjoying what's left of my weekend.
"If we love our country, we should also love our countrymen."
"Ronald Reagan"
Guy Porn Outside Link
Girl Porn Outside Link
Le Kiki Game Outside Link
Swordsman Outside Link
Lest We Forget
New Hostage
Another day in paradise begins for me. While people who worked at union jobs, with union wages get to come here and retire thanks to those union wages, I am left grubbing for a bare existence. Two broken down vehicles. Two broken TV sets. A falling apart house. Work clothes I get from used clothing stores. No health insurance. And no real hope of ever living the good life or American dream from hard work. I'm very cynical about our future in America. I tend to get angrier and crankier when I haven't been to the drumcircle in awhile. Can you tell? Tommorow will be the first chance I'll have to do some serious blogging and research for the coming week. So you come back tommorow. Oh. And I'll have the weekend Porn links. We all know these office people who visit during lunch time just come to look at Porn and play games, but I don't mind. Other folks will keep making more, and I'll gladly go dig it up for you.
"No government ever voluntarily reduces itself in size. Government programs, once launched, never disappear. Actually, a government bureau is the nearest thing to eternal life we'll ever see on this earth!"
"Ronald Reagan"
Hurricane Outside Link
Splinter Outside Link
Movie Reviews
Mansions
Sorry for no update yesterday, and a hastely thrown together one today. Works really taking it out of me. Late hours at night. Waking up early. Chores. Family life. Seems this whole week is packed solid with things that have to be done, leaving no time for things one would like to do. I want to throw a shout out to Blah3 for throwing some hits my way. Thanks. And ain't I an ass for not updating right afterwards. Got another hit from the DOJ. This time they actually Googled up "about drunken monkey". Seems they were looking for something in specific. Another shout out to Rick over at Radically Inept. I had mentioned a possibility of an Everglades land grab scheme. Since then I saw a aerial photograph of plot boundries after the preposed flooding. Looks alot like someones gonna make alot of money. Dig into it for a story to embarass Jeb Bush. I already told you I'm not an investigative reporter. The story is there. One of you go dig it up, lay it out, get famous already. Lets hope I have some time tommorow. I mean I've been too tired to even read my blog roll lately.
"Information is the oxygen of the modern age. It seeps through the walls topped by barbed wire, it wafts across the electrified borders."
"Ronald Reagan"
Bomb Bandits Outside Link
Terrain 2 Outside Link
New Hostage
Jessie James Hardy
I'm tired. Working hard. And blogging. But at least at the present I'm back to blogging because I want to. No sense of obligation, or need to try and compete in the Blogger of the Year award. I've a few links stuck off in a file that were waiting for the right phrases to stick them to, but I think it's time I just posted them. So without further ado here's my imitation of one of those "Feed Bloggers".
Sometimes porn goes to far. You really have to know where to draw the line. I draw the line at this.
Ever met, as far as you can meet someone through the internet, someone who just had a nack for being a jerk? Well some folks not only aspire to this they teach others. Jerk training 101.
This turned up an answer of "IXLNXS is spamming my comments section", or something like that. I remember the post. I kept track of my web movements by tracking the IXLNXS nick. The person who posted it had complained I "spammed" for posting to their blog once. Tis to laugh. But one has to ask, What Is it?
The above link was blatantly ripped off of this blog that just sent alot of traffic my way. Heck of a way to pay him back. Muhahahahahaha.
Everyone needs to see the Honks. To see them is to love them. To see them all is to wish there were more. Soon these may become the bubble gum cards of adults worldwide. Wait a minute. Adult bubble gum cards, with witty little comeones that transfer to your tounge. Hmmmmmm. But these cards won't be anything like that will they?
And like I have been telling people all along, religious groups worldwide are beginning to question if George Bush is the antichrist. Or at least one of his stupider pawns. This article from a very very trustworthy freelance journalist who has no reason to lie confirms that theory. Ignore these warnings at your own peril.
But that's all small news. The big news of the day? We made Time. Okay maybe not me. Or you. Or you, and you, and you. But we read someone who made Time. And now the hiring bonanza can begin. I'm accepting offers starting in the triple digets with perks.
And that's todays "Feed Bloggers" style posting. I can't wait to see how this looks. Crudy I bet, but who knows I may like it.
"It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first."
"Ronald Reagan"
Monkey Toss Outside Link
Lightning Break Outside Link
Jessie James Hardy
Sick
Rained too hard to make it to the drum circle tonight. Instead we're doing family movie night. Leaves no time for you my dedicated readers. So I'll give you this. Enjoy. Fair warning folks. Ad Ware is everywhere. Put a condom on your connection because nothing is safe out there anymore.
"It's true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?"
"Ronald Reagan"
Urban Slug Outside Link
Cavern Raid Outside Link
Stripping
Graphs
I'm drunk so I'll do a link dump. This site is "Coming Soon". I stole their background for my desktop wallaper. It's easy on the computer, and the mind. This guy thinks you should be able to make you own sign. Some are funny. I'm betting you can do better. Some insane clown is off desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan. See for yourself if you don't believe me. Some blogs get your attention on writer appeal alone. This is one of those blogs. While other web sites supply us with the dirt on the famous daily, and bloggers like myself merely leech off of their studious investigations. Let us give praise someone else is doing the leg work, and we're just the fount of knowledge. And with that I leave you with a Floridain tradition in the making. Peace out. See ya Sunday.
"History teaches that war begins when governments believe the price of aggression is cheap."
"Ronald Reagan"
Guy Porn Outside Link
Girl Porn Outside Link
Sloyd 3 Outside Link
Golden Arrow 2 Outside Link
Stripping
War Room
Lest We Forget
New job. Waking up alot earlier in the mornings, and getting back kinda late for a few days makes for little hot links in this group. I would love to tell you about the "hot" new news topic, but let's face it. The only news is ronald reagan's death, and since the Republicans haven't been able to find any decent heroes lately, they're gonna milk this for all it's worth.
"To sit back hoping that someday, some way, someone will make things right is to go on feeding the crocodile, hoping he will eat you last, but eat you he will."
"Ronald Reagan"
Fireman 2 Outside Link
Pharaoh's Tomb Outside Link
Grave Dancer
PETA
I would like to report on some news, but it all seems buried under Reagan's death. All eyes on the passing of a great man. Honoring the dead like no other nation. The evil me, inside, buried beneath respect of death and passing, says what a fine time to legislate or pass laws that people might question. Smoke, mirrors, magic.
"We're in greater danger today than we were the day after Pearl Harbor. Our military is absolutely incapable of defending this country."
"Ronald Reagan"
Chainz Outside Link
Quest For The Rest Outside Link
Is It
Clueless
FAB
I have to go pee. No really. I told myself I would write this whole piece while having to go. Hey I don't have an editor breathing down my neck so I have to create my own pressure. Gonna link a blog or two. Heck maybe three. Then I think I'll relieve myself. What? You think blogging about the need to urinate is silly? What about all those cat blogs out there. Those damnded cats. Evil vile creatures sending their cat telepathy deep inside our brains. Beware all cats folks. Pussy can be dangerous.
"There are some jobs in which it is impossible for a man to be virtuous."
"Aristotle"
Astro Pop Outside Link
Gravity Ball Outside Link
Do It
Going Biblical
I started to hate politics and politicians when I realized how much they lied to us. How the lying has become soo acceptable that they barely even try anymore. At noon in Washington you'll find any number of politicians willing to argue the nightness of the issue for money. I'm tired of hearing the lies are in our best interest, or national security. I for one want the truth. I for one want justice. I for one want my country back. Vote for your country in 2004. Vote American. Vote your conscience. But please vote.
"The time is near at hand which must determine whether Americans are to be free men or slaves."
"George Washington"
Alien Shooter Outside Link
Surf's Up Outside Link
Media Owned
Food For Nukes
Anyone who knows me knows I just came home drunk from the drum circle, so the editorials are old news, and I'll update tommorow.
"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."
"Galileo Galilei"
Bushgame Outside Link
Battle Bots Outside Link
Online Heroes
The Money
My weekend is upon me. As usual I'll probably post light. It's the weekend and I'm not paid a dime for what I do. Regular readers will notice I have been recycling old post. Sorry. I do this for my own sake. Updating, and fixing the files as I go so they are readable. Be back after the weekend. Wednesday, Thursday at the latest. Also please notice my wife made me add Fredrick's of Hollywood. Enjoy.
"It is not the function of our Government to keep the citizen from falling into error; it is the function of the citizen to keep the Government from falling into error."
"Robert H. Jackson"
Guy Porn Outside Link
Girl Porn Outside Link
Medijate Outside Link
Nemo's Revenge Outside Link
Online Heroes
The Money
Friday. What happens today in the news is left all weekend to grow stale and boring. Soon to be forgotten with the advent of the new. The strands awaiting any willing the journey. But the task daunts all but a few.
"If we divine a discrepancy between a man's words and his character, the whole impression of him becomes broken and painful; he revolts the imagination by his lack of unity, and even the good in him is hardly accepted."
"Charles Horton Cooley"
Primaton and Monkey Outside Link
Tontie Outside Link
Still At It
What The
My link line up has gotten rather large. I honestly cruise through almost all of them. Of late I haven't been making it all the way through daily unless I spend a full day reading. So for you my regular readers seeking truth, liberty, and distraction, I offer the links to left for your hours of reading pleasure. I'll be adding more as we go so may I suggest bookmarking this page. As to those who complain of bandwidth. Hey, you want entertainment with low bandwidth? Fine check out Captain Low Rez then. But if your coming to find hours of online reading, games, distractions, and PORN, well you've come to the right place.
"Better to die on one's feet than to live on one's knees."
"Emiliano Zapata"
Captain Low Rez 1 Outside Link
Captain Low Rez 2 Outside Link
Captain Low Rez 3 Outside Link
Blocked Possibly
Treason
Well happy to say I made it to the "H's" before it was time to update. During my journey I realized how like Frank Burns of M*A*S*H fame our beloved president is. Also how like Hawkeye Pierce the Democratic contender is. Would someone please photoshop this picture to reflect that?
"The greatest pleasure is in defeating one's enemies and watching their families cry, then laying down with their wives and daughters"
"Ghengis Khan"
Alchemy Outside Link
Hawker Outside Link
Working
Did I Mention
Ever get that feeling the CIA is watching you and you know inviting them in for coffee is considered rude? Well come in outta the cold old chap. No strangers here.
"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."
"Voltaire"
Find The G-spot Outside Link
Pipedown Outside Link
Memorial Day
The Beaten Drum
"I don't wanna work. Just wanna bang on the drum all day."
Drunken Monkey Style Blogging
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