|
| New York | It's nice to be important, but less important to be nice |
|---|
| Dave | Winner of a MacArthur Foundation Dumb Guy Grant |
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| Campaign 2000 | Jerri Manthey (Surivor II loser) |
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| 1st Guest | Craig Kilborn |
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| Music | Warren Zevon |
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| Other | Late Show question on Family Feud |
|---|
| ---- |
|
| New York | Where the dream of reason breeds monsters |
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| Dave | Real-life crime scene investigator |
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| PostMonologue | Biff at Yankee's Spring Training |
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| 2nd Bit | The Tornado of Soup |
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| Top Ten | Effects of the Giant Solar Flare |
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| 1st Guest | Hugh Grant |
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| Music | Sade - King of Sorrow |
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| Kilts are not pants |
|
| New York | Se Habla Espanol |
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| Dave | TV news sleuth |
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| PostMonologue | Dumb Ads |
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| 2nd Bit | Farewell to Xena |
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| Top Ten | Least Impressive David Copperfield Tricks |
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| 1st Guest | Paul Reubens |
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| Music | Run DMC & Stephan Jenkins |
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| Other | Tornado of Fire disclaimer |
|---|
| Nice pants, sister |
|
| New York | The new CBS reality series |
|---|
| Dave | Head of the California Utilities Commission |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Know Your Current Events (health insurance) |
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| Top Ten | Signs Dan Rather Doesn't Give a Damn Anymore |
|---|
| 1st Guest | David Spade |
|---|
| 2nd Guests | Amanda & Jonny Schwebel (12-year-olds, interviewed Clinton, his next door neighbors) |
|---|
| Pantalonis |
|
| New York | Come an hour early to meet the dancers |
|---|
| Dave | Mexican debutante |
|---|
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Tornado of Fire Disclaimer - Circus parade |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Carson Daley |
|---|
| Standup | Jann Karem |
|---|
| Other | Paul Schaffer and the CBS Giant Orchestra |
|---|
| Biscuits 'n gravy |
|
| New York | As seen on television |
|---|
| Dave | Country crooner |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Lawrence of Arabia story |
|---|
| Campaign 2000 | Nick Brown (Survivor 2 loser) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Mike Krzyzewski |
|---|
| Music | Semisonic |
|---|
| ---- |
|
| New York | Legendary birthplace of cricket |
|---|
| Dave | The winningest horse in racing history |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Stephanie's Grand Prix photos |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Pat & Kenny's "It Kind of Sounds Like a Joke" |
|---|
| Top Ten | Signs Something's Wrong at the Gap |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Renee Zellweger |
|---|
| Music | Stephen Malkmus |
|---|
| Other | Spring cleaning |
|---|
| Pants!!!! |
|
| New York | Offices in all five burroughs |
|---|
| Dave | Host of MSNBC's Hardball |
|---|
| PostMonologue | George eats 1100 Cadbury eggs |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Tax Tips |
|---|
| Top Ten | Things the Chinese have Learned by Examining our Spy Plane |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Holly Hunter |
|---|
| Music | Idlewild - Little Discourage |
|---|
| Buy me some pants [mumbled] |
|
| New York | Hear the difference today |
|---|
| Dave | Britain's dashing young royal |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Celebrity Tax Tips |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Chinese perspective on Bush apology |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Tom Green |
|---|
| 2nd Guest | Dr. Geoffrey Marcy |
|---|
| Other | Gap ad - Dave's birthday |
|---|
| Do you like pants? [mumbled] |
|
| New York | Home of mad cab disease |
|---|
| Dave | AOL's customer of the year |
|---|
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (dog, easter egg hunt) |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Pat Farmer's Movie Review |
|---|
| Top Ten | Ways to Make Doing Your Taxes More Fun (presented by accountants) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | LL Cool J |
|---|
| Music | The Living End |
|---|
| My accountant is Fred Nigrow |
|
| New York | Statue of Liberty, The Empire State Building - ring a bell? |
|---|
| Dave | In a new stay-fresh, resealable container |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Where they Stand on the Issues |
|---|
| Campaign 2000 | Roger Bingham (Survivor 2 loser) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Liv Tyler |
|---|
| Music | Billy Idol |
|---|
| Other | Survivor interview montage |
|---|
| Pants are fun [mumbled] |
|
| New York | Known as Leningrad during the Soviet years |
|---|
| Dave | The genius with the idea of putting glitter in craft glue |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Beat the Clock (South Dakotan) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Billy Crystal |
|---|
| Music | The Bee-Gees |
|---|
| Worldwide Pants [mumbled] |
|
| New York | A pristine wilderness with vast oil reserves |
|---|
| Dave | Bankrupt Korean automaker |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Free items from the Gap |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | New Magazines |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Don Rickles |
|---|
| 2nd Guest | Jayson Williams |
|---|
| Other | George Clarke's new Gap commercial |
|---|
| Mmm mmm mmm |
|
| PostMonologue | Gorgeous Gap Girl (Melissa Bernheim) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Sylvester Stallone |
|---|
| Music | Green Day |
|---|
| ---- |
|
| New York | Somewhere between gummy & sticky |
|---|
| Dave | 500-year-old Incan mummy |
|---|
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag |
|---|
| 2nd Bit | Alan's Survivor III audition |
|---|
| Top Ten | Responses to the Question, How Fat is Al Gore? |
|---|
| 1st Guest | John Goodman (spring is here) |
|---|
| Standup | Jeff Stilson |
|---|
| Other | Gorgeous Gap Girl, Comedy Awards Letterman tribute |
|---|
| No dice, Kenny |
|
| New York | Do I know you? |
|---|
| Dave | A man who clicks here for the hottest sex sites on the web |
|---|
| PostMonologue | Vulgarity and On Golden Pond |
|---|
| Campaign 2000 | Elisabeth Filarski (Survivor 2 loser) |
|---|
| 1st Guest | Kirsten Dunst |
|---|
| Performance | Cirque de Soleil |
|---|
| Pants, the other white meat |
