Objects in the Mirror...

Jeffrey Butts

Last week the email started making the rounds between me and the three GTS'ers that used to live near one another in the the same Northeast Portland Grant Park neighborhood. Now only Kelly Sweeney lives there. Russ Lindborg and Don Harrison have moved their families over to the west side of town. I included Diana Patterson in the mailings as well. Although once a resident of the west side herself, she has since forsaken suburbia for the Columbia River community of Scappoose, but she is a hot rod aficonado regardless of homestead. Anyway, Don was trying to round up a posse for a trip to the fifty-first annual Portland Roadster Show. When it came down to game time, it was just Don and I that went. Kelly and Becky had a free plane ticket to go and visit their oldest son, Joe, in Florida. I don't really understand the attraction of 70 degrees and sunshine when you could be in Oregon, but you've got to see family when you can! Russ and Lucia had their daughters home from college for the weekend and so he was likewise occupied. Diana did not get my email in time to be able to respond. So, around 1PM on Saturday, Don drove up to my house in his beautiful Boxster S and we headed downtown. This show is sponsored by the Multnomah Hot Rod Council, an affiliation of a dozen SW Washington and NW Oregon car clubs. The original show was held in November of 1956 at the National Guard Armoury on 10th and Couch Streets in the near East side. These days the show is in the well lit, warm, and comfy Convention Center. The classes of vehicles entered were too numerous and confusing for me to decipher and so I will just give you the highlights as we saw them.

The display hall is set up in a roughly equidistant "L" shape and you enter on the outside of the center corner. We elected to view one half at a time, taking a brief food break in between. Actually, it was me that wanted to take the break, Don was smart enough to have eaten beforehand. While he quaffed down a beer, I endured a bad sandwich. Next year I'll be smarter and eat something before I go. The outside perimeter of the display hall is where vendors are set up to ply their wares. I can only assume their product quality is not any worse than the food booths. The display cars are in sections along the inside. I don't yet know how they determine who gets what sized spot. Some shared a rectangle with other cars, some clubs had a rectangle of their own, and some folks just had a whopping big thingy of their own. For those with their own display area, the surroundings were as important as the car on display. Oh sure, there were those little child-sized mannequins that were leaning on many a bumper, "virtual sobbing and sulking." There were also a half dozen drive-in diner window trays with fake burgers, fries, and shakes. Others, however, were quite extensive. Several guys had lighting effects ranging from multi-colored spots on and in the car to neon highlights. The winner in the HGTV category had to be the guy with the Jeep sand rail. His rectangle had sand spread all over it (but well contained from the neighboring displays) including sand on the tires and little pieces of driftwood here and there.

One of the many categories of cars available to see were those sponsored in club entries. Early on we walked up to the Datsun (no, not Nissan) corral. There were a couple of wonderful looking 240Z's including this 1973 blue one (photo left). The car was very straight, skipping the all too present fad for big wheels and low profile tires. His paint job was well prepped and looked like a million bucks. You could tell that the car was a "driver" too, always good for extra points in my book. Certainly my pick of a very nice litter. There were at least two other 240's and a couple of nice Fairlady 2000 roadsters. Oh yeah, there was a hideous 280Z. Not that it wasn't taken care of...points for that...it just looked bloated next to the blue car. "Does this paint make my butt look fat?"

Another category were cars in the High School Challenge. These represented a wide cross section of preparation and of style. There were cars ranging from the ricers to Daddy's Z-28. We saw mundane 70's sedans including a Charger that was Kermit the Frog green and apparently painted with a broom. Probably most typical were the step-side pick-up trucks. I'm glad to see that high-end car shows like this have room for entries of this level. I'm pretty sure that these entries would never be allowed in a High School category at the Forest Grove Concours.

Another brand well represented were the Shelby cars. There were at least a half dozen Cobras (all later model reconstructions) including two Daytona coupes. More impressive were the Mustangs. It was very telling to see the differences between the old and new cars. Certainly the new 'Stangs are very safe and have outstanding performance characteristics but they lack the aesthetic of the older cars. There were a half dozen or more of the standard 1960's notch backs, convertibles, and fastbacks but there were two cars parked close to one another that really highlighted the difference. On the one hand was a late model (2006) fastback. By comparison, an original 1965 GT350 nearby looked sleek and refreshing. Whereas the newer car had the same general styling cues, it was shaped more like a suppository when viewed in silhouette. The older car, with straight panels and simpler curves, sat lower, looked lighter, and would be a winner if I was the judge. Clean, you know what I mean? While we're in the Ford corral, I should mention that they had a couple of the bigger performance Fairlanes. Back in my college days I didn't like these hopped up family cars. Sure, they were muscle cars but they didn't seem as sporty as the Goats and 'Cudas. Now, in my AARP years, they have a certain appeal. There was a big block 1966 model in the show that I would have been happy to drive away.

There were other muscle cars worth mentioning too. Mopar was well represented with a handful of Barracudas, Chargers, and Challengers. The General was represented with GTO's ranging from the mid-1960's to "The Judge" and Chevy's in abundance. Among the Nomad's and the ever popular 55-56 was a well maintained 1960 Impala. I told Don, "I could see myself in that car." Of course, I told him that about the Fairlane as well. You cannot talk GM and car shows without mention of Corvettes. They had a corral too, from a club in Vancouver, but most of the vintage cars were tarted up in garage queen style, apparently never setting a tire on actual pavement. Mind you, this is being typed by someone who has done the Q-Tip route before. I actually LIKE cars that are well detailed but I really don't like something that is always in the garage...when it is not even broken (note that this last comment provides a great loophole for the four years I owned the Bonneville).

One display featured a variety of cars from the LeMay Museum in Tacoma. The original collection owned by Harold and Nancy LeMay was the largest privately owned collection in the world. Don suggested that this might be a great place for GTS members to see. You can read about it by clicking on this link. Other interesting cars included a Crosley Hot Shot. Only 2500 of these cars were built from 1948-1952. With a stunning 26HP out of an overhead cam four, this was the Bugeye Sprite ten years ahead of its time. This one was for sale too (but looked like a garage queen).

For sure, the guys who do these shows know how to paint. Great flame jobs. Deep, fathoms deep, paint colors. Sometimes the auto-focus on my camera would not work because there was nothing solid to define. That brings us to what had to be the "Best of Bling" category. This car was something else. The car has a name: Livin' Large. It is a yellow, and I mean ALL yellow 1995 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham. Sportin' the small whitewall tires and basket wires, it is set up with hydraulics and a huge sound system. From the Continental kit on the back to the rhinestone studded grill, this baby is king of the pimp cars. Yellow? Did I say yellow? Mirror tiles underneath show that the entire frame and undercarriage carries out the theme. The slide back fabric moon roof is, you guessed it, yellow. Just below the waistline there is a broad striped mural of buxom babes. This car was built by the Liquid Assets car club. It's the biz. What up, Homes?

When the warm weather hits this part of the country, the cruise-ins and car shows start and the little guys get their rods and customs out onto the asphalt. They drive them into places like the Aloha DQ or larger shows like the ones in Sherwood and Gaston. But when it's raining, there's no reason that you can't see it all in one place, under cover, warm, and with bad food and good company. I hope some of the rest of you guys can make it out there with us next year.