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Mississippi Straddle
FEEDBACK - Oh Yes Please -You can email docwho2000@hotmail.com
Title: Mississippi Straddle 1/6
Author: docwho2100
Fandom and Pairing: Nikki/Nora - F/F
Timing: Takes place after the TV pilot and after the stories "I Want Them" , "Dark Lady", "Firsts" , "Seconds" and "Delaney C.O.D. or D.O.A."
Rating: R - NC-17
Disclaimer: Nikki & Nora are the property of Nancylee Myatt and Warner Bros. Television. No infringement intended.
Authors' notes:
I, thankfully, am not claustrophobic, I am too small to worry about small spaces ;P but I know people who are. While I am not quite accurately portraying the condition - it is an amalgamation - it has some ring of truth to it, I hope. Please, if you do have symptoms, send me a holler and let me know how well Nora's condition is described and what might be better changed and even if you want to just chatter on about the adjustments you have to make.
The name of the boat, Lundi Gras - is named after a nice ritual associated with the landing of a boat. Lundi Gras - http://www.experienceneworleans.com/glossary.html However, the term really did not come into play again until the 1980s - so since this is the 100th year, what was the boat they cruised on before called? That you will have to guess or I leave to you - name a boat - have some fun - why make me do all the work 
OK this really piggybacks on the story "Delaney COD or DOA" - so reading at least that one will help, although there are little things that hinted at events to play out here in many of the other stories in the series.
Lastly, the title has many meanings, I'll put some of the research links and poker stuff up in other chapters 
So what meaning did you think of first when reading the title >; )
Character thoughts appear between ~ ~ symbols
Chapter 1
July 2004 - about three weeks after the story Delaney COD or DOA
"Nikki. It is so good to see my little Bella in here again."
"Janice, hello." Nikki Beaumont stood, placing the magazine on the table with the other periodicals, turning just in time to be swept up in a hug followed by a kiss on the cheek.
"I am so glad you called. I've been remiss in calling on you and your father. The practice has been swamped. I think everyone in Nola is having a breakdown this summer."
"You know, you are one of the few people who I can make a joke about going crazy being good for business."
The older woman winked at Nikki, "Indeed. I think this shift to reality programming on the cable channels has spurred the latest clamor for my services. Everyone now is an expert on what neurosis or condition they must have. I have been looking to the TV guide to see what this week's topics are just so I can prepare for what my clients will be detailing on about the following week. I am writing a paper on this subject for the fall AMA conference."
Both women laughed as Janice ushered them back, pausing at the receptionist desk in her front office. "Jackson, hold all my calls."
The young man nodded, his gaze directed to Nikki, "Yes ma'am."
As they moved down the small hallway, Nikki could not help but look back, noting the receptionist was still watching. She smiled and gave him a cute wave, causing the man to blush as he looked down, shuffling some papers on his desk.
"How is the new staff working out?"
"Jackson? He is a young whippersnapper fresh out of the local university and full of fire to save the world." Janice laughed as she waved Nikki into her office.
"And he has an eye for the ladies," Nikki teased.
"He does know how to appreciate beauty when he sees it."
Nikki blushed a little as she made her way to an oversized loveseat, sinking into the plush seat. "I use to love your chairs. I would just be swallowed up in them when Daddy and I would come for our sessions."
"I caught a certain young lady bouncing on them a few times as well," the psychologist replied with a mischievous wink as she sat in the arm chair adjacent to where Nikki had settled.
"Well, it was a period of change and adjustment," Nikki replied, trying to defend her actions.
Janice nodded in a serious manner, "It was, for everyone, a light was lost when your mother died."
Nikki swallowed, looking down at the arm of the loveseat, her fingers sweeping back and forth in a random pattern. "I know."
Janice gave a few beats of silence, allowing Nikki to run through whatever thoughts may have been popping up. "So, tell me how are you, Arthur and Nora fairing?"
Nikki's head jerked up as Nora's name was said.
"I pay attention to many things my dear. Just as you need to find details and pay heed to nuances for your job, so to, do I. We just apply them in different aspects. I read the articles that came out a few weeks ago about the whole nasty blackmail. Followed by the articles about your partner's imprisonment and the, oh how did those titles go, 'Ignorant NOPD and Inept Law Officials'."
Nikki grimaced and nodded. "Yeah, it seems everything got a little twisted and fingers pointed in all directions."
"Well considering who was involved as a victim and the unfortunate circumstance that no one was caught, people love blood and are willing to take it from anyone. Plus the gossip columns and media do like a good show."
"I hate being center ring."
"Yes Nikki dear, but that is one place I doubt you will ever truly leave."
Nikki made an exasperated sigh as she leaned against the back of the loveseat.
"So, I received an invitation to the Debutante Cotillion. It's election time coming up again for Arthur?"
"It seems so far away, but I guess the political wheels start spinning now." Nikki's reply held a touch of glum.
"Are you going to be present or find a way to come up sick?"
"I have to go." Nikki's demeanor was reminiscent of a prisoner being lead to the gallows.
"I'll book a few appointments right before and after for you if you like. I know I always have a run on my services around that time." Janice's eyes twinkled as she joked.
"I'll suffer through; I might have an ally this time." Nikki replied, the memory of Nora's offer working its way through all of the other thoughts on her mind.
"Oh, really? This little gathering may be worth attending after all." She winked at Nikki, shifting in her seat a bit. "So Arthur is good? Busy?"
"Yes, a lot of work and development is coming through this summer and they are putting a lot of old laws to the test, which then echoes through all levels and offices resulting in mounds of paperwork and legal challenges and blustery speeches."
Janice nodded, "I've noticed. I just drove by another condemned property. It seems this town is being overrun by developers and construction folk."
"Yeah, well, it means a lot of people trying to meet and talk and get their two cents in. I've almost had to resort to making appointments to see Daddy."
"And is poor Arthur overwhelmed and drowning in forgotten appointments, trying to keep track of which end is up?" Janice knew the elder Beaumont had a bad habit of running late or missing appointments.
"Actually, he hired a new assistant a few weeks ago. She has been incredible and kept Daddy's office running full steam. She seems to be able to get him from point A to point B with no hitches."
"Good, Arthur needs someone to keep him in line and Lord knows sweetie you just do not have it in you considering you share his same curse."
"I think it magnified 100-fold when I got it."
Both women laughed.
As the laughter died down, Nikki took a breath, plucking at her slacks. "I'm glad you had some time to talk to me today. I, I was hoping to get some advice." She looked up, a pained expression mirroring her feelings.
"If this is about the Maskers charity tournament you are about to head out to, I am afraid I would not be very helpful. I do not know a straight from a flush from a floppy-whosit."
"You know about that?" Nikki asked, surprised by the mention.
"Come now, the 100th annual running of their poker tournament aboard the Lundi Gras is an event worth knowing about. Mix with that the return of a Beaumont to said tournament. Everyone is all atwitter with the news."
Nikki frowned as she thought about that. "I'd said yes before everything that happened with Nora."
"And I hope you are not asking if you should cancel your trip. Because that is a very evident no."
The corner of Nikki's mouth twitched a little as she remained quiet. Janice accepted the silence, letting it grow to give Nikki time to continue.
"I bullied Nora into going with me."
Janice angled an eyebrow upwards, a slight tilt of her head as she knew Nikki was finally getting round to what had brought the brunette and former patient back to her door.
"You will enjoy it, I've seen you play. You do carry your mother's talent."
Nikki smiled a little, "Thank you. I've heard stories, not many or near enough, it's hard to get people to talk about her. I think that's why I agreed to play, it was something she did. Well that and I really support the cause this year."
"I've already sent a check to the fund. I believe with what the tournament raises, the children's hospital will have enough to begin construction on the additional wing. It is sorely needed."
"Yes, plus, I do enjoy a good hand. It's been awhile since I really had a chance to test my skill. I don’t play as often as I use to…"
"Before meeting Nora?"
"Before everything, the force, Nora… things just spun to the left and I headed to the right." Nikki shrugged a bit knowing that was not an accurate description, but one that would suffice for now.
The older woman simply nodded, silent, her gaze warm and encouraging. With a sigh, Nikki continued, hopefully she was just seeing things, imagining things, hence her coming to see Janice.
"I've noticed a few things and I just... needed a sounding board. It's probably nothing, Nora is right I tend to get a little emotional here and there," she laughed a trifle trying to play off her words.
Janice cocked her head, still remaining quiet.
"Well, at first it was little things. Nora even more quiet than usual, which around others, I expect, but even at home she's been quiet. A lot of that is because, well, she started spending more and more time outside. Which I anticipated, but she's out in the courtyard almost dawn to dusk. And she's not been as active in going away from home or running or any sort of activity, well, wait, she goes to the gym a lot, but she doesn't do a lot else out. Which I thought would be the opposite as she'd get bored, Dan put her on medical leave and she has been home since the incident. She's suppose to return to work Monday."
"She's retreated?"
"In a sense, I mean she does not seem mopey or depressed, well on the surface. And when inside the house, she's always cleaning. I mean she has organized everything, every counter and surface is bare, nothing out. Except the closets, she's not touched those. Oh, yes, doors, she is always leaving doors open and when we are driving, down goes the window even when I want it up for the AC. And forget getting her on I-10 or any major highway, she seems to know the most backwater ways to any place we've had to go. I was curious if she really was consciously keeping the counters clear, so I put some stuff out the last few days, just to see, and darn if she didn't go and put everything away. I made a joke about her being like a little vacuum going behind me and sucking up everything, that joke did not go over too well."
"So sense of humor lost as well."
"Well, maybe, I have not tried many teases lately to test that theory. I like my head on my shoulders."
Janice shifted in her chair, crossing her legs. "So you've changed as well."
Nikki slowly nodded her head, a resigned look creeping along her face. "I just don't want to bring anything up that might, well, Nora's still having nightmares. The first week home, we couldn't go more than a few hours before she'd be awake. She started sleeping on the couch. Mainly because she'd be awake just sitting or trying to watch TV until finally the medicine or exhaustion would take her. She said she didn't want to keep me awake with the TV."
"Is the ceiling higher in the living room than your bedroom?"
Thinking a moment, Nikki tilted her head in the yes direction. "I think it is, why?"
"Just, curious, please, continue."
The brunette shifted in the loveseat, uncomfortable and trying to find a better position. "We've had more together time. I mean that is one good thing. I decided to take the last week off to try and spend more time with Nora. She immediately gravitated to me. I mean where ever I was, it would not be long before Nora was there too. I even tested it one day. I just quietly moved to the kitchen, pretending to do something. Pretty soon Nora came in and conveniently had to rearrange the pantry. So I moseyed on out to the courtyard, and soon Nora was there, cleaning up some newspapers she'd left. Back to the bedroom, and then there was Nora. She had to go through her clothes as some charity had called asking for donations. Of course she never asked if I wanted to put anything together... I just..."
Janice held her tongue, seeing Nikki struggle with something, the doctor had learned patience in helping to raise her seven brothers and sisters, a trait that held her well during sessions.
"Um, ok, one other thing. She, um, her hygiene," Nikki winced, feeling as if she were tattling on Nora.
Janice leaned forward a bit already an inkling of where this might be going.
"I mean she, kinda seems to, not shower often anymore. And I know I suggested a bath a few times, either us together or I could make one for her; she turned me down every time. I mean not that I am complaining, I love Nora, but it is summer in Nola and..."
"You can tell she is not following her normal routines and practices."
"Yeah, exactly. I even had to finally mention it. I swear she looked about to cry and said sorry and she'd be better. That was last night..."
"Well dear, You've just described, to a fair degree, symptoms of those diagnosed with claustrophobia. I could add more and you would probably agree," Seeing Nikki's look of doubt, "She's taken pictures and other things off the walls, rearranged the furniture to the edges and clustered them away from the doors so the rooms seem even more open. Stays to the edge of a room when there is a crowd. Might even go so far as to pace out a room to define the boundaries. Watch when she enters a room, her eyes immediately track to find the doors, then windows... exits for her to escape for when she might feel the need to flee."
Amazed Nikki could only shake her head yes.
"I would suspect there have been traces there before the burial," she paused seeing the pained look on Nikki's face, "Before the incident. It seems, rightly so, this has just magnified those traits and notions for Nora. Now, she's simply trying to put things back into place and tame her spinning world."
"Claustrophobics have hygiene issues?" Nikki wrinkled her nose a bit.
Laughing Janice shook her head, " No dear, well not directly. Let me ask you, your shower, describe it."
"Um, ok, well, it's, a shower only. It is a little small, because of the old architecture, it's one reason we love the bath. We are saving to renovate the house; the shower will be one of the places we redo. Um let's see, the stall is enclosed in a little alcove in the corner so only the door is clear. The rest is a dark color to match the scheme of the house. Um, it's all tile inside, a massage shower head to die for. I had that installed, I just love those hot pulsating jets. Nora and I have had a little fun with the shower head in the past." She trailed off, a fond smile slipping across her face as she was distracted for a moment.
"Well, before you need a cold shower," she paused as Nikki blushed. "So you are saying it is a small, enclosed space. The door is probably glass and a mottled glass so it is hard to see directly in, right?"
Nikki affirmed what had been said thus far.
"So it could look like, oh, say a wet, dirty plexiglass surface..."
The color drained from Nikki's face as she realized where Janice was leading her. "Oh god, it's... the box. The tile is a dirty bronze and swirly textured..."
"Dirt..."
The silence built up as Nikki lowered her face into her hands, overwhelmed at how she had not understood, how her partner had been suffering. What else was she missing?
"I don't know what to do Janice," Nikki's voice came out desperate, her helplessness at not being able to do something for Nora evident.
The psychiatrist steepled her fingers, putting the tips of her index fingers in her mouth as she thought about that.
"Well, there is the old adage time heals all wounds. But they neglect to tell you the length of time. She obviously does not respond well to therapy or similar approaches. I am guessing also since she hides things as it is from her family, this topic is another taboo for her as well."
"Oh yeah. Dan mentioned going over to the Delaney household a couple of times and had Mrs. Delaney approach him, worried about her daughter. Nora wasn't morbid or anything, just, was different."
"The little things you caught because you are around Nora more and in an intimate setting." She held up he hand seeing Nikki sit up to protest.
"By intimate I mean as partners and lovers, even if the physical intimacy has been, stalled."
Nikki winced as Janice said that; even if it was true, it hurt hearing it said out loud. She and Nora had been distant.
"So, you already had results when you finally stopped walking on eggshells." Seeing the detective's perplexed look, Janice clarified. "You bullied Nora to come on the trip."
"God, do I have to do that for everything? We had a fight about it, first one in a long while. Then she sulked for two days and because I did not let up and guilted her, she acquiesced."
"You might, but I recommend let's try that one more time. You said she goes back to work after this trip, so the dynamics will change once more. This may be the last time to have a close situation with Nora."
"Yeah, don't remind me. I know it wasn't a perfect holiday, but the down time was nice. It's been a…"
"Caustic year?"
"Janice, you have the gift of understatement."
"So here's what you do. Don't be yourself."
Nikki's eyes narrowed at this, trying to make sense of the command.
"Do something totally, completely unexpected, go outside of your boundaries, her boundaries and most importantly, the boundaries you have developed as a couple. I tend not to like flooding, I go for a more passive treatment like counter-conditioning. So maybe just a little push..."
"Come again?" Nikki's brow drew down as she puzzled over the comment.
"There are different methods of shock treatment Nikki dear. Let's try the non-electrical kind."
"Um, I do not like the sound of this."
"I am not certain this will work. I probably am crossing some professional and ethical lines, but I would say do something impulsive. Push Nora, see if you can help her reset. It will take her time to recover, that I can guarantee. But she needs to push past this first major shell so she stops associating the constrictive feelings with panic and anxiety. The longer she allows her brain to make those associations, the harder it becomes to disassociate."
Nikki sighed as she scooted to the edge of the seat. "So basically we are going to try kicking Nora's head out of her butt. She's already feeling vulnerable and now you want me to push her more. You know that sounds cruel Janice; you enjoy doing this don't you?"
"Of course, I am not the one there for the backlash."
Nikki used both hands to rub at her face, a smile on her lips as she removed her hands. "Fine, unexpected, I am going to have Nora and I pick out a new shower and have it installed while we are on the trip," her confidence wavered, "Do you think I can do this? Do you think it'll help Nora?"
"Yes, to both, I have confidence in you and Nora. Honestly I am surprised. I've worked with claustrophobics in clinic. When forced into a situation like she endured, many don't come back as far as Nora has already come. And many end up on medication or with other phobias that develop."
"Nora's so strong, I think I always took that for granted, thought she could not just save me but…"
"She could save herself… yes, well, we all need a little saving now and then. The shower is a start, the trip is a next step… just keep taking steps." Janice stood and held out a hand to Nikki.
Nikki took the offered hand, standing and hugging her friend.
"And don't lose yourself Nikki. You've been walking on eggshells and second guessing yourself. That is as bad as what Nora is doing. Yes, I know it is habit and instinct and you want to protect Nora and wrap her up and make everything ok. That's a good thing, in small doses."
"I need to get back to just being me. Mindful of what happened, accepting that things will be a little different, like taking the stairs more, but that we move on and focus on the next…. Step."
Janice rubbed Nikki's back, "By George I think she's got it."
"Oh I have it up here," Nikki tapped her head, "Now I have to make sure it is here." She patted her chest.
Opening the door, Janice shooed Nikki out, "Good, now skedaddle, you have a shower to pick out and a blonde to save."
She watched Nikki head down the hall, shutting the door after a moment. "And you were right Ms. Beaumont, you will have to kick her butt a bit, all the while making sure to keep yours in line. Not an easy time of it. I wish you luck my little Bella."
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