Cow Jokes!!

What's a cow's favorite city?

Honamoomoo, Haywaii or Milkwaukee, Wiscownsin are favorites. Then there's Pittsburger and Harrisburger, Moo York, and Chicowgo.

Who's the cow heavyweight champion of the world?

Milk Tyson, used to by Cowscious Clay

What does a cow do after writing a book?

Has it cowpywrighted

What are a cows favorite classes in school?

Cowculus, psycowlogy, moosic, thermoodynamics

Where do smart cows go to school?

Cowlumbia

What happens when a cow stops shaving

Grows a Moostache

What do cows eat in greek restaurants?

Shishcowbob or cowlbasa

What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?

Cowboom

What's a cows favorite basketball shoe?

Cownverse

What did cows used to call the ruler of Germany?

The cowser

What do cows usually fly around in?

Helicowpters and Bulloons

What does one call a red cow?

Either Cowmunist or Cowmrade

Who is a cows favorite cowmposer?

Some like Mootzart, others like Tchaicowfski

What religions are cows?

There are Cowtholics, Episcowpaliens, Moothodists, and some are mooish.

What do cows do on a Saturday night?

They go to the moovies, or the discowteque.

What kind of haircuts do punk cows like?

Moohalks

What do cows like to do at amoosement parks?

Ride on the roller cowster

What games do little cows like to play?

Moonopoly, or cowps and robbers

What kind of cowfee do cows like?

Decalfinated

What kinds of moosic do cows like?

Mootown, Mootzart (Amoodeus), the moos, moo wave, the moody moos

What kind of locks do cows use?

Cowmbination locks

What's a cows favorite Olympic event?

The mooathon. Also the discowse and the calf mile.

What does one call a cow who sleeps around?

A bull dozer.

What does one call a cow who talks down to other cows?

Cowndescending.

What does one call a cow who just does what all the other cows do?

A cownformist.

Who is a Cow's favorite Astronomooer?

Nicholai Cowpernicus.

How would you get a cow in your car?

If you promise to let her steer.

What do you call a herd of cows in a psychiatrists office?

An encownter group.

What would you call a Post Apocolyptic Bovine?

A Mootant.

Did you hear the one about the Texas Longhorn who defected to the USSR?

He just wanted to live in Mooscow.

Where do the hep cows hang in Paris?

Moolin Rouge.

Cow's favorite Dickens opus?

A Christmoos Cowl".

Definition of a Moocher: a selfish cow.

What do cows call an act of god?

Bovine Intervention.

I thought that these jokes were originals, but then someone showed me a book called "Steer Wars" (i.e. what do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?) which was written in 1979. So I don't tell cow jokes as often.