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That happens from sex at the wrong time
 However, the most juicy ZHorkina bajka, alas, not differing the person
 Modesty of a plot, it was remembered excellent. Translation(transfer) with great and mighty
 Abusive language. Further from the first person.
 
 Nachalo all roughly - sharp appenditsit... At the doctor. Business was at ocean,
 Other courts(vessels) in area are not present, up to the nearest port three days to a course. Dock called
 Not Jury Senkevich so to itself(himself) it(he) could not make operation. All,
 Extinguish light and in a freezer. But medicine has largly carried, the captain has found
 Not ordinary decision. Has contacted the nearest oil platform, therefrom
 The helicopter has arrived(flied) and has thrown the doctor on following. So, from a platform on
 Platform, it(him) also have delivered to a table to Africa. Further - more. Was at us
 By the ship the unique woman, the barmaid, rather figuristaya, it is necessary
 To tell, and the beautiful woman. All ours zherebchiki radical, suffering
 Chronic spermootravleniem, it is constant to it(her) were driven. Especially
 The boatswain-Georgian tried. But so, for money, nobody gives, and all.
 And here, in day after evacuation of the doctor has taken at it(her) a back
 Capitally, to be unbent, poshevelnutsya. After a dinner a pain
 Has amplified, it(she) already howls, and eskulap has a rest under a coconut palm tree. Here
 The boatswain comes and offers gratuitously, that is, gift(for nothing), excellent(different)
 rastirku and the help in pridachu. Position desperate, the barmaid
 Accepts the first, but it is proud rejects the second and carries out
 Physiotherapeutic procedure itself. The boatswain as it has appeared, has registered
 The patient the checked up national means - turpentine. In the beginning all went
 Well. But then it(she), foolishly, has a little risen, strujka has run
 Downwards on a back and between polovinok has got... Well, has clearly put, there. A pain
 Intolerable, the burn is direct! What to do(make)!? Water?.. And suddenly, even worse?!... In
 poluobmorochnom a condition, it(she) ploughs up a window, turns,
 Excuse, back and exposes the suffered part of a body under freshening
 Pressure of a strong ocean wind. A picture, worthy Ayvazovsky's brushes.
 At this time on a deserted deck there is sladkoezhka a boatswain.
 Subsequently and it was not possible to establish(install) authentically, whether it is casual,
 Whether so has well counted(reckoned) all variants. It(he) silently drives to a flank under
 The window with magnificent installation, quickly jumps on it(her), and with
 To in total move... And there and then, during the moment of the fullest immersing and
 Desired anticipation suddenly occurs(happens) skleshchivanie. From a sharp pain and
 Fright the most gentle muscles of lady spazmiruyut and a steel vice clamp
 An outstanding part of a body of the superraised(superexcited) gentleman...
 
 ... As raspostranyayutsya hearings, the science does for certain not know. However very much
 Soon all in gathering, is not present only the watchman and the radio operator. Cost(stand) on a deck and
 baldeyut from scale of the certificate(act): it(she) - inside of a vessel, it(he) - outside. Similar,
 Sexually anxious boatswain has solved trakhnut all ship. Someone to
 To place recollects the well-known exception in English grammar: the ship
 - It(She). Someone modestly is interested, as this pose refers to. Opinions
 Miss: the person behind a board; a window to the Europe; Sezam, open.
 Exchange words for some reason whisper. Clearly, who is guilty. What to do(make)-
 Nobody knows. But the captain it(he) in all the captain. In full silence sounds
 Become winged a precise command(team):
 - The boatswain, it vaginizm the second type! For removal of a spasm enter a finger in
   Anus of Aurora Nikolavny!
 
 Seamen are shaken(amazed) by breadth of knowledge and riches of personal experience kepa, but on
 To public treasured a method has not worked. Not so all is simple in
 Interaction of floors, and manipulation is not omnipotent. The captain
 Critically examines not man-made monument of not taken place love.
 Calls up starmekha and orders to weld to a flank and to cut out ekstremalov.
 Starmekh, the grandfather on-флотски, reports, that it is impossible to cut out in any way. In
 Epicentre of events there is a problem. Diameter of a window of time in three less
 That maiden kormy, that botsmanskogo a paunch, also they have clamped it(him) densely.
 Autogenous cutting, welding promezh people without fatal uvechy to not pass(not take place).
 Then the captain considerably suggests to cut out people together with a wall.
 The grandfather, having explained, that such piece of a superstructure should be lifted the crane,
 Is interested, on what lovers thus will hang? On botsmanskom
 Anchor? It first. And, secondly, what for a wall to cut out in general? Time
 Between bodies to cut it is impossible, means, the complete set will include also the third superfluous-
 Wall between them. And with it(her) they will not get anywhere. It is possible, the truth, all
 The complete set, including an operating(a working) window-членопровод, on external
 To suspension bracket of the helicopter to Africa to send. A composition " Friendship of people " in
 Original export make, panymaesh. The captain, having imagined
 The pleasure of a yellow press of black continent, cuts:
 - So, an anchor to cut?
 The grandfather has not had time to answer. As is known, a life - the unsurpassed novelist.
 The come running chief of radio station shouts, that is received storm
 The prevention(warning). To the sea hedgehog it is clear, that after a tropical storm from
 The boatswain there will be only a certain particle, and that on responsible(crucial)
 Storage at partnershi. The new coil of escalation of intensity urges on
 The captain. It(he), resolutely having rejected technogenic and having assumed as a basis
 The natural variant of the decision of a problem, flies up in a radio cabin. Though in
 One has carried - till rigidly appointed(nominated) time of communication(connection) with base remains
 5 minutes...
 
 ... Try to imagine the report of the captain on state of emergency. Have presented?
 Well. Now - reaction of shipping company. Not absolutely? And so, kep has kept within in
 15 minutes. Also the emergency organization through the dispatcher of base here has entered and
 The friend-muscovite of consultation of the capital star known
 Professors-sexopathologists. By virtue of a significant difference in time,
 The star had a rest. As all was done(made), as well as it is necessary, on protection,
 Conversation took place. The captain has given introduction then the professor has woken up
 Finally also has shown genuine interest to topologicheski unique
 To case. We shall not reproduce the report of data exchange between the pro
 And strongly advanced fan(amateur). It is important, that as a result the captain has understood
 A number(line) of positions. 1) Illness is a little bit above, than it(he) assumed,
 Namely, - in a brain of the barmaid. 2) warmly and caress can remove(take off) a spasm at
 Women and to release(exempt) the boatswain. 3) it is meant heat: warm
 Bath FOR BOTH with temperature not below 38 and not above 39 degrees of Celsius
 (Put itself on a place of the captain), REST for the patient (it at a storm
 Ahead and boatswain desperately torn will behind) and something, foggy
 Named by the professor the first-born factor. 4) the first-born factor (PF)-
 It is an odd mix of two components: friendly heat and sexual
 Excitation. 5) as the generator teploroda it is suitable the man,
 Possessing to two, basically, mutually exclusive qualities: the hypergood-natured person
 And the sexual maniac (but not the boatswain). 6) PF and the woman should be
 Are completely isolated from any external influences (including, and with
 The parties(sides) of the boatswain!). 7) primitive psychotherapy in the form of reproaches, sneers
 And threats it is categorically forbidden. 8) PF should any ways to find
 Individual approach to suffered to calm, divide(undresse) to its(her) mountain,
 To cause in it(her) interest, to like it(her), to give it(her) the and to get into it(her)
 To shower(soul) to distract its(her) gentle words, strong kisses, to warm caress and
 Etc. 9) Having achieved positive result to convince the woman that is necessary
 To make an effort, i.e. to strain muscles of an abdominal tension. It conducts to
 To relaxation tazovykh the muscles, being their antagonists. 10) if PF
 Will make all correctly, steel muscles will relax.
 
 The captain did not have a choice and time, but there was a talent of the generator of ideas and
 The organizer of weights. The unsoluble problem(task) has been solved quickly and
 netrivialno. Kep has explained starmekhu constructive ideas, quickly
 Having outlined expressive chertezhunki. The crew has like, work was argued,
 As never. Strange, but technical maintenance of the project of special problems
 Has not caused. Mechanics and mechanics with passion cut out from malokapitalnykh,
 As the grandfather, pereborok inside of the ship necessary preparations has expressed and
 Quickly cooked on a superstructure a deaf(an indistinct) protective casing around of the boatswain and it(him)
 Podium. The grandfather something muttered all time about reflection of impacts
 Waves and corners of an inclination broneplit, therefore nobody was surprised to similarity
 Final product with a tower of auxiliary calibre. A vessel with big
 Dark grey bronebashnej on a white superstructure and the Aurora, tselyashchejsya in it(her)
 Through a window, funnymen have there and then named "Cruiser" the Aurora ". Practical
 The grandfather is happy(enough): that there this invention will leave, still we shall look, but shame
 Have covered, and a body, besides, if che, anywhere will not get to. In a cabin
 Barmaids all was very simple technically, but the extremely complex(difficult) eticheski.
 Around of suffered, stood letter G (scale), have attached letter P three
 Walls, using as the fourth external wall of a cabin, and all
 Carefully zagermetizirovali. It(she) has appeared in high, above a window,
 Enough to a spacious rectangular bath. Then both of a vessel have made
 Informed, having cut out between them below a window the big aperture.
 The disposable two-chamber bath impudently piercing limits
has turned out 
 The ship. The external chamber has been executed in the form of strictly closed bay window,
 Internal it has been solved with ispolzvaniem the fashionable concept opened(open)
 Spaces. However, by virtue of obvious circumstances, reception of a bath
 It was necessary to accelerate and finish up to a storm. Therefore the boatswain in rate have entered
 In zero-condition: have given to drink vodka up to loss of consciousness, prinajtovali to skobam,
 Specially welded on a covering, have enclosed in a mouth boxing kapu, strong
 Have bandaged the bottom jaw to the top bandage around of all head,
 Have stuck a mouth a sticky tape. Have stretched sleeves from an engine room for
 Submissions and a fence of water, have established(installed) automatics: gauges of a water level and
 Temperatures, a temperature regulator. Have separately tightened an air sleeve for
 Compulsory ventilation botsmanskoj towers. About influence of trifles on a course
 To history it is written much. At a job involving all hands have absolutely forgotten about welded
 Flank. It has appeared, in it(her) there was an oil paint, and the fuse was not.
 Still has largly carried, that has not jerked at svarochnykh works. Fortunately,
 The grandfather personally supervised process, has guessed to check up, and to a flank
 Have reliably battened down. Similar, it was day of the boatswain - all has earned with
 Half-kick. And here, at last, all is ready: the combined bath-бронебашня
 The temperature of water 38,5, automatics
are filled by water up to a demanded level, 
 Works normally. Everyone leave(abandon) a cabin of the barmaid.
 
 Problems have arisen with maintenance of the project with the staff. Persons,
 sotvetstvuyushchej to description PF, in a command(team) was not. The plan of the captain consisted in
 Volume to distinguish(recognize) in someone suitable deposits(inclinations) and a powerful impulse
 Personal influence and correct motivation to make active them on
 Some time. Having considered(examined) some nominees, the captain has made
 Hard, extremely responsible(crucial) choice. The sixth feeling prompted, that
 The radioman can play role PF, and it(he) was solved. All time, while
 There was an installation and starting-up and adjustment works, the captain used for emergency
 Psychological preparation of the shaken(amazed) radio operator. It reminded
a little 
 Instructing before meditsitsinskoj procedure, most of all it resembled on
 Large prospecting operation with recruitment of an agency and the subsequent
 Dangerous game.
 
 But here the critical moment of operation has come: the main designer has brought PF
 To a door, for which - novel. According to instructions(indications)
 Professors, only one person there can enter. In the strange image
 Start PF in a cabin has reminded start of the first cosmonaut in space. So,
 The door for PF is closed. That occurs(happens) behind the closed door, it is not known.
 Reaction on PF the woman who are being deep stress, is unpredictable.
 Now all depends on correctness of a choice of the captain and personal charisma PF.
 It is intolerable long minutes last. In burdensome expectation passes(takes place) nearby
 poluchasa as suddenly, among expecting there is a hysterical revival-
 The information on the underground group operated(worked) in
has somehow emerged 
 To cabin during installation. Brave underground workers fed already flown into a rage
 To the barmaid of a tablet but-шпа, achieving spazmoliticheskogo effect in
 Known place. During other time it(him) would fly on the first, but here
 Had no time for that. At last, all have calmed down, and time again was pulled.
 Uncertainty - a terrible thing. Especially, in a black box...
 
 Truly, knowledge - force. Recommendations of the professor have appeared absolutely
 Correct. PF has excellent executed a task in view and otstykoval from
 The ship botsmansky the module. PF, the barmaid have told nobody, how
 It has occured(happened).
 
 Captain's intelligence, will power and skill to work with people in current
 One flight two human lives have rescueed(saved). Anyway, one life
 And the same body. As well as it is necessary, as a result the captain has received
 Strict reprimand with entering. For amoral behaviour in the perverted form. After those
 Events, contrary to naval tradition for eyes to name the captain the daddy,
 kepa have nicknamed the grandfather. If to be exact, - grandfather Mazaem.
 
 In half a year, already on the ground, on wedding of the Aurora and PF, children(guys) in last
 Time have tried to find out at the tipsy groom of a detail, but it(he), as
 Always, has left from the answer and has become isolated. Then has slowly looked round warm
 The company also has told:
 - Mudaki all of you. Think, to the woman kh ** it is necessary? A horse-radish to you. Caress is necessary to it(her).
 
 In its(his) lips it has sounded a total categorical imperative: a horse-radish-
 To you, caress - to it(her). Much, vidat, the muzhik after that has rethought. Has kept silent
 Also has added:
 - Why í½*ñý always dry from water will leave, and if the woman decent(considerable),
   That is obligatory in something vlyapaetsya?

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