1993

We don't tax wealth in this country.  We only tax the generation and transfer of it.  And the elite rich wouldn't have it any other way.  Not all rich people mind you, just the ones that we keep electing to political office.

What is the difference between the government taking tax money from you to give to the financially strapped guy down in the projects so that he can buy a house and the guy just coming into your home and taking the money out of your wallet?  Why its so simple.  With the government involved it is illegal for you not to help where as if the government wasn't involved it would be illegal for him to take it.  A pretty good racket no?

We do not have nuclear weapons today because we are greedy, power hungry capitalists.  We have nuclear weapons today because if we didn't get the bomb first during World War II, the Germans or Japanese would have and would have used it to annihilate us and our way of life.

The Devil eventually consumes the soul of even his staunchest advocates.

1994

I always find it so amazing that certain "minority" groups in this country seem to go about making their lives better in such radically different ways.  Some sit around with their hands out to the government for money while others jump off the boat and open a 7-11.  It also never ceases to amaze me how those that stand around with their hands out don't seem to ever really better their lives even after 30 some years and refuse change the way they think.

Boy, if Jesse Jackson ever did solve the problems facing some Americans of darker skin tone he'd be out of a job.  Thank goodness he's already fleeced America for more than enough money to live out the rest of his life when that actually happens.

We have not heard the last of the those that attempted to turn the World Trade Center into a crater.  The time will come in the future when they will strike us again and we will feel the pain of it if we fail to act.

1995

How are modern liberals like pigeons?  Often times they are homeless and smell bad.  If you give them a handout of something they desire they flock to you in droves, make some noise and hang around at your feet begging for more.  Not one of them will ever give you anything in return or thank you.  If you do something they don't like or scare them they cause a big flap.    If a larger, smarter bird moves in and attacks them they immediately find somewhere else to go and cause problems.  They often travel in large groups wandering aimlessly and getting in your way without a care for any inconvenience they cause.  They crap all over you if the desire strikes them and without hesitation.

Socialism works as long as you kill all the capitalists, don't mind living in poverty, and never complain loud enough for the government to hear you.

1996

Diplomacy is often a lot like masturbation.  Sure you feel good afterwards but now you have a new mess to clean up.

We are a nation founded under God.  But we are also a nation that realizes the advantage of freedom of religion.  We do not force a religion upon are people.  That being said however we are still one nation under God.

1997

If a homeless man wearing a sign that says "Will work for food." denies a job opportunity you offer him should we through him in jail for false advertising?  On second thought he would probably like that.  I mean 3 meals a day, a roof over his head and free clothes.

Politicians often talk about what they would do to solve our problems.  But then I always did wonder what they would do if they actually managed to solve all our problems.  I mean if they did solve all our problems then they would be out of a job.  That's not too smart.  Then I realized that politicians are our problem that needs to be solved the most. 

The problem with Communists and Socialists is that most of them don't know that they are Communists and Socialists.  They think they are compassionate, which makes arguing with them more difficult than getting a cat to move when he doesn't want to.

1998

Some people wonder why I think that we should lock up all the criminals and keep them there.  It's simple really.  If you lock up all the criminals then they are not on the streets to ruin the liberties of us law abiding Americans.  That is except for those criminals that we don't know about yet because they have not committed any crimes.  Since we can't know about the criminals that have yet to act upon their intentions except through sheer luck or their own stupidity then that is something we have to live with.  However to continually release and re-release offenders and repeat offenders and endanger the well being of our citizenry is an idea only the most compassionate could even desire.  I for one do not think it is at all intelligent or even compassionate to knowingly increase the number of criminals that roam our streets.  I have no compassion for criminals.  I do have compassion for the law abiding citizens of this country.  Thus keep them locked up and forget about the key.

Politician?  Isn't that from the ancient Roman word politicus which loosely translates to mean the desire to ram a large, unlubricated pole into another human being 's rectum?

How are politicians like my auto mechanic?  First of all they like to talk in words that they don't think you understand.  When you show that you do understand what they are saying they begin to make up words and other conditions that are not remotely possible in an attempt to confuse you.  After that they will point to the oil filter and call it the carburetor and if you correct them they will just continue on even as if they were right in the first place.  Then they will spend three hours under the hood.  And finally after I get my car back it still has the same problem it did when I brought it in and I am poorer for the result.

Government, even that which is by the popular consent of the people, seeks to control.  It is the basic calling and function of government.

Some governments will try to pacify the people with enough freedom to soothe their appetite while continuing to repress the true nature of the human spirit.  These governments seek to provide enough so that the people are clothed and fed and have some approved comforts while continuing to administer the remainder of men's lives and provide enough for the people to keep them dependent upon government.  Their belief will be that keeping the people dependent upon them just enough will quell the desire of rebellion for if rebellion occurs they would surely loose that which government does provide.  Again such things fight against the natural will of men.

Any gathering of politicians I think should be renamed to "Prick Waving Contests".  I mean that's really what all the politicians do is wave their pricks about trying to feel more important than they really are.  "LOOK at me!  I've got a huge prick!  I am important!"  I just wish that they would stop fingering their pricks and start growing some balls.

The third world war will be fought over religion with religious fanatics leading the charge.

1999

Yeah, its true I would rather have a president that gets laid than one that doesn't.  That said I would expect it to be by his own wife and not some flighty intern and I would also prefer he didn't lie about it when he got caught with his little Billys all over a dress.

There is only one problem that I see with George Bush if he wins the election and that is that he is a moderate.

Christians often spend more time arguing amongst themselves as to what constitutes Christianity rather than actually following the teachings of Jesus.

2000

The first thing that you must do when a politician promises to give you something is grab on to your wallet for dear life because the money to pay for it has got to come from somewhere.

The whole fiasco in Florida can be summed up in one short phrase, "If you're loosing the game, change to rules."

The reason liberals pitched such a fit over Florida is because they can't believe for one second that the American people would not want them to be in charge of this country.  To them it is the most enormous mistake ever by the people and justifies any means necessary.

2002

Ok here is my imitation of every major Democrat in Congress.  Ahem:
"I am for a war in Iraq as long as Clinton is in charge."
"I am for a war in Iraq as long as the popular consensus is that we need to go there."
"I am for a war in Iraq as long as the UN approves our right to defend our sovereign nation."
"I am for a war in Iraq until we loose even a single soldier and even then I am still for it but not as strongly."
"I am for a war in Iraq as long as it lasts less than 3 months after which time Iraq should be self sufficient."
"I am for a a war in Iraq but I am deeply troubled that some of the evidence may not be accurate even though it never bothered me before this point that such a thing might be true."
"I was for the war in Iraq but since we haven't found WMDs they obviously don't exist even though every major country and the UN believed that they did."
"I am not for the war in Iraq because I am talking to an anti-war constituency of the party at this time."
"I am for the war in Iraq because I am talking to a veteran's group at this moment in time although I still have serious concerns about certain things."
"I am not for the war in Iraq because I am on foreign soil at this moment."
"I am for the war in Iraq because my poll numbers show that I should be."

Waiting for the enemy to strike at you at is not only tactically stupid, but also a good way to wind up dead.

2003

I always find it amazing how celebrities that can barely make a movie worth watching continue to throw their two cents in about anything they deem fit to speak about.  Actually, that doesn't really amaze me.  After all we have opinions.  What really amazes me is how they think that people automatically have to listen to them no matter how stupid they sound spouting off about their topic of choice and if for some reason you don't well clearly you are violating their 1st Amendment rights somehow.

As I said in '94, those that hit the World Trade Center twice will hit us again.   It is only a matter of time before such an event occurs.  I for one would rather we continue taking the fight to these people than to sit around and wait for them to sucker punch us again.

If Thomas Jefferson were alive today he would be calling for a revolution.