Skater Journal Entry  

Today I want to focus on converting random energy to purpose-driven energy. I'm beginning to see that my inefficiencies in life are not about a lack of energy, but are instead about a lack of appropriate motions for building and maintaining momentum. I have the knowledge and skills necessary to accomplish my goals. I even have dedication and focus and perseverance. It's my approach to accomplishing my goals that has been my greatest obstacle.

I am slowly reading through a pretty cool book called "Body Mind Mastery" by Dan Millman. Have you read it? Great stuff. He mentions in one area that we spend lots of time focusing on what we are good at because it's the most rewarding. There's nothing wrong with that, but it can keep you blind from the areas that could really use a little attention. With skateboarding, there are two giant hills that I have been stressed out about in the back of my head. I haven't conquered them, but I've conquered the rest of the 27 mile trail. Those two hills, along with stamina, are the only things standing in my way of successfully riding the entire trail without touching the ground. Stamina is easy. It's the hills that have worried me. I want to focus on these areas that are getting in the way of my success. I want to focus on developing a strategy for overcoming my difficulties. I want to seriously focus on persistent focus on the accomplishment of a goal.

The coincidences that have happened in the past couple weeks have been unbelievable. I feel like there are some giant shifts of energy going on in my awareness- it's like going down a giant hill on my skateboard, just building up this intense momentum that is incredibly powerful. The way the trail is laid out, though, is that whenever there is a good downhill like that, there is always an equally difficult uphill on the other side. All this energy is coming to me right now, every day building. I know that I need to harness it, redirect it to my purpose, and convert it to meet my purpose.

Obviously right now, my focus is pretty much exclusively on skateboarding. I am doing it and writing about it and dreaming about it and talking about it. My life is absorbed with it, and every experience I am having is interpreted through it. When I watch people walking down the street, what I see is their efficiency of motion. When I hang out with inspired people, a conversation feels like jumping on a trampoline. When I hang out with uninspired people, it feels like being 100 pounds overweight, and jumping on the sidewalk.

I'm not making a penny this summer, and that certainly has its repercussions on family life. But here's my total leap of faith- things are coming together, and I've felt this before- right when something huge was about to happen. I feel like I'm about to be sucked into some giant black hole of consciousness, only to be spit out on the other side, my soul stripped buck naked except for a raw unfiltered capacity for pure experience. I don't care if I get burned or broken or die along the way. This is my purpose, and it's what I want.

This whole thing is absolutely crazy. But this weird little deal has become my philosophy and my language and an incredible teacher. I feel like nothing I could ever write could express my soul as well as a one hour ride across whatever terrain lies beneath me.


©Dec.2004, derek munson