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When Leo Tolstoy and his
brother were children, they created a club with a peculiar, almost impossible
initiation ceremony. In order to become a member, one had to stand in
a corner for a half an hour and not think of anything white.
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Mrs. Caroline Squires of Cincinnati filed for a divorce from her husband
in 1949 on grounds of desertion. She testified he'd stepped out "for
a beer" on the Fourth of July, 1917, and had never come back.
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The French national anthem, "La Marseillaise," derived its
title from the enthusiasm of the men of Marseilles, France, who sang
it when they marched into Paris at the outset of the French Revolution.
Rouget de l'Isle, its composer, was an artillery officer. According
to his account, he fell asleep at a harpsichord and dreamt the words
and the music. Upon waking, he remembered the entire piece from his
dream and immediately wrote it down.
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A law passed in Nebraska in 1912 really set down some hard rules of
the road. Drivers in the country at night were required to stop every
150 yards, send up a skyrocket, then wait eight minutes for the road
to clear before proceeding cautiously, all the while blowing their
horn and shooting off flares..
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George Lumley, aged 104, married Mary Dunning, aged 10, in Nortallerton,
England on August 25, 1783. She was the great-great granddaughter
of the woman who'd broken her engagement to Lumley, eighty years before.
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Crocodiles and alligators are surprisingly fast on land. Although
they are rapid, they are not agile; so if you ever find yourself chased
by one, run in a zigzag line. You'll lose him or her every time.
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After Albert Einstein had been at Princeton for some months, local
news hounds discovered that a twelve-year-old girl happened to stop
by the Einstein home almost every afternoon. The girl's mother hadn't
thought to ask Einstein about the situation until the newspapers reported
it, but when she got the opportunity after that she did so. What could
her daughter and Einstein have in common that they spent so much time
together? Einstein replied simply, "She brings me cookies and
I do her arithmetic homework."
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When the French Academy was preparing its first dictionary, it defined
"crab" as, "A small red fish which walks backwards."
This definition was sent with a number of others to the naturalist
Cuvier for his approval. The scientist wrote back, "Your definition,
gentlemen, would be perfect, only for three exceptions. The crab is
not a fish, it is not red and it does not walk backwards."
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Louis XV of France really was as an unpleasant a fellow as he's been
depicted. In 1674, when he was visiting a school at Clermont, he heard
from the school's authorities that one of the children, a nine- year-old
Irish lad named Francis Seldon, had made a pun about the king's bald
head.
Louis was furious. He had a secret warrant drawn up for the child's
arrest, and young Seldon was thrown into solitary confinement in the
Bastille. His parents, members of one of Europe's richest merchant
families, were told simply that the child had disappeared. Days turned
to months, months to years, and Louis himself passed away. But Francis
spent sixty-nine years "in the hole" for making fun of the
king's baldness.
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One
of the movie moguls the Marx Brothers had to deal with was Irving
Thalberg of MGM. Purposefully or not, Thalberg had the annoying habit
of making people wait outside his office for extended periods of time.
One time he kept the Marx Brothers longer than they liked. When he
finally got around to seeing them, he discovered they were stark naked
outside his doorway, roasting potatoes in the lobby's fireplace. It
was the last time he kept them waiting.
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Abraham Lincoln had no love for favor seekers, especially when they
took his time away from the duties of the presidency during the Civil
War. On one occasion, he gathered together a number of would- be-office
holders and told them this story:
"There was once a King who wished to go out hunting, so he asked
his minister if it was going to rain. The minister assured him that
it would not. On the way to the woods, the King passed a farmer who
was working the land with his donkey. The farmer warned the King that
it would rain soon, but the King just laughed and continued on. A
few minutes later it was pouring, and the King and his companions
were soaked to their skin. Upon return to the castle, the King dismissed
his minister and sent for the farmer. He asked the man how he knew
it was going to rain.
""It was not me, your Majesty. It was my donkey. He always
droops one ear when it is going to rain."
"So the King bought the donkey from the farmer and gave him the
position of minister at court. This was where the King made his mistake."
"How was that," asked several people in the audience.
"Because ever since then," Lincoln continued, "every
jackass wants an office. Gentlemen, leave your credentials and when
the war is over you'll hear from me."
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In 1400 B.C. it was the fashion among rich Egyptian women to place
a large cone of scented grease on top of their heads and keep it there
all day. As the day wore on, the grease melted and dripped down over
their bodies, covering their skin with an oily, glistening sheen and
bathing their clothes in fragrance.
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Half the foods eaten throughout the world today were developed by
farmers in the Andes Mountains. Potatoes, maize, sweet potatoes, squash,
all varieties of beans, peanuts, manioc (manioc?), papayas, strawberries,
mulberries and many other foods were first grown in this region.
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According to tests made at the Institute for the Study of Animal Problems
in Washington, D.C., dogs and cats, like people, are either right-handed
or left-handed --- that is, they favor either their right or left
paws.
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A person cannot taste food unless it is mixed with saliva. For example,
if a strong-tasting substance like salt is placed on a dry tongue,
the taste buds will not be able to taste it. As soon as a drop of
saliva is added and the salt is dissolved, however, a definite taste
sensation results. This is true for all foods. Try it!
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In eighteenth-century England, women's wigs were sometimes 4 feet
high. These remarkable head- dresses were dusted with flour and decorated
with stuffed birds, replicas of gardens, plates of fruit, or even
model ships. Sometimes the wigs were so elaborate they were worn continuously
for several months. They were matted with lard to keep them from coming
apart, which made mice and insects a constant problem. Special pillows
had to be constructed to hold these giant creations, and rat-resistant
caps made of wire were common. The wig craze died out quite suddenly
in 1795, when a hair-powder tax made their upkeep too expensive.
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Experiments conducted in Germany and at the University of Southampton
in England show that even mild and incidental noises cause the pupils
of the eyes to dilate. It is believed that this is why surgeons, watchmakers,
and others who perform delicate manual operations are so bothered
by noise. The sounds cause their pupils to change focus and blur their
vision.
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The Inca Indians of Peru considered bridges to be so sacred that anyone
who tampered with one was put to death. Among the most impressive
Inca bridges were the chacas, or rope bridges, that spanned great
distances over gorges and rivers. They were made of braided grasses
woven together into a single cable as thick as a man's body, and they
sometimes were 175 feet long. It took as many as a thousand people
to build such a bridge, and many of these remarkable structures lasted
more than 500 years.
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In the early 19th century the words "trousers" and "pants"
were considered obscene in England. Women referred to trousers as
"inexpressibles" or "a pair of dittoes." Later
in the century the taboo was carried to such lengths that piano legs
were covered up because they reminded people of their human legs.
In 1836 Charles Dickens wrote the following lines in Oliver Twist:
' I tossed off the clothes, got safely in bed,
drew on a pair of ________' "
" ' Ladies present, Mr. Giles,' murmured the tinker.
" ' _________ of shoes, Sir,' said Mr. Giles, laying great emphasis
on the word."
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Sports fans in Brazil sometimes become so excited that it was necessary
to build a wide moat around the playing field of Rio's 180,000-seat
Maracarña Stadium. The moat keeps the crowd from running onto
the field, molesting the players and attacking the referees.
Red rum, sir, is murder.
Ma is as selfless as I am.
Nurse, I spy gypsies. Run!
A man, a plan, a canal - Panama.
He lived as a devil, eh?
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The first automobile race ever seen in the United States was held
in Chicago in 1895. The track ran from Chicago to Evanston, Illinois.
The winner was J. Frank Duryea, whose average speed was 7½
miles per hour.
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In the memoirs of Catherine II of Russia, it is recorded that any
Russian aristocrat who displeased the queen was forced to squat in
the great antechamber of the palace and to remain in that position
for several days, mewing like a cat, clucking like a hen, and pecking
his food from the floor.
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The outdoor temperature can be estimated to within several degrees
by timing the chirps of a cricket. It is done this way: count the
number of chirps in a 15-second period, and add 37 to the total. The
result will be very close to the actual Fahrenheit temperature. This
formula, however, only works in warm weather. (Try it!)
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The Pekingese dog was considered sacred among Chinese royalty. At
the court of Li Hsui, one of the last Manchu queens, all court Pekingese
had human wet nurses. Each dog had its own human guard to protect
it from other dogs; some even had private palaces, complete with servants.
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An eighteenth-century German named Matthew Birchinger, known as "the
little man of Nuremberg," played four musical instruments including
the bagpipes, was an expert calligrapher, and was the most famous
stage magician of his day. He performed tricks with the cup and balls
that have never been explained. Yet Birchinger had no hands, legs,
or thighs, and was less than 29 inches tall!
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In Elizabethan England the spoon was such a novelty, such a prized
rarity, that people carried their own folding spoons to banquets.
(This was true, however, for only the people who were invited to banquets.)
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In Gulliver's Travels Jonathan Swift described the two moons of Mars,
Phobos and Deimos, giving their exact size and speeds of rotation.
He did this more than 100 years before either moon was discovered.
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In ancient China doctors were paid when their patients were kept well,
not when they were sick. Believing that it was the doctor's job to
prevent disease, Chinese doctors often paid the patient if the patient
lost his health. Further, if a patient died, a special lantern was
hung outside the doctor's house. At each death another lantern was
added. Too many of these lanterns were certain to ensure a slow trade.
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Every night, wasps bite into the stem of a plant, lock their mandibles
(jaws) into position, stretch out at right angles to the stem, and,
with legs dangling, fall asleep.
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"Breath," by Samuel Beckett, was first performed in April,
1970. The play lasts thirty seconds, has no actors, and no dialogue.
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Celery has negative calories! It takes more calories to eat a piece
of celery than the celery has in it to begin with. In the Balanta
tribe of Africa, a bride remained married until her wedding gown was
worn out. If she wanted a divorce after 2 weeks, all she had to do
was rip up her dress.
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Marie de Medici, a member of that famous Italian family and a 17th-century
queen of France, had expensive tastes in clothes. One special dress
was outfitted with 39,000 tiny pearls and 3,000 diamonds, and cost
the equivalent of twenty million dollars at the time it was made in
1606. She wore it once.
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The eccentric and paranoid American recluse Langley Collier met his
untimely end in 1947. While he was bringing food to his equally odd
brother Homer, who lived as a total hermit, Langley tripped on a wire
to one of his own booby traps and was crushed beneath a suitcase filled
with metal, a sewing machine, three breadboxes, and several bundles
of newspapers. Homer starved to death, and their bodies were undiscovered
for three weeks.
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Ralph Graves entered a doughnut shop with a gun and demanded money
from the cashier. A customer recognized him, however, when Graves
lifted up a corner of his pillowcase mask to find his way out the
door. Graves had forgotten to cut eyeholes.
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A burglar entered the home of Tom Schimmel in Tawas City, Michigan;
collected valuables; fixed himself a bowl of cereal; laid down in
Schimmel's bed and fell asleep. When Schimmel returned to his house
and discovered the crime, he called police. Officers investigated,
completed their reports, and departed. When Schimmel noticed the sleeping
burglar several hours later, he summoned the police again. They awakened
the man and identified him as the thief.
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In 1968, a convention of beggars in Dacca, India, passed a resolution
demanding that "the minimum amount of alms be fixed at 15 paisa
(three cents)." The convention also demanded that the interval
between when a person hears a knock at his front door and when he
offers alms should not exceed 45 seconds.
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A San Antonio wife, filing for divorce, described her husband as "a
bore." "Just what is a bore?" asked the judge. She
thought about it, then quoted, "A person who deprives you of
solitude without providing you with company." The record shows
the judge regarded that as sufficient grounds and granted her the
divorce.
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Lewis ran the 100-yard dash in 17.8 seconds in 1969, thereby setting
a new world's record for runners in the 100-years-or-older class. He
was 101.
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At age ninety, Peter Mustafic of Botovo, Yugoslavia, suddenly began
speaking again after a silence of 40 years. The Yugoslavian news agency
quoted him as saying, "I just didn't want to do military service,
so I stopped speaking in 1920; then I got used to it."
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Cows burp a lot, but until recently no one paid much attention. Now
researchers at the Texas Department of Highways in Fort Worth are
sitting up and taking notice. Each year the cow population of the
United States burps some fifty million tons of valuable hydrocarbons
into the atmosphere. If they could only be captured and efficiently
channeled, say the researchers, the accumulated burps of ten average
cows could keep a small house adequately, if indirectly, heated and
its stove operating for a year.
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The coastal town of Picoaza, Ecuador, was in the midst of a very boring
election campaign when a foot deodorant manufacturer came out with
the slogan "VOTE FOR ANY CANDIDATE, BUT IF YOU WANT WELL-BEING
AND HYGIENE, VOTE FOR PULVAPIES." Then on the eve of the voting,
a leaflet reading: "FOR MAYOR: HONORABLE PULVAPIES" was
widely distributed. In one of the great embarrassments of democracy,
the voters of Picoaza elected the foot powder by a clear majority;
Pulvapies also ran well in outlying districts.
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THE
NOISIEST BURGLAR. A burglar in Paris set new standards for the entire
criminal world, when, on November 4, 1933, he attempted to rob the
home of an antique dealer. At the time he was dressed in a 15th-century
suit of armour which dramatically limited his chances both of success
and escape. He had not been in the house many minutes before its owner
was awakened by the sound of the clanking metal. The owner got up
and went out on to the landing where he saw the suit of armour climbing
the stairs. He straightaway knocked the burglar off balance, dropped
a small sideboard across his breastplate, and went off to call the
police. During police questioning a voice inside the armour confessed
to being a thief trying to pull off a daring robbery. "I thought
I would frighten him," he said. Unfortunately for our man, the
pressure of the sideboard had so dented his breastplate that it was
impossible to remove the armour for 24 hours, during which period
he had to be fed through the visor.
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During Abraham Lincoln's campaign for the presidency, a dyed-in-the-wool
Democrat named Valentine Tapley from Pike County, Missouri, swore
that he would never shave again if Abe were elected. Tapley kept his
word and his chin whiskers went unshorn from November 1860 until he
died in 1910, attaining a length of twelve feet six inches.
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For a while Frederic Chopin, the composer and pianist, wore a beard
on only one side of his face. "It does not matter," he explained.
"My audience sees only my right side."
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