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President Bush's call to jury duty has put him in somewhat of a bind. John Kerry (a US Senator from Massachusetts) was called and served just recently, and was even chosen as the Jury Foreman after reminding his fellow jury-members that he had won three purple hearts in Vietnam. But it remains to be seen when the President will be able to fit jury duty into his busy schedule, now that he his giving almost daily speeches as to why we must stay the course in Iraq. "That's a lot more than just sitting around and capping ketchup bottles or polishing military medals", said Karl Rove of the President's schedule. "If John Kerry were sponsoring a bill in the Senate, that would be a different matter. Different for him, and different for the Democrats." Kerry later responded that "No Democrats have actually called for a specific date for the President to serve jury duty, but rather for him to develop a plan with specific benchmarks as to how he will do it, and then tell the American people." ************************* Nevada Senator Harry "Wildman" Reid's announcement that Osama bin Laden had been killed in the Pakistan earthquake was a hot topic in the blogosphere as well as on the talk shows this week. Appearing on the Nevada News Makers show, Reid claimed to have been "told today" that Osama was probably dead, but he did not cite the source of his information. Speculation included that it was the CIA that told him, thereby making the announcement a security breach, which most Republicans hoped for. A more likely source, according to Reno's NEWS 4, was an early morning conversation among old coots who meet daily at Maggie's Coffee Shop in Reid's hometown of Searchlight. Meanwhile, Karl Rove was recommending an investigation by Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald to determine who, if anyone, was responsible for leaking classified information regarding bin Laden's death. ************************ The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals on Friday ruled that "...the use of pictures, costumes, or any other replicas of Santa Claus in public places is a clear violation of the Constitution's Establishment Clause", according to the San Francisco Chronicle. "Inasmuch as the concept of Santa Claus is a derivative of the Christian religious legend of Saint. Nicholas, its further use constitutes a subtle preference for one religion over others", said Judge Grinch, a member of the Court. The ACLU quickly applauded the Court's decision. "For years, socially conservative parents have been using Santa Claus as a means of controlling the behavioral patterns of their young children. This violated the children's civil rights in that outright fraud was used in a system of reward and punishment, thereby preventing them from using their own judgment as to what is proper behavior. Even worse, as many of these children grew older, their self-esteem was destroyed when they discovered that they had been manipulated during the first five to ten years of their life." The Court's Ruling was the result of a lawsuit brought by activist Michael Newdow against the Salvation Army over the use of Santa Claus impersonators who stand outside of major stores, ringing bells and seeking donations. Newdow claimed that the Santa suits created acute stress for people who are still not sure if failure to make a donation might result in not getting what they want for Christmas. ********************* Congressman Jack Murtha is telling everyone who will listen that the Army is "broken" and "living hand-to-mouth". Meanwhile, FOX News is reporting that we just sent al Qaeda's No. 3 man on his way up to meet his 72 virgins, while Osama and al- Zawahiri are living in Pakistani caves, unable to do much if any terrorizing. Are you sure that you are looking at the right army, Mr. Congressman? Here's a clue. Our soldiers are NOT the ones who look like they should be standing on a street corner holding a sign that says "Will work for food". And tell your friends over at MoveOn.org, they are not the ones wearing shorts, either. Instead, they are the ones standing tall and proud, while asking, "What are those nut job politicians in Washington doing?" Just ask a few of our soldiers. You should be able to recognize them now, Mr. Congressman. ********************* The War on Terror has brought many new acronyms into the English language. One such acronym is "IED", which stads for "Improvised Explosive Device". The latest, however, is "ISID", which stands for "Impulsive Self-Imploding Democrats". ********************* |
If you haven't seen them already,
Also, see "I Can't Wait 'Til 2008" at flowgo.com Finally, we recommend and What Kids Say About the Elections Some things never change. Check out this old movie clip.
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