|
Failure
Is Not Final!
Have you been
fired, downsized -- or just plain rejected on the job? Then get ready for a
bright future.
“When they told me I was being laid off, I just sat there like a dead man,”
Ted told me over the phone. “I was shocked. I never thought it would happen to
me. I thought, How am I going to tell my wife that her husband is a failure?”
People like Ted believe they’ll never fail in their careers. “I gave my life
for that place,” they tell me. Perhaps that’s their biggest mistake. Since the
first recorded downsizing where Adam got kicked out of his cushy job as a
gardener in Eden and demoted to a mover of stones, out-of-work men have had to
struggle with fears.
We struggle most with the feeling that we’re no longer the breadwinners and
failing in our responsibilities as provider. We’ve failed twice in one shot --
we’re lousy at work and we’re lousy at home. But let me share some good news
with you: When you lose your job or fail in your career, you’re supposed to
feel lousy. That’s normal.
Showing your disappointments has a healing effect on the soul. It is during
those times that God promised us a Comforter. It is no accident that Christ
didn’t refer to the Holy Spirit as the Motivator or the Encourager, but as the
Comforter. Even during those times when Jesus became weak and discouraged, He
showed it. Scripture tells us that Jesus wept, but it also tells us He sighed.
He felt the letdown you’re feeling. He understood injustice and oppression.
So stop beating up yourself about your career failure and recognize this
universal truth: Everyone fails! It is a natural course of events. It’s bound
to happen now and then.
In today’s society, job loss is becoming the norm. The days of choosing one
career or one employer for life are history. Real job security comes from
being employable, not from being employed. A headhunter told me recently that
six-month unemployment gaps on a person’s résumé are becoming standard.
All right, so you failed in your career. I consider failure a necessity in
life and in business. I said in my book, “The 25 Most Common Problems in
Business,” that if you’re not failing at least five times a day, you’re
probably not doing enough. The more you do, the more you fail. The more you
fail, the more you learn. The more you learn, the better you get. And you’ll
know you’re learning when you stop repeating the same mistakes.
Look at some historical figures who failed, learned and came back. Every major
corporation rejected Chester Carlton’s idea of a xerograph machine, so he
started his own company called Xerox. An editorial manager fired Walt Disney,
accusing him of having no creative ideas. The owner of Macy’s tried seven
times to get his New York store up and running. Albert Einstein’s teacher
labeled him “uneducable and retarded,” and Thomas Edison’s school wrote down
that he was “too stupid to learn.” Alexander Graham Bell failed to sell his
telephone idea to Western Union. Hey, even Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times
before he hit his record-breaking 714 home runs.
Don’t forget to look through the pages of the Bible for failures who bounced
back. Samson lost the honored position of judge but redeemed himself in his
last moments. David failed as a king when he had Uriah killed, but God
restored him. Elijah ran from his prophetic duties because of Jezebel but his
prophecies later came true. Peter failed as a loyal disciple but returned to
lead the church. Use these stories as your inspiration to realize just how
normal you are.
We men are trained to see ourselves in our work. The first question most
people ask you at a party is, “What do you do for a living?” It’s a bit
awkward to say, “I do, uh, unemployment.”
Understand that you are not what you do. Stop seeing yourself as the
proverbial hole in the donut. Remove the donut and the hole ceases to exist.
If you believe you are what you do, remove your job, and you cease to exist.
Eighty-nine times Scripture makes reference to believers finding their
satisfaction “in Christ,” not in their careers. Romans 15:17 says, “Therefore
I glory in Christ Jesus in my service to God,” (NIV). We’re admonished as
Christians in 2 Corinthians 5:16-17, “So from now on we regard no one from a
worldly point of view...Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new
creation; the old has gone, the new has come!”
Let me give you six helps on how to overcome any career failure you might
face.
1. Remember that you’re not the first guy to deal with this. What you’re going
through is normal and you don’t need to carry the burden alone.
2. Don’t make excuses for your failures. A failure is a failure. For whatever
reason, something failed; learn from it and go on.
3. Avoid blaming someone else -- that won’t get you anywhere.
4. Work your network by making systematic calls, asking people for advice and
not just asking if they know of available work. The cardinal rule of career
life is networking.
5. Don’t burn your bridges. Exit with class because your next job is likely to
come from a relationship you built on this one.
6. Be prepared. Develop a plan to be ready for another layoff down the road.
That takes half the blow away when it happens. Evaluate your current and
future financial situation. Analysts recommend that you have enough savings in
the bank for a six-month layoff.
As I talked with Ted on the phone, we discussed some of his fears about being
laid off. They spiraled downward. “I said to myself that my wife will have to
go back to work; we’ll have to sell the house; my kid won’t be able to go to
college; we’ll go in debt; I’ll end up doing low-wage
manual
labor; we’ll have to live off welfare; I’ll have to rob a bank; I’ll end up in
jail!” We laughed once we saw how ridiculous those thoughts were.
I suppose laughing at our troubles helps us handle them. Find a touch of
everyday fun even if you’re laid off. And remember Paul’s promise when your
thoughts spiral out of control, that “my God will meet all your needs
according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” Ted admitted, “Without my
faith, I don’t know how I’d have gotten through.”
One last bit of advice I’d offer guys going through this tough time: Don’t
confuse your job with your life. They aren’t the same thing. There’s a lot
more to being a man than being a breadwinner. We’re finally beginning to
recognize that as a culture. In a “Time” magazine survey of 500 professionals,
89 percent felt they needed to spend more time with their families, and 69
percent wanted to slow down and live a simpler life.
Sure, you’ve got to carry on. You need to re-evaluate your past and your
future, and take responsibility for managing your own career. But in the end,
you need to weigh all your career decisions against your family and your faith
and keep all three in balance. Use your family and your faith to help you get
through the tough times. Take comfort in the promise in 1 Peter 5:10 that
“…the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after
you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you
strong, firm and steadfast.”
By Jim Zabloski for “New Man” magazine. All rights reserved.
POWER VERSE
“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it
is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every
situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I
can do everything through him who gives me strength.”
--Philippians 4:12-13, NIV
QUOTABLES
“There is no failure except in no longer trying.”
--Elbert Hubbard
|