January 2006 Sally Says: Sally David and Tommy Epp

I asked Tommy if he would like to take a picture for Daddy. For accessories, he chose a Wild Thing and a Miss Spider bucket worn as a hat. He also took all his clothes off while I was in the other room getting the camera. Fabulous!

His favorite movie is Toy Story 2. Other favorite movies include Madagascar, Finding Nemo, Monster's Inc., Fantasia, Alice in Wonderland, Kiki's Delivery Service and parts of The Incredibles.

His favorite book is Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. He says "Ooo Ahh Ahh" on each of the Wild Rumpus pages. Other favorite books include Tall by Jez Alborough, Bugs Bugs Bugs by Bob Barner, Ten in the Den by John Butler, From Head to Toe by Eric Carle, Wiggle Waggle by Jonathan London, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie by Laura Numeroff, Curious George and the Bunny by H.A. Rey, No David! by David Shannon, and Ten Terrible Dinosaurs by Paul Stickland,

His favorite TV show is Little Bear. He also really likes Max & Ruby, Miss Spider, Dragon Tales, Dora the Explorer, Go Diego Go!, Blue's Clues and Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends.

His favorite character is Buzz Lightyear. Other favorites are the Thomas & Percy trains, Little Bear, Mr. Potato Head, Mickey Mouse, Chicken Little, Dash & Mr. Incredible, and Nemo & the Shark from Finding Nemo.

Yes, we watch a lot of TV and movies. I'm not going to apologize for that. Tommy is going to be MUCH more pop-culture savvy when he gets to school than I was. Hopefully, he'll also be a sensitive, intelligent individual who is not afraid to be different.

His current security object is Small Buzz. I spend a lot of time every day watching over Small Buzz, making sure I know where he is at all times.

The toys he plays with the most are his trains, his Little People zoo and garage sets, toy tools, toy cars & trucks, balls, and his various toys of favorite characters.

His favorite groups of things are dinosaurs, trains, ocean creatures, and zoo animals.

He loves to run around without clothes whenever I let him, and always fights putting clothes on, no matter how ice-cold his little body might get.

He loves to climb up onto something, compare his height to other things and people around him, and declare that he's "tall!" He got this from the book Tall by Jez Alborough.

His favorite animals are sharks, red-eyed tree frogs, zebras, polar bears, lions...eh, there are too many so this is kind of a pointless list.

He's very empathetic and sensitive. He says "Sorry" all the time, although he may just do this because I say it way more often than I ought to. We do guilt early in our family! (Just kidding.) We're actually trying to get him to say it less often. He says it whenever he bumps into someone (good). He also says it when he hurts himself (bad). He says it to people and toys and animals. If anyone trips or seems to be hurt or upset, he always asks them if they're all right, "OK Mama?" He really does care about their answer. Then he wants to give them a kiss and asks "That better?" He's very aware of how people are feeling and wants to follow his established routine actions and phrases anytime someone seems hurt of upset.

He loves to run. I can't wait until it gets warmer again so we can run at the park every day instead of up and down the hall or inside stores. He also loves to jump and to be tickled.

He loves to pretend to be scared and to pretend to scare people. I think this is some sort of role-play activity that helps him not to be truly scared in real life. He'll say "Boo!" or "Roar!" at us and expects us to pretend to be scared. Then he asks "I scared you?" He does this over and over and over. He also loves for us to do it to him. He shrieks and falls down every time. In real life, the only thing that scares him so far seems to be dogs.

He acts shy and covers his face anytime strangers talk to him when we're out. I don't think he's really scared of them, but he certainly doesn't want them to talk to him. I tell him not to be shy, but maybe I shouldn't do that. I don't know. I hope it's just a stage.

I just realized that I've been dating every entry this month as '05 instead of '06. Why didn't somebody tell me?

Tommy's birthday party yesterday was a great success. I was really happy with how everything turned out. It hasn't felt like I've thrown a truly successful party since we moved into the house, but this one was great. It was relaxing and everyone seemed to have a good time and enjoyed the food. I'm not trying to toot my own horn or anything. I'm just really happy that everything came together well.

It was a Nemo/Ocean themed party. We didn't have many decorations, just a birthday banner, a dozen helium balloons and Tommy's various Nemo toys. Balloons are a wonderful thing when you're two. David and I tried to put up streamers the night before...and the less said about that the better. For food, we had sliced turkey, ham and cheeses, nice breads, veggies with ranch dip, fruit salad and cake. All the food was kid-friendly so even the kids sat down to eat.

Tommy and his three friends had lots of fun playing and opening presents. They even enjoyed my one toddler-friendly party game -- sticking photos of tropical fish onto a poster-board fish tank. Tommy was happy the whole time (mostly) and didn't say "mine!" too often when the other kids played with his toys. His only unhappy time was when everyone started singing Happy Birthday. He didn't like it, but he was polite and resisted yelling "no singing!" He hid behind some toys with a terrified look on his face until we finished. He recovered immediately because there was a candle to blow out. He loves blowing out candles. By the time people were starting to get their coats to leave Tommy was back in the bedroom playing by himself on our bed, pretending to sleep. He really had fun playing with all the people, but was ready for them to go away so he could take a nap. He napped for three hours.

Tommy's birthday party is tomorrow and his actual birthday is Sunday, so I'm sure to have lots of pictures to post over the weekend. I should have something meaningful to say about how my baby is turning two, but I write so much every day that I can't really think of anything right now. I'll think about it over the weekend.

David leaves Sunday for the annual important conference that makes him miss Tommy's and my birthday every year. He'll be back Feb 3rd, the day after my birthday. Next week would be a good time to call me if you've been trying to find a good time. (Hint. Hint.) I hate that he always has to be gone over our special days and in the middle of winter when it's harder to entertain ourselves. On a more positive note, this conference will be in Orlando the next two years so Tommy might get to spend his 3rd and 4th birthdays with Mickey Mouse...if we can manage to not spend all our extra money on have-to travel again this year.

Tommy's current favorite phrase is "That better?" It comes out like "Dhat betturrrr?" with a lilt on the end. He says it anytime he does anything to something else - moves a glass, pulls off his pants, closes the book I'm reading. I usually answer "yes" even when a more honest answer would be "no."

He's decided that he likes dancing, especially in imitation of others. He'll dance along with TV characters or with us. Mostly, his dancing consists of spinning until he falls down, but sometimes he adds arm motions or bouncing. He can exactly mimic surprisingly complex actions, but then his broad and fine motor skills have always been good. I've figured out that I can get him to let me sing toddler songs with him if I make up dance motions for them. We were doing "Sally the Camel" last night (highly superior to Alice the Camel) when I heard him say something I never thought he'd say to me. "More singing!" I know I make it sound like he really doesn't like music, but this isn't completely true. He may not like it when I sing, and he hates it if I rhythmically bounce or sway along to music while holding him, but he loves to play his bongo drums, mini-xylophone and recorder. We bought him a harmonica, but he hasn't figured out how to blow into it yet. He just puts his mouth on it and hums. I think he would love some castanets or wood blocks or other percussion instruments you typically find in kindergarten classes, but I haven't found a good set to buy yet.

I've probably mentioned that Tommy is obsessed with playing in his darkened room. I think that's why he's started carrying a foot stool around to reach the light switches. His crazy mommy is always turning the lights on and doesn't she know he wants them off? I don't mind playing in the dark during the day when there's some light peeking around the shade, but it's really dark in there after the sun sets, especially right after he turns off his light. My eyes just don't adjust that quickly. I usually let him play in there by himself if he insists on turning the light off in the evening. He loves it. David has discovered what Tommy does to get around in his dark room at this time of day. He crawls on his hands and knees with his head on the floor until he bumps into something. I don't think that sounds like much fun, but Tommy obviously enjoys it. At least he's figured out how to play in the dark without hurting himself. What I don't understand is why he'll play in the dark on and off all day long, but he turns on his lamp as soon as we leave the room when it's time for him to sleep. He falls asleep in the La-Z-Boy with the light on every night.

Hilarious evening entertainment, in three easy steps. Push. Fall. Land. (Boy howdy, do I need a new camera with a faster shutter speed!)

Playing in the leaves with Eric and Karen while David and I were out on our date. Yes, they now know that we didn't rake the leaves in the backyard last fall. They're now in a nice pile. Thanks guys!

Tommy got up before 4:30 am both Saturday and Sunday mornings. He was just as tired as I was by 7 am. Stupid leaking diapers. Stupid molars that are taking forever to finish coming in. Poor baby keeps rubbing his cheeks and jaw and wimpering.

We went out for our 10th anniversary yesterday! Thank you to our friends Eric and Karen for watching Tommy. Tommy has finally reached the point where he's happy to play with other people for a few hours and doesn't freak out when we leave the house. When it was time for us to leave, he was sitting on his bed with Karen, "reading" Brown Bear, Brown Bear to her. He even said "Bye Mama, bye Daddy" when we left. We had a mid-afternoon meal (drunch!) at Outback (David's favorite restaurant) and went to a movie (Casanova - very entertaining). It's hard to believe we used to do that sort of thing twice a week before Tommy was born. Eric, Karen and Tommy spent time playing outside, probably watched less TV than if David and I were in charge, and ate dinner together. We were gone from 3-7. We realized while we were out that this was the first time we'd seen a movie in the theater together since Tommy's birth. We take turns going out to movies alone 2-3 times a month, but Tommy's schedule never really allowed us to go out together before now.

I hate to admit it, but a diaper leak at 4 am yesterday helped this happen. Tommy couldn't go back to sleep once I'd gotten him and the sheets changed, so his day started really early. That made it easy for him to nap well and early yesterday. I'm always worried about leaving him with other people when he's missed a nap, and if he'd napped too late in the day then we wouldn't have had time for both a meal and a movie. After he'd napped for 3 hours, we started getting a bit concerned, but David came up with an ingenious way to wake him up without resulting in a cranky, melt-down, groggy toddler. At 2:30 David knocked on Tommy's door. He heard some mumbling and muttering and then Tommy seemed to settle back to sleep. David knocked again. After a few seconds, Tommy came to the door, opened it and was ready to start playing. Good thinking David! If we wake him up by going into his room, it takes him a long time to really wake up and he's usually really, really cranky all afternoon. This way, Tommy's little subconscious thought he'd woken up on his own. He was in a super-good mood by the time Eric and Karen arrived.

Scene: Tommy is standing at the back corner of the TV, peering intently at the various cords.

I walk down the hall. Tommy doesn't follow. I go back into the living room and Tommy still looking at the TV cords.

I think we're ready to start the early stages of potty training - nothing intensive, just letting him sit there frequently in the hopes that something will happen. I've been trying to buy the right stuff for weeks now, but he's such a tall boy that it's kind of frustrating. All the stand-alone potties are too small -- way too small. We have a toilet seat insert that is an OK size, but none of the stools I've tried are tall enough for him to climb up there himself. Then there's the whole positioning aspect that has to be considered for little boys. I'm clueless in that respect, so he'll probably spray the whole bathroom the first time he pees while sitting there...and I'll react unfavorably...and then he'll be uptight about it...eh, I probably worry too much. Right now we have the step-stool portion of a stand-alone potty we can't return with a different insert in the toilet. Tommy wants to be naked all the time and sit on the "poop" every time he thinks of it. (We're trying to use the word "toilet" instead of "potty" for no real reason, but he's stuck on his own word.) My problem is that I'm lazy and don't want to spend 20 minutes out of every hour in the bathroom with him, guarding the toilet paper and lifting him up every 30 seconds. I should do it though, because he'll probably progress really quickly if I do.

The current incarnation of the "mine" obsession involves his legs...during diaper changes. "Crazy parents! Those are my legs. Don't touch them. I'm going to grab my feet and hold them as close to my face as possible, yelling "mine!" over and over in order to thwart your persistent attempts to change my diaper."

He's decided he kind of likes music now. He still doesn't want it playing in the background, and I certainly can't sing songs with him, but he will stand in front of the CD player pushing buttons. When the music comes on he'll bounce up and down "dancing" for a couple of minutes or so. Then he's back to pushing buttons. It's possible he could grow up to be an engineer instead of a musician. Ya think?

We didn't get to go out this weekend. Tommy was just too congested and cranky. He seems to finally be feeling better today. We'll try to go out another weekend.

We've entered the toddler "mine" stage. As in, "That's mine! Don't touch it!" although I guess you could also say we've entered a mine field. He's extremely possessive of anything he's holding. At the grocery store, he's terrified that the checkers are going to permanently take away the box of fruit snacks or straws that I've given him to hold. As soon as we approach the check-out line he starts crying and whining and clinging to whatever it is he's holding. "Mine! No take it!" He does this every time, even though I always just take it away to be scanned and then give it right back. Once he's holding it again, he spends the rest of the time giving the stink-eye to anyone who comes near him, clutching his prize to his chest. I've explained to him that the things at the store belong to the store until we pay for them, and in the past he's really enjoyed taking things out of the cart and handing them to the checker. He liked to hand them the money too. Now he's just obsessed that people are going to take things away from him. Yep! He's almost 2! (His birthday is Jan 29th.)

This is where Tommy fell asleep last night. When I left the room at 7:45 he was in his bed. We didn't hear a peep from him, just the usual click as he turned on his little lamp right after I left the room. (I do offer to leave it on, but he always tells me "turn light off. Mama go out there. Close door peese." At 8:20 I went in to check on him and turn off his lamp. At first, I couldn't find him. I had to quickly leave the room when I discovered him asleep under the table, because I was laughing so hard. I made David go in to see, then I took a picture. The flash on my camera makes it look like the light is on, but it was actually quite dark. He didn't stir. Finally I pulled him out from under the table and put him back in his bed. He didn't wake up at all, and slept until his normal time this morning.

Tommy has until noon today to start feeling well enough for us to go out for our anniversary this weekend. He was feeing really bad yesterday. He seems to feel better this morning, but I want to make sure he's really on the mend before committing to go out. I hope he really is getting better. Of course, I mainly hope that because I don't like him to be miserable, but I also really want to go out. We've only been out without Tommy 3-4 times since he was born. Yeah, we're babysitting slackers. It's not at all that we don't trust other people with him or have some high ideals about spending every moment in his company. We're just really bad at planning things in advance. We're also hindered by the fact that David really hates asking friends for favors and I'm not too comfortable with the idea of hiring strangers to watch for Tommy. We have to do one or the other if we want to go out.

We have had our first positive experience with doing a time-out. Now, there are loads of discipline philosophies out there and I'm not even going to get into all of my thoughts on the matter. Don't judge us for only using distraction and re-direction up to this point. Don't judge us for finally starting to use time-outs. Don't judge us for not spanking. He's a good kid and we're doing the best we can to keep him that way. That's all that matters. (I'm actually getting better at not worrying about what other people think. Really! I am!)

Anyway, a couple of days ago Tommy was running around naked after spending time in a very steamy bathroom combating snot. He did not want to put his diaper and pajamas on for his nap. He wasn't grumpy or angry about it. He just didn't want to stop playing in the nude. I usually let him do what he wants for a little while because he's much more likely to do what I want after a short spell of freedom. Plus, I just don't care about the small stuff. This time, though, he wasn't coming around to my point of view quickly enough. I finally told him he had two choices. He could stand in the corner or we could put his diaper on. No more playing. He cocked his head. He looked at the corner. He looked at the diaper. He yelled "Stand corner!" and ran over there. He was as happy as could be, although he'd occasionally mutter "Stand corner. In trouble! No David! No diaper me." (There's a page in the book No David! where David has to stand in the corner because he broke a vase.) Every time he tried to leave the corner, I asked him if he was ready for his diaper. He would say no, and turn back around. He stayed there for 20 minutes and was happy the whole time. Eventually he turned around and I asked him if he was ready for his diaper again and he said "yep!" and ran over to me and lay down. (lay? laid? lied? I hate that verb.) I think that was pretty successful, don't you? We've done it a couple more times since then, and he must think it's part of the diapering and getting dressed routine or something. He'll run around like crazy for a few minutes until I give him the diaper or corner choice. Then he'll run to the corner, stand there a few minutes calming down and then happily come to me for his diaper. Somehow, I don't think this is how most kids respond to time-outs. Of course, so far I'm using it as a tool to get him to do what I want instead of a punishment.

Tommy asked me to "get pictures" yesterday, so I got the camera out. He's figured out that he can ask to see the picture on the camera right after I take it. He asks me to take pictures of things and then wants to see them. Here are the results of our photo shoot.

Now that I have all my replacement software up and running, I can show you the results of our kitchen makeover.

After. We can't do anything about the pink tile at this time, but at least we got rid of the pink blinds. The wall color is actually quite a few shades darker than white, but I can't figure out a way to show that in pictures. We're not absolutely sure that we picked the right blue yet. It's not quite as bright in real life as it looks here, but it is maybe a few shades darker and brighter than we'd prefer. Knowing us, it's not likely to get repainted. We were thinking of breaking it up with a geometric pattern of another blue on top of it, repeating squares of a paler shade or something. What do you think?

Today is our 10^th wedding anniversary. Yay us! If we all get over our colds by the weekend, we’ll leave Tommy with babysitters and go out to dinner. We went to Cozumel for our 5^th anniversary, but won’t be going anywhere for this one. I had thought maybe Tommy would be weaned by now so we could go away for the weekend, but that’s so not happening. Oh well. Maybe we can do something like that in a few months.

In other news, Tommy’s bedtime went much more smoothly last night. He still has a cold, as do I now, but at least he’s more rested. Also, my software arrived yesterday. I should have the site back to normal after a few hours of fiddling.

A Late Resolution…

I resolve – if we ever have another baby – which we probably won’t – not to brag about how babies who weigh 11 lbs at birth start sleeping through the night at two months – it only leads to karmic sleep-related punishment.

You know how I said he was figuring out how to go to sleep on his own in his new bed at bedtime? I was duped. It’s probably just his miserable cold that’s hampering his progress. I’m very frustrated. He’s only getting about 7 hours of sleep a night (as opposed to 9 ½ or 10) because it’s taking him so long to go to sleep. At least he sleeps relatively well once he falls asleep, despite his cough, and has been sleeping a bit later in the mornings. It’s not enough to make up for the two hours of madness at bedtime though. He’s just exhausted, but as soon as his snot overwhelms him at bedtime he goes into over-stimulated, super-hyper, wild-running-around mode. We try leaving him alone in his dark room – he loves this but doesn’t go to sleep. We try sitting quietly next to him. We try reading calm books. I try nursing. Nothing works until he collapses with exhaustion, sobbing and screaming, and then is finally ready to calm down. After that any of those methods work instantly. It feels like we’re doing everything wrong, but it probably doesn’t really matter what we do. It’s hopeless once he decides going to sleep isn’t working. He’s ready to sleep at bedtime, but everything is different and he’s coughing and can’t breathe, so he just stops trying. Sorry I can’t manage to talk about anything else these days. We’ll get back to a normal routine after he fights off this cold. Hopefully.

Tommy has a cold. He’d just started figuring out the new bedtime routine and now he’s a coughing, sputtering, hacking snot fountain. He hasn’t had a cold in almost six months, so it all seems new to him. He was so much more of a baby six months ago. He slept pretty well last night, but it took a long time to get him to go to sleep at bedtime. He kept getting up to blow his nose. He woke up coughing at 5:10 this morning (near his normal wake-up time), but since he’s been going to sleep so late this past week he was still very tired. He tried nursing in bed with me, got frustrated because his nose was clogged, and then rolled over and went to sleep. He slept there until 6:30. David took my car to work today so we’ll just be dozing around the house today. I expect we’ll watch a lot of TV.

He may be sick, but he still has to gas up all his cars first thing in the morning.

Those of you who know me know that I have strange hiccups. I usually only get 1-3 hiccups at a time, and they’re extremely loud. Last night I had one hiccup. It was a doozy. Tommy looked at me and then said “Hiccup! Need drink?” Then he ran into the kitchen to get me some water. After I took a drink he started to fake hiccup himself. He wanted a drink too.

Is there a 2-year growth spurt? If there is, I think we’re experiencing it. Tommy’s only been up for two hours so far and he’s already eaten a piece of toast, three scrambled eggs, lots of milk and a whole pear. He’s also very whiney and clingy. He’s started cutting his last two molars, so maybe that’s the problem. He only got two of the four over Thanksgiving and the other two are showing up now. Oh, and he went to sleep without a fuss at all last night. He woke up upset about something around 11 pm, but it seems he’s figured out sleeping in his bed.

Just call me the girl who cried wolf. We’ve had some rough bedtimes, but Tommy’s doing remarkably well. He still loves his new bed. He just doesn’t know how to stay in his room and lie still long enough to fall asleep without firm direction from us. We had a breakthrough last night. I was exhausted from putting him back in his room/bed every five minutes so we tried having David do it. We thought Tommy would freak because as much as he loves his Daddy he’s still extremely Mommy-centric. It turns out that the promise of seeing Mommy was his incentive to get up after every small attempt to lie down and go to sleep. He knew what to do – turn off light, lie in bed quietly – he just didn’t stick with it for very long each try because Mommy was just outside waiting for him! Without me as a reward he stayed in his room. He did cry some before falling asleep, but it took maybe 20 minutes instead of the 2 hours it took when I was doing the door guarding. (Locking him in his room was an extreme last resort for us. I’m glad we didn’t have to do it.) He’d open the door to look for me, take one look at David, wail a bit and slam the door shut. David would tell him to go lie on his bed and he did. His mutterings and cries quieted and eventually he fell asleep. He even fell asleep on the bed instead of the chair or floor. He’s taken a nap most days, although I’m nursing him almost to sleep before setting him in his bed and then sitting next to him for a few minutes to make sure he goes to sleep completely. For some reason, this method doesn’t work at bedtime.

Sleeping in the new bed is not going well. I turn into a crazy person when dealing with things like this, so I’m going to take another break from this website. I need to see some light at the end of the tunnel in terms of sleep before I’ll feel like writing again. I also need to go out and buy software before I can put up pictures. I’ll post pictures without text as soon as I can, but you’ll have to wait for things to settle down before you get the joy of reading my rambling thoughts. Actually, you might enjoy the vacation. (See! I’m all sorts of negative when faced with sleep crises.)

Tommy fell asleep in his new bed before we could even get the sheets on it. He fell asleep around 5 pm and we couldn’t get him to wake him for dinner. He didn’t have a nap yesterday and only slept 7 hours the night before so he was really tired. We covered him with warmer blankets and let him sleep. He woke up cold at about 9. Instead of coming to get us or calling for us he just went over to the LayZBoy, turned on the lamp and sat in the chair whimpering until we responded. By that time, he’d peed enough for his mid-afternoon diaper to leak (luckily not on the new mattress) so he was quite miserable. “Jamas peese,” he said in his most pitiful voice. He let us change his diaper and put his pajamas on him and I lay down next to him to settle him back to sleep. He got up a couple more times between 10 and midnight, but did really well considering how exhausted he was and all the changes we’d instituted. He was silent from midnight to 5:45 when I heard some noises coming from his room. By the time I put on warmer clothes and went in to check on him he had turned on the lamp and was sitting on the floor reading books. As I entered the room, he looked up and said “Hi Mama! I waked up and turned light on. Nice new bed.” I guess he likes it.

He posed for this picture in his new bed this morning. It’s a day bed with a wood frame. There’s a trundle bed underneath that we pull out ¾ of the way at night, so that if he falls he’ll only fall onto the lower mattress. Pretty smart, huh? I got him a Finding Nemo comforter too, but even though he likes to have “covers” over him at night I don’t think he’s quite ready for a full-sized comforter.