"SETAY CIRE ELKNUD!" - LONG
LIVE THE CHEESE FACTORY! |
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Last Updated: January 29, 2003 |
You may be asking yourself, who or what is the Cheese Factory? Well,
the Factory is an intangible concept that involves making people laugh and disturbing them
at the same time through the art of filmmaking. If there is a situation or idea that
contains this concept, you better believe that we will be there filming it. |
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| The
following is our complete filmography : |
| (in
chronological order) |
|
| COMING
SOON: THE CHEESE FACTORY CDR |
| Featuring all of
the Factory's films with improved audio & video. |
| Ask a member
about how you can get a copy of our movies on CDR! |
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|
| ROTTEN
CHEESE |
1997 |
| also known as Chris,
Dave, and Sean's 1st movie |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Chris Muller |
| Summary:
We still don't know what's going on in this movie, but we do know there is a panda and an
evil monkey in it. Plus, its the first Cheese Factory production ever, a few years
before the factory is actually formed! |
| Unfortunately our
tape converter is broken and we are in the process of finding a replacement so that we can
transfer this movie to a computer. |
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|
| YOU,
ME, LSD |
2001 |
| also known as the
Biology Movie |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Chris Muller, Rob Robelen |
| Summary:
A depressed teenager turns to LSD to solve his problems. Soon he also has his friend
addicted and the friend becomes a prostitute to help sustain his habit. When one of his
clients goes into denial about his sexuality, he gets mad and kills the depressed
teenager's friend. When the depressed teenager finds his dead friend, he jumps into a
pool. |
| click to download the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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|
| HEAVEN
& HEALTH |
2002 |
| also known as the
Health Movie |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Chris Dunkle, Dave Hasson, Don Kotowski |
| Summary:
After much success with their previous school movie, Sean Cullen and David Hasson once
again make an unforgettable educational video showing the disastorious results of Mary
Jane. This movie which received 110%, the highest ever in Mrs. Bacon's Health Class,
is also the first movie edited by the Factory. |
| click to
download the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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|
| ON
THE FRENCH RIVERIA |
2002 |
| also known as Some
French Title |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Steve Scully |
| Summary:
Two French students and a German student team up and travel to the French Riveria, aka
Historic Old New Castle. Love, Africa, and Streaking are featured in this
ground-breaking movie that pushes the line of what is acceptable to show in a classroom.
Steve Scully's debut in the Factory's movies. |
| click to
download the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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|
| THE
SCIENCE MOVIE |
2002 |
| also known as On
the Streets of Old New Castle |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Chris Dunkle, Dave Hasson, Steve Scully, Eric Yates |
| Summary:
The Factory's most ambitious project to date, this epic is over 20 minutes long and
consisted of multiple angles, sound effects, music, Nuclear Physics, basement drug labs,
and super saturation. Probably the most seen Factory production, this film also is
the debut for Eric Yates. |
| click to download
the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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|
| AFROMAN
music video |
2002 |
| also known as She
Won't Let Me F*ck |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Rob Robelen, Steve Scully |
| Summary:
After the success of "Run Joey Run," the Factory felt that it should make a
sequel, but with different music. Afroman's "She Don't Want to F*ck"
proved to be the perfect source material and what followed, well, is pure genius! |
| click to download the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
| click here to see the lyrics for the song
by Afroman |
|
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|
| OKTOBERFEST
'02 |
2002 |
| also known as the
Family Friendly Cheese Factory Production |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Don Kotowski |
| Summary:
Oktoberfest '02 is actually a side-project made by Sean Cullen to improve his once
struggling German grade. Based on material read in German 3/4, Oktoberfest '02 is a
movie the whole family can enjoy. Featuring a guest appearance by Mr. Wellborn. |
| click to download
the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
|
|
|
| BAD
SANTA |
2002 |
| also known as An
Intimate Look at Race Relations at the North Pole |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Don Kotowski, Dave Hasson, Rob Robelen, Steve Scully, Steve Tuday |
| Summary:
The Factory makes a Christmas movie and explores racial tension in a single movie!
After a failed assassaination attempt, Santa is kidnapped and only A Japanese man, a
Mexican farmer, a Skateboard Elf, and a Jewish man can save him. |
| click to download
the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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| LITERARY
CORNER with Sean Cullen |
2003 |
| also known as the
Pride and Prejudice Reading |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen |
| Summary:
Sean Cullen discusses one of his favorite books and reads a passage outloud for the
audience. |
| click to download the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
|
|
|
| GIVE ME
BACK MY GUN |
2003 |
| also known as Steve
Scully and the Thirty Dollar Orange Jumpsuit |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Chris Muller, Rob Robelen, Steve Scully, plus guest appearances |
| Summary:
A crazed man in an orange jumpsuit attacks Dave because he thinks he has his gun.
Dave attempts to get help from his friends, but fails. |
| Unfortunately, the
tape containing this movie has been damaged and is in the process of being repaired,
please be patient. |
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|
| CHEESE
FACTORY AFTER DARK: night one |
2003 |
| also known as Main
Street Mayhem |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Bernie Hayman, Steve Scully |
| Summary:
In the first installment of the ground-breaking series, Dave and Sean look back at the
Factory and reflect on the words of some influential leaders, Sean and Dave jump out of
Steve's Mom's trunk on Main Street, and Sean falls and bleeds. |
| click to download
the movie (.mov quicktime file) |
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|
| CHEESE
FACTORY AFTER DARK: night two |
2003 |
| also known as Chaos
at the Christiana Mall |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Dave Hasson, Bernie Hayman, Chris Muller, Steve Scully, Eric Yates |
| Summary:
The Factory decides to kick things up a notch in this sequel to the first "After
Dark." In this installment, Bernie is inducted into the Factory, Sean escapes
Steve's Mom's trunk at the Christiana Mall scaring people in the process, Chris' Mom finds
out that his sister did it with a black man, Chris' house is attacked with ground beef
with a twist, and the Factory kidnaps a person. |
| Unfortunately, one
of the tapes containing this movie has been damaged and is in the process of being
repaired, please be patient. |
|
|
|
| AFTER
DARK III |
2003 |
| also known as Disaster
in Delaware City or the Rambo III of Cheese Factory Movies |
| Starring:
Sean Cullen, Chris Dunkle, Dave Hasson, Steve Scully, Eric Yates |
| Summary:
In this underwhelming chapter of the "After Dark" series, the Factory sells out
and ruins a great concept, Steve Scully quits over creative differences, Dave Hasson flees
from the police, the gang gets free soda, and the Factory finds out the hard way that the
State of Delaware closes at 6 pm on Sundays. |
| Unfortunately, one
of the tapes containing this movie has been damaged and is in the process of being
repaired, please be patient. |
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|
| Here
are some details on our upcoming projects: |
| BREAKFAST BRAWL AT
THE CHRISTIANA MALL |
| To
filmed on a weekend morning, Brawl will feature three acts. Act one will focus on
the gang performing exercises in front of the mall while listening to gangster rap.
Act two will be Dave Hasson walking around the mall proposing to the old people walking
around with Sean Cullen playing the acordion in the background. Act three will
involve a member of the Factory racing said old people. |
| "SAY
CHEESE" |
| "Say
Cheese" is the Factory's most ambitious project to date. Conceived as a
mockumentary on the films we make and how we make them, the project may very well use the
services of all the current members of the Factory as well as some nonmembers. |
| HEAVEN & HEALTH
REDUX |
| Sometime
last year, the Factory borrowed Mr. Hershey's copy of the movie to make a copy. With
the recent discovery of the original eight millimeter cassette, we have edited the movie
into a superior version. As a joke, we are also toying around with the idea of
adding some obscene scenes into the movie and returning it to Mr. Hershey, in the hopes
that one day he'll show it to another class. |
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| If you see
anything that is wrong or want to join the Factory, email us. P.S.
All the words belong to Sean. |
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hits since January 19, 2003 |
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