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Wineskin TX Member Posts: 725 (12/14/01 1:20:38 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Xena Xmas Song Parodies OK, we haven't done any song parodies for awhile..= ..so in the spirit of the holiday season, I'll start! I Saw Xena Kissing Gab-rielle (as sung by Aphrodite) I saw Xena kissing Gab-rielle Underneath the horse blanket last night. They didn't see me creep 'cross the camp to have a peep. They thought that I was shacked up With my boy-toy fast asleep Then I saw Xena tickle Gab-rielle Underneath her bodice snug and tight. Oh what a laugh it would have been If Lucy had only seen Xena kissing Gab-rielle last night. Happy holidays folks...and please contribute to the songlist!
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2383 (12/15/01 9:09:31 am)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2384 (12/15/01 9:15:16 am)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies WP is Coming to Town You better watch out You sure better ride It’s beyond doubt your hide‘ll be fried WP is coming to town She’s sharpnin’ her sword She’s honing it twice Delivers one slice and puts you on ice WP is coming to town She sees you when you're pillaging She knows when you’ve been gross She’ll nail you as you zip your fly And in seconds you’ll be toast! O! You better watch out! You better ride hard Cover your ears She’s bringin’ her Bard! Gabrielle is coming along Gab’s scribing a scroll That lists all your faults Gonna describe all hits and assaults Gabrielle is coming along You can’t get away By Xena you’re pinned Watchin’ you squirm at Gab’s second wind Gabrielle is coming along She’ll blab til you are screaming All day til it’s pitch black She’ll drive you outta your mind with talk 'Til you beg for Xena’s chak! So! You better watch out! You better atone Lest you endure Her mind numbing drone Gabrielle is coming along At first you’ll think they want you They’re sneaky in that way You can’t believe you’ve scored such babes 'Til you find out they are gay! Ouch! You better watch out! You better make peace Don’t stick around Get yer ass outta Greece WP is coming to town. edit typo Ed= ited by: soulsisters at: 12/15/01 11:05:07 am=
ROCies TX New Member Posts: 57 (12/15/01 12:13:01 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xe= na Xmas Song Parodies GREAT, both of you !!! ROCies
Runt TX Member Posts: 479 (12/15/01 12:38:41 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Darn you SS and Wine, for dragging me into this! The Post-FIN Christmas Carols (To the tune of "We Wish you a Merry Christmas") We wish you a headless Christmas We wish you a headless Christmas We wish you a headless Christmas And a Jappa New Year Sharp arrows we spring at your exposed skin we wish you a headless Christmas and Jappa New Year (To the tune of "Frosty the Snowman") Yo-doshi the blowman was a fiery nasty ghost with bad makeup and a worse toupee if he blows one then your'e toast Yo-doshi the blowman was a fairytale we pray with a script so bad it would drive you mad we just wish he'd go away (To the tune of "Go Tell It on The Mountian") Go get me water from the Fountain while I'm lying here like a sack of air bring me water from the Fountain cause when you kiss me it toots my horn (To the tune of "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire" Akickme scheming by the open fire Akickme lying through her nose Background story being told by a liar While parading in her sleek kimono Everybody knows this turkey and her little toes help to make the Finale blight Xena fans, with their eyes bugging out will find it hard to sleep tonight They know Akcickme's gonna play "Oh Xena won't you come here and save the day?" and every plot device is gonna try to make this sorry story somehow fly And so I'm offering this simple phrase to Xenites from one to ninety-two Although it's been said many times, many ways Cut the cord, that's it, the show is through (Runt runs from the room ducking as popcorn is hurled her way)
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2386 (12/15/01 12:51:15 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies But, Runt!!!! Surely, you knew this was coming!!??= You could smell it in the air! Think of it as the beginning of a beautiful new (parody) relationship.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2389 (12/15/01 2:03:43 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Warlords roasting on an open fire Callisto’s clearly back in town Amazon gals being strung o’er a pyre Shows Callie’s just beginning to get down Everybody knows some mayhem spiced with cruelty Helps to fill our Cal with glee Wreaking havoc with her eyes all aglow She knows that this much fun cannot be free She knows that Xena’s on her way She’s got Gab in crushed red velvet on display And every scumbag troop Cal’s trained so hard Is goin' AWOL just to get next to the Bard And so I'm offering this simple rule To warlords from Corinth, Gaul and Thrace If you wanna play a scam, stealing other warlords land Make sure you have The Gab in place. Ed= ited by: soulsisters at: 12/20/01 3:16:57 pm<= /o:p>
LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2814 (12/15/01 2:15:38 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies = LADYKATE A= RES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2391 (12/15/01 2:17:39 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies I've been waiting for you LK. Wanted to leave Ares to the expert.
LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2815 (12/15/01 2:19:44 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies ss -- I'm drawing a blank. Not very good at verse parodies I'm afraid. So, Ares is all yours... but ONLY for the purposes of this thread, mind you= ! LADYKATE A= RES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH
Melosa1 TX Member Posts: 314 (12/15/01 5:29:11 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies OMG!!! YA'LL ARE FUNNY!!!! RITFLMAO (oh, help!! I can't breath) -Melsy
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 726 (12/15/01 10:35:39 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Alright! Just like old times! ROTFLMAO @ Soul & Runt, LOL!
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 727 (12/15/01 11:13:22 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Horace The Wet Nosed Doggy Horace, the wet nosed doggy had a thing for Ares’ leg. So when he came and sniffed it, he would whine and start to beg. All of the other doggies used to bark and call him “Mutt” , They never let poor Horace sniff another doggy’s butt. Then one lonely Solstice Eve, Ares came to say: "Horace, with your tongue so nice , won't you lick my face tonight?" Then how the war god loved him as he shouted out “Whoo Hooo! "Horace, you wet-nosed doggy, Xena never kissed like yoooooooooou." Ed= ited by: Wineskin at: 12/15/01 11= :35:36 pm
LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2833 (12/16/01 12:39:29 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Wineskin! That was great! LADYKATE A= RES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2392 (12/16/01 8:21:50 am)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Well producing this show was frightful Once the fans turned so damn spiteful It was just a dumb tv show Let it go, let it go, let it go It doesn't show signs of stopping The message boards are really hopping As long as we keep laid low Let ‘em go, let ‘em go, let ‘em go. Now the vision began to drift In the middle of the third season Rift And despite the irreversible row It made us a whole lotta dough! Since Xena we so adored Lopped her head off with a samurai sword To the fans it was our reward Cut the cord, cut the cord, cut the cord!
Runt TX Member Posts: 481 (12/16/01 9:07:58 am)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Soul-An, you and your mighty Covington hat have now produced a n= ew classic. ROFL over here...and Wine, four paws up for your Horace Chorus= !
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2393 (12/16/01 10:20:54 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Alas, Runt...my cherished CovHat was last seen launching in a combustible ball from my addled head, in the lobby of the Xenite Xiggurat Hotel and Casino....never to be seen again. <sniff> (Do you think you can do 12 Days of Xmas?? I fear I don't have the energy.... )
ROCies TX New Member Posts: 66 (12/16/01 5:33:10 pm)<= /span> Reply	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies OK, here goes : Hot tubbin' night The water's all right Xena dives in Shows us some skin Darned now Gabby is turning her back Scrubbin' each other, they're on the right track Great now the camera zooms i-in ... "Cut! Take it from the begin!" Sigh ROCies
BardKC TX Member Posts: 747 (12/16/01 6:20:09 pm)<= /span> Reply	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Soulsisters wrote: *Quote:* (Do you think you can do 12 Days of Xmas?? I fear I don't have the energy.... ) Ok this is The 12 days of X-mas Gabby style................. I came up with the first five........................I'm too tired to finish it so pitch in and finish it! On the first day of X-mas Xena gave to Gab ......A brand new BGSB On the second day of X-mas Xena gave to Gab.....2 Sappho tickets On the third day of X-mas Xena gave to Gab........ 3 writing quills On the fourth day of X-mas Xena gave to Gab........4 rolls of parchment= On the fifth day of x-mas Xena gave to Gab ......5 Golden Sais "Ha! It's not like your breasts aren't danger= ous enough." ~ Gabrielle Ed= ited by: BardKC at: 12/17/01 7:54= :28 am
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 728 (12/16/01 7:56:50 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies O Valkyrie O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie Your wonder bra is straining. O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie You are so hot you’re flaming. In Gabby’s presence you will drool, She cuts you off---you are the fool. O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie Your love life needs explaining. O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie Your flying horse goes swooping O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie Look out below! He’s pooping. Grinhilda is Odin’s delight And Gab wants Xena every night O Valkyrie, O Valkyrie Get a life…go cruising.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2398 (12/16/01 8:50:16 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Winey's on a roll!

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LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2853 (12/16/01 8:53:41 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Wineskin & Soulsisters ... great stuff! LAD= YKATE <= span style=3D'mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt'>ARES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 729 (12/16/01 8:58:38 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies I’m Getting Nuttin’ For Solstice Broke a promise and now I’m dead; Somebody snitched on me. I hid an eel in Gabby's bed; Somebody snitched on me. I spilled blood for Akemi’s sake; I made Lao Ma eat a steak; Killed my Gabby by mistake; Somebody snitched on me. CHORUS: Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Solstice Ares and Gabby are mad. I'm gettin' nuttin' for Soltice 'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad. I won't be seeing Hercules; Somebody snitched on me. He won't come visit me because Somebody snitched on me. Next year I'll be coming out; Gabby really will freak-out I'd start now, but Rob would pout; Somebody snitched on me. So you better be good whatever you do 'Cause if you're bad, I'm warning you, You'll get nuttin' for Solstice. Ed= ited by: Wineskin at: 12/16/01 9:= 01:57 pm
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 730 (12/16/01 9:21:11 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Japa-hell Wok Japa-hell, Japa-hell, Japa-hell wok Japa-hell swigs on Singapore Slings Gorging and barfing up bushels of rice How the Japa-hell can entice! Japa-hell, Japa-hell, Japa-hell wok Japa-hell slime, revenge on their mind Samurai heads served in red Tupperware In the fiery air. During dead time, it's the right time To nosh the night away Japa-hell time is a swell time To eat sushi as it crawls away Gobble-up skewered horse, nibble pig’s feet Stir-fry around the clock Mix and a-mingle your veggies with meat That's the Japa-hell, That's the Japa-hell, That's the Japa-hell wok.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2400 (12/16/01 10:02:06 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Wine!!! OH MY GAWD!
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2401 (12/16/01 10:04:40 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies It's beginning to look a lot like Jappa Ev'rywhere you go; Catch a glimpse of Ghost Killer and Ken, Higuchi on fire again With bamboo shacks and townsfolk all aglow. It's beginning to look a lot like Jappa, Tea whores for you to (c)all But the lamest sight you’ll see is Yodoshi appearing to be crashing through your wall. A bard with blue eyes wearing double-edged sais Is the aim of Akemi’s tatoo; Fans that will pay and then go away Is the hope of the cast and the crew; And Oxygen can hardly wait when reruns start anew. It's beginning to look a lot like Jappa Ev'rywhere you go; Xena’s leg’s in the forest dell, one in the swamp as well, = Where her head ended up we’ll never really know It's beginning to look a lot like Jappa; Gab has lost her fight And the thing that will wrench your heart is watching the Bard depart,<= br> Screaming, “That’s Not Right!”
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 732 (12/17/01 11:38:59 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Brava Soul! Brava! LOL! That was FINtastic!
Ellensboat TX Member Posts: 530 (12/17/01 9:26:54 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Shoulda known could count on you guys for a good l= augh! You are so good!
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2417 (12/19/01 1:34:13 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Akemi schemes and conspires while X&G put out the fires They think they’re all done but the fun’s just begun Xena’s goin’ to ectoplasm land Katana shings are you listening? as it zings blood is glistening A terrible sight her head just took flight Xena’s gone to ectoplasm land Gone away is the warrior stick around….it gets gorier For Gab it gets darkest when she finds the carcasse Xena’s gone to ectoplasm land Chorus: In a pot the Gabster has her ashes she’ll pretend that Xena’s still around G says are you here now? X says nothing Sigh, I’ll try another day when you're in town Now Gab’s pissed she didn’t ash dump Akemi played her for a real chump Why did Xena pay the Higuchi way? Now she’s stuck in ectoplasm land
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 736 (12/19/01 2:18:20 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies oh soul, soul, soul....so witty....so funny....so = sick...I love it! LOL!
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 737 (12/19/01 5:36:44 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Hark! the Hairy Warlords Sing Hark! the hairy warlords sing, No more Xena and Ms Thing. She is dead and Gabby's wild, Ares didn't get his child. Xena, who we all despise, Joined Akemi with her lies; Shot with arrows with good aim, Had her head cut from her frame. Hark! the hairy warlords sing, We can do our warlord thing. Xena, who Ares adored, Has to also cut the cord. Comforted by girls for sale, While he swills a sea of ale. Sexy war god needs relief! He wears boxers; should wear briefs. His depression starts to swell. He needs Xe to ring his bell! Hark! the hairy warlords sing, Ares needs a good wonking. Hail, O Gab our new princess! Hail the Babe of righteousness! Light and life to all she brings, Now she's into killing things. When she laid her scroll aside, Learned to fight so more can die, Born to write plays by the sea, Now she fights like ole dead Xe. Hark! the hairy warlords sing, We've got Gab to do our thing.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2421 (12/19/01 6:21:38 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies LadyKate is gonna love that one, Winey!! Excellent!
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 742 (12/20/01 3:10:15 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Maintext It's beginning to look a lot like Maintext If you're in the know; Take a look in the ole hot tub, and watch what is being scrubbed And ask yourself why Gabby has a glow. It's beginning to look a lot like Maintext, Boys ain't gonna score. But the cutest sights to see…are between our X & G As they smooch once more. A pair of hot chicks and butts they can kick Is a thrill for Xenites as well. But let us see hugs and not smelly thugs And love between Janice and Mel; And you and I can hardly wait for Sappho's poem again. It's beginning to look a lot like Maintext For those who wish to see. There's the heavenly dance in hell, erotic looks as well And Ubers who will marry blissfully. It's beginning to look a lot like Maintext Love in every scene. And between them and me and you, we all know what they will do When they go off screen.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2426 (12/20/01 3:13:38 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies
IreneRenee TX Member Posts: 1116 (12/20/01 4:01:59 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire Runt, this is funny... You guys are sooo entertaining!
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 743 (12/20/01 5:36:57 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies [Dear Scroll Reader: Gabrielle tells us how she re= ally feels about Akemi.] You're a Slick One, Ms. Pinch You're a slick one, Ms. Pinch. 30 seconds can kill. You're as charming as your papa, You're teahouse smells of evil. Ms. Pinch. You're bad katana With its bloody sharp steel. You're a user, Ms. Pinch. Your poetry stinks. Your brain is full of chopsticks, You've got wasabe in your soul. Ms. Pinch. Xena shouldn't touch you, with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole. You're a vile one, Ms. Pinch. You have agendas in your claws. You have all the tender sweetness Of a harpy in menopause. Ms. Pinch. Given the choice between the two of you I'd take the hormonal harpy. You're a foul one, Ms. Pinch. You're a nasty, pasty, punk. Your heart is full of dragon poo Your soul is full of gunk. Ms. Pinch. The three words that best describe you, are, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk." You're a liar, Ms. Pinch. You're the queen of selfish plots. Your heart holds dead dryad snot With moldy green spots, Ms. Pinch. Your soul is a Hades cesspool overflowing with the most odiferous assortment of defecations imaginable, stir-fried like you like it. You nauseate me, Ms. Pinch. Like a projectile super-puke. You're a chop-socky jerk jockey And you took Xena from me. Ms. Pinch.
LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2914 (12/20/01 6:00:36 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Wine & Soul... you're on a roll! LAD= YKATE <= span style=3D'mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt'>ARES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2429 (12/20/01 6:46:04 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Said the Xena Shipper to the Subtextor Can’t you see what I see? Xena’s got it bad for the God of War Can’t you see what I see? How can you miss her nipple mangling kiss? Oh, it brings him to his knees every time Yeah, it brings him to his knees every time Then the Subber said “Oh, pulleeeze! Open your eyes!” Look! And see what I see. There’s something Xena likes much more than guys Look! And see what I see What Gab’s does in that pool You’d only miss if you’re a fool It’s as plain as the suds in the tub It’s as plain as the suds in the tub The Fencesitter warned the Subbers and the Ships, listen to what I say Xena’s omnisexual per the scripts listen to what I say She’s hot, she’s cold It’s getting really old Let’s all find a new series to view I hear Witchblade is obfuscating too! Ed= ited by: soulsisters at: 12/21/01 7:19:09 am<= /o:p>
IreneRenee TX Member Posts: 1122 (12/20/01 8:55:27 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Oh My... take your writings to the conventions!!! Grinch and Do You Hear What I Hear? Irene
Runt TX Member Posts: 486 (12/20/01 10:03:53 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Wine and SS, I am laughing so hard I may need CPR.= ....
LadyKate63 TX Member Posts: 2918 (12/20/01 10:06:21 pm)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Soulsisters, that last one was a classic! LAD= YKATE <= span style=3D'mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt'>ARES' PR REP HERE ON EARTH

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Wineskin TX Member Posts: 744 (12/20/01 10:20:09 pm)=	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Sway Ride Just hear that armor jingle-ing And breast plates tingle-ing too. Come on, it's lovely weather To put on some leather with you. Outside my straps are falling And friends are saying "Whoo Hoo." Come on, it's lovely weather To put on some leather with you. Giddy-yap giddy-yap giddy-yap let's go... Let’s jump on Argo. We're riding and we’re clueless where to go. Giddy-yap giddy-yap giddy-yap it's fab, Just gripping your abs. I’m holding you just like the Gab ‘cept she doesn’t have half the flab. Butt cheeks are sore and rosy And hot and toasty are we. We're snuggled up together like two Chicks in leather would be. Let's go to Arboria Like Gab and Xena would do. Come on, it's lovely weather To put on some leather with you. There's a party at the Amazon’s, let’ go today. We can drink all of their booze and never have to pay. We'll be singing the songs we love to sing without wearing a top. At the bonfire while we watch their eyeballs pop... Pop! Pop! Pop! There's a dizzy feeling and you really want to die. Then you pass out from the mulled wine and the Old Red Eye. You will barf it up while your head explodes… and you just want to cry. These asinine things are the things We remember all through our lives. Repeat chorus and pass out, lol.
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2430 (12/20/01 10:24:22 pm) Reply	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies A mild beware for the under 18 . . . SLAY RIDE, aka, Christmas on the Steppes with Xena and Borias . . . . . Just hear that harness jingle-ing Ring ting tingle-ing too Xeeeeeenaahh! it's lovely weather for Palomino schtumping with you I pitched your snot-nosed kid outside, your wifey’s calling "You Hoo" Come on, I’d blow this joint For some slap and tickle with you Giddy-yap giddy-yap giddy-yap let's go Love that thing that you do! Tell me did the earth move for you too? Giddy-yap giddy-yap giddy-yap let’s strip, get down and let rip We'll take a hit off the bong where the hell did I put that whip? Our cheeks are nice and rosy ! And comfy cozy are we We're snuggled up together like two Warlords dressed in leather would be Let's take the road before us And torch a city or two Come on, it's lovely weather For world extermination with you There’ll be crucifixions here and there along the way It'll be the perfect ending of a perfect day We'll be spiking the heads we love to spike without a single stop! At the bonfire while we watch their eyeballs Pop! Pop! Pop! Just hear that harness jingle-ing Ring ting tingle-ing too Borias, I’m just not happy planning mass genocide without you &= nbsp; &= nbsp;
Creator of Xena Warrior Pot <= img border=3D0 width=3D10 height=3D10 src=3D"XenaXmasSongParodies_files/ima= ge010.gif" v:shapes=3D"_x0000_i1138"> TX New Member Posts: 23 (12/20/01 10:25:20 pm)=	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Have a hot= ty potty Solstace, It's the best time of the year. We won't know if pots will glow But have a pot of cheer Have a hotty potty Solstace, And when you walk down the street, Say hello to pots who glow And everyone you meet. Higher higher, the funeral pyre, Toasty as you see; They'll warm you when you're standing near Save her head for me! Have a hotty potty Solstace And in case you didn't hear Oh by golly have a hotty potty Solstace this year! (Sincere apologies to the memory of Burl Ives)
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 748 (12/21/01 8:43:51 am) Reply	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies To Virgil: Josef's roasting on an open fire; Brains are leaking out his nose. Eyeballs pop when his head starts to glow… Why Virgil watches, no one knows. Everybody knows, some rib meat and a toasted toe Helps to make the feast so right. I know its been said, cannibals eat the dead… Many crisp ones to chew. We know that Xena's on her way. She's bringing lots of skills to kill them all today. And every cannibal is gonna die When Xena shows them how her chakram can really fly. And so I'm offering this simple meal For ghouls from 1 to 92. Just ventilate the head when you batter your dead! Many crisp ones to cheeeeewwww!
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 749 (12/21/01 10:38:23 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Joxer Got Run Over By A Centaur Joxer got run over by a Centaur On his way to pee-pee at the bar. You can say there's no such things as Centaurs, But as for Meg and Virgil, they believe. He'd been drinkin' too much egg-grog, And he really had to go. But he couldn't find the outhouse, So he stumbled out to pee into the snow. When they found him the next mornin', At the scene of the attack. There were hoof prints on his forehead, And yellow stains appeared upon his slacks.. Joxer got run over by a centaur, Staggering to find a place to pee.. Some say Joxer's brain is really stupid But as for Meg and Virgil, they believe. Now we're all so proud of Virgil, He's been takin' this so well. See him in there watchin' skinflicks, Drinkin' beer and playin' cards with Gabrielle. It's not Solstice without Joxer. All the family's dressed in tan. And we just can't help but wonder: Should we use his armor as a pizza pan? Joxer got run over by a Centaur On his way to pee-pee at the bar. You can say there's no such things as Centaurs, But as for Meg and Virgil, they believe. Now the henbane's on the table That's the stuff that we like best. And a swig of this concoction, Would have put some manly hair on Joxer's chest. I've warned all my friends and neighbours. Better watch out for your health." They should never give a license, To a Centaur having booze upon his breath . Joxer got run over by a centaur, Staggering to find a place to pee.. Some say Joxer's brain is really stupid But as for Meg and Virgil, they believe. =
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 750 (12/21/01 11:15:37 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod [as sung by Xena's spirit to Gab] Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod No spears or arrows, ayi! puhleeze, me bod Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod Puh-leeze, Not Me Bod No spears or arrows..ayi!, puhleeze, me bod I really miss you, I'm very kiss-less I wanna kiss you, I'm so bored sh*t-less I wanna ______ you, until you're sense-less From the bottom of my heart.
Wineskin TX Member Posts: 751 (12/21/01 11:51:42 am)= Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies This is it folks, I am finally tapped out! Now sho= w me the way to the beer tap.... Should old-and-quaint-tapes be forgot And never brought to mind? Should old-and-quaint-tapes be forgot, Or should I hit Rewind? CHORUS: For old time's sake, my dear, For all of my dang time. I'll take the good eps with the bad, And love them for all time. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!
soulsisters TX Member Posts: 2454 (12/23/01 1:22:54 pm)<= /span> Reply =	Re: Xena Xmas Song Parodies = This is it - I'm tapped! Happy Holidays to all the Xenites! Hanging around with Gab and Xe On a crucifix in snow It’s quite a breeze, they’re gonna freeze Where it’s 5 degrees below Hanging around with Gab and Xe They have died ten times before And before the series ends they’ll die fifteen times more Hanging around with Gab and Xe While Michael takes his time Where did they find this pretty boy his acting is a crime Hanging around with Gab and Xe Gab’s in Heaven, all is well Oops! Wait a sec, something's wrong! Xena's gone to Japa Hell