poison

Poisoned
by Leloi

A sharp pain stabbed at his neck and he immediately reached up to rub the discomfort away. Pulling out what looked to be a thorn, he stared at it in confusion.

“What’s wrong?” Kagome asked in concern, staring at him.

“I… nothing… something…” Inuyasha answered, looking at the sharp object covered in his own blood that clung to his fingertips. In a small poof of smoke, the thorn disappeared, leaving only his blood. “That’s… odd.”

“What’s odd?” Miroku asked, stopping on the path before him to look back at the hanyou and the miko.

Sango only advanced a few more steps past the houshi before stopping and looking back at the rest of the group behind her. “Is there something wrong?”

“Inuyasha?” Kagome breathed, looking the hanyou in his eyes. His usual vibrant orbs were dull and his whole face looked pale. “Are you feeling ok?”

“It’s nothing…” But his knees buckled and he fell to the dusty road. “I’ll be fine…”

The young miko knelt beside him, her face covered with concern. “No… I think… something is wrong.”

The others gathered around the fallen hanyou. His pale face frowned in agitation. “Get away. I’m FINE! There’s nothing wrong with me… I just…”

“You fell.” Miroku stated critically, resting his staff on his shoulder.

“Inuyasha-sama…” Myouga began, plunging his pointed snoot into the hanyou’s cheek.

Inuyasha face twisted in disgust as he tried to make a swipe at the flea demon. His hand seemed to be nothing more than a dead piece of meat at the end of his arm and missed the target. His friends all stared at him in horror as they witnessed his lack of coordination. “Stop staring…”

Sango and Miroku discreetly looked away. Shippou could only cling to Kagome’s thigh, making worried whimpers.

“Inuyasha-sama…” Myouga began, pulling himself from the assessing taste of his master’s blood. “You’ve been poisoned. I’ve never tasted anything like it… it’s taking control of your blood. I can’t drink it all… there would be nothing left. I’m sorry, master. I can’t cure you.”

“Poisoned?” Inuyasha whispered, suddenly feeling an overwhelming sense of dizziness. There was nothing more he wanted to do than lay there in the road until it passed.

“Inuyasha!” Kagome caught his shoulders before he could slam his head against the ground. “Inuyasha?”

For a moment he was afraid, knowing he was completely helpless. Was this what it was like to die? The last thing he felt before he lost consciousness were her arms tightening on him as the darkness took him.

^.~

Inuyasha awoke to the sound of things being moved. His eyes searched the hut until they rested on Kagome moving near the fireplace. “What are you doing?”

Kagome turned to face him, covering her mouth with her hand. “I didn’t mean to wake you. I was just… making you some food.”

“You don’t have to. I’m not hungry.” Inuyasha replied and immediately wished he hadn’t for the look on her face. “Shouldn’t you be out with the others, finding fragments?”

“They told me to stay with you.” Idly her hand touched the pot she had been using before he woke.

“Go ahead and cook for me, if you think you must.” His eyes stared at the ceiling of the hut for a few awkward moments. “Kagome? When I die…”

“Don’t say things like that!” The girl immediately barked.

His eyes fell back on her. “Don’t be stupid. You know this poison… you heard Myouga. There’s no cure.”

Crawling across the floor and sitting down beside him, she took his unresponsive hand in her own. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t suppose there are any funerals for hanyou…”

“That’s not funny!” Kagome cried, wiping her tears.

“It’s not meant to be.” The hanyou bit his lip nervously. “I entrust my body to you. Do what you think is best with it. And… take my sword. I don’t want anyone else to have it.”

“Inuyasha…”

His eyes stared up into hers. “Don’t cry. I hate seeing you cry.”

“Why me?”

Closing his eyes, a look of pain passed over his face. “I trust you. You’re the only one who…” A smile brightened the pained look and his eyes opened to refocus on hers. “You cry for me. No one, except mother, ever really cried for me.”

“Shippou cries…”

“He’s young.”

“Inuyasha, I want you to live.”

His eyes held hers for a long time, amber orbs filled with sadness and longing touched hers. “Don’t let Kouga take you a his woman.”

A sob escaped her as she rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. “I won’t. I know how much that always bothered you.”

His gaze slid away, almost as if he wasn’t speaking to her. “You should have someone special… someone who will care for you. I don’t want you following me so soon to the afterlife because some idiot couldn’t take care of you.”

“Inuyasha, stop it!” Her whole body crumpled forward until she lay on his arm and shoulder. “I don’t think I can be with anyone… for a long time.”

“I’ll wait for you on the other side.” His words were softly spoken.

Kagome sat up a bit and wiped her eyes. Her face dipped down to kiss his shoulder.

His eyes followed her movements with interest.

Her lips touched his collarbone and then his cheek. With a sniffle she kissed the side of his lips.

Shutting his eyes, he made a kissing sound when she barely touched his lips. Waiting for a long time, he finally opened his eyes to stare up at her… her face so close to his own.

“Do you… care about me?”

A brief smile touched his lips. “I would die for you.”

Gently her lips touched his and rested against them. For a long time, neither moved to break off the touch. Then Inuyasha’s tongue lapped at her lips briefly before his mouth closed again and his breathing slowed. Kagome broke off the kiss, watching his body go limp. Her hand touched his chest, feeling the slow rise and fall of his breathing. “Sleep well.” The blankets were pulled back up around him and she want back to her cooking.

^.~

“Why am I always human and dying whenever anything nice happens between me and Kagome?” Human Inuyasha demanded.

His demon counterpart glared down from the tree above his head. “Don’t look at me. It’s because of you that I even FEEL these urges. If I had my way then no one would get close to us. You KNOW what happened last time we even thought of loving.”

“That was different. We were younger then.” The human sat down. Around him the dreamscape shimmered and changed so he and his other side sat on rocks instead. “And you’re deluding yourself. I KNOW how you feel about Kagome. I’m you, remember?”

The demon lounged against the rocks. “Does it matter? We’re dying. I want to get out there and go down in a fight… instead of this fucking wasting away from the inside crap.”

“Why haven’t we ever told her how we feel?”

“What good will it do us? She’s human and we’re hanyou. There’s no place for us in her world.”

“Then why do we exist?”

“I leave all that ‘finding meaning in life’ crap up to you.”

“I don’t want to die yet.” The human sniffled and watched the dreamscape change again. This time there were in a palace. “Hey… this is where I was born.” The young man stood and looked around, casually stepping over his demon side that lounged across the floor.

“This is where our pain began. Humans feared us. They threatened mother, so she took us away.” The demon yawned, unimpressed. “Do you still need proof that we DON’T belong?”

The human frowned as the landscape changed again, this time to the well. “I want to wake up. If I’m to die… I want my last few moments to be awake with her.”

“You just want to laid.” The demon chuckled.

“You want it too.”

“For selfish reasons.”

“So Kouga won’t take her?”

“Her life belongs to me.”

“US.” The human corrected rather sharply.

“Us.” The demon conceded.

“I don’t think it will happen, anyway. I can barely move in that body.”

“If I was there, I would FIND a way.”

The human side smiled, thinking on just what the demon side would do to assure the mating. “I’m sure you would.”

The landscape went dark.

^.~

“He’s getting worse…”

“… won’t last the night”

“… could do more to…”

Reality rolled over Inuyasha in waves as he struggled to regain consciousness.

“I love him.”

The room came into focus as he forced his eyes open.

“Look. He’s awake.” Kaede remarked softly.

Kagome crawled over from the fire and took his hand. “Inuyasha? How do you feel?”

“Like shit.”

“Is there anything you want?”

“Stay with me.”

“I am staying with you.” Kagome replied, looking a bit confused.

“I mean… I’m cold. Keep me warm?”

The girl obeyed, laying down and tenderly wrapping an arm around his body. “Is there anything else?”

“Not really. Just talk to me.”

Kagome stared at his face. Dark eyebrows that normally knit together with pain or anger were relaxed. His eyes were closed and heavy, dark eyelashes fluttered a bit as his jaw moved in a chewing motion. Chapped lips puckered a bit as his strangely pointed nose flared its nostrils. “Is there anything… special you want me to do with your body when you’re…”

His eyes fluttered open and blue eyes stared at her. “I leave that up to you.”

“I know, but do you want your remains burned or…”

“Whatever you feel is best.”

“Where do you want your grave to be?”

His eyes closed a moment and he took a deep breath. “Where we met.”

“Under the tree?”

“Yeah.” His eyes opened again. “I’m very cold.”

Her hand gently explored his hands, finding them to be frigid. Cautiously her fingers explored his arm, finding it also cool to the touch. Quickly she sat up and pushed her hand under his kimono, seeking out skin. “Your skin is cool.”

A shiver passed through him at her heated touch. “Take me outside. I don’t want to die in here.”

“But it’s cold out there, too.”

“Then keep me warm. I don’t like staying indoors, you know that.”

With some difficulty she managed to drag him outside into the cold night and away from the village. With the last of her strength she pulled his body off the road and into the grass near the hut they had been in. Her body collapsed against his and she struggled to regain her breathing. “Inuyasha?”

“I’m still here.” Came his reply in the darkness.

Her body rolled on top of his, offering him heat. “I’m sorry I shattered the jewel… and used the word against you… and was jealous over your relationship with Kikyou… and…”

“Shut up, Kagome.”

“But I feel bad about it.”

“Remember when you thought I was watching you bathe… and I told you I wasn’t? I was.”

“What does that…?”

“And then the time when I found you in the vat of sake? I nearly died when I saw you… my blood rushed into a non vital organ so fast it made me dizzy.”

“You gave me your…”

“And the time I turned full demon? I knew your scent. Something in me knew not to hurt you. I was afraid that I would forget… but I didn’t. I didn’t forget you. I couldn’t.”

“What are you saying?”

His eyes stared up at her in the darkness before his eyelids slowly slid shut. His breathing slowed and stopped altogether.

“Inuyasha? Inuyasha, tell me.” Kagome breathed, resting her head on his chest. Beneath her ear, his heartbeat slowed and stopped. Tears slid down from her cheeks as her body shook with emotion. “Wake up.”

In the darkness his black hair faded to white as stripes crossed his cheeks.

“Please… Inuyasha… don’t leave me.” Kagome moaned against his chest. “I love you.”

Canines elongated and red eyes opened as the heart lurched and began to pump again wildly. Clawed hands reached up and lightly scratched at the woman atop him.

Kagome sat up with a start, staring down at the body below her. “Inuyasha?”

The demon sat up, growling softly in the darkness.

“You’re…”

The demon sprang, catching the young woman around the waist and hoisting her onto his shoulders. His speed took them far away from the village… far away from the scent of death.

Kagome didn’t make any sounds of protest. Somehow, someway the demon side of Inuyasha had found a way to take over as it had often done when he was threatened with imminent death. But he had died, hadn’t he? And yet somehow he had come back. But… this form was dangerous, acting on instinct alone. What instinct was it acting on now?

The demon stopped in a small clearing and put Kagome down before investigating the circle of trees around it.

“Inuyasha…” Kagome whispered, staring at the one that stalked nearby.

The demon froze and looked back at her with a growl, continuing its investigation.

“Inuyasha, do you know me?”

Satisfied that they were alone, the demon returned to the young woman, crouching down beside her.

“You know me, right? You told me you don’t forget who I am when you’re like this.”

The demon growled softly in the back of his throat. His woman talked too much. In an instant his teeth were at her throat.

Kagome gave out a startled scream, feeling something sharp on her neck.

The demon lapped at the blood he had freed, feeling it tingle within him. It was a different tingle than the one the poison caused. Already his blood fought to get rid of the poison in his system.

Kagome relaxed a bit, feeling his tongue against the place his teeth had bit her. His hands massaged at her back, making her almost believe that this was his way of… showing affection. And yet his human and hanyou sides were nothing like this.

With a grunt the demon’s claws caught at her body, directing her onto her hands and knees. Rough hands pushed her skirt up and her panties down as he knelt to sniff at her womanhood. This was the source of all the wonderful scents that emanated from her. Her scent told him she wasn’t fertile, but that didn’t matter.

Kagome gasped and looked back behind her. What was he doing? When he pushed her onto her hands and knees, she got a little bit of the idea of what the demon wanted. But now he was sniffing her. His nose lightly tapped at her when he got too close. Gritting her teeth, she felt silly out in the open with him sniffing her like an animal. Quickly she sat back down on her legs.

With a feral growl the demon caught her hips and tried to make her to get back up. His woman resisted a bit, but he managed to keep her up long enough for him to finish his assessment of her scent. With a nip on her ass, he let her go.

“Ow!” Kagome cried, touching where he bit. “Must you keep biting me?”

The demon sat, not far away and stared at her in the darkness. For the moment, he waited for some more of the poison to be neutralized before he made his move.

“Inuyasha…” Slowly she crawled towards him. “What is it you want? Did the demon part of you save you? Will you be able to change back?” Sitting back on her legs she stared at him. “Is the rest of you dead?” Reaching out to him, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. “Come back to me.”

The demon growled. His woman was making noises again. Somewhere inside he knew she was concerned about him. But he couldn’t allow the human side to come back… not yet. That would mean death. Almost a bit to roughly, he pushed her away. Red eyes stared at her, warning her to stay back.

Kagome hugged her body with her arms, staring down at the ground dejectedly. “I guess… you are dead.” Tears fell down her cheeks, soaking her shirt.

For a long time the demon stared at her, willing his body to hurry up with processing the poison. Her tears always bothered him no matter what form he took. They bit at his soul, bringing to surface every guilt or sadness he held from every slight he caused her.

Kagome sat back and rested her arms onto her knees, crying on them. “What is it you want with me? If the rest of you is dead, what’s left? I don’t understand.”

Perhaps the human side had been right. Perhaps he did want to fuck her as much as the other side did… and maybe it wasn’t just because of Kouga. But the human side would temper the raw, lusting feelings with caring. The demon did not want to care… instead it wanted to take and possess. Unfortunately survival had to come first so he couldn’t just… fuck her. Slowly he crawled towards her sobbing form and reached out to run a claw down the side of her cheek.

The young woman gasped more out of surprise than pain. “What?” Warily she watched as he brought a bloody claw to his lips and tasted her blood again. “Are you going to… eat me?” This side of him seemed to like the taste of her blood. Visions filled her head of him sucking her dry to get it all. “Are you going to kill me?”

The demon snarled, nearly spitting on the ground at the look she gave him. His woman was rather stupid in many regards. Her fear was evident in her eyes. Did she truly not know what he wanted? No wonder his other side couldn’t get laid. Quickly he leaned forward, licking her cut with his tongue. Roughly his hands pushed her back on the ground as he lay almost on top of her. His body was too weak to do much else and he had to rest.

Kagome lay pinned to the ground under half off Inuyasha’s body. It was warm and somewhat soft despite the rough and frightening exterior. If the demon side wanted her dead, wouldn’t it have done it by now?

^.~

The sun poured over the small clearing, wedging itself under Kagome’s eyelids. Blinking, she looked around, feeling slightly confused at her surroundings. Something warm lay almost completely on top of her. For a while she studied the stripes on the cheeks of Inuyasha in demon form. Taking a deep breath, she rolled his body off of hers and came face to face with cold, red eyes. “You’re still… demon.”

“Shut up, bitch.” The demon answered through clenched teeth.

Kagome sat up in shock. Never had she expected such words from him.

The demon sat up, glaring hard at her. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“You can… understand me?”

“No, I just pretend to speak your language… idiot.”

“Why must you be so mean?” Kagome stared down at her hands.

“Be thankful you’re not dead.” The demon replied, standing.

“Would you kill me?”

“I’ve killed innocents. Why wouldn’t I kill you too?”

“You haven’t yet. And I was told you recognize me no matter what form you’re in.”

“That may be… it doesn’t mean I won’t kill you.” The demon smirked.

The color left her cheeks as she stared at him in shock. “The Inuyasha I know… is he dead?”

“No. But that body is weak from the poison. Good riddance.”

Kagome stared at the ground, shaking her head. “I don’t believe that you can be so cruel. I’ve seen you upset about the innocent lives you’ve taken. You can’t tell me you enjoy being like this.”

“And what if I do? What does it matter?” Squatting before her, he took her face in his hand. “Does it scare you?”

Kagome met the cold red eyes with her own eyes. “Yes.”

“Good.” The demon chuckled, releasing her chin. “I won’t kill you. I may fuck you so hard you wish you were dead… but I won’t kill you.”

Kagome’s eyes went wide with his admission. “You don’t… want that.”

“Don’t tell me what I want.” His eyes slid down her form and back up again. “You know nothing of my needs.”

“And what about Kikyou?” Kagome whispered, wrapping her arms around her body, feeling naked under his gaze.

With a savage snarl the demon pounced on her, pushing her back on the ground. His body pinned her down. “Bitch… It is my own business whether I wish to fuck Kikyou or not. If I were you, I’d be more concerned with your own body and how I’ll violate it.”

Tears filled Kagome’s eyes, and she looked away, weeping. Her Inuyasha was gone. What sort of demon took his place?

Grunting, the demon glared hard at her. “Don’t DO that.”

“What?”

“Cry. Stop it. I hate it when you cry.”

“Why?” Kagome sniffled, continuing to look away.

~Because it means I failed you.~ “Just stop now!” His claws lightly traced where they had cut her cheek the previous night. “If you make me turn back, I will die a horrible, painful death, being eaten alive from the inside by a poison. This is the only way I can live. If you make me FEEL now… There’s no way I can survive.”

“What do my tears have to do with that?” The young woman stared up at him in confusion.

“Change me back… and I’m dead.”

“Then what do I do?”

“Just lay there like a good little girl until this thing wears off.” Sitting back on his haunches, he stared at her.

“Will you change back?” Kagome whispered, sitting up.

“A little part of me is back. It’s what’s allowing me to think straight. It might take over as the poison is neutralized. I don’t know. Maybe you’re stuck with me forever. How would you like that?” A dangerous gleam filled the demon’s eyes.

“Forever?” Kagome shook her head and stared down at the ground. “You mean for as long as we’re looking for jewel fragments. Not forever, right?”

“I mean forever. You think I would let you go fuck another man after I’ve had you? You’re a fool.” The demon tucked his arms into his kimono sleeves and stared dully at the ground at his feet.

Kagome cocked her head to the side, regarding him. “You’re serious, aren’t you? Someday you are going to… claim me… aren’t you?”

“And the bitch gets a clue.” The demon chuckled. “The question is… when? Will it be tomorrow? How about a week from now? Next year? Right now?” Licking his lips, he scooted closer. His blood told him that it was not yet time. There was still a lot of damage that needed to be fixed before he could do anything physical to her. But what was to stop someone from hunting her down and taking her first? What had he been waiting for before? “My humanity is weak. It wants me to wait until the time is right… until you are ready. But the demon in me… is in control now. I want to feel you writhe helplessly against me when I claim you. I want to hear you scream my name.” Reaching out for her, he pushed her onto her hands and knees and began to untie the sash for his hakama.

Kagome stared back at him in shock, feeling her panties once again pulled down and something hot pressed against her inner thigh. “Now? You can’t mean now. Inuyasha… Please don’t.” Tears ran down her cheeks as she gave him a pleading look. “If you have any love for me, please not like this.”

The demon gave her a hurt look. Closing his eyes, a soft grunt escaped his throat and fell a bit forward, against her back. Her arms and legs couldn’t handle their combined weight and she collapsed, feeling him heavy and warm against her back.

For a long time they lay unmoving against the ground… not that Kagome could move if she wanted to. Inuyasha’s weight covered her completely, making it difficult to even breathe. Finally she gathered enough strength, to push against the ground, sliding him off of her back. Warily she sat beside him, staring down at his pained face. The stripes were still there. Reaching down, she pulled the front of his hakama back up to cover him. Slowly she became aware that eyes were upon her. They were his own eyes, even though everything else about him indicated the hidden demon. “Are you… alright?”

“I… hurt… inside.” Inuyasha answered slowly. His eyes trailed down to where one of her hands rested on his unbound sash. “What did I do?”

“You stopped.” Kagome whispered, moving her hand away.

“Yes, I remember that part.”

“You’re… back?”

“Not myself yet. There’s still a lot left to heal.” His breaths came in short gasps and his face contorted with pain. “I… tried to force you, didn’t I?”

“You didn’t.”

“I’m sorry.” His eyes closed as he struggled with the pain. “Shit… it hurts.”

“You weren’t ready to come back this much, were you?” Kagome gently touched his face.

“I couldn’t let myself do that to you. I couldn’t…” Slowly his eyes opened and focused on her. “Kagome, I’m sorry.”

Wrapping her arm around his shoulder, she lay down beside him.

^.~

“Feeling better?” Miroku grinned slapping Inuyasha heartily on the back.

Inuyasha cringed in response. “Not so hard…” Arching his spine a bit to ease the sting of the slap, he moved away from the monk and the demon slayer, trying to ignore their giggles at his discomfort. Weren’t friends supposed to be compassionate to all your aches and pains?

Kagome caught up with him and took his pace. “I wanted to ask you…”

“What?” The hanyou glanced behind him to make sure the others were out of earshot.

“When you were demon… you said I was yours.”

“I said a lot of stuff when I was demon. A lot of it was a lie.”

For a moment, Kagome stared at the path before them, pursing her lips. “I think on some level you were being honest with me.”

“None of it was said in any tone I meant.” Inuyasha answered, also staring at the road. “When I’m like that… it’s hard to control myself.” They continued on for a while, not speaking until he broke the silence again. “Even when I was lost in my… needs, I couldn’t hurt you. I would rather come back to myself and face death than lose myself completely.” His footsteps stopped and he caught her hand. “Kagome?”

“It’s alright, Inuyasha. I’m just glad you’re alive.”

Casting a nervous glance back over his shoulder, the hanyou pulled the young woman from the road and out of eyesight of their traveling companions. “If it must come down to your life or mine… I’d give up my own. My life means nothing… it never did.”

“Please don’t say stuff like that.”

“It’s the truth. You still have much to live for. I’ve wasted my own life, taken chances I shouldn’t take. When I was younger I had a death wish, but it was also a wish to survive and prove myself. It sounds contradictory, but if I couldn’t fight to survive, I didn’t deserve to live.”

“You didn’t want to be weak.” Her eyes stared into his, knowingly.

“But now I don’t want to be weak… so you and the others will live. If my strength keeps you alive… that is all that matters to me.”

“You fought your way back from the very edge of death. You DIED in my arms… but then you came back.” Kagome shook her head, staring down at his hands.

“You needed me.” His hands entwined his fingers with hers. “You need me as much as I need you.” Suddenly the hanyou stiffened and looked over her head at the way they had come. “We’re being watched.” Pulling her with him, he returned to the road, still holding one of her hands.

As they made their way back onto the dusty road, Kagome glanced back at the questioning looks their companions gave them before returning her gaze to Inuyasha. Aside from the stiffness to his usual fluid walk, he seemed fine. Only his eyes showed the guilt and sadness he felt over what he had done. With a small smile her hand tightened on his, reassuring him of her faith in him.

Inuyasha kept his eyes on the road ahead of him. Feeling her hand squeeze, he squeezed hers back. Keeping her hand in his, he continued on his way with her at his side.

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