A Precious Life, part 1Author: Rorie Rating: PG-13 Notes: Dedication: This is dedicated to my parents, who know what it's like to wait while a child struggles to live in the NICU. I love you two. Thanks for not letting me give up when I was in the Unit. COOK COUNTY
GENERAL HOSPITAL, ER "GSW to the chest incoming... ETA... now." Nurse Carol Hathaway-Ross yelled towards the corridor where the doctors were gowning up to meet the ambulance, before gowning up herself and running to join them. "What do you have?" Dr. Mark Greene asked the paramedics who were wheeling in a gurney. "Pregnant female, mid-thirties, shot twice in the chest. Pulse 150 and thready, BP 90/palp. Found unconscious at the scene, hasn't regained consciousness. IV normal saline hung at scene... no other drugs administered." the male paramedic recounted as Carol wrote down information. "Here's her purse." the female paramedic said, handing it to Nurse Chuny Marquez. "What's open, Jerry?" Mark yelled as the pushed the gurney down the hallway. "Trauma 2." Jerry Markovic, one of the unit secretaries yelled back. They pushed the gurney into Trauma 2 and next to the bed in the room, "Okay, people on my count..." Mark said, "One, two, three." With that they transferred the injured woman from the gurney to the bed. The paramedics moved the gurney out of the room. "What's her name, Chuny?" Carol asked. Chuny glanced inside the purse, "Sarah." she answered. "Get a surgical consult down here on the double, and get me an ultrasound STAT." Mark ordered as the nurses jumped to do what was necessary. Dr. Susan Lewis came into the room, "Need any help in here, Mark?" "Thanks, Susan, it looks like the bullets missed the great vessels, but breath sounds are diminished on the left... can you insert a chest tube for me?" "Sure thing, Mark. Thoracentesis kit, 14 french chest tube." Chuny handed Susan the necessary items. After delicately cutting into the patient's chest and inserting a tube, Susan had Chuny hook up the Thoraclex container. It immediately began filling up with red fluid. There was blood in the cavity that the lung normally filled. Just then, Carol came back in pushing the ultrasound machine. Mark snatched the wand and gel and squirted some on the patient's abdomen and chest. Carol turned on the monitor... Mark moved the wand... silence filled the room... all of a sudden, the picture they had been hoping to see popped up on the screen... a perfectly healthy fetus... uninjured and seemingly unaffected by the grave situation its mother was now in. Carol smiled and let out the breath she had been holding. Mark moved the wand to the patient's chest... "There... one bullet is lodged in the left lung, there's another in the heart... she's tampanading.... Where's that surgical consult?" "Right here." Dr. Elizabeth Corday said breathlessly in her charming British accent. "What do you have for me?" "Pregnant female, 2 GSW to the chest... one in the left lung, the other in the cardiac muscle... she's got a tampanade." Susan Lewis relayed to the surgeon. "Call OR, book a room and have a cardiac team ready... and an OB on standby. We're bringing her right up." Elizabeth and several of the nurses wheeled the bed to the elevator for the trip to the surgical floor. "And find her next of kin." Carol went back to the nurses' station where Chuny was going through Sarah's purse. "Have you found anything to locate someone for her?" Chuny pulled a wallet out of the purse, she flipped through and found an "In Case of Emergency" card. "Here we go: Harmon Rabb, there's a work and a home phone... looks like DC area." She looked at her watch, "I'll try the work number." JAG
HEADQUARTERS The phone was ringing in Cmdr. Harmon Rabb, Jr.'s office... he wasn't in it. Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts went in and picked up the phone, "Cmdr. Rabb's office." ::Harmon Rabb?:: a female voice, with the barest trace of a Spanish accent, asked. "Umm, no, ma'am, he's in court right now. This is Lt. Cmdr. Roberts, may I take a message for the Cmdr.?" ::This is Chuny Marquez. I am an ER nurse at Cook County General in Chicago. A 'Sarah MacKenzie' was brought in about a half-hour ago. Her wallet listed Mr... Cmdr. Rabb as her emergency notification person.:: After a stunned pause, "He's her husband." Bud stated. "What happened?" ::I can't go into the details since you're not family, but she's been taken to surgery and her husband needs to be here.:: "I understand... can you hold for a second..." he put the phone on hold, and pushed another button. "Tiner? I'm going to transfer a call from Cmdr. Rabb's office to you. Could you put it through to the Admiral?" He undid the hold, "Ma'am, I'm going to transfer you to the CO's office." ::Okay.:: Bud transferred the call to Tiner, who transferred it to the Admiral. "Admiral Chegwidden here. What can I do for you?" Chuny restated who she was and why she was calling for Harm. "Col. MacKenzie is in your hospital?" the Admiral asked. ::Umm, yes, Sir. She was taken to surgery.:: "Can you give me some details? I need to be able to tell her husband what's going on." ::Since you're her commanding officer, Sir, I guess I can tell you. She was shot twice in the chest... she has been taken to surgery for repairs of the damaged lung and heart.:: "What about the baby?" A.J. asked. ::We did an ultrasound in the ER, the baby appears unhurt... there's an OB on stand-by for the OR if needed.:: "Thank you, Nurse. I'll send the Cmdr. out there as soon as possible." He hung up the phone, then buzzed Tiner. "Mr. Tiner, is Cmdr. Rabb back from court yet?" "Yes, Sir, he just got back." "Send him in, please." "Aye-aye, Sir." JAG
HEADQUARTERS A knock sounded on the door to the Admiral's office. "Enter." Harm entered the office and snapped to attention in front of A.J.'s desk, "Cmdr. Rabb, reporting as ordered, Sir." "At ease, Commander. Have a seat." Harm looked confused, but sat down in the offered chair. "Harm, I'm afraid that I have some bad news for you. About 15 minutes ago, I received a call from the emergency room at Cook County General in Chicago...." Harm looked up sharply, A.J. could see the worry in his eyes. "Mac was shot in the chest, they've taken her to surgery. The baby's fine. As of right now, you are on personal leave... go and be with your wife, Commander." Harm stood up, in shock, "Thank you, Sir... what happened, Sir?" "I'm not sure, Harm. She was found unconscious at the scene and hadn't regained consciousness before being taken to the operating room. I guess you'll just have to wait until she wakes up again to find out what happened. Now go, before I have to make it an order." "Aye-aye, Sir." COOK COUNTY
GENERAL HOSPITAL Harm rushed through the emergency room doors and over to the nurses' station. "Can I help you, Sir?" a pretty nurse with long, dark curly hair asked. "Yes, I'm looking for my wife... I was told she was taken to surgery around 1400... sorry, I mean 2:00." "It's okay, Sir, we use 24 hour time as well." Carol said with a grin. "What is your wife's name?" "Sarah... Sarah MacKenzie... she's pregnant." "Oh, yes... now I remember. I'm just getting off of my shift. I was going to go check on her anyway. Why don't I take you up to the surgical floor. My name's Carol Ross." she extended her hand. He took the offered hand, "Harm Rabb." Carol led him to the elevator and pushed the button for the surgical floor. They got off of the elevator just as Elizabeth came out of the OR. "Elizabeth, how's it going in there?" Carol asked. "Oh, Carol, it's..." she broke off as she realized there was someone else there. "It's okay, Elizabeth. This is Harm Rabb...Sarah's his wife. Harm, Dr. Corday." "Oh... it was touch and go for a while, but I think everything's under control now. Your wife was shot twice... one bullet went into her left lung, and the other went into the heart. The lung injury was relatively easy to fix, as would her heart injury. However, we had to consider the fact that your wife is pregnant. Everything we do in there affects not only Sarah, but also your baby. We've had an obstetrician on stand by for the entire surgery. So far, we haven't had to consult her. Dr. Romano and Dr. Benton are the best cardio-thoracic surgeons we have... they're almost through. After surgery, Sarah will be taken to the recovery room, then to ICU." "When will I be able to see her?" Harm asked. "As soon as she is moved to the ICU, you'll be allowed to see her. Her surgeons will brief you as soon as she is moved to Recovery." "Thank you, Dr. Corday." "It's perfectly all right, Mr. Rabb. Sarah's a fighter, she'll make it." "I know she will... she's a Marine." he replied quietly, praying silently that it was true. "Why don't you wait over here." Carol said as she led Harm to the family waiting area. "I'll make sure that Drs. Romano and Benton know you're here for Sarah." "Thank you, Carol." "No problem... just be strong for her. She's gonna need you." Carol walked towards the elevator to go home. ROSS HOME Carol walked into the living room of her home. Her husband, Dr. Doug Ross, was sitting on the sofa, reading a newspaper. He looked up and smiled his "little boy" smile. "Hiya, Gorgeous." She walked over and sat down next to him and kissed him passionately. "I love you, Doug." "What was that for? Not that I'm complaining." "I'm just glad that you're here, and we're together, and all right." "Mommeeee!" their three-year-old son yelled as he streaked into the room. Carol gathered her son into her arms and just held him... she was so glad that she was here right now and not where Harm was... waiting to hear if his wife and child were going to be okay. She knew her family was safe. "I love you, Jayson." she whispered into her son's curls. COOK COUNTY
GENERAL HOSPITAL "Mr. Rabb?" a voice said. Harm looked up, a tall black man dressed in surgical scrubs was looking at him, "Yes..." "I'm Dr. Benton, I worked on your wife, Sarah." "How is she?" Harm asked anxiously. "She's been moved to the recovery room. It was rough at first. After repairing her lung, we started on her heart. She nearly crashed on us... her blood pressure dropped through the floor, but we were able to stabilize her. It was tough because of the pregnancy. We were afraid that we would have to sacrifice the child to save the mother... but we didn't. I'm happy to report that both members of your family came through the surgery safely. Your wife will be in recovery for a while, then she'll be moved to the ICU where you'll be welcome to sit with her." "Thank you, Doctor." he put his head in his hands. "I don't know what I'd have done if I lost her... them." Dr. Peter Benton, having learned some sensitivity since the birth of his son, put his hand on Harm's shoulder, conveying that he understood. After the doctor left, Harm pulled out his cell phone and dialed. "Hi, Mom?" ::Harm! What's wrong? You sound terrible. Is it the baby?:: "No, Mom, the baby's fine... it's Mac..." ::What happened, Son?:: "She's in the recovery room here in Chicago. She was shot twice and had to have surgery. I don't know what happened... no one does, except Mac and she's not awake yet to talk." ::Oh, Son, I'm sorry... is there anything Frank and I can do? Do you want us to come out?:: "Not right now, Mom... I just needed someone to listen to me. I don't know anyone here, and I'm scared... what if she doesn't make it, Mom? I don't know if I could live after that." ::Harmon Scott Rabb, Jr., don't you dare talk like that! Sarah's a fighter, a Marine. She's gonna pull through. They both are.:: "Thanks, Mom. I needed that." ::It's okay, Harm. If you need anything... or if you want us to come there, just call me.:: "I will, Mom.... Mom, I love you." ::I love you, too, Son.:: He hung up the phone and decided to take a walk, he wasn't accomplishing anything just sitting here. He went over to the nurses' station and asked them to page him if Mac was moved while he wasn't around. The nurse agreed and gave him directions to the cafeteria. "The food isn't always top notch, but it's hot, and the coffee is usually pretty decent." "Thank you." 0245 ZULU (2145 EST, 2045 CST) Harm was back in the family waiting area. This was getting frustrating... he knew they couldn't move Mac until she came out from under the effects of the anesthesia, but did it normally take this long? "Mr. Rabb?" Harm looked up, "Yes?" "They've moved Sarah to the ICU. If you'd follow me, I'll take you there." "Thank you." As they walked to the ICU, the nurse tried to prepare Harm for what Sarah would look like. "She's going to be attached to many tubes and lines, so she will not look quite like herself." Even with the warning, he gasped when he saw his normally tough, "by-the-book" Marine wife just lying there in the bed. She was so pale, her face was almost the same shade as the sheets she was sleeping on, her dark hair standing out in stark contrast. There were so many monitors and tubes around her that she could've left the bed and no one would be able to tell the difference unless one of the gizmos started beeping. The nurse pointed to some of the different monitors. "That one, above the bed, is monitoring Sarah's pulse, respirations, blood pressure, and oxygen level. The other one over here is monitoring the baby's pulse." Harm glanced over at the fetal monitor, the baby's heart beat looked pretty good to him, of course, he didn't know what the pattern was supposed to look like for an unborn baby. "Is the baby's heartbeat okay?" he asked. The nurse looked at the monitor, "Well, I'm not an OB nurse, but it looks perfect to me." She moved to pull a chair up next to Sarah's bed. "I'll leave you now, don't hesitate to use the call button if you need anything, or if she starts to wake up." "Thank you." The nurse left the room. Harm sat down in the chair and found Mac's hand. "I'm here, Sarah." He stared at her for a while, "Sarah, you have to wake up... you have to make it... for me, for the baby... for us. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. You're my whole life. If you left me, I'd have no reason to keep on living." his voice cracked, and tears were running down his face. He bent over and kissed the hand he was holding. Suddenly, he looked up, he could have sworn her hand moved, but when he looked at her face, there was no change. He sat there in silence, willing the love of his life to wake up and give him one of her "light-up-a-room" smiles that normally made him go weak in the knees. Eventually, he fell asleep with his head on the bed next to Mac, his hand still holding on to hers as if he were her lifeline. //He is walking in a forest... the sunlight streams through the trees, dappling the ground with pools of light. A child's laughter rings on the breeze that ruffles the leaves. He stops and looks around, but sees no one. He keeps walking. Someone calls his name, "Harm?" Again, he stops and looks around, still no one there. Suddenly, the sky turns dark and threatening... the wind howls through the formerly peaceful forest. It is getting colder. The voice that had called his name now screams it, terror filling the voice, "HARM???" He turns and runs towards where the voice came from... he recognizes it. "Mac!!! Sarah, where are you?!" He runs, but isn't seeming to get anywhere. Mac is still screaming his name... the child's laughter is now crying. "Sarah? Where are you? Why can't I see you?" He stops... it's useless. He can't move out of this area... he can't get to her. Dread fills his heart. A voice echoes through the forest... "Why didn't you protect her?" Another voice echoes... "If she dies, it's your fault." "Your fault... your fault... your fault..." echoes through the trees. Suddenly, she's standing in front of him, blood pouring out of the wounds in her chest. "Sarah!" "Harm, help me..." she says as she falls to the ground. "No, Sarah." he drops to the ground next to his wife and cradles her in his arms. She opens her eyes, the pain evident in them, "I love you, Flyboy." She takes another ragged breath, then nothing. "NO, SARAH.... MAC, NO!!!!"// COOK COUNTY
GENERAL HOSPITAL A nurse rushed into the room. There were alarms going off all over the room. Harm stood up quickly to get out of the way as more personnel ran in. "Mr. Rabb, you're gonna have to wait outside." the first nurse said over her shoulder as she moved a monitor to give better access to the patient in the bed. Harm left the room and started pacing in the hallway... he wondered what was going on with Sarah, why had those monitors started alarming? "Code Blue to the ICU... Code Blue to the ICU..." Suddenly, there were more people rushing into his wife's room... a nurse was dragging one of those machines used to restart people's hearts... he had seen one used on that medical show on TV. Harm stood outside Mac's room, wishing he could be in there with her, and that someone would tell him what the hell was going on. Finally, a tense 15 minutes later, Mac would have had the time down to the second. a nurse came out of the room and over to him... she was followed out by the rest of the code team. "Mr. Rabb, Sarah's heart stopped beating. We managed to get it restarted. However, the time without a heartbeat has affected the baby. We need to get her back to surgery and deliver the baby by cesarean. How far along is your wife?" "Almost 25 weeks.... Will the baby be able to survive this soon?" "I can't answer that... some do, others don't. It's up to the baby and God." A doctor came up to them, "I'm Dr. Coburn." she said. "I'll be doing the c-section. We will have a team from the neonatal intensive care unit standing by. We will do everything to make sure that both Sarah and the baby survive. There's some paperwork that will need filled out. Jennie will help you with that." She indicated the nurse that had initiated the conversation. "Mr. Rabb, this way please." Jennie led Harm to the nurses' station to get the paperwork done. She could see the pain and worry in his eyes. "Don't worry, Dr. Coburn is the best obstetrician on staff, and our NICU team is the tops. They'll make sure that your family comes through this." She laid a hand on his arm. "Is there anyone we can call for you?" "No, thank you. Let's get the paperwork done." Jennie handed him a clipboard with a stack of paperwork: surgical permits and forms on what they should do if the unthinkable happened and either the baby or Mac didn't survive. He finished filling out the forms in a daze, and handed the clipboard back to Jennie. He went into Sarah's room where some transporters were getting her situated on a gurney to be moved to the OR. "Can I have a moment?" Harm asked. The men nodded and left the room, one pausing at the door, "Five minutes." Harm took Mac's hand. "Sarah, I love you." He bent down and kissed her gently. "Fight, Marine. Fight for yourself and the baby. Don't leave me. I don't know how I'd live. Mac, you're going to go to surgery now. They have to deliver the baby now. Don't be scared, I'll be waiting right here for you when you get back." The transporters returned and prepared to take Sarah to surgery. Harm reluctantly let go of her hand. "I love you, Marine... be strong my Ninja Girl." SURGICAL FAMILY
WAITING ROOM Harm sat in tense silence. Did c-sections usually take this long? What if something went wrong? His thoughts were going in a million different ways at once, and none of them were places he wanted to be. Suddenly, a hand touched him on his shoulder, he jumped, startled. "I'm sorry, Harm, if I startled you." a cultured British voice said. Harm looked up into the beautiful eyes of Dr. Elizabeth Corday. "It's okay, Dr. Corday. The thoughts I was having needed to be startled out of me." "You're worried about Sarah, aren't you?" she asked gently as she sat down next to Harm on a sofa. "Yes, what if she doesn't make it... what if the baby doesn't live? I don't know what I'd do without them." Elizabeth smiled, "Harm, the best surgical team is in there working on saving your baby. Sarah's a fighter, I can tell... the fact that she made it to the ER alive earlier, and then survived the surgery tells me that." Harm smiled, barely a ghost of his patented flyboy grins, but a smile nonetheless. "Thank you, Dr. Corday." "No problem, Harm." she said taking his hand and squeezing it reassuringly. She then got up to leave, "I've got to make rounds. I'll check back on you two later." "Thank you." Elizabeth left Harm to his thoughts. Finally, someone came out of the surgical suite to talk to Harm. "Mr. Rabb?" "Yes." Harm said, standing up quickly. "Your wife came through the surgery beautifully... no complications. She'll be moved back to the ICU very shortly." "And the baby..." Harm said, in a very worried voice. The nurse smiled, "You have a beautiful little girl. She's very tiny... just over 2 pounds. Her lungs weren't quite ready to breathe on their own yet, she has been put in an incubator with ventilator to help her breathe. Our finest NICU staff will be doing everything possible to make sure that she lives to grow up." Harm took a shuddering breath... he had a daughter, but for how long... "Can I see her?" "Of course, I'll take you to the NICU right now. Follow me." Harm nodded and followed the man to an elevator for the ride to the pediatric floor where the NICU was located. When they reached the NICU, Harm was given a gown to put on over his clothes. The nurse introduced Harm to the charge nurse in the NICU, "Mr. Rabb, this is Erin, she's the head of the NICU, she'll show you around and let you see your little girl." Harm thanked the man before the nurse left to go back to the surgical floor. "Mr. Rabb, if you'd come this way." Erin said, gesturing towards where several incubators were set up. Harm just nodded, he was overwhelmed. So much had happened today. He had almost lost his wife and child twice, his daughter was born, and he still could lose them both. Erin showed the Commander to one of the incubators. "Mr. Rabb, this is your daughter." Harm looked down at the tiny girl, there were wires and tubes all over. Erin explained, "The one in her mouth is hooked to the ventilator to help her breathe. The one down her nose is a feeding tube. The IVs in her scalp and foot veins are supplying fluids and a prophylactic antibiotic to ensure she doesn't get an infection. The patches over her eyes are to protect them from the lights in here, as her eyes are not strong as they should be yet." Harm started to tear up, she looked so fragile, but he could definitely see her mother in the tiny face... she had Mac's nose, and he hoped, her eyes as well. "What color are her eyes?" he asked. Erin chuckled, "The same color as most babies' eyes, blue. Of course, they may change to a different color by the time she's a year old." Harm smiled. "How soon before we can hold her?" he really wanted to connect with his daughter. "Not for a while, but you can touch her. In fact, she needs to be touched. We've found that human contact actually helps babies this small to develop and grow." Erin showed Harm how to put his hands through the openings on the incubator and touch his daughter. Harm was amazed at how soft her skin was, and how delicate she felt. He was sure that a stiff breeze would break her. "It's amazing how resilient babies are, even ones this small." Erin said, almost as if she had read Harm's mind. Which wasn't too far off, she had worked in the NICU for many years and had seen this scene played many times, and almost all parents were thinking the same thing. Just then a doctor came in, "Excuse me." Erin said as she walked over to talk to him. A few moments later, the doctor walked over to Harm. "Mr. Rabb, I'm Dr. Fisher. I'm your daughter's doctor. Do you have any questions I can answer right now?" Harm just shook his head 'no.' "Okay, if you come up with any, don't hesitate to ask me or to have one of the nurses ask me. I'm sorry, but I need to examine her right now. Maybe you could go check on your wife. It won't take more than half-an-hour, then you may return." Harm nodded and left to go see Sarah. MAC'S ROOM IN
THE ICU Harm walked in to his wife's room, she was so still. She was so beautiful, she looked like an angel, her dark hair fanned out around her face. He just wanted her to wake up so that he could tell her about their daughter, so he could hold her, so he could hear her voice. He sat in the chair situated next to the bed and just watched her, hoping for a sign of movement. Harm was startled by the ringing of his cell phone, "Rabb." ::Harm, it's Mom.:: "Mom, I'm glad you called... I was just about to call you." He wasn't, but he knew he was going to have to make the calls sooner or later. ::What for, Son? Is it Sarah... the baby?:: "Well, actually both, Mom. Sarah's heart stopped again..." ::Oh, my God! Harm, is she all right?:: "They got it started again, but they had to do a cesarean to save the baby. Mom, you've got a granddaughter. Sarah hasn't woken up yet, and I'm terrified. What if they don't make it?" ::Harm, calm down. They'll make it... Sarah's a fighter, and so is the baby... she's part Sarah and part you... all stubborn.:: "Thanks, Mom. She's so tiny... so fragile... so beautiful. I can't imagine not having her in my life...." ::Harm, we're on our way... no arguments. You need me, and I need to be there.:: Harm didn't argue with his mother, he knew she was right. "I love you, Mom." ::I love you, Son. See you in a couple of hours.:: She hung up the phone. Harm dialed another number... he knew there were still a few hours left before anyone in DC would be getting up to go to work, but he still called.... ::Chegwidden here.:: a sleepy, but stern voice on the other end said. "I'm sorry to wake you, Sir." Harm replied. ::Harm, what's up... are the Colonel and the baby all right?:: "I don't know, Sir. They had to deliver the baby... a girl... but she's so premature, I don't know if she'll make it. And Mac still hasn't woken up. Sir, I can't lose them... I just can't." ::Commander, don't think like that... that's an order.:: A.J.'s voice softened, ::Son, is there anything I can do for you?:: "No, Sir, just pray for them." ::That I will, Harm. Take all the time you need... You and Mac are both on leave until both she and the baby are able to come home. Take care of yourself, Harm, you won't do either of them any good, by letting yourself get exhausted and ill.:: "Yes, Sir, I will. Thank you, Sir." ::Harm, does your mother know? Do you need me to call her?:: "Yes, Sir, she knows. In fact, she and Frank are on their way here. Thank you for the offer. Will you tell Bud and Harriet the situation for me, Sir?" ::Of course, Harm. Now get off of this phone and take care of your wife and daughter.:: "Aye-aye, Sir." Harm got off of the phone and leaned forward and took his wife's hand, "Sarah. I know you can hear me. We have a daughter. She's so tiny, but she's so beautiful, like her mother. Sarah, come back to me... you have to wake up, Sarah. She needs you... I need you. You're the other half of my soul." he whispered, a tear running down his face. 1215 ZULU (0715 EST, 0615 CST) Trish Burnett rushed up to the surgical floor and to Mac's room, looking in she saw her son asleep with his head laying on the bed next to Sarah, who was hooked up to all sorts of tubes and machines. His hand clutched hers tightly. Trish stepped lightly over to Harm and put her hand on his shoulder, he started and then saw who is was. "Mom?" he stood up. She just opened her arms and he stepped into their circle. They both cried and held onto each other. Frank came into the room, "Harm, son? Any change?" "No, Frank, no change." "I'll sit with her for a while." Frank offered, "Why don't you and your mom go see the baby." The baby. Harm had almost forgotten about her in his worry for Mac. "All right." he said and led Trish to the elevator. Reaching the NICU, the pair gowned up and went in. Erin was still on duty. "Mr. Rabb, welcome back." she said walking over to the pair. "Erin, are you still here?" Harm asked. "Not for much later... my replacement comes on at 7." she replied, then she looked over at Trish. "Oh, Erin, this is my mother, Trish. Mom, this is Erin, she's the head nurse for the NICU." "It's a pleasure to meet you, Erin." Trish said softly. "Likewise, but you didn't come to meet me, you came to meet your granddaughter." she said, leading Harm and Trish over to the baby's incubator. "I'll leave you two alone with her." Harm put his hand through one of the incubator openings and stroked the tiny girl's back. "I'm here, Sweetie. Daddy's here." he crooned. Trish put her hand through the other and touched her granddaughter's tiny head. "Harm, she's beautiful." she said, her voice cracking. Harm removed his hand, "Just a second, Mom, I'll be right back." Trish just nodded in response. Harm went over to where Erin was doing paperwork. "Excuse me, can you tell me what Dr. Fisher said about my daughter?" "Of course," she pulled a chart from the pile and read some notes. "Actually, other than being so premature, your daughter is very healthy. She is exactly where we would expect a baby at her stage of gestation to be. Your wife took very good care of the both of them. Her lungs are immature, but will develop normally. Her heart is strong, her hearing appears to be normal. He was unable to assess her eyesight yet. He doesn't anticipate any stumbling blocks to normal development, if she survives. Of course, this is all speculation. The big job belongs to her. I can tell you, from experience, that girls born this early have a better survival rate than boys. There seems to be a stronger survival instinct in girls. My staff will do everything we can to foster that instinct in your daughter and make sure she survives." "Thank you." Harm said, returning to his mother and daughter. As he reached the pair, he could hear Trish softly singing to the tiny baby. He recognized the song as a lullaby that she used to sing to him. A smile crossed his features. MAC'S ROOM IN
THE ICU Frank sat watching his daughter-in-law. She looked like she was sleeping, but he knew she was still in a coma. He reached over and took her hand, avoiding the IV lines that were snaking from it. "Sarah, listen to me. You have to wake up." he started, a tear coursing down his cheek. "Sarah, Harm needs you... your daughter needs you. You have to fight." Frank took a deep breath, then continued. "Sarah, we all love you. You're the daughter Trish and I never had. Please come back to us." Frank let his thoughts drift back to when Harm was younger. Harm hated him... Harm thought that Frank was trying to take the place of his father. That was never true, Frank never wanted to replace Harm, Sr. He wanted his own unique relationship with the boy that he considered his son. When Trish got pregnant when Harm was 15, the relationship got even worse, if that was possible. Now Harm felt that he was being replaced as well. When Trish miscarried, Harm blamed Frank for that, too. He shouldn't have gotten her pregnant and put her into danger. Slowly the relationship changed from the heat of outright hate on Harm's part to the coolness of two strangers living in the same house. Frank knew it affected Trish... she loved both of her men and wanted so much for them to love each other. Then Harm had met Mac, things started changing. In his relationship with her, Harm started to see what he was missing in other relationships. He started seeing what he had put Frank and his mother through. Frank loved Sarah wholeheartedly... she had given him the greatest gift anyone could... she had given him his son. He leaned down and kissed Mac's cheek, "Sarah, thank you for Harm... and, now, for my granddaughter." SARAH'S ROOM IN
THE ICU Harm walked back into the room slowly. The tableau before him brought tears to his eyes. Sarah was still lying motionless, the various monitors marking her life. His stepfather, Frank, was sitting next to the bed, his larger hand clasping Sarah's smaller one tightly. He was whispering something to her. Harm couldn't hear what it was. He wondered what the man that had raised him was saying to the woman he loved more than life. Harm moved over next to Frank. He put his hand on the older man's shoulder. Frank stood up quickly. "Where's your mom?" he asked. "She stayed with the baby." Harm answered. "Would you like to see her?" Frank nodded. Harm leaned down and whispered to Mac, "I'll be right back, Ninja-girl. I'm taking Frank to meet his granddaughter. Harm led his stepfather to the NICU and turned him over to Trish, then he walked back to Sarah's side. Harm sat in the chair that Frank had vacated and picked up his wife's limp hand. "Sarah, wake up. Ninja-girl, it's time. You need to come back to us now. Frank and Mom are with our daughter. Sarah, she's beautiful... perfect... and she needs her mother." Tears ran freely down Harm's cheeks and dripped onto their combined hands. Harm lifted his head as a soft hand caressed his head. "Mom? "Frank and I are gonna go get some breakfast. Would you like something, Son?" "No, thanks, Mom. I don't need anything... except for my wife to wake up." "I know, Baby." Trish said quietly. "She'll wake up when she's ready. Right now her body needs time to heal." 1530 ZULU (1030 EST, 0930 CST) Harm stared out the window into the hallway of the quiet ICU ward. It wasn't silent in the ward, in fact, it was a hive of activity... machines beeping, people calling orders back and forth. However, the atmosphere exuded quietness. It made you want to whisper when you were there, even though there was no real reason to. Suddenly, a sound inside the room caught his attention. He turned around in time to see his Sarah's eyelids flutter. He crossed over to her quickly and caught up her hand. "Come on, Sarah, open those eyes. I want to look into them." he said as he stroked her hand. "Harm?" a very quiet, scratchy voice said. Mac's eyes slid open slowly. She blinked a couple of times because of the light that intruded into her darkness. "I'm right here, Marine." Harm said in a soft voice that held worlds of relief. "Harm, what happened?" she asked, her eyes focusing on her now flat abdomen. "Where's the baby?" Mac's voice betrayed a rising panic. "Sarah, honey, it's okay. She's safe." "She?" "Yes, Ninja-girl. We have a beautiful daughter. She's in the NICU right now." "Is she... will she be all right?" Mac asked, a catch in her voice. "I don't know, Honey." Harm answered honestly. "I hope so." Harm leaned over and placed a feather light kiss on his wife's forehead before pulling the call light to summon a nurse. "Can I help you, Mr. Rabb?" the nurse asked as she walked into the room. "Yes..." he said stepping away from the bed so that the nurse could see that the patient was now awake. "I'll go get the doctor." she said, running out of the room. 1745 ZULU (1245 EST, 1145 CST) By now, Frank and Trish had returned. They were both thrilled to see their Sarah awake and talking. Trish had cautioned her son against pushing for information too soon. When Sarah was ready she'd tell them what had happened the day before. Frank disappeared for a few minutes. When he returned he handed Sarah a Polaroid picture. She looked at it, a tear snaked its way down her face. "Oh, Harm, she's beautiful, and so tiny." Harm took her hand, "I know, but we have to have hope, Sarah. She's part of us, she'll make it. She has to." The room fell silent. Each one lost in thought and prayer for the tiny girl who was fighting for her life one floor up. Finally, Trish broke the silence. "We need to give her a name. We can't keep calling her the baby." "You're right, Mom." Harm replied. "Sarah?" Mac nodded. "We hadn't even discussed girls' names yet, Harm." "I know, Honey." Frank spoke up quietly. "Your sister's name was Madelynne, Harm." Trish sucked in a breath and gasped. Frank moved to put his arm around his wife. Harm looked at Sarah who nodded with a smile. "Mom?" Harm queried softly. "Would you mind if we called our daughter Madelynne after her?" Trish looked up at her son with tears in her eyes. "Of course not, Harm. I think that's a beautiful idea." "Madelynne... Madelynne..." Harm began. "Madelynne Hope Rabb." Sarah finished. "We have to have Hope, Harm." 2233 ZULU (1733 EST, 1633 CST) Harm returned to Sarah's room after making another visit to see their daughter. He had finally convinced Frank and Trish to go to a hotel and get some rest. "How is she, Harm?" "She's holding her own right now, Sarah." he answered as he reached his wife's side. She had been allowed to have the head of the bed put into an upright position so that she could sit up. She would probably be moved to a private room outside of the ICU the next day. "Have you called the Admiral or Bud and Harriet?" Mac asked. "Not since early this morning. I probably should give them an update." Harm said, pulling his cell phone out of his pocket. He dialed the number for JAG headquarters knowing that they would all still be at the office. "Tiner, this is Cmdr. Rabb, put me through to the Admiral, please." ::Cmdr. Rabb, right away, Sir.:: Harm heard a click, then, ::Chegwidden.:: "Sir, it's Harm." ::Harm, how are you doing?:: "I'm fine, Sir. Mac's awake, Sir. She'll probably be moved out of the ICU tomorrow." ::Glad to hear it, Son. And the baby?:: "Holding her own, Sir. We've named her Madelynne Hope." ::Rabb, that's a beautiful name.:: "Thank you, Sir. Are Bud and Harriet still in the office?" ::Yes, they are. Just a moment, Harm.:: Harm was put on hold, then, ::Sir? How are Sarah and the baby?:: "Harriet, why don't you ask her yourself." Harm said, handing the phone to Mac. "Harriet!" Mac began. 0017 ZULU (1917 EST, 1817 CST) A knock sounded on the open doorway. Harm looked up expecting to see his mother and Frank. It wasn't. "Harm, they told me that Sarah had come out of the coma." Carol Ross said quietly. "Yes, Carol, she did. She's asleep right now." Harm said, indicating his wife. "No, I'm not, Flyboy." a sleepy voice responded. "Mac, you should be asleep..." "Maybe I should come back later." Carol said. "No, come in." Harm said. Carol came completely into the room. "Well, Sarah, you're looking a lot better than you did when I saw you yesterday." she said with a smile. "Thanks.... I think." Mac replied with an answering smile. "Sarah, this is Carol Ross. She works down in the ER. She was there when they brought you in." "Well, I guess, in that case, I'm glad to meet you, Carol." Mac said. "Likewise, Sarah. I see that you've had the baby." A shadow passed over Mac's face. "Yes, they had to deliver her by c-section yesterday." "How is she?" Carol asked quietly, concern written all over her face. "She's holding her own for now." Harm answered. Carol put her hand on Harm's arm in a gesture of comfort. "I'll keep her, and you, in my prayers." "Thank you, Carol." Mac said, stifling a yawn. Carol saw the yawn and turned to leave. "You need your rest, Sarah. I'll show myself out." After the nurse had left, Mac settled down against her pillow. "Go get some rest, Flyboy." she ordered. "I'm not leaving you and Madelynne." Harm protested. "Harm, please, for me... I... we need you to be alert and rested. Don't make yourself sick...." Reluctantly, he let his wife talk him into leaving for a few hours. He left to join his mother and Frank at their hotel. |
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