On Blogging

My minor crisis of conscience last week has led me to think more about blogging, and especially, why I do this. To cut directly to the chase, I have decided that I will continue to write here. However, I am thinking somewhat differently about what I do here and why I do it. This article will share some of what I am thinking.

Motivation

In my very first post on this site, I wrote the following:

I won't pretend at this point that I have anything profound to share with the world. Again, the audience will be the judge. I hope that people reading this will find it interesting, informative, challenging and maybe even insightful. Attempting to write something on a somewhat regular schedule that has those qualities will certainly be challenging for me. I'm not a professional writer.

In other words, my motivations for writing in this blog were to 1) write something that others might find at least somewhat interesting, and 2) to challenge myself to become a better writer.

Underlying all of this was a desire to be a Christian witness to a lost world. It's the primary reason I asked other Christian bloggers about forming some sort of alliance of Christian bloggers, which was one of the things that led to the formation of "The Blogdom of God" by Dr. Adrian Warnock.

In my professional life, I don't overtly or blatantly evangelize or advertise that I am a Christian; although I don't make a secret of it at all. I work in a secular environment, with people from all sorts of backgrounds and faiths, and open displays of religion would be rather frowned upon. I am also not an extrovert, so I'm not the type of person that can easily share my faith. My relationship with God is deeply personal; I have on several occasions experienced God's hand on my life in ways that I can only describe as miraculous. Because my faith is so personal, I don't at all care for others denigrating it. So, I am reticent to talk openly about it to non-believers. If someone that I think is truly, openly seeking God asks, I am more than willing to share, or if I am talking with another trusted believer I will be open. Other than that, in my professional life, I try to be a witness by my actions much more than by my words.

So, I originally looked at this blog as a means to be more outspoken in my witness for Christ. Although I don't write on Christian topics that often, I wanted to be sure that people reading this blog understood that my writing was directed by my Christian beliefs and faith. I hoped that some people, even if only one or two, would be encouraged in their own faith, and maybe even that my writing might plant a seed that would germinate into mature Christian faith in someone else. I realized it wasn't much, but I sincerely wanted to be a better witness for my Lord.

Confession

When I started writing, roughly ten months ago, I had noble goals, but I must confess that I have lost sight of them.

I have become too concerned about my standings in the "Ecosystem." I have done some things, such as commenting more often than usual in other blogs, that were as much about trying to get more visitors to my blog as they were about contributing positively to a discussion. When I looked at some other blogs, I have often thought that my writing or my blog design were far better. I've been secretly looking down on all of the people (almost everyone) that uses blogging software, like Movable Type, and I've been rather pleased with myself for doing my blog by hacking my own HTML, sneering, even if just a little, at those without the technical skills to do so. I have even thought, now and then, that I could write professionally, like perhaps James Lileks or Michelle Malkin.

 (Ha! As if. They're in a completely different league; people like Lileks or Malkin are Major League writers. I'm, at best, on a single-A farm club in West Podunksville.)

In short, I have been guilty of that most deadly of sins - pride.

As sin does in every situation, the pride that I had allowed to creep into my blogging has poisoned what I originally intended to be something good and turned it into a problem. When I found myself being accused of being a "self-righteous member of the right wing thought police" I realized that my blogging was no longer encouraging others to walk with Christ. I'm not certain it actually ever had been, for that matter.

Action

So, I very nearly decided to abandon this all together. I would much rather be silent than for my words to be a stumbling block for others.

As I thought about it more, though, I came to the conclusion that my original motivations were still valid. I do still want to be a better witness for Christ. I also still want to improve as a writer, and I would like to have a place where I can write about things that interest me. Hopefully, someone else will find those things somewhat interesting, too.

On the other hand, I need to make some changes in how I approach this.

I will not be writing nearly as often about politics, Iraq, or terrorism, even though they have been the topics I've written about most often. At this point in time, those issues are too divisive, and I don't want to be a divider. I still have firmly-held views on them, but for the time being I won't be writing about them so much. Perhaps after the presidential elections in November, it will be appropriate for me to discuss those things more.

In addition, I am going to refrain from commenting in other blogs, especially on those topics. Again, I would rather be silent than for my words to be a stumbling block for others. As I looked at my motives when I left comments in other blogs, as often as not (especially recently) my motivations were less than ideal, and that has been reflected in how others have reacted. If there has been any theme running through my writing, it has been "You reap what you sow." That has been made painfully obvious to me - once again! - so rather than sowing discord, I will attempt to sow peace by staying out of divisive and emotional debates.

The topics I write about will become more personal, and I may write more about technical topics - computer stuff, after all, is really what I know best (not that I know that much - everything keeps changing on me!). I hope that the few people that visit this site somewhat regularly will understand why I am making these changes. My writing tends to be all over the board, anyway, so other than me, probably no one will notice any difference.

Conclusion

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,

"Whoever would love life
    and see good days
must keep his tongue from evil
    and his lips from deceitful speech.
He must turn from evil and do good;
    he must seek peace and pursue it.
For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
    and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."

Those verses are from 1 Peter 3:8-12 [NIV], and they describe perfectly how I need to conduct myself with regards to this blog, and indeed, in my whole life. I don't intend that my blog is all sugary, namby-pamby fluff, but I do intend that it be a reflection of my walk with Christ, which is deeply personal, life-changing, and challenging, but always positive and constructive. So, I hope those of you reading this blog will find it to be a good and pleasant experience, a refuge from the overheated, negative, even nasty and destructive rhetoric you read so many other places.

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