It's the beginning of winter. We have had some light snowfall now that the kids enjoy playing outside in. Danielle has truly made her mark here at the school with her teaching and counseling of the children. She has a wonderful way about her – her compassion and understanding and acceptance of everyone makes it easy to chat with her and all the residents love her.

She and Marie became especially close, spending a good deal of time going out shopping and being like sisters. There wasn't anything Danielle wouldn't try or do if it benefited the kids.

Things have been pretty tough lately.  I can't begin to say what it is I am feelin' and I am assuming she ain't feelin' the same.  

We would go jogging together or work out in the gym together. We have had several more growlin' matches that made heads turn. Some of them matches turned into pushin' and shovin' matches and man, did that scare the hell outta them kids. And, I quickly learned she don't stand for my shit when I am actin' like a brat. But, I wonder about this as being aggressive flirtation since she would go cold and back off afterwards.  Then, I did something stupid - I nearly killed her in the gym.  I could only thank Scooter and Rogue for intercepting what might have been a disaster.  I don't know what came over me.  To make matters that much worse, I forced myself on her stealing a kiss in the hallway and now she's pissed as hell with me and I don't blame her one bit.

We somewhat made up - at least, she tolerates my presence.  Yet, it hurts me that I hurt her. Whenever I was not out on a mission or attendin' to somethin' around the mansion, I find myself watching Danielle at whatever it is she is doing. I even slipped into the back of her classroom on several occasions just to hear her voice as she gave her lectures to the students.

Many times I sense Danielle spying on me. She doesn't realize I feel it. Then again, maybe she does know. We share the same gifts and feral traits. My senses tingle whenever she's near. I know she's watched me workin' out, doing odd jobs around the mansion, or spending time alone in the courtyard. I smell her any time she's around – a sweetness that intoxicates me.

Anytime I am near her, I feel such urges to get close, but then I hear them words that Jeannie told me when I was pursuin' her – about dangerous men and flirting. It keeps me wonderin' if she feels the same way. I admit – I am dangerous – and maybe she too likes chasin' danger – then again, maybe she don't.   It's constantly been in the back of my mind that she's just playing with me - like a cat plays with a mouse.

I know she is aware of the ongoing tension between me and Jeannie whenever we're around each other. I still worry about her. She'll always be special to me and Scooter complicates matters that much more. He and I are constantly at each other's throats. Both Danielle and Jean get mad sayin' stuff about us and our 'male posturin', or some shit like that. I know she knows how I felt for Jeannie. I am really startin' to wonder if this distance towards me is because of it.  I ain't all animal, ya know. 

Another mission resulted in Jeannie's needin' my help.  Scooter had enough to manage makin' a rescue, and I made it my business to assist Jeannie.  After our return, I spent some time watchin' over her.  She seemed so tired - to the point of absolute exhaustion.  Scott didn't like it so much, but tryin' to explain that to him is impossible.  And, it set back my progress with Danielle.  I thought we were gettin' along pretty well considerin' what I did to her.

Then again, maybe she is too afraid of tryin' something new because of the way that jackass ex-boyfriend treated her. I can't say I would blame her. To have yer heart broken sucks.  Nevertheless, I broke her trust.  I fucked up and I don't know what to do to fix it, and I am obsessing over her – needin' to know her every whereabouts. I was hooked as of that first day, and she really had me when she showed her animal heart to me in the dining hall that morning.

And yet, I won't push since I am unsure if she feels anything for me, or if she ever will now.  Ever since we became friends again, she's been flirting with me again.  But, the flirting stops when I try to respond.  What if she just likes flirtin' with me like Jeannie did? Am I bein' too pansy to admit I don't want my heart broken again?  I know she's still a bit angry with me now and I keep my distance even though it is killing me.



"Hey, Logan," Marie called out. She trotted over to him and took a seat by his side. He took a long hard drag on his cigar. She looked out over the courtyard.

"Hey, kid," he replied softly.

"Why ya so quiet? Somethin' buggin' ya?" Marie probed.

"Nothin' much, kid. Where's yer little buddy?" Logan asked quickly trying to change the focus of conversation.

"Who? Bobby? Oh, he's out with the boys. Sometimes it's good to have time away," she said.

"Hum," he said before taking another drag on his cigar. His eyes drifted in Danielle's direction. She was playing with several of the younger kids out in the newly fallen snow.

"Oh, Logan. Ya really like her, huh?" Marie asked.

"She's cool," he replied blankly.

"Logan, why can't ya admit ya have the hots for her?" Marie asked. Logan put out his cigar.

Logan looked into Rogue's eyes sensing she was trying to pull down his defenses.

"Look, I can tell when I'm being played with," he said with anger.

"Played with? Huh?  Don't be silly.  You two are mad crazy over each other and too chicken to admit it," Marie said.

"Really?" Logan snidely asked.

"Yeah, really.  Logan, you both hurt each other and I think ya need to talk about it," Marie said.

"What's talkin' gonna solve?  I'll find out she ain't interested?" Logan asked.

"I think ya might be surprised," she replied.

"I gotta go," he said and stormed off into the mansion.

And, Logan did go. He left the mansion without saying goodbye to anyone – just slipping away in the night. Marie knew he was running and why. But, she kept it to herself.

Marie started putting all the pieces together. During private chats with Danielle, she would catch her saying certain things that gave Marie insight into what Danielle was feeling.  Danielle did feel Logan had never really let go of his feelings for Jean. There always was a certain light that would shine in his eyes whenever he was close to Jean. And after the skirmish on that last mission, Danielle saw that protectiveness of Logan's focused all that much more on Jean. Danielle hid her own feelings for sake on not being hurt again.  And, she was afraid to trust another man after what happened with John.

As much as Jean denied any feelings and fell back on her marriage with Scott, it didn't fail that she would run to Logan for help in desperate times. Marie knew Danielle had seen so many times how Logan and Jean interacted together. She saw the happy glimmer in Logan's eye whenever Jean was around, although he had the same glimmer when around Danielle too, but she blinded herself to it having any true meaning.  She told Marie how he kissed her in the hallway after their nearly deadly duel.  Marie knew Logan was not good at expressing himself but that his feelings ran deep for Danielle.

Marie had observed that when Logan and Danielle were together, there was an unnerving tension between them. There were times Logan would try to get close only to have Danielle back off, or that Danielle would respond and Logan would back off. Yet, it was so apparent they were avoiding their real feelings.

Logan had been gone nearly a month now and no one even mentioned his name, especially Danielle. Life went on without any hint of Logan returning, as was always the case with him.  But, Marie would catch Danielle every so often deep in thought and she knew it was concerning Logan.

Danielle was out supervising the younger kids as they played in the first heavy snow of the season. Kurt joined her and tried to make his and Marie's observations known to her.

"Why do you hide what you feel for Logan? Is it fear of having your heart broken again?" Kurt asked.

"What I feel doesn't matter. He's not even around. Didn't even say goodbye…" she trailed off.

"I know you are goin' to be angry with me, but I cannot help to voice what I see. You are in love with him, and he with you – and both of you are too scared to have faith in taking a chance," he said.

"Kurt, I know he and Jean had feelings for each other and I think those feelings still haven't died – for either him or Jean. Besides, a man on the rebound is nothing to get involved with," she said strongly.

"But, you have touched his heart now and he is frightened to trust his feelings for you. That's why he ran.  He knows he hurt you - he hurt someone he loves," Kurt said.

"Why couldn't he tell me?" Danielle asked as tears welled up in her eyes.

"He's afraid, Danielle.  He's been hurt too.  You know Jean rejected him," Kurt explained.

Kurt put his arm around her. He could feel her torment but understood why she felt the way she did.

"Please don't hate me – I think you are making a big mistake in making assumptions.  Logan is in love with you," Kurt replied.

"I don't hate you. I can't allow myself to be hurt again," Danielle said before rounding up the kids.



I returned two months later but not with any intention of stayin' too long. I thought I would collect the rest of my meager belongings and go back to Canada – back to my simple life of bar brawlin' and driftin' from place to place. Jeannie finds me as I am headin' down the hall to the Professor's office.

Stupidly, I glance out one of the windows and I see her givin' horse ridin' lessons in the snow-covered outdoor arena. She's on this cool bay horse. I have no clue what's she's doing but the horse looks like it is dancin'. The kids are watching her in awe. I wish I could tell her how she has my heart twisted around her little finger – I would bow to her every demand just as that horse obeys her every command. That's why I have to run again.

Jeannie snaps me out of my dreamy state by laying her hand on my shoulder.


"Hey, are you alright?" she asked softly.

"Yeah. Fine," he replied softly while turning to face Jean.  He was glad she didn't make mention of his unannounced return.

"Logan, I know why you are leaving. Your mind is screaming with confused thoughts concerning your feelings for her," Jean probed. 

Logan looked out the window again - she went there and the words were like knives piercing his heart.

"You think she's pretty special," Jean said looking for any reaction from Logan. His expression didn't change and he remained silent, but Jean could see the smoldering passion in his eyes.

"Logan, I am reading some pretty strong thoughts coming from you.  You are in love with her," she added.


I look right into Jeannie's eyes. My heart is burning with a little rage that's building up. I try to hold back but I just can't. She struck a nerve and I nearly exploded.


"What's the point? I'm just the dangerous guy," he said snidely. He knows Jean could feel his rage.

"Hey, I didn't mean to upset you. I think you are a great guy – I always did. But, you knew I had…" Jean attempted to explain herself before being interrupted.

"Yeah, you have Scooter. And, I am still just the dangerous guy you flirted with. Admit it, part of you wanted me," Logan said sternly.

"Logan, I didn't mean to hurt you. I just didn't want to start something I knew wouldn't go anywhere, or was wrong for both of us," Jean responded.

"I told you I can love, too. Yet, no one sees that I am a man with feelings, not just an animal," Logan added. He looked out the window again.

"I know you can love. You wouldn't be reacting this strongly," Jean said.

"You don't know anything about me – what I am capable of being. I could have been your `good guy' if you only gave me the chance," Logan retorted. "I am a good guy, damn it."

"Yes, you are. And, you are attracted to her because she's just like you in so many ways. I feel your torment and understand your hesitation," Jean stated.

She tried to comfort Logan resting her hand softly on the side of his face.

"Logan, you are in love with her. I see that same look in your eyes that you had for me. Tell her what you are feeling. Don't run," Jean said.

"Like it matters," Logan replied and pulled away from her. His heart had sunk deeply. Jean could sense his pain.

"Logan, it does matter. You can't keep hiding these feelings. You can't keep being bad ass Logan. Besides, you two get along so well. I always see you too joking around and flirting like teenagers," Jean replied.

"And, she turns off the charm as soon as I start getting close – goes cold like," he replied.

"I would too if I thought you were still in love with someone else. She would keep herself distant to avoid getting hurt. Makes sense to me," Jean replied.

Logan turned to the window – Jean could feel his anger sensing he would probably put his fist through the glass just to break something and feel pain.

"I know nothing of my past other than the last 18 years or so. I met Marie and you and remembered what it was like to be a man again. I fell in love with you. Do you know how it was for me to choke down what I felt for you because I knew you and Scott belonged together? Do you know how crushed I was to have you tell me I am just good for flirting with? Now, I have someone else capture my heart that is only two doors down. Do ya know how terrified I am not wanting to hear those words again? I am sensing she probably will say I am too dangerous for her. Do you really know what I am feeling? I want to tell her. I want to share all my feelings with her. I sometimes wish I could just grab her and hold her close, to ease her tensions and tell her I want her and to make her know I am a good guy. Do you know the hell I go through every day wanting to get close and dealin' with my own reservations? I don't want to again hear how I am just the dangerous guy to be flirted with," Logan sternly replied.

Jean hesitated to respond. His barrage of questions and comments stunned her.

"Maybe the real problem is me. I said some pretty cold things to you. You know she thinks you still want me."   Jean paused a moment.  "Do you?"

"I let go of you long ago. Now, I want her and I am afraid to tell her. Maybe she's just scared like me. Maybe she really doesn't feel the same. I just don't want to hear she's just flirtin' with me for the thrill of the danger," Logan responded.

"You have to talk to her, Logan. You have to tell her even if it means facing the possibility of rejection again," Jean said.

"For what? To have her break my heart like you did?" Logan asked strongly and began walking towards the door leading outside.

"Logan! Logan, stop!" Jean ordered grabbing his arm. Logan came to a quick halt trying to restrain his flaming temper.

"You are drawing conclusions without even asking her yourself. What if these things you think she feels are not true? Or, what if her distance is because of our past or just being afraid and you refuse to talk to her about it? You could be letting something really good slip through your fingers," Jean said.

"Look, I wish you and the professor would stop reading my thoughts and trying to tell me what is good for me. Why don't you go back to little Scooter and leave me alone," he said with restrained rage.

"Logan, I am not being invasive.  Both you and Danielle have been projecting so strongly that the professor and I can pick up your feelings from miles away.  Go talk to her.  I think if you reach out to her genuinely you might get the response you want," Jean suggested. 

"I think it's better if I just go - for her sake," Logan replied.

"Running isn't going to answer the questions and you are going to feel an unbelievable emptiness if you don't at least find out," Jean said.

"Do you know what the worst thing is, Jean?  I hurt her.  I lost control and hurt her.  I broke her trust," Logan said.

"Then, go to her.  Talk to her.  Get her trust back.  She wants you to make the move, Logan," Jean said.

Logan looked at Jean unsure of what to say.  His head was filled with so many things and he needed to sort them out for himself. Logan was indeed still feeling the hurt and his hostility was proof enough that he was scared to have his heart broken again.

Jean almost felt as if she did more damage than good. Scott appeared from around the corner just as Logan was headed out the door slamming it behind him. Scott could see Jean was upset and instantly knew it had something to do with Logan.


"You ok?" Scott asked Jean.

"Yes. I'm fine," she responded. Scott could tell she was very rattled.

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked lovingly.

"No," she replied and headed down the hall alone. Scott let her be.

He looked outside seeing an angry Logan sitting alone.