"--what is knowledge but
grieving?"
Author: Rorie
Email: rorie.brianne(at)nospamcomcast.net
© March 17, 2004
Classification: Webb/Mac,
Harm/Mac, RVA
Rating: G (not a bad word in sight!)
Spoilers: Anything that has aired in
seasons 2-9 is fair game.
Summary: Webb's thoughts on
his relationship with Mac. Two-and-a-half
drabbles. J
(My sister calls it a flash-fic.)
Author's Notes: Contrary
to popular notion, I'm still alive and still writing.
The JAG muses haven't been talking to me much lately, though.
"What If" changed that. I
was sitting here checking my email when my "Spiderman" started talking
to me. I'll do anything for my Clay,
so here's the result.
The title comes from the poem, Lucile, by Edward Robert, Earl of
Lytton.
Dedications:
As always, this is dedicated to my father:
"Everywhere I am, there you'll be."
We'll be together again at the wedding supper of the Lamb!
Thanks to my fabulous betas: Jess, Mel, Christina, and
Kim!!
I've known it all along.
I've known it since that first case.
I saw it in their eyes. There
was a connection… immediate and unbreakable.
She trusted Him with her uncle. He
trusted Her with his life. There was
no room for anyone else.
I tried though. I kept coming back.
I kept involving them in my cases. I
wanted Her to see me… not Him… me.
Finally, it looked like I was getting what I wanted.
What I'd dreamed about since I first met Her.
She saw me! She chose me!
I chose not to see the inevitable.
Something changed that night--the night she couldn't see me because there was a
promotion party for Coates. I could
hear it in her voice.
I could see it anew in the way they looked at each other.
I found excuses to stay away even more than before.
Out of sight, out of mind, so to speak.
If I didn't see it everyday, it wasn't true.
I can't do this anymore.
I can't pretend. I have to
let go. All I want is for Her to be
happy. In the end, I know only He
can make Her truly happy. She'd
pretend, but He'd always be in the background.
"Sarah, we have to talk."
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