| Thursday, July 1, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Become senator, no experience necessary |
| Dave | A man who gets by on 16 hours of sleep a night |
| PostMonologue | Know Your Current Events/Mick Jagger mistresses... (beer cart girl) |
| Top Ten | Things You Don't Want to Hear from your Little League Umpire (with video) |
| 1st Guest | Calista Flockhart |
| 2nd Guest | Jack Hannah |
| Secret Word | Highhoeyazmuhoodhee |
| Kiss me | |
| Friday, July 2, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Frozen in time by volcanic ash |
| Dave | 6'2" jockey |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag |
| Top Ten | Least Inspirational Patriotic Songs |
| 1st Slot | Stupid Human Tricks (burning board breakers, fun things to do with a couch) |
| 2nd Guest | John Leguizamo |
| Music | Ziggy Marley & The Melody Makers |
| Secret Word | Pony |
| Try me Guido | |
| Monday, July 5, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Your place to win Aerosmith tickets |
| Dave | A simple country doctor who's delivered over 1000 babies |
| PostMonologue | Dogging it - highlights from the Late Show barbeque - Can you fry an egg on the sidewalk? |
| Top Ten | Other Skeletons in George W. Bush's Closet |
| 1st Guest | John McEnroe |
| Music | George Jones |
| Secret Word | Onehotmotherf***er (brought to you by Dan Quayle - He's Dumb.) |
| That ain't jello | |
| Tuesday, July 6, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Where dozens of ships & planes have mysteriously disappeared since 1945 |
| Dave | A man who can't decide between the compact spare and the regular spare |
| PostMonologue | Revisiting the Late Show neighborhood - How fast will a 45-lb block of ice melt? |
| Top Ten | Martha Stewart Tips for Beating the Heat |
| 1st Guest | Chris Rock |
| Music | Sixpence None the Richer - There She Goes |
| Secret Word | Neoprene |
| Ah, crabcakes | |
| Wednesday, July 7, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Still rationing tires, gas, and meat |
| Dave | The web's most popular search engine |
| PostMonologue | Late Show's Salute to America |
| Top Ten | Things This Guy is Thinking at this Moment (Pamplona guy gored by bull) |
| 1st Guest | Lindsay Davenport |
| 2nd Guest | Oliver Platt |
| Standup | Jeffrey Ross |
| Secret Word | Pestilence |
| Hey look, canaries | |
| Thursday, July 8, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | New non-stick coating wipes clean in seconds |
| Dave | America's most popular condiment, surpassing even ketchup |
| PostMonologue | Know Your Current Events/Preferred cuts of meat of monkey astronauts.... |
| Top Ten | Stores Least Likely to be Looted in a Power Failure |
| 1st Guest | Jay Thomas |
| 2nd Guest | Jason Briggs |
| Sitting In | John Mayall |
| Secret Word | Prick |
| Too much bacon | |
| Friday, July 9, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Once again the capitol of Germany |
| Dave | Switched-at-birth teenager |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag |
| Top Ten | Hillary Clinton Internet Screen Names |
| 1st Guest | Naomi Campbell |
| 2nd Guest | Jimmie Walker |
| Music | Lucinda Williams |
| Who's hungry? | |
| July 12 - 16, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| Monday | |
| Tuesday | |
| Wednesday | |
| Thursday | |
| Friday | |
| Reruns | |
| Monday, July 19, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | World's highest per capita folding chair ownership |
| Dave | Redesigned to elimnate wrist & forearm stress |
| PostMonologue | Summer Books |
| 2nd Bit | Dave Mirra EXTREME!!! bicycling on 53rd street |
| Top Ten | Ways I, Dave Letterman, am Conserving Energy |
| 1st Guest | Don Rickles |
| Music | Patty Griffin - Blue Sky |
| Secret Word | Sphygmomanometer |
| Cute pants, sister | |
| Tuesday, July 20, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| Preshow | Dave meets the US Women's Soccer Team |
| New York | Ask about our drug-resistant tuberculosis |
| Dave | The Caltech scientist who created the eavesdropping robot |
| PostMonologue | Three-time Secret Word champion Rita Buttgas |
| 2nd Bit | Lance Goza - EXTREME!!! skateboarder |
| Top Ten | Ways to Make the Muppets more Appealing to Teens |
| 1st Guest | Brandi Chastain & Mia Hamm & the US Women's Soccer Team |
| Standup | Jim Gaffigan |
| Secret Word | Pie |
| I smell gravy | |
| Wednesday, July 21, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Where it's always the running of the bulls |
| Dave | A man who's his own midseason replacement |
| PostMonologue | Ask Einstein's Brain |
| 2nd Bit | Greg Mancini - EXTREME!!! inline skater |
| Top Ten | Signs the Pressure is Getting to you While Pitching a Perfect Game (presented by David Cone) |
| 1st Guest | Matthew Broderick |
| Standup | Dennis Regan |
| Secret Word | Mommy (Brought to you by Hillary Clinton. She Loves NY.) |
| I'm frightened | |
| Thursday, July 22, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Immortalized by the poet Homer |
| Dave | A man who can't stop playing with his Tarzan action figure |
| PostMonologue | Know Your Current Events/Watch & Calculator Batteries... (learning about Mormons) |
| 2nd Bit | Dave at the original Woodstock |
| Top Ten | Things you don't Want to Hear from an Ice Cream Vendor (with video) |
| 1st Guest | Catherine Zeta-Jones |
| 2nd Guest | Buzz Aldrin |
| Music | Jamiroquai |
| Secret Word | Meehnkee |
| I crave salty foods | |
| Friday, July 23, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | We're taco-licious |
| Dave | A man who's not afraid to cry |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag |
| Top Ten | Announcements You're Most Likely to Hear at Woodstock |
| 1st Guest | Charles Grodin |
| Music | Alanis Morrisette |
| Secret Word | Throb |
| [...and then the cable went out] | |
| Monday, July 26, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Largest in the Channel Islands |
| Dave | Voice of your Pawtucket Red Sox |
| PostMonologue | Dave goes three minutes without cracking wise |
| 2nd Bit | Dave's performance at Woodstock |
| Top Ten | Signs the Ghost in your House Doesn't Give a Damn |
| 1st Guest | Ted Koppel |
| 2nd Guest | Isabella Rossellini |
| Music | Macy Gray |
| My brother's a jockey | |
| Tuesday, July 27, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Hotter than a stolen Trans-Am |
| Dave | Real-life Korn roadie |
| PostMonologue | Summer Camp Quiz |
| 2nd Bit | Pat & Kenny Read Oprah Transcripts (John Travolta) |
| Top Ten | Thoughts Going Through some Woodstock Moshing Guy's Mind at this Moment |
| 1st Guests | National Hollerin' Champions |
| 2nd Guest | Garry Marshall |
| Music | Los Lobos |
| Sitting In | Buckwheat Zydeco |
| Other | Biff at Woodstock 99, Frisbee Dog Cam |
| Goodnight Lois | |
| Wednesday, July 28, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Visit our website - urbandecay.com |
| Dave | Heat-seeking missile of love |
| PostMonologue | Rejected Commercial Characters |
| 2nd Bit | Biff helps people cross the street |
| Top Ten | Books in the NYC School System's Summer Reading List |
| 1st Guest | Samuel L. Jackson |
| 2nd Guest | Rita Wilson |
| Music | Pete Townshend & Eddie Vedder |
| ---- | |
| Thursday, July 29, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Where there's a light for every hooker on Broadway |
| Dave | Tonight's celebrity player |
| PostMonologue | Know Your Current Events/Akron City Government Employee of the Month....(college girl dating a kid) |
| 2nd Bit | Paul Schaffer's Countdown to the Millenium |
| Top Ten | Things Overheard at a Limp Bizkit Concert |
| 1st Guest | Bruce Willis |
| 2nd Guest | Heidi Klum |
| ---- | |
| Friday, July 30, 1999 | |
|---|---|
| New York | Beware! Dingos. |
| Dave | Russian aristocrat |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (Brought to you by AOL. We guarantee you'll get a hot chick.) |
| 2nd Bit | Bob Borden Goes Home |
| Top Ten | Drumrolls |
| 1st Guest | Lance Armstrong |
| Music | Barry White |
| Other | Paul Schaffer's Countdown to the Millenium |
| ---- | |