The Life Laws — and what they mean

This is by Dr. Phil. I find it so valuable that I printed it out and hung it on my wall, and I am putting it here so I'll be able to see it easily and often! (-Tina Rock, 5/15/2001)

#1 You either get it or you don't

That means you either understand that YOU are your top priority or... you don't. If you had a history of letting men abuse you physically and emotionally, days will turn into weeks, weeks into months, months into years... until one day you'll wake up and say, "I blew it."

#2 You create your own experience

Whether life treats you fairly or unfairly, you will always be in control of your reaction to it, and that determines where you come out. What you fear you create. If you decide you're going to continue the cycle, you will continue the cycle.

#3 People do what works

Even the most destructive behaviors have a pay-off. Otherwise, we wouldn't engage in them. What behaviors are dragging you down? Figure them out or you're like a puppet on a string.

#4 You can't change what you won't acknowledge

Be truthful about what isn't working and stop making excuses. You've got to face it to replace it. Your blind spots may be the very things you most need to see.

#5 Life rewards action

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions," said Dr. Phil. The road to happiness, however, is paved with action. One action Dr. Phil urges us all to take is to think of the 5-10 most important people in our lives, and tell them how we feel about them. "You shouldn't let the sun set on another day with something unsaid to the people you love."

#6 There is no reality, only perception

We all view the world through filters, many of them, distorted. Some of them may be destroying your life. If you view the world through a dark, distorted filter, your world is going to be a dark, distorted place. If you perceive yourself as weak and vulnerable, you will be.

#7 Life is managed, not cured

No one "solves" life. There's no way to "fix" it permanently. Nobody "arrives" at a place where the work is done. The best any of us can do is manage it through the ups and downs, joys and disappointments. You're a life manager, and you are your only client. Are you going to manage yourself into a place of happiness and accomplishment, or a place of sadness and disappointment?

#8 We teach people how to treat us

This is one Oprah asked Dr. Phil to include in the book. Its meaning is simple: What you've accepted from people in the past is the clearest indicator to them of how they can treat you in the future.

#9 There is power in forgiveness

Anger, hurt and resentment "are the things of which emotional prisons are made," said Dr. Phil. "And those prisons lock from the inside, not the outside." Forgiveness frees you. And the person you're forgiving doesn't have to acknowledge they're wrong or apologize. Don't forgive someone to make them feel better. Do it to make yourself feel better.

#10 You have to name it to claim it

Get clear about what you want and take your turn.

If you do not take it when you should, do not regret it when it is gone.

Web page constructed by Tina Rock.