A Precious Life, part 2Feedback is welcomed at: rorie.brianne(at)nospamcomcast.net MAC'S ROOM Trish Burnett walked into her daughter-in-law's room. Mac was sitting in a chair by the window, staring out over the grounds of the hospital. The sunlight streamed in and reflected off of Mac's hair, creating a halo effect around her head. Trish smiled at the image it made. "Are you going to come all the way in, or were you planning to camp out in my doorway all day?" Mac asked with a chuckle. Trish laughed and crossed over to Sarah. "How are you feeling today, Honey?" she asked as she leaned down and wrapped an arm around Sarah's shoulders. "Much better now that they are letting me out of that bed. I was even allowed to have a shower today... just had to keep the bandages dry." Mac said, as if she were relaying the greatest accomplishment in history. "That's good, Mac." Trish said, sincerely. "Mom?" "Hmmm?" "Would you take me to see Madelynne?" Sarah asked quietly. "Don't you want Harm with you when you meet her for the first time?" "I don't know... I... I just need to see her now. He's not here.... I sent him to get himself some breakfast. He was driving me nuts hovering over me...." Trish chuckled, "Sarah, he loves you... he's just worried about you... both." "I know... so will you take me?" "Of course, Dear." NICU Trish pushed Mac in a wheelchair, laden with her various IVs, to the NICU. At the entrance they gowned up to help keep the environment as clean as possible. Trish was startled to see that Erin Robbins was on duty at that time. "Erin, I thought you worked the night shift." "I do, Mrs. Burnett, but one of my nurses called in sick and her replacement couldn't come in until noon today, so I got to work some extra hours." Erin answered. "Well, I'm glad that you're here. This is Sarah, my daughter-in-law. She'd like to meet her daughter." Trish said, indicating Mac. "Mac, this is Erin, she's in charge here." "It's nice to meet you." Mac said, softly. "Likewise, Sarah, but I think Maddie would like to meet you as well." Erin answered, as she propelled the wheelchair over to where Madelynne lay in her incubator. Sarah saw her baby girl lying in the bed. She was so tiny, so fragile, that it brought tears to her eyes. Erin showed her how to put her hands inside the isolette to stroke the little girl. Sarah stroked her daughter's soft head and crooned to her, "Mommy's here, Maddie. Mommy's here." She turned to look at Trish, who was standing at the end of the bed. "Mom, she's so tiny... I'm sorry, it's my fault that she's in here like this... I should have known better...." "Sarah Catherine Rabb, you did nothing wrong... it is not your fault... it's the fault of the person who shot you. You can't blame yourself... it won't do either of you any good." Trish said, "Right now, you need to concentrate on getting better so that you can help your daughter get better." "I know..." Mac said, quietly. "It's just hard to see her like this, Mom. What if she doesn't make it? I'll have to live my entire life knowing that one lapse in judgment on my part killed my daughter." "Sarah," Trish began, hesitantly, "What happened the day you were shot? Why is it your fault?" "I... I..." Mac began, "I need to talk to Harm... he needs to know what happened. He needs to know why I almost died, and why our daughter is in here fighting for her life." She took a deep breath, and gasped at the pain it caused. "I'll tell all of you at the same time... and I hope you'll be able to forgive me." Sarah took another deep breath even though she knew it would cause her pain. She felt that she deserved that pain, it was nothing compared to the pain in her heart... her baby may be dying and it was her fault. MAC'S ROOM Harm and Frank were waiting for them when Sarah and Trish returned to Sarah's room. Mac managed a smile, "I went to see Madelynne." she said, quietly. "She's absolutely beautiful." Harm crossed the room and helped his wife into the chair by the window, "Yes, she is." he said, dropping a kiss on her cheek. Mac took a deep breath, ignoring the now familiar pain. "Harm, there's something I have to say... to all of you." "What is it, Sarah?" Harm asked, suddenly concerned. "I need to explain why we're all here." she began. Harm cut her off, "Sarah, you don't have...." "Yes, I do...." Harm nodded, and sat on the other chair that he had pulled over to where Mac was. Frank and Trish sat on the edge of Mac's bed. "You know I was defending Petty Officer Paul Marsdan from Great Lakes. He was accused of drunk and disorderly. Nothing that I couldn't handle. I knew he had a history of violence, he had been accused of beating his girlfriend in the past, but was never convicted. The day of the shooting..." she paused, "The day of the shooting he called me and asked me to meet him. I agreed, even though I had some doubts about meeting him alone. He was my client and I was pledged to defend him to the best of my ability... I chose to believe in his innocence... a mistake that almost cost me my life... and may still cost our daughter her life." She stopped, a tear running down her cheek. Harm stood up and moved to put his arm around her. She rested her head on his shoulder for a moment before continuing. "We met at a small café, it was practically deserted, not one of the more popular spots. He wasn't too happy about the tactics that I was using in his defense. He was sure we'd lose if I continued in that vein. I listened to his concerns and agreed to take them under advisement. When we left, I walked to my car, parked in the alley behind the restaurant, there was no other place to park. PO Marsdan called out to me, when I turned to answer him, he fired... that's all I remember, other than the hurried prayer for Maddie that flitted through my brain." "Oh, honey." Harm gasped, pulling Mac to him. "It wasn't your fault... it was Marsdan's fault... not yours, never yours." "Yes, it was... I should have known better...." Harm just held her as he felt her body shake with silent sobs, as her tears soaked his shirt. She was feeling guilty and there was nothing he could do to convince her otherwise.... NICU Erin Robbins had just started her shift 15 minutes earlier. Report had been given, everyone was holding their own, it had been a pretty good day. She headed over to check on her favorite patient. Theoretically, she couldn't have a favorite patient, but, in practice, there was always one patient or another that would just capture her heart. This time is was her youngest patient, Madelynne Rabb. She was the most pre-term of their preemies, but she was still fighting. Erin stuck her hand into the isolette and stroked the baby's downy head. "How are you this evening, Miss Maddie?" she whispered. The tiny girl seemed to snuggle into her hand. Erin smiled. She left Maddie to check on her other charges and to do some paperwork while it was quiet. She knew that soon enough it would be time for diaper changes and feedings and medications. Erin was in the middle of working on a discharge plan sheet for one of "her" children who would be going home in the next couple of days when the klaxon of a monitor shattered the peaceful atmosphere of the room. She jumped out of her seat and looked around to see whose alarms were going off. Madelynne had gone into respiratory distress... Erin called for a nurse to page the neonatalogist on call as she opened up the isolette so that she could have access to the tiny girl. "Come on, Maddie... breathe..." she ordered rubbing the girl's back, as the child struggled to get a breath, fighting the respirator which had been doing all of the work for her. The neonatalogist on call rushed in. "Erin, what's going on?" she asked quickly. "Madelynne Rabb is in distress, Jessica. She's fighting the vent." Dr. Jessica Dykeman moved to isolette containing the distressed patient. She did a quick visual assessment. "I need a head ultrasound, check for IVH." She then listened to the baby's lungs. "She's got a pneumothorax, I need a chest tube kit." "Yes, Doctor." Erin answered, running to get the ultrasound machine and directing another nurse to assist with the chest tube. Erin dragged the ultrasound over to the isolette and hooked it up. She turned it on and spread some gel on the wand. She ran the wand over Maddie's head, being careful to stay out of the way of the doctor who was inserting a very tiny chest tube into the infant's chest. "There!" Erin exclaimed, pointing to a dark image on the child's brain. "My God, she's got a grade 3 bleed." Jessica looked at the screen, "Is this the first ultrasound she's had done?" "Yes, it is, Doctor." Erin answered quietly. "Damn, this could have been caught earlier." "What caused it?" "With the combination of a pneumothorax, I'd say that the vent pressure went too high and burst some vessels in the brain along with the alveoli." "Should I call her parents?" another nurse asked. "Her mother is here on the surgical ward... she shouldn't be disturbed. Her father's cell number is taped to the chart. Contact him." "Right away, Erin." the nurse said heading for the desk. MAC'S ROOM Harm was startled awake by the chiming of his cell phone. "Rabb." ::Mr. Rabb, this is Katie, I'm a nurse in the NICU...:: Harm became instantly alert. "Yes, what is it? Is it Maddie?" he fired questions at the woman. ::Sir, I'm afraid that your daughter had gone into respiratory distress. The neonatalogist on call is here. She inserted a chest tube.:: Mac stirred, "Harm?" she asked, sleepily. "Go back to sleep, Love." he said, not wanting to worry her. "Should I come up?" he asked the nurse on the phone. ::Yes, Sir. The doctor and Erin need to talk to you.:: "Okay, I'll be right up." Harm said, hanging up the phone. "Harm, what is it?" Mac said, sitting up, now fully awake. "Is it Maddie?" "Yes, Sarah. The nurse said she's having some difficulty. I'm going to go upstairs and find out what's going on." "I'm going, too." "Mac, you need your rest..." "Harm, she's my daughter... I want to go." she stated emphatically. "Now you can either help me or get out of my way, because I'm going." Harm sighed in resignation. He wasn't going to win this one. He helped Mac out of bed and into a robe. He then helped her get settled in her wheelchair, hanging IVs on the poles. Quietly, they went to the NICU to find out what was going on with their little girl. NICU Harm and Sarah were met at the entrance to the NICU by Katie, the nurse who had called. She helped Mac gown up to enter the unit. Once inside, Dr. Dykeman and Erin took them aside to explain the situation while Katie monitored Maddie's vitals. "Harm, Sarah, this is Jessica Dykeman, the neonatalogist." Erin said, introducing her colleague. "Mr. and Mrs. Rabb, I'm afraid Maddie's situation is serious." Jessica began, no preamble, no beating around the bush. "She has developed an air leak in her lungs and an intraventricular hemorrhage in her brain. They were most likely the result of the pressure from her ventilator. In infants as preterm as your daughter, the lung tissue and the blood vessels are very fragile. Any changes in the pressure can cause ruptures." She paused, "I've put in a chest tube to vent the air out of the body and let the damaged lung re-expand to fill it chest cavity normally. Much like the one that you have, Sarah." she said, pointing to Mac's own chest tube. "It will give the lung tissue the chance to heal and seal up the leak." "But... I thought that Dr. Fisher said that she was doing well... her heart was strong." Harm began. "Yes, her heart is strong for a baby at her gestational age. Sarah, you did a good job keeping her healthy. However, she is still very premature. She had another 15 weeks to develop in the womb. She is exactly where we would expect a baby at her development to be, but most babies aren't ready to be born at this stage." Jessica paused, "Harm, Sarah, I have to be honest with you. Babies this premature usually only have a 40% chance of survival. That doesn't mean, however, that we're going to give up on Maddie. We're going to do all we can to make sure she beats the odds, but you need to be prepared." Mac had been silent this entire time. "The hemorrhage in her brain, how bad is it? Will it cause permanent brain damage if she lives?" "It's a grade 3 out of 4 bleed. With this grade she is at an increased risk for brain damage, but she won't necessarily have any damage. A lot of times the body just slowly reabsorbs the blood. She is also at risk for developing hydrocephaly, or fluid on the brain, if her body doesn't reabsorb the excess fluid. She'll be monitored closely." Jessica explained. "Thank you." Mac said quietly, fighting the tears that sprang to her eyes. "Would you like to hold her?" the doctor asked softly. Mac looked up startled, "We were told that we wouldn't be able to hold her for a while." "I know, but I don't want you to never be able to hold her while she's alive... if she doesn't make it." Jessica said. Mac sighed and nodded. Erin wheeled her over to where a rocking chair was sitting. She helped Mac get settled then went over to the isolette and picked up Maddie carefully. She brought the baby over to Mac and arranged her in her mother's arms, making sure that the various tubes and lines weren't tangled or kinked in any way. Mac just stared down at her daughter. Erin had removed the eye patches so that she could make eye contact with her mother. Maddie's blue eyes struggled open and looked at her mother. Mac smiled and tears coursed down her cheeks as she rocked. Harm came and stood behind his girls. "Mac," he said softly, "I'm going to call Mom and Frank. I'll be right back." Mac just nodded. Harm left the unit. HALLWAY OUTSIDE THE NICU Harm stepped out into the quiet of the hallway and sat down on the bench that waited for patients and family to use it. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed. "Mom? I'm sorry to wake you..." ::You didn't we were still up...what is it?:: "Mom," Harm began, his voice cracking slightly, "It's Maddie, she's gone into respiratory distress. Evidently, she has an air leak in her lungs and a hemorrhage in her brain." He paused, "Mom, it doesn't look good." ::Oh, God, Harm, we're on our way.:: Trish said quietly. ::We'll see you in a few.:: "All right, Mom." Harm said and hung up. He then dialed another number. ::Chegwidden.:: "I'm sorry, Sir. It's Maddie. She's in trouble, Sir. The doctor isn't too hopeful that she'll make it." ::Harm, I'm sorry. I'll tell the Roberts. We'll be praying for her.... How's Mac?:: "She's taking it well. The doctor is letting her hold the baby right now... it's the first time, Sir." ::I understand.:: "Thank you, Sir." Harm said before hanging up and going back into the NICU to be with his family. Mac carefully handed the baby to Katie and stood up. "Harm, sit." she ordered. He did, and Katie handed him his tiny daughter. He smiled as he watched the baby. "Hi, Sweetie. It's Daddy. I want you to try, Baby. Try for us." MAC'S ROOM Mac laid on her bed, half asleep. She didn't want to fall asleep, but her own injuries on top of the emotionally draining night were wearing her down. Harm was sitting on the edge of the bed, his arm lying over Mac's waist. Trish and Frank had the two chairs in the room. They had arrived in the NICU within ten minutes of Harm's call. They had both been allowed to hold their granddaughter, before the doctor decided that Maddie needed to be reexamined. There had been no change, her breathing had improved some with the addition of the chest tube, but the hemorrhage was still bleeding, and there were no signs that it was planning on stopping any time soon. Suddenly, a knock shattered the silence of the room. Dr. Elizabeth Corday stepped in tentatively. "Come in, Dr. Corday." Harm said from his place on the bed. "Harm, how are you doing?" Elizabeth asked quietly. "As well as can be expected." he answered. "Dr. Corday, this is my mother, Trish, and her husband, Frank." he said indicating the couple. "And you already know my wife, Sarah." Mac stirred and sat up, "It's nice to meet you finally, Dr. Corday." she said. "Yes, the last time I saw you, you were under anesthetic." Elizabeth said. Mac smiled then settled back down on the bed. "Harm, how's the baby?" Elizabeth asked. "It doesn't look good, Dr. Corday." he answered. "She has a pneumothorax and a hemorrhage in the brain." "I'm sorry, Harm." Elizabeth said. "I had better get back to my rounds. I just wanted to check on you." "Thanks, Doctor." Harm said as Elizabeth left the room. 1200 ZULU (0700 EST, 0600 CST) Another knock woke Harm up. He had changed his position so that he was now sleeping on the bed next to his wife. He carefully got up without disturbing her. Trish and Frank were both asleep in their chairs, neither had wanted to leave the hospital, no matter how much Harm and Mac urged them to. Harm moved to the door, "Admiral!" he said, stunned to see his CO standing there. "Come in." AJ entered the room, followed by Bud and Harriet Roberts. "How is she?" AJ asked, indicating Mac who was still asleep. "Physically, she's doing great. Her injuries are healing nicely. The chest tube should come out today.... Mentally, that's a different story. She's taking all of this in stride. Outwardly, she's calm and collected. But, inwardly, Sir, this is tearing her apart. I can see it in her eyes. She blames herself for this whole thing." "I know, Harm." AJ answered. "Harm?" a sleepy voice asked. Harm rushed over to Mac's side. "It's okay, Sarah. It's just the Admiral and Bud and Harriet." Mac sat up, "Sir, Bud, Harriet, what are you doing here?" she asked. She realized how that sounded, "I'm sorry, Sir." "No need to be sorry, Mac." AJ said, "We thought that you two needed support from your friends." "Thank you." Mac said quietly. Harriet moved over to Mac's side. "Sarah, how are you holding up?" "I'm fine, Harriet. I just want my baby to get well." A tear snaked it's way down Mac's cheek, the only outward sign that this entire situation was getting to her. Harriet put her arms around Mac's shoulders and whispered, "You're allowed to show feelings, Ma'am. No one expects you to be a rock right now." "Thanks, Harriet." Meanwhile, Frank and Trish had woken up. "Admiral, it's nice to see you again." "Thank you, Mrs. Burnett. I only wish it was under better circumstances." Frank suggested that the guys go get some coffee for the group. He sensed that the women wanted to talk. AJ, Bud, Harm, and Frank left to go to the cafeteria. After the men had left, Mac finally broke down. Trish sat on one side of her and Harriet took the other side. They just held on to her and let her cry. "I feel so helpless... that's my baby in there fighting for her life and I can't do anything about it." Mac said, gasping for breath. "It's my fault... my fault." The other two women didn't know what to say to her so they just held onto her and let her cry. CAFETERIA The men found a table and sat down with their coffee. "This is tearing Mac apart. She blames herself, Sir. I tried to tell her that it wasn't her fault, it was PO Marsdan's fault, but she'll have none of it." "Harm, what exactly happened with PO Marsdan?" AJ asked quietly. "Well, Sir..." Harm began. ~~~ "That's why Sarah blames herself. She thinks that she should have known better." Harm finished telling the others what happened the day of the shooting. "It's not her fault, Commander." Bud said. "No, it's not. I'm assigning McCaye and Edwards to investigate and prosecute Marsdan for attempted murder, and if Madelynne dies, murder." AJ stated emphatically. "Thank you, Sir. Jess and Kate are good choices." Harm said. MAC'S ROOM The men rejoined the ladies and gave them their coffee. Now it was up to the doctors, nurses, and God, whether or not this story would have a happy ending. All they could do now was wait. MAC'S ROOM The chiming of a cell phone broke into the silence of the room. Seven people looked up, "It's mine." AJ announced. A collective sigh of relief was felt, it wasn't the bad news that was hanging over their heads like a sword waiting to fall. "Chegwidden... Yes, Tiner, put her on... You're in charge, Commander, do whatever you think is right... Keep me apprised." AJ hung up the phone. "Carolyn says that Mattoni and Martin are fighting over which tactic to use in their defense of Ensign Carter. She thinks that she might have to reassign one or the other of them." "Alan and Jack were partnered? Who's bright idea was that?" Mac asked sarcastically. She looked up and saw the look in her CO's eyes, "I'm sorry, Sir." "No need to apologize, Colonel. I'll admit it wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done. It ranks right up there with leaving Brumby in charge of the office." Everyone laughed, it was true. Brumby didn't have the tact to run the office. He just made things worse. No one was very sorry to see him go back to Australia at the end of his exchange program. Okay, maybe, Lt. Saxon was upset. She resigned her commission and moved to Australia. The last anyone had heard, they were happily married with a baby on the way. 1645 ZULU (1145 EST, 1045 CST) Another cell phone broke into the reverie. "Mine again." the Admiral said. "Chegwidden.... Honey, what is it?... How bad?.... I'm sure she'll be fine.... Sweetheart, teething babies often get fevers.... Francesca went through this many times, and she turned out fine.... If in gets worse, call the pediatrician.... I know, I love you both. Give Amy a kiss for me." He hung up the phone. "She has the ear of the President, and sits on several congressional committees, but a baby's fever can still turn her into putty." AJ chuckled. "Sir, it's normal..." Bud said, giving his wife a significant look. "Harriet ran the JAG office with no problems, but when ever AJ got sick she would fall apart." "Bud!" Harriet exclaimed with mock horror, as she playfully slapped her husband's arm. "Ouch, Harriet! Well, it's true... but you lightened up with Sally." "Gee, thanks, I think...." 1739 ZULU (1239 EST, 1139 CST) A knock on the door signaled the doctor's return. She asked everyone except Harm to leave so that she could check Mac's wounds. "Well, Sarah, the cesarean incision looks good, as does the chest incisions. I think I can remove the tube now, since you've had it clamped since last night without any problems." The doctor carefully pulled out the tube, pulled the "purse string" sutures closed and quickly placed an airtight dressing over the hole. She didn't want to screw with the natural negative pressure in the chest cavity and have to reinsert the tube. She listened to Mac's lungs, "Good breath sounds... I think you're coming along nicely." "Thank you, Doctor." Mac said. "You're welcome, Sarah. I'll send your friends back in now." she said as she left. A few moments later, the others filed back in. "Well?" Trish asked. "She said the incisions looked good, and she pulled the chest tube. One less leash to worry about. Now if they'd only remove these IVs, I'd be a much happier camper." Mac answered. 1920 ZULU (1420 EST, 1320 CST) It was quiet in the room. Bud and Harriet had gone to the cafeteria to grab some lunch. Frank and the Admiral had stepped out onto the terrace that was set aside for smokers. Neither smoked, but they wanted to get some fresh air. Trish sat on her chair and stared out the window. Harm sat on the edge of the bed, Sarah in his arms. Suddenly, the hospital intercom blared on, "Dr. Dykeman to the NICU STAT... Dr. Dykeman to the NICU STAT!" "Oh, my God, Harm... Maddie!" Sarah cried, pulling out of Harm's arms. "We don't know that for sure, Sarah." he soothed. "She's the neonatalogist on call, there are other babies in the Unit right now." "No, Harm, it's her... I know." Just then, Harm's cell phone chimed. "Rabb... Yes, I understand... We'll be right there." "Harm?" Trish asked. "Mom, get Frank. We need to go to the unit. The nurse doesn't think it will be long now." "Oh, God." Trish said, leaving the room to get her husband. Harm went out to the nurses' station and asked them to page the Roberts to the NICU. Trish came over with Frank and AJ, Mac came out, minus the wheelchair and they headed for the elevator. They were met on the pediatric floor by Bud and Harriet. Harriet immediately put her arms around Mac. Mac pulled out and headed for the Unit. Bud, Harriet, AJ, Frank, and Trish sat on the benches outside the Unit, while Harm and Sarah entered. After they gowned up, Melissa, another NICU nurse met them at the door. "Mr. and Mrs. Rabb, I'm afraid that Maddie isn't going to make it. She's fighting the ventilator, her breathing is getting worse. The hemorrhage has been upgraded to a 4. It's not good." she said sympathetically. Mac nodded and headed over to where Jessica Dykeman was working on her daughter. "Sarah, Harm, you need to make a decision." Jessica began. "Do you want us to continue to keep her alive aggressively, or do you want to discontinue the respirator and other measures and let her go?" "Can we think about it?" Harm asked. "Yes, but not long." Harm whispered that he'd be back and he left to update the people outside the Unit. When he returned, he put his arms around Sarah who was stroking their daughter's head through the isolette holes. "Harm," she began with tears in her eyes, "I think we should let her go peacefully. We shouldn't prolong her suffering any more." Harm looked at the baby and nodded. "I know, Sarah, it's just that she's our baby." Mac didn't answer. Harm moved to where Dr. Dykeman was checking another baby. "Doctor?" "Yes?" "We've decided. We want the machines removed. She needs to go peacefully." "Okay." Jessica answered. She hated this part of her job... where she deliberately removed the means of survival from one of her tiny charges. She felt for the parents every time. After she had finished her assessment of the other baby, she called Melissa over. "Go get the grandparents and others. Bring them in to the office." "Yes, Doctor." Melissa said as she left to get the family. "Sarah, Harm. I'm going to extubate her now. Then we'll discontinue the IVs. After that, you can take her into the office. Your family and friends are waiting there for you. You can be alone with your daughter." "Thank you." Harm answered as he held Mac close, sobs shaking her body. Melissa came back in the room. "Are you ready, Doctor?" "Yes." Jessica said. They pulled on gloves and proceeded to remove the various tubes and wires that had been sustaining baby Madelynne Hope Rabb's life. A lifetime later, or actually, a few moments later, Melissa laid the tiny child in Mac's arms and led them to the office where their family and friends waited. Song is "Visitor From Heaven" written and sung by Twila Paris. It is available on her Beyond a Dream album. CEMETERY A tiny white coffin rested on bars at the opening of a hole, cut deeply into the ground, that marred the tranquil sea of green. A blanket of white and pink roses covered the top of the tiny box. A row of chairs sat several feet away from the scar in the earth. Harmon and Sarah Rabb sat in the first two chairs, Frank and Trish Burnett in the next two. Harm sat ramrod straight as he stared at the hole that would soon contain the body of his baby girl. Not her spirit, that can never be buried. Sarah also sat ramrod straight. Not a single tear graced her ashen cheeks. She really shouldn't have been out of the hospital this soon after her shooting and surgery, but nothing would have kept her away from this service. The other chairs were filled with other members of the JAG family. Adm. Chegwidden sat with his wife, Sen. Bobbie Latham, who held their daughter close to her body. Bud and Harriet Roberts sat in silence. Harriet's shoulders shaking with the tears that she cried for Harm, Mac, and Maddie. Petty Officer Kevin Tiner sat with his arm around his wife, Kelly, who was visibly pregnant. Alan Mattoni and his wife, Jackie, were also in attendance, as were Carolyn Imes and her fiancé, Jack, who had replaced Cmdr. Brumby when he had returned to Australia. Gunny Galindez completed the JAG contingent. Officers and enlisted all banded together in their grief at the loss of the tiny child that none of them'd had time to get to know. Clayton Webb stood behind his wife, Sandy's, chair, his hand on her shoulder. Jack Keeter stood next to his wife, Shelly, who held their sleeping infant son. In the back of the group stood some other mourners, some that had actually met the tiny child. The ones who had worked to save both her life and that of her mother. Representing Cook County General Hospital in Chicago, Doug and Carol Ross, Elizabeth Corday, and Erin Robbins. That was unusual. Normally, the nurse and doctors worked hard to maintain their professional detachment. However, this case touched all of their lives in some way. They couldn't stay away, they needed to show their support for the grieving family of the tiny baby. Sarah still stared straight ahead, hearing nothing of the beautiful words of comfort spoken by the chaplain or by the Admiral. She was lost in her own world populated only by her grief. She refused to be comforted by words or by her husband's presence. She blamed herself, she should have never agreed to meet PO Marsdan by herself. She knew that he had a history of violence, but she chose to believe in her client's innocence. She didn't notice when Shelly Keeter handed her son to her husband and walked to the front of the group. "Harm came to me and asked me to sing something for Maddie." she said, a slight catch in her voice. "I was listening to an album at a friend's house when a song came on that touched me and seemed to express all of the feelings that we all are experiencing in this time. Shelly took a deep breath and began to sing in a very clear soprano: "A visitor from Heaven A visitor from Heaven With aching hearts and empty arms A visitor from Heaven With breaking hearts and open hands When she finished, Shelly rejoined Jack and her son. Suddenly, a sound erupted from the front row of chairs. Sarah had broken down. She had slipped off of the chair to her knees on the ground. Heedless, of the dirt and the pain from her wounds. Her entire body shook with the sobs that threatened to engulf the Marine. Harm slipped out of his chair and sat next to his wife on the ground. He pulled her to his chest and rocked back and forth, his voice whispering soothing words in her ear. They sat like that for several minutes. Everyone else watched helpless to do anything to comfort the grieving mother. Finally, Harm helped Mac up and back into her chair, holding her close to him. The chaplain led the group in prayer to finish the service. Standing, Harm began to lead Mac past the coffin to the car. She stopped and bent down to touch the smooth surface of the box. She pulled one of the roses from the blanket and held it to her heart as she let her husband lead her away. Stopping a few feet away, Harm knelt down in front of a white headstone that marked the final resting place of his grandmother, Sarah Rabb. Next to her stone, there were two other stones that commemorated the lives of her husband, Ben, and her son, Harmon Rabb, Sr., even though neither of those men rested there. "Gran," Harm whispered, "Gramps, Dad, take care of her for us." Harm stood up and headed back towards the car. BETHESDA NAVAL
HOSPITAL Cmdr. Harmon Rabb, Jr. rushed down the hallway and into a room. "What kept you, Flyboy?" Mac asked from the bed in the center of the room. "It took longer than we expected for the panel to return a verdict in the Simmons court martial." he answered. "So where's the reason I came here?" "Hmph, I'm hurt, Sailor. I thought I was the reason you were here." Mac said with a fake pout. Harm headed over to her, and kissed her gently. "Of course, you're the reason I'm here. I meant where's the other reason that I'm here?" "He's in the nursery." Mac said as she picked up the telephone receiver. She punched a button and told the nurse that they wanted to see their son. A few minutes later, a nurse came in pushing a bassinet. "Here he is, Mommy." she said, handing the tiny baby to his mother. "So, Mom, have we decided what to call this little man?" "Matthew, after my uncle." Mac said decisively. "I like it." Harm said. "Matthew Francis...." Mac looked up at her husband, a question in her deep brown eyes. "After Frank... my father." Mac nodded and smiled, tears misting her eyes. She knew what it took for Harm to say that. "Matthew Francis Rabb, welcome to the family." Harm came over and took the boy from Sarah. She watched him as he held their son and whispered to him. She smiled. This pregnancy had been different from her earlier one. Harm had hovered protectively the entire time. He protested vehemently every time the Admiral sent her on an out-of-town case. He worried over every little twinge and pain. It had driven her nuts. She had threatened more than once to "kick his six from here to the no-fly zone." But, now, watching her guys together, it was worth it. "Maddie, baby, you have a little brother." Sarah whispered softly. "I miss you... and I love you." "I love you, Mommy." echoed through her mind, bringing with it a peaceful feeling. She knew that there would always be someone watching out for her son. The End.... |
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