In the on-going war for your hard-earned money, few battles are as one-sided as purchasing a new car. With hundreds and sometimes thousands of dollars at stake, many people make this decision on a whim, and count on the kindness of a car salesman to give them the best deal. These salesmen, with perfect hair, great smiles, warm and friendly demeanor, and tailored suits are all trained to siphon as much money out of your pocket as they possibly can. They are the enemy. They see it as a friendly battle of wits, but it is a battle where only they know the terrain. With a few tips on how to purchase and finance your next new car, and by developing a plan of attack, you can level the battlefield, and perhaps come out victorious.
It is a war-college axiom that you must know your enemy. You must not hate car salesmen, but you must fear them for they are a cunning lot. The most experienced and battle hardened know every trick, and their every move and comment is designed to maintain the upper hand in the conflict. In a book I read on the subject, Remar Sutton's You Don't Have to Get Taken Every Time, a good example of brinkmanship is that of a salesman who would turn his back and walk away from his customer while he was talking. If the customer followed the salesman like a child follows his or her parents in a store, the salesman would know that he was in control. Another feint that most people have seen numerous times is when the salesman goes to confront the evil dealer on your behalf, fighting with him to lower the price. More than likely, he and the dealer were sharing a joke, probably about the gullibility of the average non-salesman. Understanding the enemy's tactics and motivations are paramount in winning this contest.
Before you purchase your new car, you must conduct surveillance behind enemy lines. You should go to various car dealerships and commit yourself to "just looking" at cars. This is not an easy process because once you are on their turf, the enemy does not want you to leave without buying a new automobile. Your senses will be assaulted with tactics such as "Dealer Incentives", "Discount Pricing", and "No Money Down", all in an effort to disorient you. However, for your strategy to work, you must know in advance the exact car you plan to purchase. While you are "just looking", you should also ask each dealership how much you are going to get for your trade-in. Make a point of telling them that you will be asking the same question at each dealership, which will encourage them to offer top-dollar for you old wreck.
Once you have decided on the car you want, and before you head merrily into the fray, you should arm yourself with a weapon. This weapon is a book titled Edmund's Car Buying Guide, which is updated every year. In this book, you will find the dealer price (suggested retail price) and invoice price (wholesale price) for every car made by every manufacturer in that year. Each make and model car will also have listed every extra option offered with the car, and prices for each. Once you know the actual price for the car you want, write it down and destroy the book. This information must be kept top secret, and for your battle plan to work, your opponent can not know that you know what he knows.
There is one more land mine to hurdle before confronting your adversary -- financing. One of the enemy's strongest weapons is the arcane language of financing, which most people need help understanding. The car dealership is always ready to help you with financing, because after all, they are looking out for your best interests, right? Since at this point you know the make and model of the car you want, the smart general will get a pre-approved car loan from his or her bank or credit union before stepping onto the battlefield. This information should also be kept from prying eyes and probing questions, to be sprung on your foe only when the timing is right.
Now that you have all of your weapons at the ready, the next crucial detail is the timing of your attack. Just like decent people, car salesmen look forward to the end of a long day. You should launch your offensive about an hour before closing time. Also, if possible, you should choose a rainy day in the middle of the week near the end of the month. Sales are slower in the middle of the week, especially on rainy days, and end-of-the-month quotas need to be filled. If you really want to drive the car salesman crazy, act flighty and indecisive -- maybe look at a station wagon, then a convertible, then a van -- before slowly making your way to the one you want. You now have the enemy in a vulnerable position: he is tired, frustrated, and ready to surrender so he can go home.
When you have finally infiltrated the enemy headquarters -- the sales office -- be prepared to be assaulted with language about monthly payments. Car salesmen prefer to talk about confusing low monthly payments that hide financing details. They love the look on a customer's face while they easily bang away on a calculator figuring out complex mathematical equations. This is the time to spring your first surprise -- that you will be financed through your own bank or credit union. This will force your opponent to talk in whole dollar amounts, and greatly streamline and simplify the negotiation. He will now know that he is facing a worthy adversary, and the pitch of the battle will be raised.
Now that you are talking about how much this new car really costs, and considering that you know the dealer and invoice prices, you can judge the veracity of your rival. See how close he comes to the actual suggested retail price, remembering that the dealer should make a little profit. Let him go fight with the evil dealer on your behalf, while you pull out the information you found in Edmund's. If he comes back with their "best deal", and it isn't low enough, it is time to assail him with fact. Show him your information and explain to him where you got it. Politely inform him of the price that you think is fair, and let him know that you have a pre-approved car loan. If this last strike is done with a heavy hand, you might find yourself thrown out of the dealership. If done correctly however, the battle will be yours.
A trip to the car dealership should be seen as a battle, a fight for your pocket book. Each side of the conflict has goals that are important to them, and each side uses the best weapons at their disposal. By understanding your enemy, conducting surveillance, and formulating a battle plan, your chances of survival and even victory are greatly enhanced. If you are triumphant, songs will be sung, statues erected, and all car salesmen will fear and respect you from this day forward.
By Matthew King
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