Q: How would you define a survivor?
A: A survivor is anyone who successfully navigates life's challenges. The stories we hear the most about are those of shipwrecks or mountain climbers surviving against all odds. But without a moment's notice, you may be called on to survive without ever leaving your home. You may get cancer. You may face divorce or business catastrophe. You may lose a loved one. All of those call on our deepest survival skills.
Q: What is the most important characteristic of the survivor?
A: To have a solid inner core. At heart, a survivor trusts himself and relies on himself. He or she is confident, but also humble. Survival is always a balancing act between opposing skills or forces. And when the crisis comes, he doesn't say, “Oh, my God, how could this have happened to me?” A survivor doesn't complain or blame others. He or she says, “Okay, what's the next right thing to do to get out of this? I know that there is always one more thing I can do, and I'm going to do whatever it takes. I'm going to do my best.” That's survivor thinking.
Q: How can I tell whether I'm a survivor?
A: You can start by looking at how you've reacted to adversity in the past. Are you adaptable? Do you rebound from setbacks quickly with the attitude that you'll learn and grow through this experience? Or do you spend a lot of time blaming others for what happens to you? Do you look back on hardship with bitterness, or do you cherish it as part of what has built your character? A victim–which is what I call someone who doesn't survive–tends to blame others and look outside himself for rescue, even from everyday difficulties. A victim slips on the sidewalk and looks around for someone to sue. A survivor says: That was careless of me. I'd better watch where I'm going. Ask yourself if you've struggled with adversity and prevailed with your sense of humor intact.
Q: What motivated you to dig so deep for these answers?
A: It began with my father's remarkable story of survival during World War II; he fell 27,000 feet without a parachute, behind German lines, and lived. I tell the full story in Deep Survival. But as I grew up, I was taught in school that reason rules our lives. Yet the behavior I saw around me contradicted that. Rational people did the most irrational things, and afterward, everyone would say, “What was he thinking?” But then they'd dismiss it. I guess I never dismissed it and kept on asking: Well, what exactly was he thinking? How can people do these things and still claim to live rational lives? The answer is: We don't. Our behavior and the outcomes it produces have much deeper explanations than that.
Q: Will reading Deep Survival give me a better chance of surviving? In the wilderness? A terrorist attack? Loss of job? A bad divorce?
A: Based on what I've heard from readers since the book came out, the answer is definitely yes. I have heard from everyone from cancer survivors to Navy SEALs, from firefighters to engineers who build satellites, that the principles and insights in Deep Survival speak to them at a deep level. Becoming a survivor is lifetime job. Each of us is unique but in surviving, we follow predictable patterns of behavior, emotion, and thought. Once you see those patterns, you can begin reflecting on how you live your own life, and if you can be honest with yourself, it becomes clear where you stand. It has been very gratifying to hear from readers all over the world who have used Deep Survival to push themselves from what might be a victim's role to that of a survivor.
Q: Doesn't luck or fate play a pretty big role in who lives or dies?
A: When I was doing a lot of work with Air Force and Navy pilots, they had a term for that type of accident. They said, “It's not your day.” In my experience, there aren't many “not-your-day” type of accidents. Most accidents turn out to grow from a series of little steps, little mistakes, little decisions–none of which is significant in itself–that eventually add up to a big catastrophe. In many cases, we have done the wrong thing before and gotten away with it, and that tells us that it's okay. If we do it enough times, we get in trouble. There was a recent bush crash in which 14 people were killed. Evidently, the bus driver was speeding, eating his dinner, and lost control on a rain-slicked road. He had undoubtedly learned from experience that he could go 70 or 75 miles an hour. He had also learned that he could eat while driving. He'd gotten away with it. But in doing that, he put himself at a critical point in his ability to control the bus, and it only took a tiny push to bring him to catastrophe–a distraction, for example, coupled with the rain-slicked highway. He died because he'd unconsciously made a series of little decisions. A lot of others died, too.
Q: Is it easy to predict who in a given group will survive and who won't? Are the traits obvious?
A: Well, if your ship is sinking and the guy next to you is screaming, “We're all gonna die!” that's a good indication that he might not make it. But in general, I'd say to stay away from people who are the extremely macho, Rambo types. And stay away from complainers, whiners. Look to people who have a sense of humor–especially about themselves–and a solid sense of who they are. People who make the most of the circumstances they're in, who accept it and learn from it, people who care about others–they tend to be the better survivors. After all, survival is nothing more than adaptation to the environment in which you find yourself.
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