First and Foremost

 

Lieutenant Commander James T. Kirk finally stopped counting the number of times he had paced across the small waiting area outside Admiral Nogura's office. The same could not be said for the admiral's aide, who was finding it increasingly difficult to ignore the painful progress of the young officer limping back and forth in front of his desk. Ensign Gordon had watched as Kirk tried unsuccessfully to wait in a chair provided for visitors. He had also watched Kirk drag himself out of that chair, as if the act of sitting still was too painful to endure. The ensign tried not to stare as Kirk limped up and down the length of the small room. Ensign Gordon had seen more than his share of nervous officers in this waiting room, and had thought he was immune to their distress. But even he felt a twinge of sympathy for this young man.

He knew that Kirk was only a day out of regen, after losing his ship in the battle of Ghioge. He also knew that the lieutenant commander's career was about to be decided in the office beyond his reception area. Kirk had reason to be nervous. His first command had come to a pretty unconventional end. He has lost his ship, but had saved all hands onboard, and had somehow convinced the various warring factions to sit down at the negotiating table. Kirk had done all this while ignoring injuries severe enough to put him through a month's regen.

The Starfleet pundits were evenly divided about the lieutenant commander's fate. Kirk was already something of a legend. Rumors that he had hacked into a command program at the Academy had started the stories about him. Kirk had served with distinction aboard the Republic and the Farragut. He had received the Palm Leaf of Axanar for acts of bravery, and had at the same time managed to make some bitter enemies in Starfleet. Junior officers did not usually attract this much attention. Young Kirk was either very special, or very scary, depending upon who was doing the talking.

He had certainly set the Starfleet gossip mills in motion this time. Some thought that he would be drummed out of the fleet for losing his first ship, no matter what the outcome. Others insisted that he would be promoted to commander, and would probably even be given a berth on a starship for having gotten the combatants at Ghioge to agree to a cease-fire. Ensign Gordon reflected that none of them would have long to wait to find out which faction was right about the young officer. If Kirk survived the wait, Admiral Nogura, Commander-in-Chief of Starfleet would soon settle all bets.

The serene voice of the Admiral requesting Kirk's presence in his office startled both of the men in the waiting room. Giving Nogura's aide a wary smile, Kirk limped over to the door. He stopped with a foot to spare. Gordon was treated to the sight of a nervous, wounded, young man transforming himself into the picture of calm command. When he thought back on it, Gordon was never sure exactly what had happened. Kirk took a few deep breaths, rotated his head and shoulders and seemed to grow taller and broader, and to sparkle with a kind of energy that was almost visible. He strode forward. The door opened and Kirk entered Nogura's office.

******

"Come in, Kirk. Come in."

Jim Kirk had heard much about the commander in chief. Some of it from fellow officers. Some of it from his father who had briefly served with the admiral many years before, and had apparently never gotten over the experience. All of it tinged with awe at the fierce ability and the almost supernatural calm that Nogura maintained even in the gravest moments of crisis. Kirk had never before seen the admiral in person, and the site of a small, gray haired, grandfatherly man smiling at him was the last thing he expected. He moved closer to the admiral's desk and stood at attention.

"At ease, Kirk. Sit down before you fall down," Nogura gestured to a chair across his desk.

"How are you feeling, my boy? Any after effects from the treatments? I had regen once, and for about a week I kept bumping into walls. I just couldn't seem to get the hang of judging distances. Went away though."

Kirk tried not to look surprised at the turn the conversation was taking. He was certain that Admiral Nogura had called him into his office to strip him of his rank. Or worse, Nogura might throw him out of the service altogether.

"I'm fine, sir. The doctors say I made a complete recovery."

Nogura chuckled.

"Doctors. I'm considering ordering the entire medical staff to spend a week in regen so they'll stop making idiotic statements like that to their patients. You're not fine yet. Don't expect it. But, you will be. Don't worry."

The admiral moved from behind his desk and walked over to the windows that were the most commanding feature of the room. The view was magnificent. Kirk could see Starfleet Academy and beyond it, San Francisco Bay. There were dozens of sailboats skimming across the light chop, and for a moment Kirk wished that he was aboard one. He wished he was anywhere but here, in this room. He was aware of the scuttlebutt. He knew that opinions were evenly divided between promotion and disgrace. His own opinion was absolute. Kirk knew with complete certainty that he had failed. He should have been able to find a way to save his ship. He was glad that the battle had ended. He was relieved beyond measure that no one on his ship had died. And, he was completely certain that he had failed. He had a feeling that a sailboat might be all he would ever command when he left this room.

As if he could read Kirk's mind Nogura asked, "Ever been sailing on the bay?"

"No sir," replied the startled Kirk. " I've sailed, but never on San Francisco Bay. It looks beautiful."

"Don't let her deceive you, son." Nogura snapped. "She's as treacherous a body of water as you'll find anywhere. On the surface, she can look calm and clear. But, underneath there are a thousand currents and eddies that can trip you up without a moment's warning."

The admiral was silent. He seemed lost in thought. What had he been trying to say? Kirk wondered if this was the moment when his career ended. When all the years of knowing with complete certainty that the stars were his destiny would come to nothing.

"You're George Kirk's son."

Kirk started. He was having difficulty following the twists in the Admiral's conversations. He felt a bit like Alice down the rabbit hole. Was Nogura toying with him before delivering the blow? Kirk wished he would just get to the point.

Nogura chuckled again. He seemed to have recovered his mood.

"Did you know that George and I served together 30 years ago on the Abraham Lincoln? He was pretty green, but very impressive none the less. Security was the perfect match for George. He was one of the toughest, smartest, most aggressive men I've ever served with. Almost as tough and smart as your mother. How is Winona? It's been too long since I've seen her."

Jim Kirk hadn't known that Admiral Nogura even knew his mother. The conversation was getting curiouser and curiouser.

"She's well, sir. My mother's doing some bio-ag research. Working on a hybrid triticale. She took on the project just after we heard about my father. The work seems to help." Kirk paused as he thought of his father, missing, presumed dead. He wondered if they'd ever really find out what happened to the Respite.

"Shame about George. Well, when you see her again, tell her Chiro sends his love."

Jim Kirk wondered briefly if he needed to return to the hospital to have his medication adjusted.

"Ever been on the Enterprise?" Nogura shifted gears yet again.

Kirk looked at the admiral. Why would he ask that question? If he knew his father's career, Nogura had to know that George Kirk served under Captain April on the Enterprise. He might have guessed that a proud father would have shown his boys Starfleet's finest, the first constitution class starship. Was the admiral playing some kind of perverse game with him? If so, Kirk hoped that he would stop soon and put him out of his misery.

"Yes, sir." Kirk responded. "When I was a boy, Captain April let my dad show my brother and me around the ship. She's beautiful."

"She's more than beautiful, Kirk. First and foremost, she's the best-engineered piece of equipment in the history of mankind. She's going to take us to places we've only dreamed of. She'll help us to learn more than we have ever learned before."

Jim Kirk felt a chill run down his spine. The rumors of a five-year deep space mission for the Enterprise had been swirling around Starfleet for months. Christopher Pike was going to be the luckiest captain in Starfleet. There had been a time, before Ghioge, when Kirk had dreamed of being aboard the Enterprise for that mission. But not anymore. The sadness that he felt made it impossible for him to speak.

"She's going to need a very special kind of captain, my boy," Admiral Nogura continued. "Chris Pike and I agree that he's not the one to do it. He's a fine man and a brilliant captain, but he doesn't have the passion to explore. Not anymore. If he thinks he's not the man for this mission, then he's not. He's coming back to Starfleet Command."

Kirk tried not to show his surprise. He attempted to imagine what circumstances could persuade someone to give up command of a starship for the bureaucracy of Starfleet. He failed. He turned his concentration back to the admiral, who was now speaking with a kind of reverence in his voice that Kirk had not heard before.

"This mission will be different from anything ever undertaken by a starship. It will take the Enterprise beyond the boundaries of known space, far from the rules and regulations that we all trained under. The Enterprise needs someone who can handle the unexpected. Someone who is not afraid to try something new, when the old doesn't work. Someone who can make the tough decisions out there, no matter the cost. Someone who doesn't need Command to tell him what's right and what's wrong. She needs someone who will not try to second-guess himself. And, most importantly, the Enterprise needs a captain with the passion, the drive, and the will to go where no man has gone before and to bring her and her crew home safely."

Nogura walked back from his windows and reached for a tissue paper package that had been sitting on top of the desk. It was wrapped in the Japanese style, folded paper forming the most intricate pattern. Silently, the admiral handed it to the puzzled young man across from him.

"You lost your ship, Kirk. But, you made all the right choices. Sometimes you win by losing. Command's a lot like that bay out there. Calm on the surface, but beneath the calm lurks danger that can run you aground. Sometimes, like at Ghioge, you can't avoid all the reefs. You have to know which ones will kill you and which ones will let you pass. Open the package, my boy."

Kirk carefully pulled back the layers of delicate paper. A gold command tunic lay nestled in the wrapping.

"It's yours, if you want it." Nogura smiled at him. "Open up the shirt."

With trembling fingers Kirk lifted out the tunic. On its chest was the unmistakable golden swoop of the Enterprise's insignia. Kirk closed his eyes for a moment, afraid that if he opened them, the tunic might vanish. He pulled at the shirt and it came unfolded. On the sleeves were three gold braids. For a moment the shirt and the room seemed to pull away from him as the reality of what he held refused to register.

"You're not going to faint on me, are you, Kirk? Wouldn't do to have the new captain of the Enterprise fainting as his first official act." The admiral seemed to twinkle. He was clearly delighted with Kirk's stunned reaction. "Well, we certainly fooled the rumor mills around here. I stand to collect a sizeable bet if you accept this commission. You do want it, don't you?"

Jim Kirk was completely stunned. He looked down at the tunic then up at the smiling admiral. He nodded. He simply could not speak.

"I'll take that as a yes. The Enterprise leaves Spacedock in 6 weeks. You have three weeks to get well. You will then report to your ship to assume command of the Enterprise and the first five-year mission in the history of Starfleet. Let's have a party when you take command. And Kirk...."

Kirk nodded.

"Invite your mother."

Kirk nodded again.

The admiral chuckled.

"I certainly hope that you can talk by the time you leave Spacedock. Now put on that tunic and let's give the gossips something to wag their tongues about."

Kirk shrugged out of his shirt and pulled the new captain's tunic over his head. He couldn't stop himself from fingering the gold braid. He looked up to see the admiral watching him with an amused look on his face.

"Make me proud, son. Make your family proud. And, most important, do what you think is right. No matter what others may say. Follow your instincts. They've been good so far. Hard to argue with the youngest captain in Starfleet history. Oh, and Kirk...."

Jim Kirk nodded again.

"Dismissed."

Jim Kirk pushed himself out of his chair and stood at attention. He struggled to think of the words to say. He was simply overwhelmed. Nothing came to him. Except the obvious.

"Thank you, Admiral."

His voice sounded strange to his own ears, as if it was coming through a tunnel. Wobbling just a bit, Kirk turned to leave the room.

"Captain Kirk."

Jim Kirk's breath left his body. It was the first time he'd ever heard anyone use that name. He'd dreamed of it since he was a boy. Sometimes, late at night, when he couldn't sleep, he'd lie in bed saying the name softly to himself. He'd always wanted this. He knew that he had come very close to losing his dream. And, now he had it back. Everything that he had ever imagined, ever dreamed of, worked for. He was torn between wanting this moment to last forever, and wanting to get on with what lay ahead.

"Yes, Admiral?"

"Just wanted to try it out. It has a nice ring, don't you think?"

"Oh, yes sir. I do indeed."

The two men exchanged a final smile, each one wondering what lay ahead, and each one certain that whatever it was, it would be a grand adventure.

The End

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