Wednesday, August 27, 2003

Prison Daze


When I was in High School I had to take a course in american civics, well we had to go on a field trip to the local prison and that's where the fun begins. I first noticed my phobia of being locked up when upon getting out of the school bus and walking into the prison staging area, I hear a loud grating noise and turn to see these big 20ft high steel doors sliding shut, (the sound those doors made slamming together is a sound that still gives me the shivers to this day, my teacher got a big laugh out of the expression on my face and proceeded to tell me if I didn't straighten up that that is where I would end up. (Ha! I showed him). Now we are all standing in this prison staging area just hanging around with prisoners waiting to be put in there (real safe huh) at least they were handcuffed and there was probably 20 cops in this one area, anyway they are taking us on a tour of the prison and we walk through by this window booth with a lady in it with a sign saying no weapons beyond this point, the cops put their guns and billy clubs in this drawer and proceed to lead us through this door, well after entering this next room with more prisoners around I got to thinking and took my pocket knife out of my pocket and asked the teacher if I should have left this at the window, well the teacher goes into a panic attack as I am pounced (rather roughly I might add :-)) upon and shoved to the floor by about 4 cops trying to get the knife out of my hand, the cops are yelling drop it , I'm laying on the ground with these cops fighting me and I'm yelling get up get up and the teacher is walking in circles going OH Crap Oh Crap...... well they finally get the knife out of my hand and get me off the ground and the teacher in a panic asks if anyone else has any knifes which of course with 13/14yr old boys everyone has a pocket knife.... this teacher about passes out the prisoners are enjoying the show and the cops took all our knifes for safe keeping :-). The police were nice and gave us our knifes back except for one boy who had a 8 inch butterfly knife in his sock so they kept that one :-). Morale of the story.... if you make it past the doors don't offer you weapon hehe :-).

Later
WhoMe

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

Cold Coke anyone?


I guess I should get all the embarrasing stories out in the open :-). I can recall about 11 yrs ago I guess, I was working for a grocery store chain operating their mainframe, well when it was time to go I thought I would buy me a nice cold coke to drink on the way home, so I did. You have to badge in and out of the mainframe area and walk through data processing which is a group of women sitting in a room entering data. I come back from getting my coke and gather my stuff to leave, I noticed I had so much stuff to carry out that I put the cold coke in my pants pocket (my pants were light beige btw), I go over to badge out and at the same time another person was coming in so I turned sideways facing one of the data entry ladies to get by the other person, well when I did this........ I bumped into the sharp corner of her desk with my leg..... at the same spot as my pants pocket....... :-(. The next thing I hear is a psftt of a puncturing can and I feel Ice Cold Coke spewing across my waist area :-) , the woman I was facing started screaming because she felt something wet splash on her and turned to see the front of my beige pants soaking wet (she thought I had lost control or punctured a body part) I'm yelling cold cold cold and dripping coke down my pants leg into the carpet on the floor.... one of the other ladies jumped up and brought over a small metal garbage can and I put my leg/foot into this garbage can........ So I'm standing in the middle of a room full of women with one woman yelling and my foot in the garbage can when the HR manager walks in to see who was yelling and what it was about.... He opens the door and there I am with my foot in the can and the front of my pants soaking wet... and the only response he has is I don't want to know and then he leaves. In the years after looking back at the moment it is funny now but wasn't very funny at the time hehe.

Later All
WhoMe