SIMPLY A SERVICE PROJECT

By:  CLAUDIA FAGAN (Puppy Raiser of Hudson)

Dedicated to Hudson my faithful friend & Service Dog (Nov. 22nd 1993 - Oct. 28th 1999)

WARNING: KLEENEX ALERT

INITIALLY, PUPPY RAISING FOR CANINE COMPANIONS FOR INDEPENDENCE SEEMED TO ME SIMPLY AN IDEAL OPPORTUNITY FOR OUR FAMILY TO BECOME INVOLVED IN A COMMUNITY SERVICE PROJECT, SOMETHING TO WHICH I HAD LONG ASPIRED BUT WHICH IN REALITY, PROVED DIFFICULT TO ACCOMPLISH. HAVING THREE CHILDREN INVOLVED IN SCHOOL, CHURCH AND ATHLETIC ACTIVITIES TRANSFORMED EVEN FAMILY MEALS INTO AN EXERCISE IN STRATEGIC PLANNING. MY HOPES FOR A SHARED SERVICE PROJECT DIMMED OVER TIME BUT WERE NOT FORGOTTEN. THEN, LATE IN THE SUMMER OF 1991, MY DAUGHTERS SUSIE, JENNY AND I MADE OUR YEARLY TREK TO THE TRADERS POINT HORSE SHOW WHERE, WANDERING AMONG THE VARIOUS EQUINE RELATED BOOTHS, I LITERALLY STUMBLED OVER A GOLDEN RETRIEVER AND INTO MY RELATIONSHIP WITH CANINE COMPANIONS FOR INDEPENDENCE.

LED BY DAN AND GINNY O'BRIEN, THE INDIANA CHAMPIONS WALKED ME THROUGH THE HISTORY, MISSION AND WORKINGS OF CCI. THE FIRST ORGANIZATION ESTABLISHED TO PROVIDE SERVICE DOGS TO PERSONS WITH DISABILITIES OTHER THAN VISUAL IMPAIRMENT, CCI, A NOT FOR PROFIT CORPORATION, RELIES HEAVILY ON VOLUNTEER COMMITMENT SUCH AS PUPPY FOSTERING AND FUND RAISING TO ACCOMPLISH ITS MISSION.

ARMED WITH BROCHURES, PUPPY KISSES AND MY USUAL UNBOUNDED ENTHUSIASM, I CHARGED HOME TO MY UNSUSPECTING AND, AS IT TURNED OUT, EQUALLY UNENTHUSED HUSBAND. THE MAN WHO COULDN'T PART WITH TICKET STUBS WONDERED HOW I COULD POSSIBLY A: KEEP A PUPPY FOR A YEAR THEN GIVE IT UP AND B: EMBARRASS THE FAMILY ON OUR VARIOUS OUTINGS BY DRAGGING ALONG A RETRIEVER PUPPY. WHAT A SPECTACLE THAT WOULD CREATE! I CHEERFULLY REPLIED THAT A: TO LOVE AND GIVE UP THAT ANOTHER COULD BENEFIT WOULD BE A UNIQUE OPPORTUNITY FOR OUR CHILDREN AND B: THAT I MUST HAVE A PERSONALITY DISORDER. HE READILY AGREED TO POINT B, THEN SUMMARILY FORBID ME TO PROCEED. SEVERAL DAYS LATER AFTER A LENGTHY PHONE INTERVIEW, I RECEIVED, COMPLETED AND RETURNED MY CCI PUPPY RAISER APPLICATION TO THE NORTH CENTRAL REGIONAL TRAINING CENTER OF CANINE COMPANIONS FOR INDEPENDENCE IN DELAWARE, OHIO. THE WAIT THEN BEGAN.

ON A SUNNY MID-OCTOBER A FTERNOON, THE CALL CAME. THE

PUPPY'S NAME: HUDSON. BREED: GOLDEN RETRIEVER. AGE: EIGHT

WEEKS. THE NEXT MORNING, I LOADED THE CAR WITH A MYRIAD OF

PUPPY TRANSPORTING SUPPLIES AND SLIPPED OUT OF TOWN BEFORE

SUNRISE ON AN ADVENTURE WHICH WOULD ALTER MY LIFE IN WAYS

UNIMAGINABLE. THREE HOURS AND FIFTY THREE MINUTES LATER, I

ARRIVED AT THE TRAINING CENTER. AFTER FILLING OUT FORMS AND

TALKING WITH THE PUPPY COORDINATOR, I WAS INTRODUCED TO WHAT LOOKED TO BE A FLUFFY GOLDEN BEAR WITH SOFT, SOULSEARCHING BROWN EYES. HIS DEMEANOR AT EIGHT WEEKS: GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE. AND SO IT WOULD REMAIN FOR EIGHT YEARS.

IT HAS BEEN SAID THAT GOD IS DOG SPELLED BACKWARD. IN THE THIRTEEN MONTHS THAT HUDSON SHARED HIS LIFE AND LOVE WITH US, I CAME NOT ONLY TO BELIEVE THAT STATEMENT BUT TO STRONGLY SUSPECT, IN ADDITION, THAT GOD MUST ALSO BE A GOLDEN RETRIEVER.

HUDSON, WHILE I WAS BUSILY RAISING HIM SIMPLY AS A PART OF MY FAMILY SERVICE DREAM, CAPTURED MY HEART WITH THOSE AFOREMENTIONED SOFT, SOUL-SEARCHING BROWN EYES AND THAT GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE DEMEANOR. AS I SET ABOUT TEACHING HIM HOUSE MANNERS, BASIC DOG OBEDIENCE AND CCI COMMANDS, HE SET ABOUT TEACHING ME HOW TO TRULY LIVE. HE TAUGHT GENTLY, OF COURSE, AS THAT WAS ALWAYS HIS WAY. AMONG THE VARIOUS LESSONS MY MELLOW GOLDEN BEAR TAUGHT ME, SLOW DOWN AND SMELL THE DANDELIONS PROVED MOST VALUABLE. LIFE CAN BE BETTER ABSORBED AND ENJOYED AT A SLOWER PACE. HUDSON FELT DANDELIONS SHOULD BE NIBBLED ON AS WELL, BUT I REMAIN UNCONVINCED ON THAT POINT.

SEVERAL MOTTOS GUIDED HUDSON AS HE NEGOTIATED HIS LIFE'S ROAD:

1 . WHY HURRY

2. DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF

3. IT'S ALL SMALL STUFF

4. QUESTION, THEN COMPLY IF ADVISABLE

5. LIVE HONESTLY

6. PROCEED GENTLY AND IN KINDNESS

7. LOVE STEADFASTLY

8. NAP OFTEN OVER TIME AND THROUGH HIS UNFAILING EXAMPLE, I FOUND MYSELF INFLUENCED TO TAKE THESE MOTTOS AS MY OWN. LIVING THEM AS FAITHFULLY AS HE DID, THOUGH, PROVES A CONTINUING CHALLENGE AS GOD SPELLED BACKWARD IS DOG, NOT HUMAN.

HUDSON WAS ONE OF GOD'S BEST GIFTS TO ME AND TO MY FAMILY. OUR TIME TOGETHER FLEW BY, AND OUR ADVENTURES PROVED NUMEROUS. HUDSON TOUCHED MANY LIVES DURING HIS DAYS WITH US. SOME OF HIS BEST MOMENTS OCCURRED IN VARIOUS STORE CHECKOUT LINES WHERE OLDER PEOPLE OFTEN REACHED OUT TO STROKE HIM. INEVITABLY, THEIR COUNTENANCES WOULD RELAX AND SOFTEN AS THEY JOURNEYED BACK TO TIMES PAST AND BEGAN TO REMINISCE FONDLY ABOUT THOSE THEY HAD LOVED AND OFTEN LOST OVER THE YEARS. AS THEY SPOKE, HUDSON WOULD SIT, GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE, SEEMING TO LOOK INTO -R-iZIR SOULS WITH HIS SOFT, SEARCHING BROWN EYES. HUDSON ALSO SOOTHED EXHAUSTED,

IMPATIENT MOTHERS, "CRACKED" HARD SHELLED TEENAGERS AND REJUVENATED BORED, WITHDRAWN CLERKS.

ON MY OCCASIONAL VISITS TO A DOCTOR'S OFFICE OR TO OUR ATTORNEY, IT WAS NOT UNCOMMON FOR ALL PROFESSIONAL ACTIVITY TO CEASE. PHONES WOULD BE PUT ON HOLD. PATIENTS, CLIENTS, DOCTORS, LAWYERS, NURSES, PARALEGALS AND RECEPTIONISTS WOULD HAPPILY REMOVE THE MASKS WE ADULTS TOO READILY HIDE BEHIND AND MINGLE JOYOUSLY ON THE FLOOR AS EQUALS, RUFFLING HUDSON'S THICK GOLDEN COAT, TALKING BABY TALK TO HIM AND RELATING TO ONE ANOTHER WITH CHILDLIKE OPENNESS,. AGAIN, HUDSON SAT-GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE-BUT WITH JUST A HINT OF A SMILE ON HIS LIPS AND A BIT OF A TWINKLE IN HIS EYES. FOR MY PART, I WOULD STAND QUITE STILL AND BREATHLESSLY SILENT SO AS NOT TO SHATTER THOSE RARE MAGICAL MOMENTS OF CHILDLIKE ABANDON TO WHICH ADULTS SUCCUMB.

AS I WAS EMPLOYED AS THE LIBRARIAN, HUDSON BECAME OUR GRADE SCHOOL SERVICE PROJECT TOO. THE KIDS QUICKLY ADOPTED HIM AS ONE OF THEIR OWN. HE SERVED AS A CATALYST FOR LOVE BETWEEN AND AMONG ALL: THE BRAINS, THE POPULAR, THE CASTOUTS, THE JOCKS, THE ARTISTS, THE CHALLENGED, THE MUSICIANS, THE ADMINISTRATORS, THE TEACHERS, THE MAINTENANCE CREW, THE PARENT VOLUNTEERS AND THE PRESCHOOL SIBLINGS. HIS MEDIATION SKILLS REMAIN UNSURPASSED. HE LOVED GIRL SCOUT OVERNIGHTS AND SERVED GRACIOUSLY AS MASCOT FOR THE VARIOUS SPORTS TEAMS I COACHED. MOVIES AND PLAYS HELD GREAT INTEREST FOR HIM. HE WAS QUITE TAKEN WITH THE LIVE, ON STAGE ASPECT OF THEATRE BUT WAS MORE INTRIGUED WITH THE "I WILL "/" YOU WILL NOT" GET THE POPCORN OFF THE FLOOR GAME WHICH WE PLAYED AT THE MOVIES.

OUR ADVENTURES EXTENDED OUT OF STATE. HUDSON WAS ONCE SERENADED BY A JAZZ QUARTET AT THE COURT OF THE TWO SISTERS RESTAURANT IN NEW ORLEANS. HE WAS OFFERED THE CHOICEST SEAT ON THE COG RAILWAY, AND RODE SERENELY TO THE SUMMIT OF PIKES PEAK. AT OUR LAKE COTTAGE IN MICHIGAN, HE STOICALLY ASSUMED THE ROLE OF LIFEGUARD, RETRIEVING THOSE OF US WHO DARED SWIM OUT FARTHER THAN HE DEEMED PRUDENT. ADDITIONALLY, HE FOUND AND ADOPTED A LITTER OF LAKE KITTENS MUCH TO THE CHAGRIN OF THEIR MOTHER. NOT ONE TO DISCRIMINATE, HE ALSO "RESCUED" A BABY SANDPIPER WHICH HE BROUGHT TO ME EVER SO GENTLY, ENCLOSED ENTIRELY IN HIS SOFT MOUTH. UPON MY "GIVE" COMMAND, HE OPENED WIDE AND THE DAMP LITTLE BIRD FLUTTERED OUT UNSCATHED EXCEPT FOR THE DAMAGE TO HIS PRIDE.

ALL TOO SOON, NOVEMBER OF 1992 ARRIVED, AND WE PREPARED AS

BEST WE COULD TO BID OUR GENTLE GOLDEN BEAR GOODBYE. WE

PILED FAMILY MEMBERS, NEIGHBORS AND SCHOOL FRIENDS INTO TWO

CARS ON A DAMP, DREARY SATURDAY MORNING AND BEGAN THE RETURN TREK TO OHIO.

PUPPY TURN IN FOR CCI AT THAT TIME FOLLOWED A GRADUATION CEREMONY AND RECEPTION FOR THE LATEST CLASS OF JUST

MATCHED GRADUATES AND THEIR SERVICE DOGS, AN EMOTIONAL AND INSPIRATIONAL RITE OF PASSAGE. AFTER THE FESTIVITIES AND A

SERIES OF TEARFULL GOODBYES, I LED HUDSON TO THE PUPPY TURN

IN TABLE. HIS COLLAR AND LEASH WERE REMOVED AND RETURNED TO ME. THEN, HE WAS LED SLOWLY DOWN A LONG HALL AND OUT TO A

WAITING VAN FILLED WITH OTHER YOUNG RETRIEVERS ABOUT TO BEGIN THE NEXT PHASE OF THEIR CCI JOURNEY. THROUGH TEARBLURRED EYES, I WATCHED AS HUDSON REPEATEDLY LOOKED BACK AND PULLED GENTLY TOWARD ME, CONFUSED AND UNSURE. I FELT AS THOUGH MY HEART WERE BEING RIPPED FROM MY CHEST. FOR ONE INTERMINABLE MOMENT I CONTEMPLATED RACING DOWN THAT HALL, TEARING THE LEASH AWAY FROM THE HANDLER AND RUNNING AWAY-RUNNING ANYWHERE -- JUST ME AND MY GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE

GOLDEN BEAR. SERVICE PROJECT BE DAMNED! CONSEQUENCES BE DAMNED! GRADUALLY, AS IF IN SLOW MOTION FRAMES, I WAS DRAWN BACK TO REALITY AND TO MY SENSES BY THE NOT SO GENTLE

NUDGING AND LICKING OF THE FUZZY BUNDLE I HELD IN MY ARMS.

NAME: OSBORNE 11 (SOON TO BE SIMPLY OZZIE AS HE WAS SUCH AN

ENERGETIC, GOOFY CHARACTER). BREED: GOLDEN RETRIEVER. AGE: EIGHT WEEKS. DOORS CLOSE AND DOORS OPEN. I BEGAN THE CCI

CYCLE ANEW.

OF COURSE, THAT EVENING DID NOT MARK THE END OF THE STORY

OF HUDSON AND ME--JUST THE FIRST CHAPTER. HUDSON WENT ON TO GRADUATE. HE NEEDED AN EXTRA SEMESTER OF POLISHING, BUT

DOG UNTIL THE FALL OF 1999. PATTY AND HER PARENTS, EVELYN AND JUNIOR, BECAME A PART OF OUR FAMILY. WE HAVE ENJOYED A RICH RELATIONSHIP SINCE HUDSON'S PLACEMENT WITH PATTY INCLUDING REUNIONS AT SUBSEQUENT GRADUATIONS. THERE, HUDSON AND I

UPON PATTY'S "RELEASE " COMMAND, WOULD LOVE ON EACH OTHER

WITH WILD ABANDON FOR FIVE MINUTES OR SO, CATCHING UP ON OLD TIMES. THEN, HUDSON ONCE AGAIN WOULD BECOME THE GENTLE,

WISE, NOBLE ONE WITH THE SOFT, SOUL- SEARCHING, BROWN EYES,

UNCONDITIONALLY DEVOTED TO PATTY, THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE. YET, I KNEW I HELD A SPECIAL PLACE DEEP WITHIN THAT GREAT HEART OF

HIS.

HUDSON WAS ONE OF THE BEST GIFT, MY FAMILY EVER GAVE.

PATTY RETURNED THAT GIFT BRIEFLY IN THE SPRING OF 1999. SHE

ASKED US TO KEEP HUDSON FOR THREE WEEKS WHILE SHE AND HER

FAMILY TRAVELED TO ALASKA, AN ADVENTURE PATTY FEARED MIGHT PROVE TOO STRENUOUS FOR OUR OLD FRIEND WHO NOW SPORTED THAT AGING GOLDEN RETRIEVER CLOWN FACE.

WE MET ONCE AGAIN IN DELAWARE, OHIO. AFTER A LEISURELY LUNCH, I HEADED HOME, MY CAR LOADED WITH A MYRIAD OF SERVICE DOG TRANSPORTING SUPPLIES AND A SERVICE DOG. AS HAPPY AS HUDSON HAD BEEN TO GREET AND SPEND TIME WITH ME, HE WAS RELUCTANT TO BE SEPARATED FROM PATTY OR TO GET INTO MY CAR. HOWEVER, AS WAS HIS WAY, HE COMPLIED. GRADUALLY, HE RELAXED, RESTING HIS BIG SOFT HEAD ON MY LEG WHILE I DROVE, JUST AS HE HAD YEARS EARLIER. IT STRUCK ME FREQUENTLY DURING THAT THREE WEEK PERIOD HOW HE FELL BACK SO EASILY INTO OUR OLD ROUTINE, RETAINING ALL OF HIS OLD MANNERISMS INCLUDING LEADING ME GENTLY BY THE HAND TO GO OUTSIDE. WE WERE ABLE TO GO UP TO THE LAKE FOR SEVERAL DAYS. HE NO LONGER RETRIEVED US BUT LAZED PEACEFULLY IN THE SUN, KEEPING US UNDER HIS WATCHFUL GAZE AND FOLLOWING ME LEST I STRAY FROM VIEW.

IN SPITE OF MY RESOLVE, I FELL IN LOVE ALL OVER AGAIN WITH THIS DOG WHOM PATTY HAD DUBBED "THE GENTLE GIANT." THE DAYS AND NIGHTS PASSED FAR TOO QUICKLY AS HAD THOSE MONTHS SO LONG AGO. SOON HUDSON HAPPILY RETURNED TO PATTY. LITTLE DID ANY OF US SUSPECT THE POIGNANCY OF THAT GIFT OF TIME SPENT TOGETHER UNTIL LATE IN OCTOBER ON ANOTHER DAMP, DREARY FALL MORNING. PATTY CALLED, A CATCH IN HER VOICE, HAVING JUST RETURNED FROM HER VETERINARIAN. IT WAS STRONGLY SUSPECTED THAT HUDSON HAD CANCER. AN APPOINTMENT WITH A SPECIALIST LATER THAT SAME DAY CONFIRMED THAT SUSPICION AND WORSE: IT WAS FELT HUDSON HAD BUT A FEW DAYS TO LIVE. HIS ONCE PROUD AND STRONG BODY WAS FULL OF MALIGNANT TUMORS, AND HE WAS WRACKED WITH PAIN. THIS CONDITION HAD DEVELOPED RAPIDLY AND JUST AFTER PATTY AND HER FAMILY HAD RELOCATED TO SEBRING, FLORIDA, FOR PATTY'S HEALTH.

FOLLOWING PATTY'S SECOND PHONE CALL AND WITH THE SUPPORT OF MY FAMILY, I MADE PLANS TO FLY TO FLORIDA TO BE WITH PATTY, HER PARENTS AND HER DOG, HUDSON. AT 5:OOAM THE NEXT MORNING, MY DEAR FRIEND JACK DROVE ME TO THE AIRPORT. SEVERAL HOURS LATER, AFTER A FLIGHT AND THEN A DRIVE ABOUT WHICH I REMEMBER LITTLE, I ARRIVED AT PATTY'S HOME

WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS THE DEPTH NOR MYRIAD OF FEELINGS

AT OUR REUNION. HUDSON, ILL AS HE WAS, HURTING AS HE WAS,

STILL SERVED AS GRACIOUS HOST--AS CATALYST FOR OUR LOVE FOR

EACH OTHER. HE LAY VERY STILL--AS EVER, GENTLE, WISE, NOBLE--HIS

HEAD IN MY LAP, HIS SOUL-SEARCHING SOFT BROWN EYES GAZING

INTO MINE, AND MINE ONCE AGAIN BLURRED WITH TEARS. THE ONLY

SOUND TO BREAK THE SILENCE: THE SOFT SLOW THUMPING OF HIS

FEATHERY GOLDEN TAIL. AND SO THE STORY OF HUDSON AND ME

WOULD END. ON THE NEXT DAY, THE MORNING OF OCTOBER 28,1999, THE VETERINARIAN ARRIVED EARLY TO RELIEVE OUR "GENTLE GIANT" OF HIS PAIN. PATTY HAD SAID HER GOODBYES AND FOUND HERSELF UNABLE TO REMAIN IN THE ROOM. SHE AND HER FATHER LEFT TO HUDDLE TOGETHER IN ANOTHER PART OF THE HOUSE. EVELYN AND I REMAINED WITH HUDSON. I HELD HIM GENTLY. HEAD IN MY LAP, HE KISSED ME SOFTLY, THUMPED HIS TAIL TWICE, LOOKED INTO MY SOUL ONE LAST TIME, THEN DRIFTED AWAY, PEACEFULLY IT SEEMED.

OUR LAST HOURS WITH HUDSON WERE HOURS WELL SPENT. WE HAD LAUGHED AND CRIED, POURED OVER HIS PUPPY ALBUM AND SHARED VARIOUS HUDSON STORIES. WHAT A BLESSING IT IS TO LIVE, TO LOVE, TO SERVE, TO BRING OTHERS TOGETHER IN LIFE, LOVE, SERVICE AND YES, EVEN IN DEATH. AND WHAT A BLESSING IT IS TO JOURNEY FROM LIFE SURROUNDED BY LOVE.

SIMPLY A SERVICE PROJECT? YES, THAT, BUT INFINITELY MORE.

CLAUDIA FAGAN