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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Controversial Cult Leader |
| PostMonologue | More with Les |
| American Idol Loser | John Stevens |
| 1st Slot | Stupid Pet Tricks |
| 2nd Guest | David Spade |
| Music | Loretta Lynn and Jack White |
| Other | George W. Bush: Economic Expert, Kentucky Derby Announcer |
| Audience Shot | Let's Watch Late Show Costume Designer Sue Hum Lift Weights |
| I'm dizzy |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who can save you 40% on next winter's home heating costs |
| PostMonologue | Would You Like to Pretend to Be in an Earthquake? |
| 2nd Bit | Economics Nobel Prize Winner Robert Mundel Telling Yo Mama Jokes |
| Top Ten | Reasons I Did Not Win on Survivor (presented by Shian Wang) |
| 1st Guests | Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen |
| 2nd Guest | Adam Brody |
| Other | George W. Bush: Can You Say That? |
| Audience Shot | Alan Kalter's People Who Can Kick My Ass |
| Who wants gum? |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who's been celebrating Cinco de Mayo all week |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (assisted by traditionally Mexican-dressed Stephanie) |
| 1st Guest | Kate Beckinsale (learns to drive) |
| 2nd Guest | Sue Johanson |
| Other | Mariachi Band on the Marquee |
| The pants people |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Disgruntled employee |
| PostMonologue | Diving Dogs |
| 2nd Bit | Mother's Day Cards |
| Top Ten | Perks of Being the Oldest Woman in the World |
| 1st Guest | Tina Fey |
| 2nd Guest | Morgan Spurlock |
| Other | CBS counter-programs Friends, Leslie Stahl Reaction Shot of the Night |
| More pants, Chester? |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Curator of the American Museum of Office Supplies |
| PostMonologue | Audience Show & Tell |
| Top Ten | Pieces of Advice I Gave my Celebrity Child |
| 1st Guest | Kelsey Grammar |
| Music | Orchestra Baobob with Trey Anastasio and Dave Matthews |
| Other | George W. Bush Presidential Cough |
| Audience Shot | The Cape (with Bettie Lou Roberts) |
| We got pants for you |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | The man who coined the phrase Whoa, Nelly |
| PostMonologue | Biff Henderson's Fun With a Stopwatch |
| 1st Guest | Amber Brkich |
| 2nd Guest | Regis Philbin |
| Music | Black-Eyed Peas |
| Other | George W. Bush: Statesman, truncated motorcycle stunt |
| Yours, in pants |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who likes coffee hot and his theater cold |
| PostMonologue | Which CBS Personality is Eating the Corn Chips? |
| 2nd Bit | Is This Anything? |
| Top Ten | Ways Dumb Guys Would Lower Gas Prices |
| 1st Guest | David Hyde Pierce |
| Music | David Byrne |
| Other | George W. Bush: Where are You Sharon?, Dunkin' Donuts Coffee Ad, Tony Awards Announcements |
| Audience Shot | Why I'd Like to Work the Late Show Contest |
| Get new pants |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man known to the Navajo as Walks-Like-Duck |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (assisted by Stephanie Nightingale) |
| 1st Guest | John McCain |
| 2nd Guest | Tom Dreesen |
| ---- |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | The only name you need when you want the best in vinyl floor covering |
| PostMonologue | Stump the Band |
| Top Ten | Perks of Being on the Olympic Team (presented by Olympic team members) |
| 1st Slot | Stupid Pet Tricks |
| 2nd Guest | Hugh Jackman |
| Other | NBC Friends/Frasier Farewell Announcement, George W. Bush: Slick Finger Point |
| Audience Shot | 4am Show Ideas |
| Look at these pants |
| Opening | Staff asleep, Horse entry |
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who's been awake about 10 minutes |
| PostMonologue | Biff Spends a Night with NYPD |
| 2nd Bit | 4am Video Quiz |
| Top Ten | Good Things About Working at 4am (with video) |
| 1st Guest | Amy Sedaris (tour of her neighborhood) |
| Music | Modest Mouse |
| Other | Bob Borden Oversleeps, Staff Breakfast, Hunting for rats with Robert Sullivan |
| Audience Shot | The Cape (outside, with doorman) |
| Are you still up? |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who married a wealthy pet shop heiress |
| 2nd Bit | Eric Scott (rocket pack demonstration) |
| American Idol Loser | LaToya London |
| Top Ten | Rocket Man Pickup Lines |
| 1st Guest | Antonio Banderas |
| Music | Alanis Morrisette |
| Other | Meet the Press with Colin Powell |
| Audience Shot | Late Show Security Removes an Audience Member Just For the Fun of It |
| Cute pants |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | AARP Man of the Year |
| PostMonologue | Emil Costello teaches Rupert to cook a $1000 frittata |
| 2nd Bit | Tony Randall Tribute |
| Top Ten | Signs Your TV Show Won't be on the Fall Schedule |
| 1st Guest | Charlie Sheen |
| 2nd Guest | Jack Hanna |
| Other | Oprah on Pioneer House, Kerry Cicada Ad, George W. Bush Joke That's Not Really a Joke |
| Audience Shot | Alan Kalter's Why I Love to Work Here |
| Hey hey pants |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Heir to the Guiden's Mustard Fortune |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (assisted by Stephanie Armstrong) |
| 2nd Bit | Is This Anything? |
| Top Ten | Cool Things About Pitching a Perfect Game (presented by Randy Johnson) |
| 1st Guest | Kiefer Sutherland |
| Music | Incubus |
| Audience Shot | Who's in the Green Room? |
| Let's buy pants |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Bankrupt wholesale textile supplier |
| PostMonologue | Aerobatic Plane Stunts (Jamal Warner) |
| 2nd Bit | George W. Bush Slick Finger Point |
| Top Ten | Questions on the John Kerry Running Mate Application |
| 1st Guest | Kate Hudson |
| Music | Outkast - Roses |
| Pants for life |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who rolled over 317 cell phone minutes last month |
| PostMonologue | Audience Show & Tell |
| 2nd Bit | Will It Float? (lighter fluid) |
| Top Ten | Thoughts That Go Through My Mind at the Daytime Emmys (presented by Dr. Phil) |
| 1st Guest | Ellen DeGeneres |
| Music | The Strokes |
| Other | Grinder Girl injured |
| Audience Shot | The Cape (with Colin Quinn) |
| Hello |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Liquor-fueled brawler |
| PostMonologue | Who Said It? |
| Top Ten | Things Never Before Said on The Sopranos (presented by cast) |
| 1st Guest | Nicole Kidman |
| Music | Avril Lavigne |
| Other | Day After Tomorrow Ad, What the Hell is George W. Bush Talking About? |
| Audience Shot | On Air with Ryan Seacrest tickets |
| Hello pants |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Master carpet cleaner |
| PostMonologue | Breaking 500 boards in a minute |
| Top Ten | Signs Your Team is not Going to win the NBA Finals (presented by NBA legends) |
| 1st Guest | Dennis Quaid |
| Music | Velvet Revolver |
| Audience Shot | Dwight, the Troubled Teen |
| Aren't pants nice? |
|
| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | Junior industrialist |
| PostMonologue | CBS Mailbag (assisted by racer Stephanie) |
| 2nd Bit | George W. Bush: Know Your Iraqi Prisons |
| Top Ten | Questions I Asked Myself Before Casting My American Idol Vote |
| 1st Guest | Mandy Moore |
| 2nd Guest | Nate Erwin (cicada expert) |
| Audience Shot | I Have a Gay Idea for the Late Show |
| Counting Crows |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | The inventor of the liquid lunch |
| PostMonologue | Iraqi Timeline |
| 2nd Bit | Is This Anything?, George W. Bush Explains No Child Left Behind, Check in With Telemundo, A Moment with George W. Bush |
| Top Ten | Things You Don't Want to Here at a Gas Station (with video) |
| 1st Guest | Darrell Hammond |
| Music | blink-182 |
| Other | Fleet Week |
| Audience Shot | Total Eclipse of the Heart |
| Pick up your pants |
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| New York | The greatest city in the world |
| Dave | A man who wants to be your next county highway commisioner |
| PostMonologue | Stump the Band |
| 2nd Bit | Will It Float? (porterhouse steak) |
| 1st Guest | Andy Dick |
| 2nd Guest | Bob Woodward |
| Audience Shot | The Cape (with Vinny Fuvali) |
| Ha ha pants |