The woman at the wheel:))

THE BOOK OF SEXUAL REVELATIONS

(Alexey Vinogradov, the journalist, conducted ten years a marriage heading in the newspaper)

*... Has sold in a city apartment and has moved to live to parents in village. I live well, but mother lays in hospital in a city, and the father still goes. Itself I prepare-cook, all economy I pull, because is not present only in our and next villages of the woman 60 years, and me are younger than only 36 years. Smekaesh a situation? Suffered three months and was under a delusion on the neigbour. To it 62 years, but by the form - fighting. To It, can, and anything - it is pleasant, and it is opposite to me, but to climb all the same there is nobody. My "girlfriend" whispers, that here there will arrive her daughter, so with it and namusoljus. This daughter too it is a lot of years - for forty. Thick - on a photograph has not got. With goats and cows I am not able (the man, 36 years).

*... Has decided to check up feelings of one lover. It was on work from three, means, should return after midnight. I have winded houses a small rug and have put it near to myself - under a blanket. Has found old man's things - something remains from the father. Man's boots in a hall and trousers at a bed were top of my insidiousness. I have laid down near to this stuffed animal of the man and I look in shchelochku. Light did not extinguish. Ljubovnichek has come tipsy, has almost reached a bed and only then has noticed "contender". I thought, will beat a stuffed animal or loudly to use foul language. And it costs and cries - bitterly-bitterly. I have cast away a blanket from its part and I speak to it: "Well you?! In the same place a rug winded", - also I show it the needlework, and it all costs and cries. Has hardly calmed and has persuaded to lay down nearby. Probably, jealous men were translated and there were one crybabies (the woman, 28 years).

*... I wish to write about the case which has occurred to my girlfriend. Guys from its company like to give vent to hands. And here what way to scare away it has casually found them. Her parents - cynologists - work in the dog nursery. Somehow she has seen at them the American deodorant, which otvazhivaet dogs that did not stick. My girlfriend also has decided to test it on the familiar children. One of them just had a birthday. It has slightly sprayed the dress and has gone on a party. And all has turned out, as she wanted! All the evening long it concerned ' so to say ' strictly in a companionable way. The girlfriend has shared this "the confidential weapon" with the girl-friends ' and all it with success applied couple of weeks. And have then let out to children whom it is awful this news were delighted. After all guys suspected all this time, that at them something like a group impotence (the girl ' 21 year).

*... On winter clothes. Students of teacher's college most warmly put on - while all will remove, itself will sweat. They, it is visible, very much merznut at lectures. On the second place by quantity odezhek serving girls - warm shorts on a strong elastic band are obligatory, still there body stockings warm, wide trousers, in general, everything, that was at home. Most coldly put on diskotechnye little girls - only thin damp thread of shorts. And at all do not ask, whether there were we, cadets, the female linings ostensibly providing "pure breath". Nonsense, they there and then transform all liquid into this surprising gel which for some reason stinks old soldier's portjankami. Likely, these import linings also do from written off portjanok the American infantrymen who participated in operation "the Storm in desert" (guys, 19, 20, 20 and 20 years).

*... From far area there has arrived to me the man. We have got acquainted with it under the announcement. I will not begin to hide, that love affair at us has begun in two hours after its arrival. It was such ardent and is direct from a threshold has rushed to kiss me. I was indignant and discharged. But finally, it could flatter me. Have sat down to table. He does not look at vodka, and looks on my feet. I was delighted, that teetotal and so imperceptibly we have appeared on a sofa. Then - on a bed, then - on a floor, then in an armchair, then - on a kitchen table and on a loggia. I have counted for days of 18 times. To us and to talk there was no time. And when passions have ceased, has asked to tell it about itself. It has begun so: "I have stayed In prisons of 12 years...". And here I also have understood all (the woman, 37 years).

*... In the evening on August, 25th, 1977 I laid naked in hotel of the city of Belozerska and have been chained by handcuffs to a bed. To me then was only 23 years, and I was persuaded by my lover for a while to leave a city of Cherepovets and to spend with it couple of days in ancient Belozerske. Just for show me have arranged in four-seater number, and my friend has removed for itself separate lux in which our rough night has begun. Having tried everything, on what our Soviet imagination has sufficed, my beloved has suggested to chain me to a bed handcuffs. For this purpose it has specially borrowed them for a while at the brother-cop. I too saw at a cinema this film about the naked woman in handcuffs, therefore have gradually agreed. And when on my wrists steel bracelets were latched, I was excited before, that demanded from the man: "more and more..."

About my passion the hotel person on duty on a floor has heard and, certainly, was secured to expel. But my gentleman has presented to this woman a box with dry green Polish shades for rup fifty - and with happiness it with them has dried up, and has ceased to break our door... (Till now to tears it is a pity these shades, my lover went to Moscow and has bought two boxes: to one wife, and the second to me wished to present in Belozerske, but it was necessary to give to this belozerskoj to the fright). We have returned to love and when it has terminated (and condoms then seldom who dressed), I have asked to release me that bystrenko to escape in a shower - "to wash off children". He began to search on pockets for a key from handcuffs, and eyes at it with each minute all became larger. He has forgotten them on a little table in Cherepovets! With me there was a hysterics, that now I will not get to a shower and a physiognomy of the child from the married man. Two hours he absurdly tried to open handcuffs a wire slice. I roared and that import woman-victim in a foreign film about their bad customs coiled more loudly, than. To me torments became completely clear its moral and physically. I have asked zhenatika to cease to scratch it me a wire, to give me waters and to put on me clothes. He dressed me, as last stuffed animal on a collective-farm kitchen garden. All at random. Below still has normally dressed up, and above my captivated hands prevented to put on. I have asked, that he has called somebody from the personnel, it is necessary after all to get out me. And he was afraid for the reputation that will make the report, will reach work, will tell to his wife. Me frightened, that to both of us such amoral behaviour will solder and will print our caricatures in magazine "Crocodile". I it was afraid of all, and have asked then to find its saw and to saw a chain of handcuffs. He has suddenly declared, as handcuffs to spoil it is impossible, they bratovy, number, accountable. In the answer I as have shouted: " Drank, the reptile, I to write I want, release, I the candidate for party members! "He was frightened also has run somewhere at night to search for a saw. Comes back in half an hour and says, that is not present, even at restaurant asked.

In general, it began to saw handcuffs my nailfile for nails. In a picture was, round provincial hotel begins ordinary labour, and people wake up for a daily feat of arms. And in number of the Soviet hotel as in a foreign detective, the man saws a small nailfile for nails steel handcuffs on hands of the bared beauty. And I lay, yes so to write I want, that for a night pot this minute the Native land would sell. But then at the beloved in a toilet and under execution would not dare to descend. For three hours have sawn, my hands were released, I have quickly thrown with a jacket and was threw in a toilet. Has returned and cry, that we will do - I do not know. We have sawn a chain of handcuffs, but they remained on hands.

Has drunk for calmness a vodka wine-glass (muzhchinka I absolutely for fear has become limp) and took the initiative in the semifree hands. Has easy put on, has made toilet, cut summer sharfik and has wound bracelets on hands, and from above has thrown the sviterok. So we also have gone on the long-distance bus, normal people around scurried about, and at me at the sight of the militiaman on a back the nervous pleasant shiver as if I the young guerrilla-podpolshchitsa went in handcuffs on occupied by fascists Belozersku on javochnyj the bus has run... Here so I casually became the first sadomazohistkoj in a province (the woman, the age is not specified).

*... I waited twenty years orgazma, and it has come to me unexpectedly, on wild pjanke with my chief. Business was after collective celebrating of birthday. Have drunk a little, quickly all have dispersed, I was detained by the chief to find any papers. In the course of searches have got to talking, have added kofejku with cognac, then I have for some reason sprawled on a table. The woman I though also harmonous, but on a table has rumpled papers much. In the heat of our sexual sin, my chief has joked, that it should increase now to me the salary... During this moment I for the first time in a life have caught orgazm. It appears, it very much raises, when it is a little, though and for fun, you buy... The Salary to me also have really added, not for THIS adventure on a table - it is simple all the salary have increased. And when I with the lovely chief again informally meet on a table the most sweet minutes I elicit at it salary increase, he promises - during this moment I finish. Women, try, I urgently recommend this way of treatment of female frigidity (the woman, 37 years).

*... Two years ago I have decided to play a trick on the most younger brother to whom was then 6 years, and have enclosed it in video of the cartridge with animated cartoons the adult cartridge with an educational porno. I was closed in the room and have pretended, that I prepare for examinations. In a keyhole all was visible to me. My brother with the neighbour of the same age quickly have found the new cartridge with a beautiful label and have included it on viewing. It was something. They sat in front of the screen, having closed palms the person, and peeped through the spread wide fingers. Silently. They have seen it everything, have switched off and are silent. I was frightened, that with kiddies the shock and should be called doctors. But suddenly I has started talking: "When I will grow, I will never torment little girls". The second detsadovets has repeated this oath: "I will not marry in general, and that the wife will force me so on a sofa to skip". On this phrase I have frightened away them a loud laughter (the guy, 19 years).

*... Young women are not able to undress beautifully before the man. It seems to them, that in the beginning it is necessary to remove insignificant parts of clothes - sharfik, ornaments, a jacket, moreover and foolishly to wave with it, as in a striptease a bar. They think, that at this time the muzhik, having concealed breath, waits for an exposure of the most intimate places. Are mistaken, the man patiently waits, when to it will bother vymahivatsja with the rags, and it remains naked. And it is necessary not so. One movement simultaneously to remove a skirt, stockings and all that under them, and then to sit down on an edge of a bed and slowly and is lazy to start to remove an ear ring, ringlets. Believe, this minute you and will fill up (the woman, 28 years).

*... Somebody from girls jammed in the lift at two o'clock with two unfamiliar cadets who before it had strongly a drink beer? There was a hot May evening, and we with the girl-friend unexpectedly with these two zavisli between the fifth and sixth floors. In the beginning it was ridiculous, we have got acquainted and cheerfully helped children to shout for rescue. But cadets cried out somehow gloomily and somehow is doomed. And suddenly they have apologised and have hinted about the ambassador to a beer problem. We quick-witted little girls: have turned away and have begun to sniff in corners of a cabin of the lift. Judging by sounds reaching us, the technology was extremely simple. On a floor after all it is impossible we (will choke), therefore one cadet a little bit wrung out hard doors, and the second tried to get. And so the first has got, and they have changed over. The second too has started to get, but at a companion fingers have trembled, and it has casually released doors. You sometime heard, how in the May evening in the lift the cadet shouts? And as he thus jumps, as the lift terribly is unsteady, what uninteresting words are thus spoken. In general while wrung out doors, we with the girlfriend from laughter have slipped on a floor and slightly have not made pi-pi. Well, and the lift has earned minute through three after that awful shout which, probably, the mechanic on repair of lifts (the student, 19 and 19 years) has heard on other end of a city.

*... During Soviet time we were very illiterate in sex questions. I at school heard, that if during sex the man on the woman - will turn out the boy, and on the contrary lay - the girl will be born. At me the first the boy was born, and after how many I on the husband top did not sit - was born two more guys. To you it is ridiculous? And we in all it trusted.... Once, in 1975, the husband has brought home a condom. I was afraid of it, as the mouse or a rat. The husband was more skilled before marriage, he has insisted on protection and when it has entered into me with this sovok condom it there samosnjalsja and remained with us. And we, excuse for such love affair, the whole hour a spoon tried to get. Still it was necessary to inflate them before use, we have inflated one, and it has burst. In general, troubles with these means was much (the woman, 45 years).

*... Twenty years ago it was accepted to inflate condoms before use. And what fool has thought up the such? Who from a two should inflate, and who to laugh? At me to the man with nadutym a ball any sexual inclination personally vanished in a teeth. I last time have not sustained. And has told to the lover: "Well? Itself has inflated - itself and fly on it as a Winnie-the-Pooh behind honey" (the woman ' 49 years).

*... I have arrived to village. Skukota. Suddenly, I see, the local girl sits on a bench, type. I have approached to it, type will get acquainted. It, type, agrees. In nature we walk the whole month. And suddenly it to me, estimate, says, that the pregnant woman from me. And in a trance, on pjane behind a market brjaknul to marry to army. Here and oblomom me has covered, it is necessary in school as early as a year, and here with a belly in a back push. I to it, type speak, can not from me. She, as though does not understand. Has asked cousin bratana, he speaks, let she eats a nettle and the child will jump out. In general, is did not want, but I of type have roughly asked it, and she has eaten. For other day at it "red" days have come, type is free. I it so directly have asked not to go in marriage for me, she of type has understood, and so I had first my love (the guy, 17 years).

*... Distances on hundred roubles to the bathhouse attendant and spied two hours in a female bath. I to you will tell - the picture is worthy brushes poljaroida. Women do to themselves masks on all places, except soft and as fishermen each other show hands the sizes familiar man's personal belongings. Judging by gestures, all of them wives of elephants. But for decent figures in a bath you will not notice much, or the crack in a wall was too small, or that day there was a review tseljulita, and one housewives have come to a bath... What is to peep (for what hundred roubles to give it is not a pity), teperechnye intimate hairstyles. That they with the lohmudkami get up now: under kanatku cut, under a baize, under a siskin-pyzhika, entirely modelling hairstyles, curly one grannies (the man, 36 years) go.

*... In 1959 till two nights was the Snow Maiden, and after the little fool. "Has flown", as a cat. Put on then after all in rather warm sheepskin coats. Hot!!! Almost on a naked body dressed the Grandfather of the Frost: cowards, a cap, a beard and a sheepskin coat. And on the Snow Maiden there is less than clothes: a shirt, a cap and a fur coat. And business young... It is good, that the Grandfather the Frost has got the decent. Have got married, have lived forty years, before death asked to bury him in an old sheepskin coat of the Grandfather of the Frost. Have not obeyed, have buried as all - in a suit, and now each New year I sit one in old fur coat Snegurki and to crying (the woman, 60 years).

*... This love affair of my father, passed all war and come back to native village. Not all muzhiks have returned from war, and in collective farm worked in the majority of the woman. Time, after long work, my father and its friend has drunk with women of vodka and have foolishly set on them to wash in one bath. Two muzhiks and more than ten jadrenyh young women have jammed in a bath. Into light have blown, and at them the strong love has casually begun. Two muzhiks - with all. Could not understand any more, with what woman was, and with what else is not present. Well, the father is stronger this case told and smeshnej. As on siskam and to feet they defined in a bath of the women bypassed by them etc. it was a shame to all next day in eyes to look. Through the earth with shame it is possible to fail. But was also good. Many children, and from these children - still children were born then in this village. Today this village big. Not all young tepericha about this bath know (the man, 54 years).

... I have chosen to myself in the newspaper the suitable announcement with serious intentions. Has sent the letter with my phone, therefore invitations to wait it was necessary not for long. I do not know, why I have agreed to go on a visit to absolutely unfamiliar man. But so happens. It has opened a door not in a tuxedo and without a tie. It has calmed me, as I have gone on a visit dressed home-style. The man has appeared affable and very gallant. The table has been covered as it is necessary, and even in an one-litre jar three heeled gvozdichki. "Has carried" ' - I have thought and began to look round on the parties. An ordinary barchelor flat in which two hours back rag zalohmatili a floor and slightly sent on errands a dust on the rests of the polished furniture. The sight has fallen to a double bed. It here resulted many, I think, and for some reason straight it I ask about it. He somehow very confidently answers, that with women at it everything is all right ' all by ' all in azhure, etc. it was not pleasant To me, and I have frowned.

He has looked at my sour mug and what for began to tell about the victories over women even more. "In the childhood ' - speaks ' - I have started to be engaged in it since ten years..." "Maniac" ' - I outright was frightened, was pressed in an armchair and closed by a salad plate. By the way ' salad was anything. My gentleman already stopped to brag of the victories and began to say, that now it began to concern it in another way.

From it it "in another way" I was frightened to murashek, but a kind have decided not to submit. And conversation has passed in other channel. He told about the work, about the hobby for fishing ' has started talking about books. I have decided to support last conversation to be rubbed in trust to the tyrant ' somehow to gain it. He began to read me poems from any antique poetry, I have slightly narrowed eyes and askance looked at the opponent. I was disturbed very much by that circumstance ' that he for all evening has never looked at my feet ' and I was in not so long skirt ' and to the feet I knew the price for a long time (on sights of men in the street). All ' I think. My feet are not necessary to it also all the rest it is not necessary. He has sex "in another way": will cut to me a throat with an open razor and from it will receive the sexual satisfaction. And feet mine are not necessary to it ' a superfluous burden at a partition of a corpse.

I sit, and at me a palm damp ' under knees sweat flows. I already agree to change my strange maniac for any group rape - if only live to remain. But has decided not to surrender. Give ' I think ' it I will tempt, and then it will be a pity to it to cut me on pieces. Minutes three got up courage, has then rushed on it with embraces and has tumbled down on a sofa... It has calmed down under me and does not move. I have decided to fix this small victory a long French kiss ' thus have obviously overdone and have covered with its saliva. But he was silent and is guilty looked at me, and was then discharged, has risen and speaks:

- You understand ' Lena ' I three years the impotent man, therefore for me important spiritual dialogue with the woman ' its outlook.

- Ah you ' the maniac lime, the impotent man cranky. Here it what yours "in another way".

And on its muzzle ' on a muzzle ' on a muzzle. Has seized a jacket and has escaped. So I was rescued from paws of the sexual maniac (the woman, the age is not specified).

*... 26-year-old Andrey's family, 23-year-old Svetlana and their two-year-old daughter could not exist on 650 roubles a month any more. The young husband and the wife have decided to divorce and marry and marry rich partners that then with them to divorce and return with money from rich marriage formally. Finally, Andrey and Svetlana wished to create again then a family with each other. And here is how it has occurred actually. This thought has come it simultaneously behind habitual kitchen conversation. In the beginning for fun, then, laughing, they discussed small details and suddenly both have understood, that already speak about it seriously. Andrey has given announcements in some local newspapers and began to try to discover suitable offers itself. The first practical experiences have shown, that it is not necessary to decently dressed ladies and even is opposite. Have not helped and flowers bought on last money and the new suit bought on credit. To rich brides were for some reason necessary also richer husbands, and its youth and a nice physiognomy were necessary to nobody. Only once it managed to drag the well-founded lady in bed, for what she has allowed to come to it every week, and even has promised to help to be arranged for more paid work, but then about it has forgotten. Became then Andrey to try if not to marry on rich, to try to render paid intimate services to rich ladies. The guy it beautiful and with a quite good figure, but pornobusiness was not set. The first lady has given to it for a month of 200 roubles, and the second has for nothing infected with indecent illness. Medicines have managed much more expensively. Here then have decided to give out for the rich husband wife Svetlana. Marvellously, interested persons was much, but their financial position rich to name it was difficult. At last have found the suitable fifty years' man with apartment, car, a summer residence and the decent salary. He has agreed to take Svetlana in marriage together with the daughter and even was glad to the child. Andrey and Svetlana had to divorce. The whole year Svetlana has lived with the new husband in a full prosperity and secretly saw Andrey, persuading it all to stop and again to live together. Sometimes it saved from an economy of a few money and gave to their Andrey. He said, that saves them, and itself spent on drink from a grief the same day. Business has ended with that the old husband has learnt about a true state of affairs and has expelled Svetlana to the former first husband. Svetlana wished to bring an action against the rich spouse, but it have quickly dissuaded. Now Andrey and Svetlana again live together (the guy, 23 years).

*... In our district there is a youth ' engaged in amateur performances. Once, after plentiful vozlijany, to us in a head has come pochudit. We have dressed little girls in Russian national dresses and have decided to make love directly in this "masquerade" ' as our grandmothers and grandfathers. Well, I will tell to you ' in olden time this business or at all were not engaged ' or did it very sedately and delicately. To catch the little girl in such skirts ' certainly ' it is possible. Itself will get confused and will fall, but further... Without skills very difficult. We plaid about it publicly - us was four pairs. But not up to the end - we only simulated "zavalivanie". Have laughed in plenty. And the present student in jeans, we think, any medieval knight or the count in three raincoats violently to incline to love too could not. I have asked the grandmother on ancient pre-revolutionary underwear and have been disappointed. At poor it at all was not, and at bills of sale was so much, what even very patient man has given up as a bad job, and not having reached to delights of the kupchihi.

*... For April, first we have decided to play the director of our factory and have printed the comic order, that all working women of the enterprise who till June, 1st will not oversleep with the director, will be reduced or dismissed. Have palmed off on the chief this order together with all documents, it, on a habit not reading, has signed, and we have set the seal on this paper. On third of April we have hung out the order on a bulletin board, went around and tore tummies. And through days-two about the order have forgotten, and when workers in the middle of the month have come to office to receive the salary absolutely fifty years' grandmas (our working women) have casually come across this order, jokes they have not understood, have lifted shout about bespredel oligarchs and our factory oligarch, in particular. And it it almost in grandsons suits, they quite seriously refused to oversleep with it and were going to go to complain everywhere where only it is possible. In the beginning at them laughed and specially teased, and then hardly them have calmed, have hardly persuaded, that anybody them, fair truzhenits, to the pension will "not tear up", and that they will easy finish on the places. But they still for a long time shouted in a corridor, that the secretary of the director in four changes let is better works, and to touch fair women they will not allow (the woman, 33 years).

*... The adventure at me meanwhile is not present. But I wish to write an adventure of my girlfriend. Its boy such left, that last year mowed from army - to all duped on ears, that he the vegetarian, the pacifist and struggles for Lev Tolstoi doctrine. And itself about it has no concept. All has from what others have told picked up. The girlfriend to me on friendship admits time, that she waits from this boy of the child, but does not know, as its this guy again began to mow from army and has decided to change the floor (man's on female). Estimate, after all it cannot then to be a trick, and only. Conversations they conduct the such. It to it: if will not resolve operation on floor replacement, has decided to cut off to itself "krantik" the razor. It to it: without a member you all the same will take away in army, take, for example, in a construction battalion or on a submarine, where a member is not necessary (the girl it to do 18 years. And business is so: to it the husband, and to the future child the father.).

*... How to have sex in a bathroom? Pour on one third of water. Add shampoo, but not fat, differently your partner becomes sklizkoj, and you will lose it. Put nearby on a little table soft drinks, champagne, wine glasses, fruit. It is necessary to learn slowly, beautifully to undress, covering with a bast everything, that is not necessary. Has forgotten to tell the most important thing. In the beginning find such silly woman who will get for you into this narrow Soviet bath. To Make love it is possible only in the big import bath. If want, try and in the Soviet bath, but the one who will appear below, will necessarily sink (the man, 34 years).

*... I have got acquainted under the announcement with one guy and have decided to make for you interesting love affair, as well as promised. We have climbed with it in a bath, have typed water. Erotic games with soap at us have not turned out - soap has escaped under a bath. In oral sex under water divers let are engaged - it was not pleasant to us. That before usual sex in water, impression not so: you slide on a bath, as worm in a meat grinder. We only in a bath have brought down well foam - were as two stuffed animals in white cotton wool. But the sexual inclination undertook the, and at us the sacrament of love has begun. The guy that heated me the weight a stopper emerged on a surface. Close contact it was impossible. All squelched, creaked and champed. And at orgazme I on a habit have opened a mouth and instead of intimate sighs "a-a-a!!!" It has turned out banal "bul-bul" - as destruction of "Titanic" in a small puddle (the girl, 25 years).

*... Once whole student's group DND could not tear off the naked guy from the naked girl... For a long time, during Soviet time, I studied in the Vologda technical school, and all of us went to be on duty in a voluntary team at the next site of militia. Once from one of hostels phone call has arrived, that later time in a room of girls another's guys sit, drink and do not go to disperse. When we have five together approached, in a room have found only a two. The guy on a bed upoenno "loved" the girl, and we began to separate them. Five strong guys pulled one guy for hands, feet, a head and even for a soft place, but tear off from the girl could not. He has begged: "I Ask you as people, allow to terminate, and then I will surrender!!!" And we have given to it for this time (the man, 50 years).

*... We with the friend spied through a crack in a female bath. Had time to look at much as have suddenly met in a crack other, female eye. He looked in man's section of a bath. We have told to this eye, that in man's branch to look there is nothing. An eye scaredly vytarashchilsja and ulez. We have again decided to look, but there remained to wash only thick tetenki. They wash is uninteresting: backs rub each other and shout about the affairs.

Suddenly the harmonous fine girl with a huge bast comes into branch. This bast has closed everything, that we wished to peep. Such oblom! But we had time to be excited very much and long could not put on trousers (the guy, 22 years).

*... I will tell about a case with my former wife. In 1991 privalivaju late home - in "bobika drunk". The wife has taken pity and began to undress me, but has casually found in my pocket female shorts of one little girl from which we standing had sex at an entrance. The wife howl has lifted. I say, that I to it have brought these pants in a gift. It shouts, that they old. I sober and I explain: "Well, you dark at me. Same" sekond-hend "- the American sale for poor Russians. I on these pants with setochkoj have banged all salary. Carry, do not doubt". But these shorts to the wife to wear it was not necessary. It on them the same evening has found the Soviet label of the Moscow garment factory. Uselessly to it was to explain then, that it is Russian emigrants these noshenye, likely, have handed over pants in America. I remember, we a floor of year did not talk to the wife (the man, the age is not specified).

*... In our small settlement is what to tell at sex level. We have organised in settlement first two married couples ' which last year for the first time were engaged in group sex. It is sensation! There is at us an acquaintance - "blue". So the life in our settlement is in full swing. There is also a misunderstanding from local residents. In the summer my wife was kissed on the mouth with the lesbian-girlfriend on the area - before food shop. There was an evening ' but their long kiss shockingly has not been approved by three another's guys... We would like to be written off with the adherents from a city. The homosexual man for ours poselkovogo the acquaintance is very necessary. It always one ' is more in settlement "blue" it is not visible ' and its meetings happen always in holiday ' at the sea (a married couple ' 28 and 34 years).

*... I am am revolted with statements of women concerning that they do not accept the sizes of sexual advantages of their partners. After all not the size is important. Simply women are always dissatisfied with something, and the pohotlivost it to justify something it is necessary. I was convinced Of it. Once I have got acquainted with the woman for five years is more senior me. She all time complained: "Here at my husband small, thin". And when at us with it business has reached bed it has turned out hohma. It was necessary to me to bare the economy, as it with wild shout: "You to me there will tear all!" - has jumped and has quickly put on. So explain to me of the woman, that it is necessary for you: if in diameter of 3,5 sm you have not enough, and 6 sm - are a lot of? (The guy, 20 years).

*... Instead of the I will write you love affair of my father. In the fifties he has conceived to marry the first rural beauty ' which was not against it. But the father was not strong in sex questions. Some times was on pjanke - not that with women ' not that with cows. More shortly ' there has gone the father to a city behind experience in bludstve. Has arrived into place ' has bought in shop 0 ' 5 vodkas and blood sausage. Has credited and has gone to walk on streets. There also has got acquainted with the woman as in the beginning it seemed to it, bad behaviour. The father then was young and talkative. Began to start talking molodke a teeth. Also has started talking: it has led it to herself home. There my father for the first time in a life has seen a warm toilet bowl ' which has made upon it such impression ' that he has decided not to marry the first beauty of the village ' has not wanted to be more tractor operator-vympelistom and has wished to remain for ever with city toilet bowls. I do not know (the father does not speak) whether ' has learnt to its knowledge of sex moloduha ' which became then my mother ' but that toilet bowl in apartment of my parents is whole till now. Has turned yellow, has cracked, but still I cost. When I come to ancestors on a visit I sit down on it as on a patrimonial nest (the man ' 28 years).

*... You wrote ' that in one area there lives the little girl who under the grandmother's recipe prepares a love bewitching drink. They there already on flood sell it. The woman has approached to me at railway station and has suggested to buy a bottle of a bewitching potion for 20 roubles. I have given it money, but it has given me not a bottle, and small puzyrechek with this liquid. In a city we with the girlfriend in a hostel for laughter have given to drink the children from this vial! There was an effect? Yes! With tremendous night of love! It is a pity, that children should leave in the morning to themselves home. And they have gone, without any efforts having come off us. Probably ' the potion dose in a vial was small and it has sufficed at some o'clock (the girl ' 19 years).

*... At us in village Churovsky Sheksninsky area one little girl has welded on babkinomu to the recipe of a bewitching potion for my friend. He has drunk, and all oblevalsja on trousers and on a doormat. Privorot it cooked from dry mushrooms, can both mad, and grasses. Has told lies to my friend that is liquid chocolate and has forced to try all mug. This little girl is a lot of from itself imagines, and only what guy will look at it, she strongly falls in love. My best friend oblevalsja from privorota and, seeing it in the street, escapes with matjugami, but she does not understand and gets it (the guy, 16 years).

*... One girl did not have a love with one guy, and it has started it to ask not to leave from it. In general, it was humiliated before it. Threatened, that will commit suicide, if he does not want to walk with it. In general when they passed at station, it began to lay down on rails ' to be lost. The guy was frightened and began to drag it, but it has caught very much. By there passed my big brother with the friend ' it has not become puzzled and has told to that little girl, that when to it a train it will cut off a head, opisaetsja from a pain. The little girl did not begin to be dishonoured and has escaped (the girl ' 16 years).

*... It is time, I think, to organise the Russian bank of sperm and for future times to freeze spermatozoidy the best people of our country, for example, deputies. Not all, of course, and those who else can. Or to collect sperm on a party accessory. After all be at today's left parties spermatozoidy Pavlika the Frost or Pavlika Korchagina they could rejuvenate completely for twenty years the party numbers. However, an example with Pavlikami not absolutely successful. Judging by books, at younger Pavlika to take sperm would not be in time - he was killed by fists even before puberty, and at the senior would be late - at it on narrow-gauge railway building all already otmerzlo. But after all were at them and more sexual ideological idols, were after all at them CHapaev, or Petka, at the worst, and sailor Zheljaznjak - it is terrible to recollect. The present Schwarzenegger Oktjabrskoj of revolution (the man, 32 years).

*... For the constant client in a man's hall of a hairdressing salon it is necessary to struggle not only scissors and a hairbrush, but also to entice it something big. I have noticed, that lonely men come to us not only to be cut. It is pleasant to them, when we potter with their heads, we touch hands, we speak approving words. They do not have not enough simple female caress, here they and cut one short filament on 2 times a month... We entice constant clients and more sexual methods: I often concern the client sideways, hips, I will necessarily bend down over a head - let he will feel a breast of the lonely young beautician (I do not love this word). Last summer one client so from all it was got, that has unexpectedly kissed me on a naked navel from under an open T-shirt and has made my the proposal. Generally, us call in marriage almost each labour shift but as for the such you will go: at it except dandruff anything is not present (the beautician, the age is not specified).

*... To learn, whether the girl is pleasant to the guy, it is possible on a teeth. One of my old guys admitted, that when ran for me, constantly cleaned a teeth: suddenly it is necessary to kiss me. It since first day of our acquaintance became drait to a jaw on some times in day, and has kissed me for the first time only for the second month of our acquaintance. Its teeth, then he to me admitted, for this period even became more thin and to the touch began to resemble the polished handle from an umbrella. And you say, that caries is invincible. I now unmistakably define on a teeth, whether there is at this guy a girl or not. The decent girl should not get acquainted with the occupied guy with the polished teeth, and to search for the - lonely, with not chishchennymi.

*... Married men differ from single on cowards. Lonely men go on women in swimming trunks and remove them during the latest moment. ZHenatiki habitual gesture cowards together with trousers pull down. And they are engaged in love in another way, trying at once to seize everything, and then to stroke and consider, that to them has got. Bachelors, they on the fan: those on you creep, ask, a breast will praise, to your hip a compliment will give. And during sexual intercourse bachelors arise upon verbal encouragements from the woman, and zhenatiki wave away from such praises: a pier, then you will tell - you do not see, whether that, I stick out (the woman, 29 years).

*... I wish to tell to you one our family history. I married (in every respect). On a sort of the activity the husband often is absent in a city. I the woman attractive, many pay to me attention and even try to get acquainted. But, fortunately, on the warehouse of character I am an one-man woman. Simply I adore the husband. Therefore never I change. And here once on my birthday the husband has given me an amazing gift. He has presented to me the vibrator, i.e. an artificial member. In a day the husband has left, and I with curiosity have decided to try this igrushechku. It so was pleasant to me, that I even slept with it in obnimku. In three weeks there has arrived the husband. Having looked at me, he somehow has felt at once in me change. I to it not that that have grown cold, but any more there was no that sexual passion with what met him earlier. All forces have been given that, artificial. The husband even began to be jealous a little. I speak to it: "What for has bought then?" And it: " I did not think, that you such maniac ". The maniac not the maniac, and but on another's muzhiks I do not run. So a little bit also have sworn with it., Of course, it at me has not selected the vibrator. And, leaving, has again told:" Use with mind and me do not forget ". Here so! (The woman, 36 years).

*... Recently I have met the old girlfriend, we with it had an affair, when studied in "pede". We have left after it "has flown" and has elicited at me 200 roubles on underground abortion as she has told. But, having communicated in many years, I have understood, that it then was not the pregnant woman.... And that is why.... I have met her in 10 years, my feelings were updated, and I began to look after it. It not against. But we had general friends, and one friend to me has told, that it gets up now. This girlfriend converges with muzhiks, and with married too. Yes, probably, and not with one in a month. Time will pass, and she declares to the muzhik: so supposedly and so - I from you "have flown", drive 500 roubles on commercial abortion. According to the friend, I have understood, that in a month it does on such 10 "abortions", and a beret for them on 500-2000 roubles from each "father", depending on a thickness of a purse. It and the prostitute you will not name, and bludnichaet it with muzhiks in the pleasure, and at money. I have learnt about all and have come to speak to it. She driven into a corner, has confessed, that so earns for a life, time has reduced it on work and the prices mad. Also says, that loves only me, agree to throw matrosit muzhiks, time we will get married. About, whether it was pregnant from me 10 years ago, has told, that was. But I have not believed, and we have left.

The girlfriend tried to prove, that it not the prostitute and did not take money and did not sleep with muzhiks who pay at once to women for a night. From such it is possible to be typed also AIDS. That it had "a pure business". Filled in to me, but I have not believed (the man, 31 year).

*... My girlfriend has picked up three years ago in the street the most beautiful muzhik literally. Now lives with it. The handsome man not to tear off eyes. Silent, polite, affable, unpretentious: eats, that give. Does not drink, does not smoke, does not work. Also is not going to work. Says to the wife and the mother-in-law, that never in a life worked and will not be. If its former wives expelled for it, there and then there was other woman who selected it. Here such convinced has got the parasite. I ask the girlfriend: how many it will hold it on the neck? And she answers, that for a long time concerns this husband as to a thoroughbred animal and holds it for own pleasure. He eats no more Rottweiler and a sheep-dog, dogs, and the man after all near by are much more tender. Where supposedly it then will find the beautiful man. And live (the woman, 30 years).

*... I write down the mistresses in such small note book. Names I write it is ciphered, age - it is obligatory, that the nobility the most very young and the most senior: I have young women who already thought of pension, but is and absolutely "zelenki" - students of local institute. - the most desperate, they clever, with them it is more safe than the student, and they are able much. In the book I do not write their birthdays, I write only months. Has noticed, that all my mistresses were born in March, August and September. Accident. In the book I bring and "telnye" details: whether the girl, whether there were at whom children. Who had children - with those easier: they zhadnee love.

The main thing, I bring in notes, that I with them did. Whether she has agreed on oral sex, how many broke, krikuha or not. Certainly, especially I conduct calculation, how many time with what was. Tried to consider love nights, but this employment subjective: you will not understand, when it begins or comes to an end. Still I put a black framework on those names of women for which to me beat a physiognomy. It is pleasant to consider "horned" husbands. It is even more pleasant to communicate with the "horned" husband then. There is in it a risky pleasure (the guy, 26 years).

*... Last summer I have got acquainted with the gangster. Stood at a stop, the man has approached to me and has started to get acquainted. Behind conversation I have learnt, that it the gangster, is engaged in drug traffic and the weapon. I have become interested in it though by sight it was not similar to the abrupt. Once a month we met, it drove me in restaurant, we communicated. He told how much now different drugs, bragged, that already trades not only pistols and automatic machines, but also grenade cup discharges and red mercury. It was interesting to listen to it: in what countries it went recently, that saw there, as "prokutyval" money. And I trusted it. But recently left on street early in the morning and in the bus has seen it in working clothes with the same muzhiks. It has appeared not the gangster, and the exemplary family man, works as the worker at metallurgical combine, after each pay hid from the wife half of pay and conducted me in restaurant to spend on drink "gangster" money. And about the different countries told from books, takes in libraries the book about Italy and powders to me brains about their nature. Then he swore to me pure love, explained the lies by that was afraid of me to lose, but I to it have not believed (the girl, 19 years).

*... I gave some announcements and still answered with letters female announcements. Searched for the skilled mistress till 35 years to be for it the sex slave. In September I have got acquainted with the married woman ' which was by sight ' likely ' 35-40 years. Our intimate appointment went in the beginning not bad. It has organised a supper at candles at home: the husband was in holiday. We have drunk, have smoked ' it to me has presented expensive lighter. But at us it has then ceased to be glued. Already it was time to me to undertake the main thing, but it rebuffed me. Asked to be more gentle and to caress it in clothes. I have begun to hesitate to wait ' "have pushed" a wine glass ' began to undress violently her, and have broken off a dress. But it has not abused me, and has moaned from pleasure. And when I its section completely ' that I have moaned from disappointment. A stomach at "grandmother" and a breast were folds and sacks ' but she played a role of the girl (or a moth) ' being drunk I do not remember. In general, sex was short. At me any keen interest ' I was gone to it began to think of little girls from the group ' to be excited. And here then all became o'kej. But she asked more and more. I speak to it: "you have a husband ' with it and will be" still-still "' and at me business". Here knock at a door ' I all to suffice and naked on a balcony ' there in banks - was screwed. But it was not the husband ' and its girlfriend. To the girlfriend was years 50 ' and I began gather sharply home (the guy ' 20 years).

*... It was for a long time. I was taken from dances home by my new acquaintance Serezha. Dances were in a city ' and I (and I live) lived in settlement. I was late for a familiar passing car. Serezha it was caused me to spend on foot. It is kilometres 50. I ' am final ' suspected ' that is necessary to me with it for this self-denying act to pay off. And ' can be ' caresses to the full. What fool will go so simply to see off the girl so far?! We go ' means. He is silent. I too am silent. So five have passed kilometres. To me though was then 20 years ' but I already had unfortunate love with one dishonourable man ' therefore for female honour did not worry any more. I go and solve: itself I will close eyes thus and it I will ask not to spy? And we go silently already kilometres 20. By any lesochka. " SHCHas ' - I think ' - it will stick to me ". Now it is not a shame to admit ' but from such burdensome expectation I even have wanted it very much. There have passed already many different bushes ' are silent - words. Have reached my house in settlement. I already all from passion am exhausted. Has put to it a hand on his elbow ' I speak:" You want something? "- also I close eyes. It was trampled and answers:"Waters". I have taken out a water mug ' it have drunk. Has stood and speaks:" Well, I have gone ". Also has left. I recollect its all life (the woman ' 44 years).

*... Once we ' three friends ' have decided to scare little girls. One stood on "opaske": it was about an entrance and gave signals ' when the girl entered into an entrance. I in a mask King-Konga met the girl at the ground floor lift. Terribly growled. The third of us stood with a stop watch on the ninth floor ' to mark: for how many minutes the frightened girl will reach on steps 9th floor. We so joked at several entrances. Girls ran upward for 37-52 seconds. On the ninth floor her calmed and got acquainted ' when it turned out. Once I "was pinned" and have begun to roar on the elderly aunt. She ran for me to the ninth floor. I have reached for 29 seconds ' and there we have left on the lift on the ground floor.

*... If I wish to oversleep with the decent man ' that I do thus: I drink 5 grammes of vodka (for a smell) and in another's area I leave after 22 hours on street. I pretend to be vusmert the drunk woman ' I am unsteady ' I catch at corners of houses or trees... Always there will be an intelligent man ' which will pick up the defenceless woman and ' using its deranged condition ' will make the black business. Decent men are especially greedy in the street for drunk women. But decent vagabonds and boozers prevent to glue. They too stick to my "drunk" person and suggest to spend to a cellar. From them I have one true means: I whisper on an ear ' that I am ill with AIDS ' but sweet as "Baunti". Understand ' sympathise, and quickly from me escape (the girl ' 29 years).

*... It we with the wife advertised in an exchange of wives for night. I write, as well as promised, the very first and, I hope, unique our adventure. To exchange wives have solved exactly at 18 o'clock in the evening, that is my wife directly from work has gone to sleep with another's muzhik, and the wife of this muzhik during same time has come to sleep to me home. Had supper and as could, have talked: conversation was not moulded - both in pressure. I have had time to notice, that my wife prepares is better and more purely washes ware. And to make tea another's wife is not able at all - drank slops... Have sat down to the TV. The Dumas not about that: I look at the screen and a fig I do not understand. In a bed have laid down early. Sex have finished in 10 minutes. We lay, and both would not like any more. Have chatted in darkness. It became boring. Have included light, took under the book and began to read. I feel the full idiot: I lay near to the beautiful and bared mistress and I read a detective, and she reads the female novel. I was read till two nights, she read about one hour.

In the morning she has forgotten to switch off during time gas under a frying pan, under a coffee pot and perezhgla an iron. I have forgotten it to kiss at parting and have with relief taken breath, when it was cleaned for work. As has reached work, has there and then called the native wife and has venomously taken an interest, before what o'clock in the morning they read fiction. The wife already poperhnulas from surprise: "Whence you know?"

It is more wives we will not vary. To fornicate it is necessary on the sly and gradually that there was no time for reading of books (the man, the age is not specified).

*... We with the girlfriend bathed on a beach and have seen, that any guys nearby began to bathe. Weather was bad, and on a beach more was nobody. I have suggested the girlfriend to pretend, that we sink. And children will rescue us, and we will get acquainted with them.

Us have rescued, have pulled out on coast and began to do artificial breath. Hardly hands have not torn off. It has not helped: we with the girlfriend laid, as drowned women. Children have thought and began to do to us artificial breath "a mouth in a mouth". It was pleasant to us. It, similar, too it was pleasant. We have not choked With "kisses" nearly and have pretended, that have revived, but without consciousness. Young men run round us - rescue. Also have already grown bolder: have pulled together from me bjustik a bathing suit and pretend, that pound to me a breast. I have moaned, but to myself have not come. From their conversation I have understood, that they have solved me trahnut that I was warmed and left a shock, but cannot solve in any way who will be "doctor"... From me these "doctors" have pulled together the bathing suit rests. I from their such impudence all have turned white for a rage, but I lay quietly. Has slightly opened an eye and I see such picture: children perevozbudilis and at them it is bad with erektsiej. Stand as morons with the lowered swimming trunks and look at my feet. And suddenly I feel: One of them to try to lay down on me. I open one eye and I say to it, that at me the dangerous period and my future son too will be "doctor". From this my phrase the girlfriend has suddenly revived and began to laugh. I have risen, closed by someone's shirt and too have started to laugh. And guys of hour two could not come to the senses, having learnt about our draw. But we have got acquainted with wonderful guys and three days walked with them. But now they have left home in other city. They have appeared zhenatikami, and we did not begin to be engaged with them sex. But sometimes, under their persevering request, kissed (girls, 22 and 23 years) a little.

*... I have opened to it a door. Whether trust, shchuplenky such, high brunette, very narrow, as kilechka, in points and with gvozdichkami. Everything, has solved, it is time to build the happiness. How many it is possible to prove to muzhiks, what I will live without them? This, under the announcement, dreamt of romantic love and serious relations. From offered tapok has refused, but for an evening four times of soaps of a hand. Some vodka did not drink, ate inertly, badly distinguished fowl from fish. Specially on hours has looked: has called in marriage on 32nd minute. Has decided not to break. Sat well. He spoke, and I estimated, as its appearance to improve. Under my insisting remained to spend the night. Has laid down on a folding bed and to me did not ask. A breakfast has refused, but has risked to glance to me for cut. For it I have shaken hands with it. Same evening otrevelas on a shoulder of the favourite married lover. On Saturday went to the cinema with "sprat". All saw: gvozdichki, a cake and kolu. Drank tea with my pies in the evening. Has laid down with me. Sex was not. On Sunday has come to me with mum. It has burnt me a sight and has interrogated. I have withdrawn it aside and have told, that we have overslept with her son. She has told, that already knows about it. I have asked again the future mother-in-law: whether she knows, how it has occurred? The mother-in-law knew. Well, I think, into the fair has run. For wedding prepared humanly. There was a marriage night, even a little. Thank God, was born nothing. Has already calmed down. I will divorce, as there will be time, but in marriage for the decent man more never will go. The man should be the man. That's all my married adventure. While I search for the lover with a body for meetings (the woman, 31 year).

*... My love affair was not absolutely mine. I came back last March from Moscow in a thin car with reserved seats. With me one girl (as it was then found out from Sheksna) went to a compartment. Harmonous, nice. In black jeans and with charming brown eyes. We poulybalis the friend the friend, but conversation and was not adjusted. I with pleasure considered a birthmark on a harmonous neck and long jeans legs in beautiful half boots. After time, my head began to visit poganenkie thoughts: well it razgovorit to give to drink strong wine, to sit down near and to look under a thin sweater for two small bugorka. In general, meal and baldeju. She sometimes looks at me, not guessing about nechistote my thoughts. Time went. The girl has got tired of a silent seat and languidly kneaded handles, stretched seductively and bent. I suddenly have sharply wanted to accustom to drinking its wine and to take away drunk in platform, to take advantage of this wonderful case. My imagination already drew our employment by love in empty platform of the car, but my dreams were stirred by a small imagined problem. I even mentally could not solve: how in platform and without a bed to make the most pleasant certificate? I represented, that it rests gentle handles against carload glass, but the head by all means should knock on a windowpane. And at light it will be a shame to it. Whether there is there a switch? My dreams have interrupted with the advent of the third passenger. The young cheerful guy of years 28 villages at intermediate station. It has got one from the diplomat, and then other bottle of vodka and has quickly persuaded us not to miss, and to keep the company. By two o'clock we were strongly drank too much. My fellow travellers have gone to platform to smoke. I have waited for their minutes twenty and have gone too to smoke.

Is better would not go. This guy has quickly solved my problem. The girl (the same as and in my dreams) rested gentle hands against carload glass, and its head slightly fought about this window as it has thrown to it over a head the jacket.

I have hasty slipped out platform and somehow idiotically have thus thought: "As I have not thought about a jacket?! And the head does not fight about glass, and is dark to it under it".

In settlement Sheksna she was met by the husband (the man, 32 years).

*... My husband was in the next departure, and I have invited to myself the already rather of the lover who has bothered to me. I lay under it, boredom mortal, and suddenly a long distance call from the husband. I wished to drive in the beginning from myself the lover, but have then solved - let dangles.

I take a tube and joyfully I welcome the husband. It on me throws out a matrimonial set of diminutive and caressing words, trifling news and other trifles. Suddenly I feel: on me the lover has woken up and it is successful enough, began to do to me very pleasantly. I, naturally, have strained and I answer it with good good. The voice at me starts to shiver, and the husband on other end of a wire worries, asks: whether I am healthy, whether happen that? This minute also happens, and there and then once again happens. I answer the husband with the stranger, a toneless voice. Well, the lover has flown into a rage from an unusual situation, feels on me the present Tarzan, rattles about love. I to it cover a mouth with one hand, to the second a tube hardly I am insolent, and where my feet - at all I do not know. For five minutes of long distance call - three times it was good! A week later I have repeated this experiment already intentionally. Called from embraces of the lover to the husband for work. Minutes thirty discussed with it forthcoming purchases and repair of our apartment, and at this time I such got up with the lover. Me twirled and shifted duly successful love appointment. Especially freely to lay on a stomach, to wave legs and to beg the husband for a new fur coat. But I and on it have not calmed down. I have insisted, and the lover has called the wife, and I very much stirred to it. About as I to it am sweet stirred! It has sustained all. Since then it seems to me, that every second husband calls home about a delay from work, not climbing down thus from the secretary. Muzhiks after all shameless since a birth...

We called such juicy minutes and my best girlfriend. To it I admitted, than this minute I am engaged. It so was got, that began us to give councils and itself has thought up to spend the sexual space bridge first in a city: it with the lover and phone, and I with the lover and phone.

*... At the woman "the love truth" always should win. Well, let even in many years it should learn, that it has lost, having left from it. This revenge time - a fairy tale for the left woman.

*... The most widespread erotic man's: has gone at night to a toilet ' and, coming back back, has mixed doors or beds, therefore has casually lain down to other woman. And while understood, has made all sexual relations. ZHenshchina'estestvenno ' did not resist, and pretended in the morning, that happens nothing.

*... Memoirs doktorshi from the invocatory commission: first time the adult person publicly takes off pants more often in a building of a city military registration and enlistment office. It is the first military medical board is the most severe test for the first 18 years of a life. Recruits hesitate always: small an intim an economy - hesitate, big - hesitate even more. One, for example, travmaticheski has been castrated - went on "the white ticket", and that hesitated. I speak to it: "That you there cover?" And he explains to me, that millimetres five there still remains.

Alexey VINOGRADOV.

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