(Mineral collectors sometimes say one thing and mean another.)
(Mineral collectors sometimes say one thing and mean another.)
| When they say... | ...they really mean... |
| "Don't bother searching that area, I've already checked it out." | "If you find something good where I've already looked, I'll never speak to you again." |
| "Hey, you found a really nice specimen!" | "You'd better compliment me on what I find." |
| "This looks like a good place to stop and collect." | "If we climb another step up this God-forsaken mountain, you're carrying me." |
| "I kept this specimen because it's unsusal for the locality." | "There's something wrong with it." |
| "I'm not finding much right here." | "Dig one inch closer, and I will chisel your foot off." |
| "Did you bring any toliet paper for wrapping delicate specimens?" | "I shouldn't have had that extra cup of coffee this morning." |
| "I suppose I could drive." | "You drive." |
| "My wife doesn't mind me storing my specimens in the basement." | "She gave up going down there long ago." |
| "My kids know I need to spend time with my adult friends." | "I'm riddled with guilt." |
| "Well, we had nice weather." | "I didn't find squat." |
| "'Looks like you found a pocket." | "Step aside." |
| "Hmm, looks like a rare-earth mineral." | "I have no idea what that is." |
| "It's nice to run into other collectors in the field." | "Show them our worst finds, so they'll look somewhere else." |
| "We saw some great wildlife." | "I didn't find squat." |
| "Maybe this specimen will look better after a little trimming." | "I'd throw this junker away, but it's the best one I have." |
| "I brought alot of specimens home to give away to kids." | "I didn't find squat." |
| "I guess I'll pass up buying this Sweet Home rhodochrosite." | "Looks like I'll be able to afford college for my kids." |
| "I've had enough of collecting for a while." | "I'm going out again next weekend." |
© 2002 Paul Gilmore
Used with permission of author (just ask)
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