OUR TRIP TO MEXICO
or
PARADISE IS A HOT PLACE
or
EIGHT DAYS OF RAYS IN MAY
or
DON'T EAT THE ICE, EITHER
or
TOUCH THESE PLEASE, I AM FINITE

Laura and I went to Mexico from May 12th, 2003 to May 19th. She had just
graduated from CU with her Ph.D. in English Literature, an
accomplishment 12 years in the making. The graduation ceremony was on
Friday the 9th, and we left shortly afterwards, almost like a honeymoon.

This trip was planned for a very long time. We got the germ of the idea
when she was close to finishing a chapter and we were pondering how to
celebrate. There used to be a travel agency right next door to my
office, so we spoke to someone there and she suggested Mexico as a great
"relaxation destination" for its beaches of sugar sand and turquoise
water. Finally we decided we'd do it when she finished, and in Laura's
mind she wasn't OFFICIALLY finished until after graduation. We worked
with a local travel agent (from a different agency, the original one
having disappeared in the interim) and booked the trip through Apple
Vacations, who set us up at the Bahia Principe Tulum in the Riviera
Maya, which is sort of the mainland companion to Cozumel. The resort was
"all-inclusive", meaning that we paid an initial fee upfront that
covered the plane, the lodgings, and all the food and drinks.
Consequently, we almost never left the resort. 

FREE-FLOATING NOTABLE MOMENTS
-----------------------------
There was a basket of fruit in the room, which neither of us really
cared to eat. We wanted to ask housekeeping to take it, but due to my
poor Spanish we very nearly left a note reading "Touch these please, I
am finite."

On that same note, Laura spent the first several days saying to
everyone, "Lo siento, no habla espaņol." When I heard her, I had to let
her know that she wanted "no hablo espaņol," meaning, "I don't speak
Spanish." She had been telling everyone, "I'm sorry, you don't speak
Spanish."

Iguanas many places, especially on a sunny sidewalk just outside the
lobby. There were many small ones (small meaning about the length of my
forearm), plus a large one (forearm plus hand). I may be being
conservative in those measurements. Laura named the large one "Douglas",
after Douglas Adams and his encounters with Komodo dragons. She was
concerned at first that one of the iguanas might mistake her toe for a
chicken nugget.

Shopping for postcards in the gift shop, we came across a line of
postcards called "Mayan Angels." These had little paintings of brown-
skinned angels accompanied by one or another little piece of
philosophical insight in Spanish on the left side of the card, with an
English translation on the right. Many of these sayings were very good
indeed, but they were sometimes marred by less-than-perfect
translations. The best example of this, one that starts off strong only
to flail at the end: "When you feel that your fears are taking over,
purify them with the waters of thruth..." "You want the thruth?" I was
prompted to ask. "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE THRUTH!"

Lots and lots of reading. I probably read about 1000 pages in the course
of the trip. Of course, I chose rather large books (LIVE FROM NEW YORK,
an SNL prose-documentary, all in interview form; and Neal Stephenson's
CRYPTONOMICON) so in book terms I only read about one-and-a-half. Laura,
on the other hand, tore through two separate Tamora Pierce series. This
may also be partly influenced by the fact that I can only read for so
long before I simply *must* do something else.

The weather every day was uniformly hot, humid, and breezy. Happily,
this is a pretty good combination, since the breezes relieve much of the
discomfort that might otherwise be caused by the heat and the humidity.
I suppose the downside to this is that the level of the winds caused the
sea to be fairly rough each day. The hotel has a red-yellow-green flag
system to warn people of how safe the swimming conditions are, and all
the flags stayed exactly the same color our whole stay: red, except for
a couple of yellow ones where a row of mossy rocks in the water
protected the shore.

It took us a few days to figure out where we wanted to hang out. At
first, we tried setting up right in front of our place, in some deck
chairs by the ocean. The problem with this is that when Laura would get
overheated (and because I favored the shade pretty much exclusively, she
was the only one who did) she'd want to dip in the water, but dipping in
the ocean leaves one feeling a bit too salty afterwards, so she didn't
want to do it repeatedly throughout the day. Besides that, the waves
were often rough, as I mentioned above. So we tried hanging out by the
main pool next. The problems here were several. First of all, it's
crowded. Second, the service at the pool bar was noticeably worse than
anywhere else in the resort, probably because that bar had the highest
ratio of annoying drunk patrons, so the staff tried to be as absent
(mentally and physically) as possible. There was a swim-up bar at one
side of the pool, which I just had to use once because of its hilarious
nature, but the service there was more or less an extension of that at
the main pool bar, which may also serve to explain the frequent paucity
of staff. Finally, there's the fact that the main pool is LOUD -- lots
of raucous music during all daylight hours, along with activities led by
a guy shouting Spanish and English into a microphone. These activities
were on the order of water aerobics, shoulder-wrestling, etc. The nadir
was some kooky little skit whose main moral seemed to be "women, if you
cheat on your boyfriend he will kill you." I just remember lots of the
guy shouting into the mic "SHOOT HER! PUTA ELLA!" and "Todos las mujeres
son mismos! All the women are the same!" Since I'd been reading an SNL
book the first few days we were there, the whole pool-skit thing felt
like a comedy sketch to me, with us cast as the straight couple,
increasingly alarmed by the outrageous direction of the narrator's
remarks. So finally we ended up at what they called "the quiet pool". Of
course, "quiet" is a relative term -- there was still music and a
microphone guy, but the microphone guy only spoke a couple of times a
day, and the music was relatively innocuous 80s dance medlies or Enrique
Iglesias CDs rather than blaring salsa and party music interrupted by
the occasional "We Are The Champions" or "Na Na Hey Hey Goodbye" to mark
the winners and losers of the various competitions. 


DAY-BY-DAY
==========

5-12-03 (Monday)
----------------
Flying out at 8:00am, which meant arriving at the airport at 6:00am,
which meant leaving here at 5:15am, which meant getting out of bed at
4:45am. OUCH! We arrived in Cancun about 12:30 local time (which is all
Central time) and were taken from the airport by an Apple vacations
transport to our hotel. Literally as we were standing in line to be
checked in, a hotel staff person walked up and handed me a drink, which
Laura found very funny.

We settled into the room, which was quite nice indeed. Aside from the
stocked minibar, there was a huge bed, large bathroom, nice couch, table
and chairs, and best of all an *amazing* view of the ocean out the back
balcony. At 4:00 we attended an orientation thingy held by Apple, but
this was a bit of a disappointment -- lots of pumping up the various
tours and activities but not all that much about the place itself. So we
were left to learn some stuff on our own, and did so by walking around
the place that night, referring to our map like we were at a theme park.
Actually, several things about the place had a sort of theme-parky feel,
especially the ersatz "entertainment" at the main pool and auditorium,
as well as the various activity concentration areas and the map that
lays the whole thing out.

That night, we took a walk along the beach under a bright, nearly-full
moon.

5-13-03 (Tuesday)
-----------------
After spending the morning sleeping and talking, we went to lunch and
then walked up to the Hacienda Dona Isabel, which was more or less a
shopping center of little carts and souvenir stores, along with a couple
of bars and an Internet cafe. Laura bought several souvenirs, including
a beach bag (a small, bright woven one), two green necklaces, and a grey
ceramic dolphin. After returning from this, we hung out on the beach and
played in the ocean for a while.

Dinner that night at the Tequila a la carte restaurant, which was
probably the best dinner we had while we were there. This restaurant's
theme is the various cuisines of Mexico, and there was a fantastic
buffet of Mexican appetizers, followed by excellent soup and very good
entrees. Actually, I think Laura didn't much care for her entree (we
both had various preparations of beef) because of some sauce that was
atop it, but she liked the rest enough to make up for it. 

5-14-03 (Wednesday)
-------------------
In the morning I took a short walk over to the Hacienda to check my
email at the Internet cafe while Laura slept. (She did quite a bit of
sleeping in the early part of the vacation, then started waking up
earlier as the week went on.) I was surprised to find her still sleeping
when I returned!

After lunch, we read a bit then waited in the lobby to rendezvous with
our ride to Puerto Aventuras for our dolphin experience, which was put
together by a Mexican company called Dolphin Discovery. Similar to our
ride from the airport, this drive was rather harrowing for me. The
Mexicans seem to have worked out a fairly viable system for driving on a
two-lane road at very high speeds, which is that each lane has a
generous shoulder area, and whenever someone wants to pass, the car
they're passing obligingly moves to the right so that the passer can get
by, while cars in the other lane look out for these sorts of occurrences
and move into the shoulder themselves. That is, unless one of them is
trying to pass at the same time on their side. It all seems to work
fairly well, but it does involve a fair amount of drifting into the path
of oncoming traffic, so I found it a bit nerve-wracking. For whatever
reason, Laura was much more zen about the Mexican car-crash thing.

When we arrived at Puerto Aventuras (which is not so much a town,
apparently, as a sort of designated water-sports area), we stumbled
around until we found our check-in spot, then waited for our group to be
called. The park was set up with a little island in the center,
surrounded by a ring of water, which itself was surrounded by a ring of
pavement and stores, as well as some outlying pools and a boating area.
The island is the center for the dolphin-swimmers, and it has lockers
and equipment as well as video screening rooms for training vids and the
just-in-time post-swimming videos created by Dolphin Discovery. While we
waited, we watched some nearby pools, one of which housed two large
manatees, which Laura photographed surfacing for air (though it may be
that those photos look like nothing but a black dot in the water.)
Another pool held a half-dozen or so rays, most of which were a mottled
gray, except one pitch-black specimen who looked like the Darth Vader of
the ray world. We also wandered over to watch some of the dolphins being
fed, and saw a baby dolphin (a cub? a calf? Yes, calf. Thank you,
Google!). 

Finally our turn came. A guide named Luisa gathered us together and
explained the whole thing twice, once in English and once in Spanish.
Before we went to the dolphin island, we participated in a training
exercise for some parrots that they were working on acclimating to
people, sounds, photos, etc. Basically, everybody who wanted to just
came up and was handed a bird or two, then posed for a photo. No doubt
this was also a handy way to increase photo revenue as well. :)

Then we went to the island and viewed a video that explained how the
whole thing would work, explained the do's and don'ts, and sort of got
us psyched up for being in the water with the dolphins. A major part of
the dolphin program's purpose is education, so we were given a lot of
info about how dolphins live in the open ocean, their biology, and so
on. After the video, we changed out of our street clothes and put on
life jackets. Our large group was split into smaller subgroups. We were
in Group A: us plus two other het couples, both of whom happened to be
from the Netherlands (though they all spoke excellent English.) We were
led out onto a dock by one of the dolphin trainers, whose name was Juan.
Laura and I both liked this guy right away, and felt even better about
him after the whole thing was over. It was clear that he was somebody
who really cared about the animals themselves first and foremost. He
definitely put the dolphins ahead of the tourists, and we both strongly
approved. He explained that we would be in the water with two dolphins,
both female, named Maggie and Odisea. Maggie was about twice Odisea's
age (16 as opposed to 8), and it was clear that she was much more
comfortable with people than Odisea was. Juan also told us that Maggie
was 2 months pregnant. Dolphins have a year-long gestation period, so
she was still a good 10 months away from giving birth. 

At Juan's prompting, we got into the water, which was a little bit cold
and quite a bit briny. (As one of the Dutch guys put it, "Salty-fresh!")
The first thing they did was have the dolphins swim by us and wave their
fins as a cute little "hello" gesture. Then, because I had gotten into
the water first, I was the first to swim out for an interactive part of
the program, the "foot push." Basically, you float face down in the water
while the dolphins swim up behind you. Then one dolphin gets behind each
foot, and with their noses they begin pushing you. Because they're so
fast in the water, you build up a terrific speed very quickly, until
you're skimming over the water so fast it feels like flying. This was
really an incredible thing, but rather scary at the end, as it felt like
I was going to fly straight into the dock! Of course I didn't -- the
dolphins know when to stop, and even if they didn't I'm sure I cued them
with my body enough to tell them to stop anyway. Meanwhile, as I swam
out for the foot push, Laura was first in line for what they called the
"dolphin kiss." Basically, this means that a dolphin swims up to you,
brings its nose out of the water, and you lift it up to give it a kiss
on the nose, then turn to the camera and hold your cheek to the
dolphin's nose so it looks like she is returning your affection.
Obviously she isn't, but there is still a sort of intimate feeling to
having such a magnificent and gentle animal close enough to kiss. 

After this came something called the "dorsal tow" -- basically, you hang
out in the water with your body in a "T" position, your arms out and
your thumbs facing downward. Then, like the foot push, the dolphins swim
up behind you, but this time one comes up on either side of you, their
dorsal fins running into your hands. You grab the fins and hang on while
they tow you through the water. Our order in the water for all the
activities was preserved throughout the whole thing, so I was first for
this as well, and Laura was last. Meanwhile, while other people were
setting up for their dorsal tows, Laura and I swam out together with a
big pole. We each held one end of the pole, and Odisea swam up
underneath us and leaped high over the pole, twice. The one other thing
that happened during this section of the program is that Juan had the
dolphins swim by a couple of times and vocalize with their heads out of
the water, so that we could hear what their voices sound like.

The last part of the program was the best, though. The other parts were
a bit like the dolphins doing tricks for our benefit, and while it felt
fine and it was amazing to do such interactive activities, it also
seemed a little too structured to allow any sort of real connection
between you and the animal. At the end, though, the six of us swam out
into the center of the pool in a widely spaced circle and just had "free
play" with the dolphins. They could swim wherever they wanted, and we
were free to touch and interact with them. It was only at this point
where I could really start to see the clear personality differences
between Maggie and Odisea, and their physical differences as well.
The back of Maggie's dorsal fin has sort of a ragged pattern, while
Odisea's fin is more of a smooth curve in the back. Also, their skins
are marked with small scrapes and scars. We asked Juan about these
marks afterwards, and he explained that most of them don't come out of
conflict with dolphins or other animals, but rather out of playful
and/or sexual behavior with other dolphins. The free play time was just
lovely, and the dolphins seemed particularly drawn to Laura, especially
Maggie.

All too soon, the swim was over, and we climbed out of the water. Laura
and I talked with Juan for a while after everyone else had gone back to
the lockers, and he answered all our questions with a lot of knowledge
and enthusiasm. Finally, we changed into our street clothes again and
watched the video of our time with the dolphins. These videos are filmed
while you're out in the water and put together by Dolphin Discovery so
that they're ready almost immediately after you're finished. Of course,
we bought one, along with some photos of us in the water with the
dolphins, and one of us with the parrots. 

After we got back to the hotel, we were both tired but happy. I'm not
terribly inclined to romanticize our time with the dolphins -- I don't
think we made some sort of special spiritual connection with them or
anything, and I recognize that they see tons of tourists every day, but
for ourselves, it was just really cool to have the experience of sharing
the water with them for a while, and being able to touch and be touched
by them. We had dinner shortly after getting back, then spent the
evening in a couple of beach chairs by the ocean, just talking. 

5-15-03 (Thursday)
------------------
From this point forward, the daily experiences start to get a little
more repetetive. There was a lot of reading each day, great meals at the
buffet, and an endless succession of Diet Cokes (for her) and various
alcoholic beverages (for me.) However, there were a few special things
each day, and one of Thursday's was Laura's braids. The resort had a
little station set up by the pool where you could get a massage or get
your hair braided. Laura had her eye on this from the beginning, and
spent some time figuring out whether she wanted to do it, and how many
she would get if she did it. She toyed with the idea of braiding *all*
her hair, but in the end decided to just have two parallel braids, both
on the left side of her head, with a few beads at the end of each. They
ended up looking very cool, especially when her hair is wet. 

The other big event on this day was at night: the lunar eclipse. It's
not as if Laura and I knew about this in advance. We had walked along
the beach after night fell, enjoying the luminous full moon shining over
the water, and wanted to spend some more time in the moonlight. So we
went up to our room and sat on the balcony. Patches of clouds were
blowing across the sky, obscuring the light for awhile only to make it
seem more brilliant when it re-emerged. Just as we were about to pack it
in, Laura noticed that the moon seemed to be obscured by a particularly
dark cloud. The more we watched, the more convinced we were that it was
not a cloud but instead an actual lunar eclipse. We stayed outside
watching as the crescent became thinner and thinner, until just a sliver
of the disc remained. I tried to get some pictures, but predictably they
look mostly like an increasingly small white spot on a dark background,
without any of the sort of detail we could see with our eyes. Finally,
the eclipse reached the "diamond ring" stage, with just a hint of
luminescence peeking out from behind a dark orb with a glowing circlet
around it, and then the light went out entirely. As we watched the light
return, we talked more about our lives, stories from school days and
later. 

5-16-03 (Friday)
----------------
This day was our 10-year relationship anniversary. That is to say, May
16 of 1993 was the first time we kissed, and we'd been together since
then. We spent the day lounging and being together, and went out that
night to the Dolce Vita a la carte restaurant, which as you might guess
from the name had an Italian theme. I had something called an "Ocean
Eclipse", which seemed rather appropriate given our last night's
moongazing. The dish was black pasta atop white pasta, with shrimp.
Laura had meat lasagna, her favorite. 

5-17-03 (Saturday)
------------------
We spent most of this day reading on the beach, but we did take a little
time to go sea kayaking a little ways out from the beach. Sea kayaking
means life-jackets, paddles, and extremely buoyant boats out in
middling-to-large waves. The trick is to keep your boat as perpendicular
to the wave as possible, but this didn't always work well for us, and
consequently we both got flipped at around the same time. Laura, being
the more kayak-experienced of the two of us, managed to right herself
fairly quickly, while I floundered around trying to figure out how to
jump onto and flip over the boat while still holding onto the paddle. I
never did figure it out -- a lifeguard guy rowed over and helped me flip
the boat and get back into it. My arms tired quickly, no doubt an
occupational hazard for arms whose most strenuous regular exercise is a
long bout of typing. 

That morning, I had gone over to the Hacienda while Laura hung out on
the beach. I did my souvenir shopping and checked my email at the
Internet cafe, which was fun. I found myself drawn to a silver ring with
vertical cuts around its perimeter, but the shop only had two, one of
which was too small for any of my fingers and the other one of which was
too large for anything but my right thumb. (My body is a bit
asymmetrical, and my right hand and foot are larger than my left.) So I
bought the big one and it's on my right thumb now. Souvenirs themselves
were, I thought, pretty remarkably cheap. Maybe it's just because I was
in a "vacation spending" state of mind, but I felt like lots of pretty
nice stuff was fairly affordable. The exchange rate was running about
ten pesos to a dollar, which made calculating actual costs quite easy
indeed.

5-18-03 (Sunday)
----------------
Henna tattoos. I got the Stevie "S dragon" on the back of my right hand,
and Laura got two different ones: on her left leg, some abstract spirals
that to her looked like ocean waves, and on her left arm, a Japanese
ideogram signifying "brave." They all looked really cool, and even
though they'll fade in a week or two, we'll enjoy them while they last. 

5-19-03 (Monday)
----------------
The trip back. Even though our flight was at 1:30p, we had to leave
quite early (at about 9:30a) because our bus stopped by a bunch of other
hotels to pick up more returnees. Sadly, we found out at the airport
that our flight was delayed by an hour. 

5-20-03 (Tuesday)
-----------------
Aftershocks. I think we inadvertently contracted the dreaded Mexican
water bacteria problem on our last few hours in Mexico, from ice in a
drink at an airport restaurant. We were so accustomed to not being wary
of water and ice, since everything at the resort was purified and we
almost never left the resort, so we were caught flatfooted by this. We
didn't even think about it until the consequences began Monday night and
Tuesday, and in trying to puzzle out where we went wrong, we hit upon
the freakin' airport drink. Damn it!


--------------------------
For the two of us, this trip was really rather like the honeymoon we
never had. The beach and tropical environment made it feel like a real
vacation, and we spent virtually the entire time together and really
enjoyed it.